>Everyone in VIP, no, in 2ch, please hear me out.
>The other day, I was totally mistaken for a molester.
>And I don't mean it as a joke, I was actually mistaken for one.
It all started with this...
Previous thread:
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099839179/
First thread:
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099651701/
I tried to start a new thread too, but I kept getting a connection timed out error.
Thanks!
I'm glad I didn't hastily start a thread myself.
A potential stalker, mistaken for a molester, chases after a mentally unstable woman.
Thanks.
After that, Molester Man and Miss Understanding go to a coffee lounge where Molester Man explains himself and manages to clear her suspicion of him. They proceed to have lunch together and then go home.
That night, Molester Man starts the first thread and almost fucks everything up with his thoughtless e-mails, but somehow manages to arrange a meeting with her on the next day to accompany her to the police station.
On the second day, Miss Understanding calls Molester Man and picks him up. They then meet up with Glasses and head to the police station together. At the police station, Miss Understanding, Glasses and even the policemen apologize to Molester Man.
Later that day, he has omelets for lunch with Miss Understanding. She asks Molester Man for advice about getting too many annoying e-mails from Glasses, but he has to leave early because of his part-time job.
He tells her that he wants to contact her again and have lunch with her, but she doesn't seem too euphoric about it.
The point of discussion right now is when he should send her an e-mail.
Age: 20 years old
Occupation: I'm a third-rate university student and I live alone
Height: 163cm
Weight: 50kg
Looks: In the "Rate my face" thread, I was told I look normal. In aquariums, I can easily get in with a ticket for middle-schoolers, that's how much of a babyface I have.
Dating history: Ever since second grade in middle school, I've dated countless women, each more beautiful than the last.
Amongst others, I've had relationships with maid robots, childhood friends and vampires... in dating sims.
Miss Understanding
Age: 20 years old
Occupation: Freelance part-timer, apparently works in a family restaurant and lives alone.
Height: Approx. 155cm? Quite a bit smaller than me and that's not easy.
Weight: Approx. 45kg? Very little in any case.
Looks: She'd probably get a standard score of 60 to 70 in the "Rate my face" thread. She's cute and has a babyface too.
Dating history: I only know bits here and there, but she seems to have dated a few guys already.
That means, the stalker thing must have happened quite recently.
Heya, Miyuki-tan!＾＾
Age: In his twenties?
Occupation: Works in some trading company. Probably a salesman.
Height: Approx. 170cm? Didn't look that tall to me.
Weight: Approx. 60kg? Rather skinny.
Looks: I think he'd get at least a standard score of 60 in the "Rate my face" thread. He's what you'd call a young and attractive salaryman.
Dating history: Umm... most likely not a virgin.
Someone please add to the summary that OP got crab from Glasses.
Huh, the misunderstanding was cleared up?
What is this thread for then?
Or does OP want to take revenge on her?
Molester got crab delivered from Glasses.
When he saw the incident, he didn't act like he didn't see anything, but came to help.
And when he found out that it was a misunderstanding, he apologized sincerely with an apology gift.
He must be the nicest guy in the world.
No, it's about a stalker who wants to become Train Man.
Eating crab is serious business.
It's Train Man's even more hopeless version.
∧＿∧ +
（0ﾟ・∀・） ba-dump ba-dump shine shine
（0ﾟ∪ ∪ +
と＿_）__） +
Thanks.
Btw, take a pic of the crab with your cell phone and upload it!
I'm disappointed too.
If this was a game, he made the wrong choice right in the first event.
Yeah, he is if you look at it objectively, but unfortunately for him, the people in this thread see him as OP's love rivalw
>>24
yes
( ﾟ∀ﾟ)彡 Realtek Yeah!!
⊂ ⊂彡
(つ ﾉ
(ノ
＼ ☆
| ☆
(⌒ ⌒ヽ /
＼ （´⌒ ⌒ ⌒ヾ ／
（'⌒ ; ⌒ ::⌒ ）
（´ ） ::: ） ／
☆─ （´⌒;: ::⌒`） :; ）
（⌒:: :: ::⌒ ）
／ （ ゝ ヾ 丶 ソ ─
Thank you very much. (^ω^；)
So, Molester Man's got a crush on the woman now??w
I didn't expect my thread to make it this far. It makes me want to try harder to get the good end.
Since I already had All-Bran for dinner today, I think I'll save the crabs for breakfast and lunch tomorrow.
He's totally in love with her.
Are you Molester Man, the man in question?
What is your goal anyway? Tell us in a few words.
"The great battle for Miss Understanding". 6 words orz
It wasn't clear if OP likes her or not from his first few posts, but then everyone in the thread kept posting that OP loves her and he happens to be the type of guy to get easily influenced by others.
Thanks a lot.
Molester, Misunderstanding, Glasses, Delivery, Crab
is the summary of the first thread.
Summary of the previous thread:
Yesterday:
OP gets a thank-you-for-lunch e-mail from Miss Undie.
And in the following e-mail exchange, he manages to ask her out for a second lunch? (No specific date yet.)
Currently:
OP got a crab delivered as a token of apology from Meganesh and we're having a strategy meeting on how to use the crab to get Miss Understanding to come over to OP's place.
Come on, please upload a picture of the crab.
I've already decided to make it my fap material for today.
Did you make the phone call?
Did he testify to the police that you're guilty or something?w
Did you make the phone call?
ttp://www.artpia.co.jp/naruse/reciplist.html
Beware of the following when preparing a crab.
■ How to tell if it's a live or boiled crab:
Live crab is, well, still alive. Normally, if you boil a crab, it'll turn bright red, while live crabs are brown.
If you really can't tell, break the tip of one of the crab's legs and take a look at the meat. If the meat is slightly translucent, it's raw, if it's opaque white, it's boiled.
■ How to store crabs:
Generally, it's recommended not to store crabs longer than two days before you eat it.
You can't store live crabs.
Live crabs should be cooked and cooled off afterwards. Then pull off and discard the triangular flap from the crab's belly side, wrap the crab in a paper towel or in a hand towel, put it into a vinyl or polyethylene bag and deep freeze it.
The crab should be eaten within 5 to 7 days in case of a freezer and within a day if put into a refrigerator.
Go read the old threads FFS.
Got his voicemail both on his home phone number and his cell phone... Well, I left a short message on his answering machine for now.
Looks like OP's post at the end of the last thread got overlooked with the new thread and all.
So you can't just freeze it and sit back and relax, huh...
You'll have to eat it in the next few days then.
Use it as an excuse to get her to come over asap.
1. "Yes......I just can't stand crab. (in a very small voice)"
"Ah, really? I'm glad I asked beforehand.
It's just that an acquaintance sent me crab and I thought I'd ask if you want some since it's too much for me alone. HAHAHA"
Like this, you can change the topic and everything will be fine. Just eat the crab alone in this case.
2. "No, I like crab."
"I'm glad to hear that. Actually, I got a crab from an acquaintance and it's a bit too much for me alone. Would you like to have some of it?"
Then follow the advice in post #937 from the previous thread and make her take almost all of it.
It'd be awesome if she suggested eating it together, but there's no need to be disappointed if she doesn't. Just be happy you made a good impression on her.
What do you think of these scenarios, guys?
VIP QUALITY sure is kind.
"I got crab delivered from Glasses today.
But nevermind that.
Will you eat out with me sometime?"
How's this?
Ohh, I had missed it.
Thanks.
Isn't it better to mention that the crabs are from Glasses?
Wouldn't it remind her that she's to blame for the incident and make it more difficult for her to say no?
Save the rest for Miss Understanding.
3. "No, I like crab."
"Ahh, I'm glad to hear that. I just ate the crab an acquaintance sent me the other day, so would you like to have the empty shell?"
I lol'd.
ヽ( ･∀･)ﾉ凸))Д´） Ahh...
ｸﾞﾘｸﾞﾘ
Post #937 from the previous thread? That's meーーー!!!
Man, you're so humble. You had the same idea as me.
A call, a call, a call━━━ヽ(ヽ(ﾟヽ(ﾟ∀ヽ(ﾟ∀ﾟヽ(ﾟ∀ﾟ)ﾉﾟ∀ﾟ)ﾉ∀ﾟ)ﾉﾟ)ﾉ)ﾉ━━━!!!!
Try to find out if Glasses sent something to Miss Understanding too!
You should just marry already, with a crab as your matchmaker!
Is it okay if I eat your matchmaker then?
Wow, hold on, our matchmaker is a crab!? I admit I laughed.
Is the phone call from Glasses!?
Share it with us, man.
Alright. I'll make crab soup for him every morning then.
Crabs don't really squirm, but wriggle, don't they?
Making her take almost all of it was not my idea.
So, when do we have the wedding? Let's get it over with before someone eats the crab. orz
Molester: "ASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM?!!!"
>>1 I know you're on the phone, but tell us just that.
Thanks to Molester Man, another couple was born, huh?w Catch my drive?w
Raise a crab together with Miss Understanding!
"No, you see, I dragged someone to the police because of a misunderstanding and sent him crab as a token of apology."
"Eh, so this 'Glasses' they keep mentioning is you?w"
He could be having this conversation with a colleague right now, for all we know.
And >>1 likes tropical fish too.
Having fun, aren't we?
I like the oden in 7-Eleven the most.
Use this opportunity to stay in contact with Meganesh.
True that. We can't completely write off that possibility.
Glasses is a salaryman, isn't he?
There's bound to be a VIPPER or two that are salarymen.
Oden is nice...
Warms you up in the cold.
I promise I'll be quiet too.
Why are you having a blast talking to Glasses on the phone?w
>I promise I'll be quiet too.
Lol.
Crab Man sounds kinda scary...
I think it's cool. He'd be like Edward Scissorhands then.
Damn... The way the phone call went, it's entirely possible that I start getting e-mails like we're friends or something.
Good job.
Seriously now?w
You mean Black Tiger?
Good job.
Seriously now?w
It's not one of your delusions, is it?
I wasn't able to ask much about Miss Understanding anyway.
Whoa, you know it!?w
Is this the beginning of the Crab Man homo route?w
I don't mind if it's just a summary, but please do it.
Remember VIP QUALITY! We need to know what you talked about if you want us to help you.
■ Main protagonist:
- Train Man: A kind otaku with undying courage and a humble personality.
Meets his fated love by saving her from being harassed in a train.
Asks for advice on 2ch and manages to change completely by following the 2channers' advice.
- Molester Man: A servile and clingy otaku.
Comes to like the woman that mistook him for a molester for some reason.
Asks for advice on 2ch, but ignores their advice and jumps the gun when it counts the most.
■ Heroine:
- Hermes: Admires Train Man's courageous action and gradually falls for him. A very caring person.
Her hobbies and tastes are far above those of an ordinary person. Has a sophisticated feel to her.
- Miss Understanding: Mistakes Molester Man for a molester because of a misunderstanding and gets the police involved.
Has an emotional trauma since she suffered from stalking in the past.
Might be somewhat paranoid. What she really thinks of Molester Man is still unknown.
■ Supporting characters
- Friend: Points out to Hermes that she might have feelings for Train Man and makes her realize she's in love.
Undoubtedly plays the role of the love cupid.
- Glasses: Misled by Miss Understanding's misunderstanding, he drags Molester Man to the police station.
A few days later, his attitude changes abruptly the moment he finds out that it was a misunderstanding.
Sends crab to Molester Man as a token of apology.
Seems to be in contact with Miss Understanding, but she's annoyed by his frequent contacts.
Glasses is Molester Man's love rival. What he really thinks of Molester Man is still unknown.
Hurry up with the report.
clack
"Hello, Molester speaking. Who's calling, please?"
"Hi, it's Glasses... I just got your message. Did my package arrive in one piece?"
"Yes. Thank you... But is it alright? It looks expensive..."
"Expensive? Preposterous!(←he seriously said it) It's cheap stuff!!"
"(Cheap? Huh?) It can't be cheap! It's worth at least a Yukichi or two, isn't it?"
"Yukichi..? Ah, but it really isn't anything special! It wasn't expensive."
"No way! There's even a little booklet included! Like a little encyclopedia of crabs..."
Then we talked about crabs for a while. The blue king crab that was mentioned in the thread came up too. Good thing that I had informed myself a little about crabs beforehand.
Does Glasses wear Hermes glasses or what is going on?
Lolw
ヽ( ･∀･)ﾉ凸))Д´） Ahh...
ｸﾞﾘｸﾞﾘ
Because then you'd be two best friends fighting over the same girl...
And she might go "Don't fight because of me!"...
Don't ask someone how much a gift cost, man. It's impolite. Though I guess it's because you do stuff like this that you're Molester Man.
Looks like I'm late to the party again... And I tried to get home especially early today...
I like how Molester Man is such a petty guy compared to Train Man. Feels a lot more realistic that way.
Miss Undie or Glasses?
Because the way things are looking right now, you might even make it to the Grand Finale!
It's not that I got bored of talking to him, but I couldn't really keep talking to him about crabs forever even if it was fun.
So I asked him
"Huh? Have you got guests over?".
If he did have guests, I figured I'd just tell him I don't want to disturb them and hang up.
"No, it's just the TV. After I got home, I was watching TV when I saw your message..."
That's when Bakatono's laughter from my TV synchronized with the laughter coming from the phone.
"........are you watching Bakatono?"
"Eh? You're watching it too!?"
"Well, as a Japanese, I just can't help but watch when it's on."
"I know, right!? I knew I would miss the first half, so I had set my VCR to record it!!"
"The first half was pretty funny too."
"Ehh? Really? I can't wait to watch it! What did they show in the first half?"
Yeah, I know what you mean.
The characters in Molester Man all have their flaws which is a good thing.
OP said he's like a salesman, but he's probably just good at approaching strangers and conversing with them.
Though I admit, it can be a little off-putting to be approached like that...
You're a real genius when it comes to doing unpredictable shitw
Keep it up.
Why can you never talk casually like that with Miss Understanding?w
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Invite him to dinner as thanks for the crab
Keep going like that and you're gonna get the Crab Glasses end.
You could've ended the call there, but asked him about Bakatono instead and kept the conversation going, huh?
You're actually a good guy, aren't you?
"I knew it! Haha. What about the Dachou club?"
"They stood out as expected. I don't really like them though... They lack impact."
"I know what you mean! Since they're regulars, I wished they'd contribute more to the show."
"Yeah. The show really needs Mr. Tashiro back."
"I don't think Mr. Tashiro can return to Bakatono after that scandal."
"But you hoped a little he would, didn't you?"
"Just a little."
"I guess, a comeback is out of the question, huh?"
"I wished he would come back though, even if only for Bakatono."
And so we had a heartwarming chat about Bakatono & Tashiro. What the heck am I doing?
"My misunderstanding has caused you a lot of trouble too. I'd like to apologize by asking you out for dinner in a first-grade restaurant.".
→ Dinner with Glasses
Yeah, what the heck are you doing?w
This is your last chance, don't let it slip away!!
That's when Bakatono's laughter from my TV synchronized with the laughter coming from the phone.
→ "........are you watching Bakatono?"
→ "Eh? You're watching it too!?"
I lost it herewww
Even if I was Miss Undie, I wouldn't accept that kind of invitation... Glasses doesn't even have a real reason to apologize to her.
Because it's an invitation to a restaurant dinner, it's so obvious that he's after something else... It'd be a different case if it was a restaurant gift card though.
I'd prefer a Miss Understanding end though. Try asking her about how to cook crab or something.
Sorry for the late response, but you're not late to the party at all.
Where'd you been btw?
Now I have to start over and think about what to write to Glasses.
Lol
"Wanna watch a Drifters DVD with me at my place?"
Should be good enoughwwwww
"THREE WAY"
( ・ω・` )
（⊃⌒*⌒⊂)
/__ノωヽ__）
Well, I got home from work, saw how the last thread had reached 1000 and assumed I'd missed the party...
Yesterday, when I checked the thread at around midnight, everyone had already left.
You know how it always goes. They lead you on and on by acting like they're interested and when you actually go for it, they suddenly say ".......................I'm sorry. (in a very small voice)" and ditch you just like that.
"The crab you sent me is way too much for me alone... Will you eat it together with me, Mr. Glasses?"
"I'm sorry... My misunderstanding has caused the two of you so much trouble..."
"No, no, don't be. It was because I was acting all suspicious!w Besides, it was Miss Understanding's misunderstanding. You're not at fault at all, Mr. Glasses.",
I said it to see how he reacts.
"No, you see, I didn't know how to contact you, so I had to ask Miss Understanding and caused her a lot of trouble too."
"Ahh, I see. There's no need to worry about me though. I'm just glad that no one got harmed and everyone's fine."
"I know I'm being annoying, but... please let me apologize again..."
"No, you really don't need tow You even sent me crab."
We hung up shortly after that.
I wasn't able to find out much about Miss Understanding, but there's one thing I got out of this. Glasses is a bro.
Ohh, so that's where the crabs will come into play.
If someone ever made a summary site, this is what it'd probably say about it:
--------------------------------------------------
When everyone else in the thread was discussing what the next step should be, Molester posted this:
"oh crap im having a blast on the phone rihgt now",
derailing the thread and leading it to a very unexpected ending...
--------------------------------------------------
Thanks for the report.
It was as interesting as I thought it'd be.
OP, tell us where you wanna go from now on. Will you go for Glasses? Miss Understanding? Crab?
He's like the cupid for them in a way.
Miss Undie, on the other hand....................................................................what's with her? (in a very small voice).
Come out of hiding and post something!
Who would have thought the thread would grow so much because of one phone call with Glasses...
Subject: Thank you very much for the crabs.
"Thank you very much for the eloquent apology and the gift.
To be honest, I had already stopped harbouring any resentment against you the day before yesterday, but now that you've sent me such a nice gift, I'm fully convinced that you're a very kind and good person.
I live alone and can't possibly eat so much crab all by myself, so would you like to have crab with me?
And if you let me have a taste of your stiff bud for dessert afterwards, I'll have no more hard feelings whatsoever.
To put it politely... Shall we do it?"
I don't have any plans on going gay for Glasses.
Well, I do think that a really cute guy > a really ugly woman, but it's the exception to the rule.
I fucking lol'dw
<´､,＿＿＿_＼
＼＿＿＿__/
┗i┛
'＼
|
,,从从从从､､､/
,,;'' ｀｀ﾞ'';,、
,;ﾐ ,，⌒ヽ 、 ﾐ;, This thread warms my heart...
ﾐ （ ・ ）|ヽ 'ﾐ
ﾐ ヽ____ノ | | ﾐ
ﾐ ,，⌒ヽ / ,/ ミ--―､
┌ーﾐ （ ・ ） / ,/ ﾐ ＼
｜ ﾐ ヽ____ノ ／／ ﾐ ヽ
.ﾉ ''`ｗ､､､ ￣ ,,,ﾐ'ﾞ ﾞ|
~~ ｀｀｀｀｀｀｀｀｀ ~~
The question is, who will he eat it with?
Let me tell you this though. The way things are right now, the Miss Undie route will only lead to a bad end imo.
If you pick the Glasses route, however, there's a pretty good chance you'll get a happy end.
Glasses or Miss Undie...
Do we let OP decide or do we decide by ourselves?
Ok.
After all, he wants to become Train Man too, doesn't he?
It wouldn't be strange at all if casuals knew about them.
I mean, a lot of casuals are on 2ch nowadays.
( ;;;;;＿;;;;; )／'''
丶.-'~;;;;;;;;;;;;;;~'-､
／~;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,ヽ、
,;';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;ヽ、
./;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;ﾍ
l;;;;;;;;;' ~''''''''''~ ';;;;;;;;l
.l;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;l
l;;;;;;;;;;' .;;;;;;l
k;;;;;;;' '''''' '''''''' ;;;;;l
ﾍ ヽ;; ,,:=・=:､ ,:=・=:､,､;:;; ﾉ Admit it, Mr. Molester Man.
∧. ,,ﾉ(､_, )ヽ､,, l You're actually after my body, aren't you? ♥
／ ｷ ｀-=ﾆ=- ' /ヽ、
./ ヽ 、 ｀ﾆﾆ´ ／ ヽ
/ ヽヽ､_ ___ ／ |
｀＼＼／／
／／
You wouldn't want people to call you a lame Train Man ripoff, right!?
In that case, take a shot at Miss Undie and get rejected like a real VIPPER! After that, switch to Crabses and share a beautiful love with him!!
Then, publish the whole thing as a smut novel!!
Whoa! It's a Sandworm from Space Family Carlvinson!w
I said this in the previous threads too, but Train Man was even big in the TV news, wasn't it?
I'd say there's a pretty good chance that he knows Train Man.
That's not all, the VIP banner would be changed to a picture of Glasses and a crabw
In surprise buttcrabs style, of course.
ｒy ´･ω･｀ヽっ
`! i
ゝ c＿c_,.ノ
（
）
.∧ ∧.(
(`・ω・∩＜Give me crab!
o ,ﾉ
Ｏ＿ .ﾉ
.(ノ
But we really are running out of things to talk about.
As long as I don't write any e-mails or take any other action, this could be the end of it.
But well, for now, I'll just try eating the hairless crab raw as a Sashimi.
Wait!
Crabses might have poisoned the crabs!
I see! Molester eats the crab, becomes paralysed, Glasses sneaks into his house and stabs him...
...with his dick.
Subject: Good evening
"Would you like to eat Crabses with me sometime?"
Hurry up and ask Miss Understanding out to a crab party, then give her a French kiss in a public park!
Glasses must have sent Miss Understanding creepy e-mails! That's why she's wary of him.
It's a surefire way to get arrested for stalking.
This is my first time eating raw crab, but I didn't think it'd taste this good...
It's much better than the grilled crab I once had at a restaurant... Why is it so damn good..?
Oh no, you didn't...
You son of a...
Dude, your first post in this thread is "Eat the crab!"w
He basically ate what could have been his last hope!wwwwww
/ / iﾆ)ヽ, /rj:ヽヽ ヽ
.| ;〈 !::●:c! ' {.:●:;､! 〉 | U
| (つ`''" ＿＿ `'ｰ''(つ | w
| ///// | | /// | a a
ヽ γ´~⌒ヽ. / | / A a
ヽ / ヽ / | /⌒ヽ a A
＼/ | |￣￣￣￣| ／ ヽ H h
/ | ／
Why are you eating it by yourself!?
（ ＿＿＿＿_ ) ○ （ I hope Mr. Molester likes the crab I sent him...
（ ／ ヽ ＼＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
（ ｌ ⌒ ⌒ヽ ○
（ ヽ , ―― ､ , ―‐‐､
（ 〉=| ( ・ ) |⌒| ( ・ ) |
（ | ー―‐' ヽ ―‐'
ヾ（6 ヽ ( :::::） ､ ）
ｌ ＿＿＿＿＿__)
ｌ （ ＼|ﾉ'
| ヽ ￣￣￣￣ノ
＿＿／ヽ＼￣￣￣￣| ｌ＼＿
￣ ＼ ヾヽ //|
It resembles sweet shrimp, but it's not as flimsy. It feels more squishy like when you're eating mantis shrimp.
The taste is a lot like sweet shrimp too, but not as greasy and there's no bad after-taste. I'd say it resembles flatfish in that aspect.
And my God, does it go down smoothly. It feels so great to eat it. This is awesome!!
Urk... Don't destroy my image of Glasses.
It'd make both you and us feel better if you tried something and failed rather than failing without having tried at all.
You'll have my blessing, should you be successful.
I didn't think he'd actually go ahead and eat it this quickly!w
First time I see that one.
God, I laughed so hard.
But hey, it's not like you get crab everyday, it should be okay to eat one of them.
As long as he deep-freezes the other one to use it as bait, that is.
said a voice. When I turned around, Glasses was standing behind me.
Then we went to bed together.
Okay, now tell Glasses about how his crab made you feel.
Sounds about right.
I think I'll go get myself some crab now...
I feel like if this goes on, this is going to turn into a ">>1 eats crab alone and writes about it" thread.
"Let's write what you wanna eat right now"
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100001991/all
It'd be a lot like him too.
Thanks.
I went and posted it there like a boss.
It'd be even better if he posted that his hands are itching.
I think I will eat the rest boiled.
I want some too!
You could also make miso soup with crab for a royal feast.
crab♪∧.∧ ,，──,－､ ♪
(,,ﾟДﾟ) / （： ：（ ） ))
|つ／つ `ー─``ー'
～| | ┣━━┫┨
Ｕ Ｕ ┠┤ ┣┫
It's okay, I still have two servings of hair crab left.
I won't touch it and write an e-mail to Miss Understanding about it.
Now, what kind of e-mail should I write?
>>265
I just googled "crab steamed in sake" and it looks delicious. I'll definitely try it.
The main body should be cooked in miso soup after all, huh? It looks pretty simple to make too, even for a beginner like me.
♪ ∧∧ (～)
ヽ(ﾟ∀ﾟ)ﾉ
(へ )
> ♪
"Do you like crab?"
OP isn't even in touch with her anymore, is he?
Oh shitwwwwwww I used the wrong copypastawwwwwwww
"Ah, Mr. Molester, you got crab from Mr. Glasses too?"
The way things are going, I see the following happening.
OP enjoys crab steamed in sake
↓
Gets drunk as fuck
↓
Ends up writing a creepy mail to Miss Undie in his drunkenness
How's this?
For starters,
you could just send "Good evening", you know?
It's not strange to send short e-mails like that to friends.
His last e-mail was only yesterday.
I don't know, man.
She said she's got an appointment on Wednesdayw
>>275
I could steam the crab in sake right away if I wanted, but I read that if you open the main body, you have to use the contents right away. That means, I'd have to make miso soup too.
I'm still debating if I should go out to get miso soup.
>>276
Hmm... I don't think we're close enough to be called friends yet...
"I got crab. What did you get, Miss Understanding?"
It doesn't have to be tomorrow, you know?
How about this?
"The crab's in my freezer, it should be okay until the weekend."
Send this to her and see how she reacts.
I'll go get Marukome miso paste from Jusco now.
Counting on you guys to give me advice on what to write to her when I'm back!!
Have a safe trip.
"It was delicious. Good night."
Miss Understanding: "I'm also free on weekends (she actually used the kanji for "end, closure" here). If I haven't gotten a shift by then, let's have lunch together!"
was the last e-mail she sent if you ignore the "Good night" ones, right?
Why don't you wait two days or so and then ask her if she has any plans for the weekend?
In any case, make sure to keep the remaining crab in the freezer. Don't you eat it until then, no matter what happens!
"Let's write what you wanna eat right now"
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100001991/
Subject: "Crab"
"Miss Understanding, do you know how to prepare crab? Please teach me if you do."
Then go from there.
So, what happened since I was here last?
Someone give me a short summary pls.
>"If I haven't gotten a shift by then, let's have lunch together!"
Guys, do you think she meant "dick" when she wrote "shift"...? （´・ω・｀）
Wouldn't you normally ask your parents or your friends?
I feel like it's weird to ask a woman you've only met a question like that.
Meant to link to >>293. OTL
Hey, watch it.
A few days after their fateful meeting, OP gets crab delivered from Glasses.
They have fun talking about Bakatono on the phone and OP eats Glasses' crabs while thinking of him.
This is the sad love story of OP, Glasses and Miss Understanding.
You're not welcome here.
Posts asking for summaries are getting really annoying.
I don't think it's weird. >>293 sounds fine to me.
"I'm tired of your shit. I'm eating Crabses instead."
I bet he's taking so long because he's buying a crab spoon or some other useless shit...
I hope he bought two... （・｀ω´・）
By the way, the food department of Jusco is open 24/7... Huh? Not where you guys live?
The Jusco in my area is open 24 hours too, but only the food department actually works at night.
At 22:12... It was right before I left to Jusco!! Why did I not notice... OTL
What do I do what do I do? Do I call her back?
She called━━━━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━━━━ !!!!!
Why don't you write her an e-mail??
What do I talk to her about?
This came way too unexpected. What do I do?
∧＿∧ +
（0ﾟ・∀・） ba-dump ba-dump shine shine glitter glitter
（0ﾟ∪ ∪ +
と＿_）__） +
It's not too late, give her a call!
Send her an e-mail like
"Are you still awake?"
Show her your family-oriented qualities by letting her know that you can cook.
Did you by any chance buy crab spoons?
That's it!
It's only 11pm. If she's an adult, she should still be up!
Wait, does Miss Undie live with her family?
Look, she called you, so she must have something she wants to talk to you about!
Just call her!
She came to pick him up, she's always the first to write an e-mail and she even asked him out for lunch. See what I'm getting at?
Besides, a snow crab has a lot more meat than the hair crab, so you should save the snow crab for later.
You know what? Fuck it. Fuck sharing the crab and fuck using it as bait.
Keep the crabs a secret from Miss Understanding and eat them yourself.
Well, hang in there, >>1.
>>319
I bought a tool that's like crab scissors and a crab knife in one!!
Nah, I'm pretty sure she lives alone.
11pm isn't late at all.
Keep us updated if possible!
"I got crab from Mr. Glasses and it's too much for me to eat alone. Would you care to have some of it?"
"Miss Understanding, I got a crab gifted by an acquaintance and wanted to ask if you like crab.
If yes, I'd like to share some of it with you.
By the way, do you know how to prepare a crab? Please teach me if you do."
How's that for an e-mail?
But you've decided to call her, huh... All the effort I put into writing this post... All for naught! ヽ(`Д´)ﾉBAAWWWWW
Threesome! Threesome!
"Well, he sent me some too. It's way too much for one person, right? Let's eat it together if you like!"
Go get her, boy!
"I have to work..."
I'll go get some booze!!
Is he going berserk again?
I just got out of bath and I'm waiting here all naked YO!
Make sure to secure an appointment for next time!
You, put on some clothes!
Ask her how to prepare crab!
The Battle of Fallujah
"I was able to make some time tomorrow. Would you like to have lunch with me tomorrow?"
What did she call you for?
Tashiro Masashi got caught driving 130km/h in a 80km/h zone on the highway.
"I tried putting beads into my anus today.
It felt so great."
Tokoro George! Tokoro George!
She said "Insert a suppository into me! My fever's not going down!".
I said "Ask Mom and Dad to do it for you!", but Mom was apparently out and she didn't want Dad to see her naked.
My sister turned away from me and lied down on all fours.
She covered her private parts with a hand, told me not to look at them and stuck out her ass to me.
I slowly started inserting the rocket-shaped suppository into my little sister's ※, but it got pushed back out immediately no matter what I tried.
She was like "Push it in as far as possible!", but I said "I don't wanna touch your dirty anus!".
So she took a condom out of a drawer and said "Then use this!".
Talk to her about the date!
Ask her if she's still free this weekend!!
My little sister told me again and again not to do anything weird before she lied down on all fours a second time.
I emptied my mind and pushed the suppository in as far as I could in one motion.
She let out a small "Ahh!", so I immediately apologized even though I hadn't done anything wrong.
The suppository was finally in, but then I realized I couldn't pull my finger out.
I was like "Oh shit, I can't pull my finger out!" and started moving it around in a panic, which in return made my sister scream out in pain "Ugh! Don't move it around!".
I shouted at her "Try to relax your muscles!" and she shouted back "Then keep your finger still! Pervert!" as loud.
I said "Okay, let's both calm down. Now, look! Try to relax. See, you can do it. Yes! I got it out.".
As soon as my finger slipped out with a loud "PLOP!", my sister kicked me out of the room with a "BONK!" and shut herself into her room.
Six years have passed since then.
Every time I hear my sister's voice from her room say things like "I love anal sex!"...
I have to wonder if I'm the one to blame for it.
But ask her indirectly!!
It should allow a smooth transition to the topic of crabs!
And don't forget to breathe in and out loudly when you say it.
This might be even better than the crab...
WHAT ABOUT THE DATE THIS WEEKEND?
↓
Start talking about "Food Prejudice King", for instance
↓
"Whenever I watch it, I wonder about which dishes I'd choose if I were a guest. Do you do it too?"
↓
"Is there any food you don't like, Miss Undie?"
↓
Talk about the lunch this weekend
↓
You have just now secured yourself a date!!
"I'm on my way to your place right now. Let's have dinner together.".
┏━┛┗━┓┃┏┓┃┏━━━┓┃┏┓┣┻┛ o
┗━┓┏━┛┃┗┛┃┗━━━┛┃┗┛┃ ﾟ ★
┏━┛┗━┓┃┏┓┃ It's here! ┃┏┓┃┏━━┓
┗━┓┏━┛┗┛┃┃ * + ┗┛┃┃┗┳ ┃
+ .┃┃ ┏┛┃┏━━━━┓┏┛┃*. ┃┏┛
┗┛..｡ ﾟ +┗━┛┗━━━━┛┗━┛ .*┗┛
ﾟ ☆ .
_,,,,--＝'' ＿＿＿,,-―――＝''￣ ＿_,-―＝''￣ / +
＿,,-＝'' ＿,,-―＝''￣ ヽ.. ／ . . . .
￣ ,,-＝''￣ ＼ ／ . 。. ★ ☆
,,,.―'' ＼ . ／ ヽ／ 。. .
／ ...,,,__ （ ヽ |＿＿_/ ／( ヽ, . *
丶 ,,,,,, ) ） | / ) ） ,,,,,／ ☆ +
ヽ γ´~⌒ヽ（ (. | / （ ( ／. . ☆
＼/ | ) ）. |_/ ) ）/⌒ヽ +★ *
,,.-''" r _､ 三三ヽ."
／ i {ぃ}} _ﾆﾆ三ﾞ､
/,.､ `--" 二三三； _,,. -'''"
ｌ {ゞ} i _ﾆ三三| _,..-'''"
.l `" i_,,...-''| ニ三三!''"
_,.-! ! i -ﾆ三三/
l´,.- l ＼/ -ﾆ三三／ It's here!
_. ! ｒi l＼ __--三三三='"
j'‘´j `´ | ! ` ミ三三三三三＝''"
i',.. '´} | |
l,.. r´ '´
(*ﾟ∀ﾟ)=3 pant pant (;ﾟ∀ﾟ)=3 huff puff (*´д｀*) pant pant (；´Д`) pant pant (*´Д`) pant pant (；´Д`) PANT PANT
Since she wasn't picking up, I decided to hang up after the 7th ring.
ring ring
Just as I was about to put the receiver down after I'd heard the 7th ring...
rattle... rattle
"He-hello?"
"Hello?"
"Ah, yes! Hello?"
"Yeah, I hear you. Hello."
"Who am I speaking to?"
"Eh? Ah? It's Molester speaking..."
"Eh.......... Ahh! Mr. Molester!!"
"Yes, it's me, Molester."
Write faster!!
∧＿∧ +
（0ﾟ・∀・） ba-dump ba-dump shine shine
（0ﾟ∪ ∪ +
と＿_）__） +
I bet you guys are too.
Doesn't she know >>1's number?
Throw crab shells at him.
/∧＿/∧ /∧＿/∧ tremble tremble
<<｀｀ДД´´;>> <<;;｀｀ДД´´>> shake shake
// ＼＼ // ＼＼ tremble tremble
⊂⊂(( ヽﾉヽﾉつつ ⊂⊂ヽ// )) つつ shake shake
しし(（＿）) (（＿）)ＪＪ
"Please pull the peppermill out of me!".
"Ah, sorry, this is my home phone. I'm calling because I saw that you had called me on my cell phone... Are you busy right now?"
"No, I'm not busy. It's alright."
"Don't worry, I can call you again later."
"No, it's okay, really."
But she seemed a little out of breath for some reason and her voice sounded a bit clearer than usual... Of course, I wasn't sensitive enough to just ignore it.
"No, you must have been in the middle of something. I'll call you again when you're done."
"But I'm already done."
"No, no, no, I really don't mind calling you again later."
"I just got out of the bath! That's all!!"
"Ah, that so...?"
"Yes."
I'm so sorry.
Post faster.
She must have jumped out in a hurry when she heard her phone ring.
A VIPPER wouldn't go "Ah, that so...?". A VIPPER would ask for a pic and post it!
pant pant
So insensitive. Can't believe you're the same guy who had that smooth Bakatono chat with Glasses.
If you'd asked "Are you wrapped in just a towel right now? Or are you wearing a bathrobe? pant pant"
you'd be a GOD.
I'd be annoyed toow
VIP QUALITY etc.
lol
Are you the OP of that Fire Emblem thread?ww
.//⌒＿＿＿ ＼ + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
//_／ ＼＼ ＼
＼＼ ＼
＊ + (（ | Yeeeeeehaaaaaawwww!
| ∩
+ 。 | | | ＊ + 。 + 。 +
| | |
| / | ._ + 。 + + ＊
＼￣￣~/ /~￣ .＼
||＼ ~^~^~^~ ＼ + 。 + + ＊
||＼||￣￣￣￣￣￣￣||￣ That is VIP QUALITY.
|| ||￣￣￣￣￣￣￣|| http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
／:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::ヽ
/::::::::::::ハ::::;:::::::::::::::::ﾞ:,
,'::::;i:/ﾚ' ヽiヽ:::::::::::::::::!
l::::|'r,:=; ,:=;､';i:::::::::::::!
.,r'‐;|.l !::::i i:::::i l |::::::::::::| Hello, is that you, Mr. Molester?
,'.三ﾐi 'ｰ'ﾞ 'ｰ'ﾞ |:::::::::::::| I'm butt naked right now.
| 'ri''ヾ:､ r‐┐ ,.|::::::::::::::|
l |i,＿_!:＞'=''r‐''".i:::::r､:::::|
! l,|： |" ﾞ､'､ ;:/::;/ ヽ:|
l! |大" `''"/'"' ヽ
! | ヽ| ､i ,. イ'
You guessed right.
>>419
I'm not the OP. When I saw that thread, I felt like rummaging through my drawers and digging out my copy of Fire Emblem though.
What happened then!!??
"Ah, right, right. Mr. Molester, you don't have any lectures tomorrow, right?"
"That's right."
"Umm... Can I borrow some of your time tomorrow? Only if you don't have anything else to do, of course..."
"Eh? But didn't you say that you have an appointment tomorrow?"
"Yes, I did... Did you also make an appointment for tomorrow?"
Actually, I took a shift for tomorrow. I'm unlucky as always. But I figured I'd ask what she wants first and then decide if I want to skip work.
"No, not really... What did you want to do tomorrow?"
"Can we meet up tomorrow...?"
"SNORT!"
You see, when I get nervous, I sometimes can't catch my breath and snort like a pig....... You don't?
"Eh!?"
"...I'm sorry. Could you please repeat what you said?"
Keeping my cool in such a difficult situation.... I'm cool as ice.
"I asked if we could meet up tomorrow."
WOOOOOOOOOOOOーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーー
post faster goddammit
/ |'''' |::::://O//| /
＼ |‐┐ |::://O/ ノ ヾ､/
＿ |__」 |/ヾ. ／ ／
／ ＼ ヽ___ﾉ ／ . へ、,／
＼ ／ / { く ／
＼ ＼ !､.ノ `ー''"
＼ ＼ //
| ＼ ＼ﾞ′
＼ | ＼ That is VIP QUALITY.
＼ | http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
＼|
／-‐ ‐‐-､ U
/､_(o)_,: _(o)_,i W
/:: r_ 〉､. ｝ aa
|:: /( [三] )ヽﾉ Aa
|:: " /⌒ヽHH
|:: /|::. |.´Д`；）
|:: / |:: | /
/:: / |::. | /| |
/: _/ |:: | / | |
i::_ﾉ i:_.j.j Ｕ
Stop blue-balling us, YO! I'm waiting here with my fly open, you know?
By the way, what do you guys think of my shlong?
pant pant
It's extremely... small.
You know what?
Just die already.
Looks like Osomatsu-kun.
and try to convert him to some strange cabbage religion.
Something tells me that it'll be Christian Lassen paintings.
>>1 is going through quite an interesting phase of his life.
∧ bang
☆ ,/ ', bang
＼ /' ( ＞)_7 ∧
,i' "/ _,,/ ',
☆― | , '" ,..- ､
､()人､ i' （ ● ）`7
`ｰ `ー ―` '''"~
>>451
Grr... I may be short and small, but I'm a man who devours guys for breakfast regardless of their sexual orientation, you know?
Most likely case: A pot/jewelry/painting/religious cult
〒 ! + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
+ 。 | |
＊ + / / Yeeeeeehaaaaaawwww!
∧＿∧ / /
（´∀｀ / / + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
,- ｆ
/ ｭﾍ | ＊ + 。 + 。 +
〈＿｝ ） |
/ ! + 。 + + ＊
./ ,ﾍ |
bang ||| j / | | |||
――――――――――――
"I'd like your advice on something."
"When? Where? What time? Advice on what?" (←I don't remember it well, but I'm sure I fired a salvo of creepy, insensitive questions at her while breathing heavily.)
"But only if you're free... At 12. Do you know the restaurant near XX?"
"Yes, I do."
"I work there. Do you think you can come? I don't think it will take long..."
You can count on me, baby.
"Err... (A fake pause to check my schedule) ...If it's at noon, I can come! (The "If it's at noon" part is important.)"
"Really!?"
Boo yeah!!!
Look, I'm going to die if I don't cum before midnight.
Write faster!
EAT THE CRAB WHILE IT'S FRESH...
>"Err... (A fake pause to check my schedule) ...If it's at noon, I can come! (The "If it's at noon" part is important.)"
What an annoying little actw
You're gonna get suckered into a religious cult! Be careful.
So it's gonna be paintings, huh?
I got totally mistaken for a molester part 4
>1 Name: VIPPER Date: 04/11/05 19:48:21 ID:w8ZHuVTS
>Everyone in VIP, no, in 2ch, please hear me out.
>The other day, I was totally mistaken for a molester.
>And I don't mean it as a joke, I was actually mistaken for one.
It all started with this...
Second thread:
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099839179/
First thread:
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099651701/
Previous thread:
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099999070/
What could it be?
They often ask people out to a family restaurant.
Guess that's a mentally unstable woman for you. Always does what you expect least.
The thread exploded while I was taking a bathww
Wonder what it is she wants advice on.
First, she says she's got an appointment, then she suddenly changes her mind at such a late hour and asks you to meet up with her tomorrow...
Looks like you're after a high-maintenance girl, OP.
ﾟ. ｏ * 。ﾟ。ﾟ.。ﾟ。+ﾟ 。 。 ﾟ。 ﾟ 。 ﾟ
ﾟ` .ﾟ .ﾟ. ﾟ. . ﾟ . ﾟ . , . . . 。 ﾟ .
,-､ ,.-､
./:::::＼ ／::::::ヽ
/::::::::::::;ゝ--──-- ､._/::::::::::::::|
/,.-‐''"´ ＼:::::::::::|
／ ヽ､::::|
/ ● ヽ|
l , , ,u ● l
.| (_人__丿 u ､､､ | I can't hold it in anymore
l l Please post the rest quicklyーーーー
` ､ /
`ｰ ､__ ／
/`'''ｰ‐‐──‐‐‐┬'''""
What do you think Miss Undie wants to talk to you about?
Please join us."
Anyways, what's taking you so long YO!? >>1
Nappeun Namja!
Going there dressed in Uniqlo won't cut it this time then!
Isn't it a bit early for that?
This isn't Machi!!
"Sure, sure."
100% sure.
"Okay then, if you tell a waiter my name, they will offer you a table in a corner..."
"Eh? I don't follow..."
"Well, I work there after all."
"Eh? But is it okay? I mean, you'll be working, right?"
"No, no!w We can't talk during my shift, of course! My shift ends at around noon."
"Ahh, I see."
Then she told me how to get there in detail.
I already knew which restaurant she meant, so I only listened with half an ear while checking the thread and straining my frontal lobe, trying to come up with a way to keep the phone call going.
What the hell? I even stopped fapping halfway through for this shit.
If she'd said she wanted to show you something, then it'd have been obvious (like a painting or jewelry exhibition). But advice?
I don't think she'd invite him to a family restaurant for that. Perhaps, it's not her who needs advice, but one of her co-workers.
With half an ear?w
Listen when someone's talking to youww
It's probably going to be a Souka Gakkai invitation.
They show you some dumb video with Hikomaro or Hisamoto Masami talking about how to change your life for the better.
Then, in the end, they beg you to chant the Nam-myoho-renge-kyo for 3 minutes and don't take no for an answer.
Miss Undie: I got a package from Mr. Glasses...
Molester: Me too. He sent me crab. Mr. Glasses is such a nice person.
Oh yeah, I won't be able to eat it alone, so would you like to join me?
Scenario B:
Miss Undie: I got a package from Mr. Glasses...
Molester: Me too. He sent me crab. Mr. Glasses is such a nice person.
Miss Undie: You got crab too!? I was thinking I'd gotten myself another stalker. I've misjudged him.
Scenario C:
Miss Undie: I got a package from Mr. Glasses...
Molester: Me too. He sent me crab. Mr. Glasses is such a nice person.
Miss Undie: ......(Goes silent with an awkward look on her face.)
Miss Understanding's problem┳
┃
┗
Take the crab with you and have her cook it there. Then you can have it for lunch together.
I didn't know there was an AA like that...
Do you have one of the Cows and Typhoons?
That's from a "Haneru no Tobira" skit, isn't it?
"Yeah, I think so."
...we fell into a silence for a moment.
"Oh, by the way! How do you like to eat crab!?"
↑ I really shouldn't have said this. Damn. It's all you guys' fault!!
"Huh?"
"Well, you know... crab."
".......................uhh, cooked, I think..."
Oh crap, she doesn't know how to react! Gotta do something about it...
"Crab Sashimi is good too, don't you think?"
"Really? I wouldn't know, I've never had any."
"You have to try it once! It's good!"
"Huh...? Okay."
...................what in the world am I doing? OTL
Now that I think about it, we should've realized then that it's a scam.
Oh boy, suddenly I'm not so excited about her route anymore.
I think I'm starting to like you.
○出×男
You're a good guy.
You jizzed in your pants so hard you almost made me jizz in my pants too.
What in the world are you doing!?
VIPPERs seem to take every bait that is thrown at them... but they're actually quite picky about the taste.
That is VIP QUALITY.
＿＿
,. -''""~ ~`''丶､、
,. '~ ﾉし ＿ ヽ
⌒`- 、 ⌒ <"~◎~"> `、
) `‐-‐ ' i
⌒) っ っ っ っ 丿
ζ ε ）---νννννν '’
三三三三三三三三三三三三三三三三二-￣￣
三三三三三三三三三三三三三三二-
三三三三三三三三三三三三二-
三三三三三三三三三三二-
Typhoon
Good-for-nothing Man is hereｰｰｰ
You're the best. Keep 'em coming.
Dumbass━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━!!
So that's why you asked for something to talk about besides crabs in the threadw
By the way, take a pic of Miss Undie tomorrow and post it here, >>1
＿＿＿ AA
*～/▼ ■⊂ ・・ P < Moo
| ● ●.（＿∀）
U U￣￣U U
"......."
This is bad. Really bad! The worst atmosphere ever! It feels even worse because we're on the phone.
The last time it was this bad was when I had a fight with a friend over a game he'd borrowed from me...
"..............see you tomorrow then."
"Yeah."
"Well, then...
I suddenly felt like it'd be bad to let it end like that and said
"Wait!"
I hear how she brings the receiver she was about to put down back to her ear.
"Yes?"
"Err... good night!"
"...........................huh."
"Well, good night."
"Yes... Haha...(strained laugh) Good night."
I guess this is exactly why I don't have any friends...
Anyways, what am I gonna do tomorrow?
I lol'd.
Ohh! Awesomew
You're just a sitting duck to her.
>>1
If she tries to sell something to you, don't buy it. No matter what it is.
One of my friends said a part-time co-worker tried to make him join the Souka Gakkai. It happens all the time and you could be their next target. Watch out.
Just go to bed.
You're so bad at bringing up new topics, Molester.
.__
,.._,/ /〉＿＿＿＿＿＿＿__
./// //──∧__∧ ─::ｧ /|
/// //~~'~~（‐∀‐ ,）~~/ / .|
.///_// "'''"'''"'" / / |
//_《_》′─────‐ ' / ./
|￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣| /
| | ./
|＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿|/
rattle rattle rattle __
,.＿_＝≡/ /whack ＿＿__
.// ＝≡/ /∧__∧:─::ｧ /|
// ＝≡/ / i#) ∀ ） ~/ / .|
.// ＝≡/_/ /"'"'"'"" / / |
// ＝≡〈,'/〉ﾞ:───‐' / ./ That too is VIP QUALITY.
|￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣| /http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
| | /
|＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿|/
Guess I must be in VIP.
Sorry.
You didn't want a normal cow, did you?
I know this isn't an AA thread, but can I have a Gesho one?
"I got crab delivered to me... and I don't know how to prepare it..."
Did you really think she wanted advice on something like that?w
Though it may have just been that Glasses is easy to talk to.
Miss Undie, on the other hand, doesn't seem to have any sympathy left for Molester.
She just says what she wants to say and doesn't seem to give a damn about what he thinks.
I wouldn't dress up tomorrow because she might take it the wrong way.
Go in the Uniqlo and Shimamura clothes you always wear.
I say something strange → Miss Understanding is like WTF → The end.
This pattern kept repeating throughout the phone call.
By the way, what's going to happen tomorrow? Didn't she say she's booked when I asked her out for tomorrow?
More importantly, I need to quickly find someone to switch shifts withw
Gesho
ﾄ､ ＿＿_
丶｀丶‐--‐ ',. '´￣丶::::｀丶、
＼:::::::::::::::! ・ l::::::::::: 丶
｀丶､:::::ヽ､＿__,ノ:::::::::::::::::::＼
＼ ｀ ｰ---_ァ:::::::::::::::::::::::::::ヽ
｀丶＝==ﾆ ､::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::ヽ
｀┐ _,.＞､:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::ヽ
￣ l::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::ヽ
/:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::＼
Don't forget to go wearing sneakers tomorrow.
If things get dangerous, make a run for it...
Whatever she wants advice on, it's important enough to warrant meeting with you for it. What could it be?
／￣￣￣｀ヽ、
/ ヽ
/ ／ ＼ │
| （彡） （ ミ）||| |
＼ | //￣⌒￣ヽヽ | That crab talk at the end of the phone call...
Sigh... | | .ｌ~￣~ヽ | |
／ | ヽ ￣~￣ ﾉ |
| ￣￣∪ |
Even if she claims she can predict the future
don't buy anything off her!
Holy shit!!
I like this one.
>>554
You don't have the slightest clue what she wants to talk to you about tomorrow?
Take your signature seal with you.
See it through to the end, >>1!
Ohhhhhhhhh!!
You're a gentleman and a scholar.
Thanks.
"That guy's been posting about you on VIP."
What if Glasses made a move on her again?
Maybe it's what she wants to talk to you about.
So these AA's are from Space Family Carlvinson? The name rings a bell, but I can't place it.
(((( ；ﾟДﾟ))) shake shake
How are we supposed to give you any advice if we don't know anything about your wishes and goals?
Even if she didn't set you up from the beginning, she might have spontaneously set her sights on you when she saw that you're easy game for her.
Isn't it wiser to expect the worst?
（・∀・）
>>537
_, ._
（ ﾟ Дﾟ）
Yeah, they are...
I like you for realizing it's Carlvinson despite my typo.
It doesn't have to be a set-up.
What if she was like
"I got to know someone in a rather strange way, but he seems like a perfect target, so why not?"
And what if she came up with it today?
She's trying to take advantage of your half-baked goodwill.
You have lunch with the woman who mistook you for a molester, tell her you're not mad at her without a care in the world, then stay in contact with her and ask her when you can meet her again.
It's like you're asking for it, man.
Then I'd want Miss Undie to join us as a new contender for the prettiest tripfag on 2ch.
Is he one of those crab people in Dynamite Cop or what!?
Fuck, I had to imagine it.
Leave it to me.
I always had an A in Japanese.
Also, I have this feeling something is happening behind your back, OP....
You might be in for a bad surprise tomorrow.
Made me crack up.
I was looking forward to tomorrow until a little while ago, you know? But now I'm getting cold feet.
Come on, don't be like thatw
It was just a little misunderstanding on my part.
Make sure to plug your hole up before you go.
If she wants advice on Glasses being too persistent, try to be a good listener.
70% listening and 30% talking, okay?
But if it's just some strange pot or an invitation to a cult, scream "VIP QUALITY RULES THE WORLD!!" and get the fuck out of there.
I knew it. Thought it was strange...
We got married in this thread, but you suddenly started saying you're late to the party today.
First of all, what do you wanna do with the woman?
Spill the beans already.
→ Wanted to meet him so bad that he asked Miss Undie to call him over →
→ >>1 goes to the family restaurant → Miss Undie says "We can't talk here. Let's go outside." →
→ They go into a back alley → Miss Undie starts acting nervously → >>1 gets excited, but Glasses is standing there butt naked →
→ Goodbye, >>1's virginity. Goodbye, good and honest life.
il||li _|￣|● il||li
Don't laughw
I got all volumes of Carlvinson at home!
Do it with a huge smile on your facew
Can't stop your imagination from running wildwwww
Yeah, I wanna spill my beans on her if you know what I mean!!
Ohh, you actually believe me...
It's happened twice so far and both times everyone thought I was samefagging... Though I guess it's a natural reaction.
（ ；´Д｀） ∩ヾ ／
/ .. .二二二ﾉ ＜ Wait, that's VIP QUALITY???
／ ＼＼ﾉ ∩)) ＼
/ ヾ.二二ノ ￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
(( （ _...彳
＼＼＼＼ヾ Too scary for me...
> ） > ）))
// / /
// // .
(__つ(__つ
Hey, watch what you're saying!
When I was asked to join a cult, I told them I need to go to the toilet and bolted out.
Wish they'd return the taxi fees though.
They dragged me to a different prefecture for that shit.
Don't come complaining if she cuts her wrists on you.
∧＿∧ +
（0ﾟ・∀・） ba-dump ba-dump shine shine
（0ﾟ∪ ∪ + looking forward to tomorrow
と＿_）__） +
Seriously. Do it.
You deserve a smack for that. Anyways, I'm out.
I'll be looking forward to tomorrow.
Your ID looked like ViP
for a moment there. or----z
I believe you because the same thing happened to me a few times.
Btw, the reason my ID changed earlier today is because I came home from work and I'm on my home computer now.
Souka.
Do as you promised and meet up with her.
It's obvious what you're supposed to dow
Go meet her!
Listen to what she has to say first.
Here goes a serious reply before I go to bed.
When you meet her tomorrow, tell her the following before you part ways:
"By the way, I'm sorry for suddenly asking you about crabs yesterday. The truth is, Mr. Glasses sent me some as a token of apology.
So, would you like to have crab together with me?"
(Another option is to ask her if she wants to take a crab home with her since it's too much for you alone)
Whichever it is, you'll have an excuse to meet Miss Undie again.
Depending on what it is she wants advice on, react accordingly and give her appropriate advice.
Take the signature seal you use for bank transactions with you.
First of all, equip yourself with an empty crab shell and a recording device.
Record yourself screaming "That is VIP QUALITY!" and post it here for laughs and giggles.
All you can do is be extra careful and hear her out.
Put the crab you got left in the freezer for starters.
Read this.
ttp://www6.plala.or.jp/pato/numeri/text21.htm
Well, you'll meet Miss Undie when her shift is over tomorrow, so why don't you have a crab hot pot with her?
Seats with obstacles around them that block your sight are dangerous too.
Oh yeah, report everything live with your cell phone.
This would be the greatest ending for a VIP threadwww
>>1
Hang in there, OP. I expect great things from you tomorrow.
Which isn't surprising at all if you think about it calmly.
Yet she keeps doing stuff like saying yes when you ask her out for lunch and wanting your advice on something. It's just fishy, you know?
In any case, it won't hurt to be on guard tomorrow.
Am I right in the assumption that you'll cut ties with her if it really turns out to be an invitation to the Souka Gakkai?
Well, in any case, it looks like I'll be able to have crab paste everyday for the next few days. What a feast.
| ||☆＼
| ||:*: :o|＼
￣||￣￣|| | ||:::ﾟ:::: |☆＼
|| || ＿＿＿＿＿＿|__ ||::☆: |:*:::o||
□||□ || |._. ._. ._. .(⌒─⌒) ＼::::ﾟ::|:::ﾟ::::: ||
|| || |＼＿___（(´・ω・`)） ＼__＼.|:☆::.||
＿||＿＿|| | |＼＿_￣￣￣￣＼ ＼ :ｏ. . ||
二0二二||￣＼|∫＼ ￣￣￣￣￣￣＼.. ＼||
＼ヾ ＼ ＼
＼ ||~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~||
I'm going to bed. See ya tomorrow.
No, he'll bring her back to her senses and get her out of there. For he's a hero of justice.
What the hell is "naver"!? I need to calm downw
I don't think I'll be here to join the party... orz
Please post your report in the evening.
Getting her out is pretty much impossible.
I know because my girlfriend is in Souka... She'd be perfect if it wasn't for that.
Being a follower of Souka is often a family thing, so OP might end up being the one who gets persuaded to joinww
You might need it to tie a crab up with.
Why are you bumping the thread after you just saged in >>639?w
Are you two different people with the same ID again?
（ ･ω･）
＿| ⊃／(＿＿_
／ └-(＿＿＿_／
￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
＜⌒／ヽ-、_＿_
／＜_/＿＿＿＿／
Haven't had any crab lately...
So you're saying, if it's just about dating Miss Understanding, it doesn't make a difference if she's in the Souka or not?
Sorry, it's just me being retardedw
My browser has sage checked by default and I forgot to uncheck it.
A senior at my school said his parents are Souka Gakkai followers.
They nag him about chanting some phrase every morning.
But well, he doesn't give a damn and just ignores them.
Just read all of it. It was fun.
This strategy doesn't work against bigger and more organized religious groups though.
You see, I got married to some guy who happened to have the same ID as you yesterday.
I wonder, will he have the same ID again when he comes back?
Some sort of prayer, I guess?
I'm not an expert, but isn't it something like a sutra?
That makes sense. Thanks.
>>499
>"if you tell a waiter my name, they will offer you a table in a corner..."
Here we go, guys.
Senior is a cool guy!! (･∀･)
The last times I had the same ID as someone else, I talked to them about it and it turned out we had the same Internet provider.
So, all posts above >>126 with this ID weren't from me, but we probably have the same provider which makes same IPs possible, or so I heard.
>>Whoever has the same ID as me
I'm sure this won't be the last time it happens, so let's try to get along.
Holy shit, you're right. Why did I not see this sooner?w
Google says it's the Lotus sutra the Soka people chant.
Whoever said it's a sutra was right.
Google says it's the Lotus sutra the Soka people chant.
Whoever said it's a sutra was right.
This is smelling more and more like a pyramid scheme...
Sorry. OTL
Well, if you think about it very positively, you could interpret it like this:
She works there, so if you tell her name to one of the waiters, they'll take you to a quiet table in a corner where you can talk in peace.
"Molester Man -Crying out VIP QUALITY in the corner of a family restaurant-"
Maybe it's the same person this time too.
But hey, then you can switch to the Crabses route.
/ |'''' |::::://O//| /
＼ |‐┐ |::://O/ ノ ヾ､/
＿ |__」 |/ヾ. ／ ／
／ ＼ ヽ___ﾉ ／ . へ、,／
＼ ／ / { く ／
＼ ＼ !､.ノ `ー''"
＼ ＼ //
| ＼ ＼ﾞ′
＼ | ＼ That is VIP QUALITY.
＼ | http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
＼|
Maybe... But I had the feeling it was 2 different people.
In other words, there might be 3 other people with this IDw
Which only leaves the following possibilities:
- It's about Glasses
- She drags you to the police again
- She suddenly sues you
- She apologizes properly for the last time and cuts ties with you
- She asks you to delete her number and e-mail addy because you're creeping her out (in a very small voice)
Also possible, an invitation to a religious sect and a scamming attempt.
Anything else is unthinkable.
You have to keep in mind that she's mentally unstable though.... Her actions don't have to make sense....
They have small children chanting the lotus sutra as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
My family quit though, so now it's almost like we severed ties with our relatives.
You forgot one important possibility.
She suddenly... gives him a kiss.
- It's about Glasses
400 Crabses that it's this one.
Since she's mentally unstable, I can see that happening...
What's OP gonna do if she's waiting for him wearing cat ears!?
Well yeah, but if you think about it very negatively, the whole family restaurant might be involved in it.
As soon as OP tells her name to a waiter, he'll be caught in their trap. (((( ；ﾟДﾟ))) shake shake
You lucky bastardw
Get a fucking job!
･ﾟ･(つД`)･ﾟ･
But then again, I'm not any better. I got a job and I'm still hanging out on VIP this late....... orz
Post a pic of it.
You ungrateful son of a bitch.
We're discussing every possible scenario because we're worried about you and you? You're eating crabw
With some imagination, it kinda looks like crab. I guess it'll have to do for now... orz
So we can exclude the following two:
"Love confession to Molester Man"
"Invitation to a religious sect or a pyramid scheme"
We've seen how mentally unstable she is. Maybe she doesn't have any close friends?
Don't drink too much. You don't wanna be late tomorrow.
That means, it must be about Glasses after all, huh?
There's still tomorrow.
And it looks like the real party will happen tomorrow.
Seriously didn't expect this thread to be so unpredictable.
Good night, everyone.
>>1
Hang in there tomorrow!!
I guess you're right.
I'll make sure to be here tomorrow.
>>1 Don't you let our advice go to wastew
She's not the brightest bulb in the box, is she? What if she just doesn't give it any thought?
Or all her colleagues know she's in a religious cult and they accept it to a certain degree.
Glasses kept calling (and e-mailing) Miss Understanding frequently,
while Molester Man only replied when she wrote him something.
She must have chosen >>1 because he's a better listener.
Plus, he seems more broad-minded than Glasses. Even if she were to do mean things to him once or twice, be it on purpose or not, he could probably just laugh it off.
Also, she's picked him up once and even told him where she works, so I don't think she suspects him of being a stalker anymore.
I really wonder what it could be.
"I'm sorry... Please don't contact me anymore. (in quite a loud voice)"
We can't exclude this possibility.
If this happens, I hope OP gives her a piece of his mind before he comes back.
Because I know that you have the social skills for a fun conversation when you're not freaking out.
I'm pretty sure I'll be here all day during work tomorrow!
If it's something I know, I'll gladly help!
So if you need a woman's perspective on it, I'll be your backup.
Don't change the title for the next thread so people like me can find it easily.
I'm out.
>>1
You couldn't care less about what we think, could you?w
Hang in there, you working member of society!
Good night.
Didn't expect it to turn out as it did either.
Besides, the new day's only just started, I still have a lot of time.
We had two big events today, crab from Glasses and pyramid scheme suspicions.
I wish Molester would post before the thread dies for a change thoughw
You should have enough time to write something like "dinnerwhere help", at least!
I'm the one who posted >>716, but it's probably not a good idea to fiddle around with your cell phone when you're talking to Miss Undie.
Oh, so you were around?w
Seriously now, be careful tomorrow.
If she wants advice on something normal, try to be a good listener and don't say anything that would dishearten her.
Women seeking advice often already know the solution to their problem themselves, so all you gotta do is drag it out of them.
Not by persuading them with reasoning though, it's more effective to ask them what is most important for them and make them realize themselves.
HAHAHA I'm still here. And I'll be here all night!!
At least, until I've seen this week's Gankutsuou.
We told you in the previous thread to ask her about crab in person.
Why would you suddenly do it on the phone when you weren't even having small talk?
Now it'll be even more difficult to bring up the crabs again.
There's no need to worry about that imo.
Seems like she did the talking the whole time last time and he was the listener.
"So what did you want to ask me about?"
immediately after meeting her,
so let's try to come up with small talk topics.
Listening to someone isn't the same as being unable to say anything thoughw
Yeah, but... she's mentally unstable.... she might not have noticed the difference...
Maybe Glasses wanted to apologize to Miss Understanding too and send her crab just like he did in OP's case.
So he asks her about her address → Miss Understanding gets suspicious → Thinks he's a stalker → Wants to talk to Molester Man about it
You're smart.
That could be it.
〒 ! + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
+ 。 | |
＊ + / / Yeeeeeehaaaaaawwww!
∧＿∧ / /
（´∀｀ / / + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
,- ｆ
/ ｭﾍ | ＊ + 。 + 。 +
〈＿｝ ） |
/ ! + 。 + + ＊
./ ,ﾍ |
bang ||| j / | | |||
――――――――――――
What's wrong?
No, what's wrong with you? Why are you still around at this hour?w
Nothing in particular... But why is my heart beating so fast!?
Yeah, what's there to be so excited about this late?w
It's after midnight, so try not to make so much noise the next time you stand up.
Okay, I'm going to bed. Night.
Good night to you too, Molester.
Good night.
Night.
I'm going to sleep in a bit too.
Why don't you fap to your wife?
|（ ＾＾ ）| < I'm going to bed!（＾＾）
|＼⌒⌒⌒＼
＼ |⌒⌒⌒~| Yamazaki Wataru
~￣￣￣￣
ttp://vipper.zive.net/vip/img/vip096.jpg
Morning, guys.
ttp://vipper.zive.net/vip/img/vip101.jpg
This thread is going so fast, it's going to be long dead when I come home later today...
If it reaches 1000 posts, someone please save a copy of it. Thanks.
With the family restaurant event today, it'll definitely reach >>1000 today...
But don't worry, I'm sure you'll have more than enough copies of the thread waiting for you tonight.
Tell us how you feel about today's event before you go.
When he understood that it was just another one of Miss Understanding's misunderstandings, he must have felt like apologizing to Molester really bad...
The reason he sent crab was so that OP can't send it back.
What an earnest and nice guy.
I'm almost 100% certain that it's going to be something completely unexpected.
But never mind that. The most important thing today is to establish something that connects me to her, either before she starts talking about her problem OR after we're done.
Something that allows me to remain in casual e-mail contact with her.
What kind of gear and equipment will you be wearing today?
Describe it using an AA.
If it's some sort of invitation though, you should be able to cut ties with her without hesitation.
But if she really wants your advice, it means she trusts you enough to take advice from you.
In that case, anything's possible, from writing e-mails to going on dates with her. We'll know which it is today... Hang in there.
┏ ┓ brown hair
cardigan ∧＿∧ ／￣￣￣￣￣￣
￣￣￣￣＼（ ´∀｀）
Air Force 1 （ ） Levi's jeans
￣￣￣￣￣＼｜ ｜ | ／￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
（_＿）＿）
┗ ┛
beep beep beep...
Upper body: A white T-shirt that has "happiness" written on it for some reason + a cardigan over it
Lower body: Levi's jeans + Air force 1 shoes
I could be wrong, but I think it's a very normal outfit.
By the way, I heard you can become the target of scorn for some people just by wearing Uniqlo stuff (plus Uniqlo is famous),
so I'm not wearing anything Uniqlo this time, except for my wallet.
I've been wearing them often lately.
I took today off from work just so I can take part in the party.
Your 2channer spirit gave me a boner.
Do you have your CV with you?
And don't forget your signature seal.
I came from Lounge, but I'll be rooting for you.
Hang in there, Molester.
| |_| |
ヽ(・∀・ )ﾉ ＜Go back to Lounge! Shoo! Shoo!
（ ）O
OO ⌒Ｙ⌒Ｙ⌒Ｙ⌒Ｙ⌒Ｙ⌒Ｙ Boing! Boing!
I pray to God that your Air Force 1's aren't white.
White ones only make you look more like an otaku.
I guess the Levi's jeans are okay, but what color is the cardigan?
Let's ignore the material and the design for now, but make sure the overall color scheme of your outfit isn't weird.
It's all about picking the right color scheme.
1. She wants to sell some strange pot to him.
2. She needs people for a competitive exhibition of some sort.
3. She just wants to kill time.
4. She likes Molester Man.
Easy. I bet 300 slimy egg crabs that it's 1.
This guy stinks! He stinks like the bad troll he is...
End this shitty rehash.
Copypasta from the first thread:
488 Name:VIPPER [] Date:04/11/06 07:47:06 ID:n+KzzlKV
Most of you aren't even VIPPERs, are you?
Letting yourself get trolled knowing it's a troll and devouring every shit that is served to you is VIP QUALITY, isn't it?
What's with you all pointing out the obvious and going all "It's fake! I can tell!" for? Shut up and play along.
／,.ｧ､＼
( ﾉo o ) ） Blow (Get)
)ヽ ◎/(. Up (A)
（／.(･)(･)＼ . Wife (Clue)
（／| x |＼）
／／＼＼
. （／ ＼）
Hurry up and come back!
('◇'*) Eh!? Me!?
I was like "Who's 9 metres?" for a second.
In b4 someone starts a thread about a 9-metre tall guy.
Still comparing OP to Train Man after all what's happened, huh...
You're slowpoking so hard I don't know what to say.
Except lurk moarw
>>784
I completely agree with that post.
I posted yesterday that I won't be able to take part in the party because of work, but my curiosity got the better of me and I came backw
Now I'm watching the thread from my office computer.
No news is good news. Or so I hope.
What if he's sitting at a table in a corner of the family restaurant, surrounded by a group of people and unable to go home?w
All he gotta do is post "Help I'm in deep shit" from his cell phone and I'd go get him out of the mess.
No clue which family restaurant it is though.
VIP and Lounge both have shitty threads all the time and might look the same to an untrained eye at first glance,
but once you've lurked for a while, you realize they're like worlds apart.
Yeah, worlds apart in terms of QUALITY.
I missed it...
"If this thread has exactly 950 posts by 3pm, I'll post my tits."
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/entrance/1100060854/
"Tits! Tits!"
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/entrance/1100065766/
"[Sorry the thread got more than 950 posts] Post your tits anyway! [Please]"
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/entrance/1100065904/
Speaking of which, it's about time he comes back...
OP treats her to lunch → She sends him an e-mail later → They agree to meet up this weekend → OP gets crab delivered from Glasses → She suddenly e-mails him and says she wants to meet him today
→ We're waiting for his return now
I lol'd because it's just like VIP to get so carried away because of TITS that they don't get any TITS in the end.
Maybe these will make you guys feel better:
http://www2u.biglobe.ne.jp/~k-saka/img_get/2004ass11/2004-11-9-IMG_GET-18-46-21.jpg
http://violet.homeip.net/upload/img-box/img20041109122022.jpg
Thanks.
I'm reading this thread in a 2ch browser.
1. There's some red mark on the left of the post titles.
2. The post numbers and the posts don't seem to match.
I thought it was some kind of a joke first, but it has to be a bug.
What is going on?
It's probably because post 270 got deleted.
Refresh the thread log.
Thanks.
>Sorry for going off-topic, but I need help.
>I'm reading this thread in a 2ch browser.
This post, for example, gets shown as post 813...
>>816 How do I refresh the log?
Delete the old log → Open the thread again
The correct post number is 815.
I don't know which 2ch browser you're using, but there should be an option to "discard the log"?
Once you've done that, get the newest log by following this URL:
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099999070/
There should be a recycle bin icon with an arrow on it right next to it.
>>819
>>820
>>821
Thanks, guys.
Works perfectly now!
VIP is the only place where the users are kind enough to help you out like this.
Thanks for the trouble.
I checked again and there was the option to "discard and refresh the log".
So you don't have to go through the trouble of entering the URL every time.
(Dunno if your 2ch browser has the function thoughw)
In any case, I'm glad you were able to fix it.
Should I sage too when I post?
So far, I was like "We're in VIP, no one cares!", but if you guys think it's better to sage, I will.
Though, even if we asked everyone to sage in the first post of the next thread, VIPPERs probably wouldn't do as told anywayw
You're right.
I'll quit worrying about it.
If you wanna sage, sage. And if you wanna bump, bump.
I'd almost forgotten what it means to be a VIPPER.
Close call.
（ ･ω･）
＿| ⊃／(＿＿_
／ └-(＿＿＿_／
￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
∧∧ grab
（ ･ω･）
Σ⊂彡_,,..i'"':
|＼`､: i'､
＼＼`_',..-i
＼|_,..-┘
＜⌒／ヽ-、_＿_ fap fap That is VIP QUALITY.
／＜_/＿＿＿＿／ http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
If you wanna sage, you write sage into the e-mail field, right?
Then, if you wanna bump instead, you have to do this!
I'm off to the barber.
Later, guys.
Later.
OP's probably gonna come back while you're at the barber though.
Guess I might get to meet a VIPPER soon.
∧＿∧ +
（0ﾟ・∀・） ba-dump ba-dump shine shine
（0ﾟ∪ ∪ +
と＿_）__） +
Who's the girl in the top picture? She's just my type.
Did he really get locked up in a basement?
Why is he taking so long!?
Is he duking it out with a religious cult? Or are things actually going well for him?
Because if he didn't, he might have gone to work directly after the meeting, no?
He got CRAB. (from a guy)
A moving 2ch story that might just surpass Train Man...
MOLESTER MAN
The best thread on News Flash VIP right now.
VIP QUALITY over PURE LOVE.
, ', -､ヽ'´ ｀'´, -､ヽ
! { / ﾞ } i
ヽ｀ｰ,' ● ＿ ● ﾞｰ'ノ ALWAYS SOMETHING
｀ ! , '´ ▼ ヽ l" BEAR━━♪
/ ｀ヽ i 人 i ﾉ ヽ
ヽ./ ｀＝=ｧ'⌒ヽ=＝' ヽ/
ヽ, {(＾) } 〈
! ヽ!l__,ノ ﾞ
ｌ i
／´ ﾉ `ヽ､
/ ''''' / ''''' ヽ
i′（●）, ､（●）､ . ',
{ ,,ﾉ(､_, )ヽ､,, .::::}
', ｀-=ﾆ=- ' :::::::,!
＿__ヽ ｀ﾆﾆ´ .:::::丿_＿,,
, ゝ ｀ヽ､ ／´ く _
＜-‐''´ ￣￣｀,ゝ､､＿__,,, ＜´￣￣｀ ー-＞
｀ ｰ''´Z＿ノ ヽ､＿ヾ ｰ ´
Ah, it's of course okay if you have 1's consent or he really has molested someone in the past.
Now I can read the thread live.
Good job.
There wasn't much to catch up on today though, was there?w
That is VIP QUALITY.
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump shine shine
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
I was sick of watching the thread from my cell phone, worried that I miss out on something.
Was >>1 supposed to work a night shift?
If we assume he went to work, when will he return? Sometime around 10 pm?
It took me quite long because I read slowly.
The day they went to the police station, he returned a little before 11 pm.
Looks like we'll have to wait until then today too.
Why do women always have to do things you wouldn't expect in your wildest dreams?
It was the same in elementary, middle and high school. Though I never had much to do with women in any of my school years.
OP is here!
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） beear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
,,.-''" r _､ 三三ヽ."
／ i {ぃ}} _ﾆﾆ三ﾞ､
/,.､ `--" 二三三； _,,. -'''"
ｌ {ゞ} i _ﾆ三三| _,..-'''"
.l `" i_,,...-''| ニ三三!''"
_,.-! ! i -ﾆ三三/
l´,.- l ＼/ -ﾆ三三／
_. ! ｒi l＼ __--三三三='"
j'‘´j `´ | ! ` ミ三三三三三＝''"
i',.. '´} | |
l,.. r´ '´
∧＿∧ +
（0ﾟ・∀・） ba-dump ba-dump shine shine
（0ﾟ∪ ∪ +
と＿_）__） +
I got too excited and downed quite a lot of sake yesterday even though I can't really handle alcohol.
Plus, I had too much crab soup after I had a full dinner, so I woke up with bad head and stomach ache this morning.
Σ(ﾟдﾟ) Wait!! Was this part of Glasses' evil scheme all along!?
Of course not. Anyways, I drank some digestive medicine and headed out.
On my way to the family restaurant, I bought Cabagin-U at a convenience store and drank it too.
Ugh. Tastes like cabbage. Guess the rumor that Cabagin-U is called Cabagin-U because it tastes like cabbage was true after all.
I decided to walk to the family restaurant. The reason being that if I rode my bicycle, I'd stay cool thanks to the wind while I'm riding the bicycle, but as soon as I get off, there'd be no wind to cool me anymore and I'd suddenly start sweating like crazy.
And I sweat easily to begin with.
It'd be a disaster if I were to enter the family restaurant out of breath, sweating like a pig and said "Miss Understanding asked me to come here...".
Just imagine what they'd think if I asked "I'm sorry, could I use the restroom?".
They're guaranteed to think I went for a quick wank because I got too horny.
For starters, I'm glad you made it back!
Well, have a cup of tea first and take your time to tell us what happened.
つ旦~
You should've gotten Xylitol gum instead of Cabagin-U.
How many times do you think I've reloaded this thread since this morning?
Glad you're back though.
/ ´_ゝ`） Oh, thanks a lot for the tea.
| /
と＿_）__） 旦
And got there at 11:45, earlier than planned.
As I'm a coward, I took a peek through the windows first... The restaurant was pretty packed for a weekday, probably because it was lunchtime.
Just when I was thinking "I might get in the way of her work if I go in now.", I found Miss Understanding!!
Hmm... Is this a uniform I see before me? Very nice. The skirt could be a little longer though.
Seeing how she was still working, I guessed her shift will really end at 12. So I thought I better wait till 12.
Which turned out to be a mistake.
12:00
Peeking through the windows, I could see Miss Understanding was still working. The place wasn't as packed as before, but there were still quite a few customers.
I might get in the way if I go in now, I should wait a little longer... or so I figured.
12:10
She was still working. I wondered if they were short on waitresses or something. Either way, I figured I'd just be in the way etc.
Hey, that cup of tea wasn't for you!!!
She was still working. The number of customers hadn't changed, but there was one more waitress. I guessed they really were short on waitresses.
But I was supposed to meet her 20 minutes ago.
I might be in the way, but I couldn't wait any longer.
According to my research, one of the top reasons for why men get rejected by women, if you ignore looks, is "Tardiness".
Making her wait any longer would be bad. A classic case of putting the cart before the horse.
So I steeled myself and went in.
It was a short, big-busted waitress. I'm sorry, but your two bombs aren't going to work against a guy like me whose motto is "Girls under 16 are the best!".
Well, they're pretty impressive for a girl your size, I'll give you that... but you've picked the wrong guy to pick a fight with.
"No... err... Miss Understanding asked me to come here..."
"Huh? Miss Understanding did?"
It seemed like she hadn't heard anything about it. With one hand at her waist, she looked like she was pondering over something for a while.
"Umm... Didn't she tell you about me?"
"Uhh... Please wait a little."
the loli with the jugs said before she went into the kitchen. After a few seconds, a different waitress came to me.
"Yes, yes, she told me you'd come. This way, please!!"
One of her friends, maybe? She was, you know, one of those Kansai girls. Certainly not my type.
Having given her a bad rating right off the bat, I was led to a seat in the back and left there to wait. But real men don't get flustered no matter what happens.
Without anyone noticing, I wiped my face with the wet towel at my seat. I'd sweated a lot on the way because of the stomach ache and it felt good to wipe it all off.
Then, Miss Understanding came.
The short, big-busted girl is moew
The Kansai girl is moew
Please introduce me to the Kansai girl.
It's settled. Let's have an offline meeting at the family restaurantw
It was a very neat and tidy, black and white outfit. I personally found that it didn't look very good on her.
"Sorry for that! I hadn't told Miss XX about it..."
"Huh? Ahh... Miss XX? You mean the short waitress from a little while ago?"
"Yes. I was expecting you at 12, Mr. Molester..."
"Ah... I'm sorry. Actually, I arrived a little earlier, but then I saw you working and..."
"Eh?"
Damn, it sounded like an excuse. Real men don't make excuses.
"I'm very sorry. You seemed so busy that I figured I'd just be in the way!"
"I see. You see, I had agreed I'd work until you arrive, Mr. Molester."
"Eh? Really!?"
I was amazed at my bad luck... I thought I was doing her a favor, but I only made her work longer.
So for her, I'm not only a molester who comes late, but also one who makes excuses.
Now, now, let's not try to predict the punchline too muchw
"Yes, I see. I'm truly sorry."
"No, no, please don't worry about it."
.......Suddenly our conversation had reached a dead end.
Yesterday, the committee inside my head had decided that it wouldn't be a good idea to ask "So, what did you want to talk about?" early on,
as there'd be no time for small talk anymore, but my plan had quickly reached an impasse.
I couldn't bring up the crab topic again, obviously.
What should I do... What should I do... Ahh, the silence! The silence!!
Hey, you. Yeah, I'm talking to you.
How is it? Isn't this thread fun?
But look, you're just reading the archive of this thread, not actually taking part in it.
Pfff. I feel bad for you, son.
I, on the other hand, am posting live in this thread right now.
It's a wonderful experience and I'll be able to brag about it all my life.
While slowpokes like you can't do anything but post "I was too late again today. orz" after everything's over.
"So, what did you want to talk about today?"
Unable to take the silence any longer, I ended up saying what I didn't want to say. OTL
"Eh? Err... I wanted your advice on something, but could you wait a little longer?"
"Hmm? I don't mind..."
I didn't understand what we were waiting for, but this was my chance. If she'd started talking, it'd all have been over, but she didn't...
Kinda like when you throw a wild pitch, but the base runners of the opposing team weren't paying attention and didn't run.
I needed to find a way to strike up a small talk with her.......
In b4 a trusted colleague of hers makes an appearance... But nah, probably not.
Molester wouldn't let something that predictable happen in his story.
"!? (Urk!)"
Dude, you're so smart.
"Ah, by the way, did you watch Bakatono?"
"Eh? Was it on?"
"Yeah, it was on TV yesterday."
"As a rerun?"
"Not a rerun. They show a new episode every now and then, didn't you know?"
"Really!? I thought the show had ended a long time ago..."
"Eh? But they make a special episode like every three months..."
"But aren't they just reruns too? All they do is show clips from older episodes, right?"
........It's useless. She doesn't understand what the show is all about. She doesn't get how fun running gags and returning skits can be!!
Looks like this topic won't go anywhere.
"You see, they're like remakes of older skits. No reruns."
"I see... I didn't know..."
"Well, just give it a try next time. It's fun."
I kept trying to make her talk to me in a more casual way, but it just wouldn't work out.
>>1
>>8 (needs some improvement)
>>9
>>11
>>128
>>129
"Thanks for waiting for me!"
What did SHE come for...
"Ah, Hello! I'm Kansai!"
"Eh? Huh? Ah, hello, I'm Molester?"
I didn't know how to deal with the unexpected turn of events. Someone, help me, please.
"You two have already met once, right, Mr. Molester? This is Kansai."
"Eh? You mean when I arrived here?"
"No, at the police station..."
"????????"
I didn't have a clue who she was. And I must have looked clueless too because she said:
"Don't remember me? At the police station, you know? On the day you got mistaken for a molester."
Ahh, right. I remember you, you little...
Keep in mind though that Molester never listens to others' opinions when it matters the most.
But it's also what makes him great.
I'm late, but welcome back, >>1
The same thing can be said about all women.
"Say, Miss Understanding, you've fallen for Molester Man, haven't you?"
Maybe OP just never told us about Kansai?
FYI, Molester is a guy.
He couldn't know that she'd play such an important role later on like this, could he?
And when it started to rain, she thought "Even if I scream now, no one will hear me!!" and started running as fast as she could.
Seeing that, I started running as fast as I could too thinking "I must run away from the molester!". But she was like "No, man, you are the molester.". And then I was a molester.
In the meantime, a woman, probably a good friend of hers, arrived. The police decided to call it a day and continue on some other day.
Glasses kept worrying about the woman until the end. They were just like Train Man and Hermes while I was like the drunk old guy.
The salaryman had already left before I noticed.
It's her, isn't it?
Sorry, I misunderstood. I thought >>917 was talking about Miss Undie.
GJ
Yes, I remembered... How she glared at me with scorn!!
"Ah... Yeah, right, we met there. How could I forget? (quite bluntly)"
"Ohh, you do remember, huh? I thought you'd have forgotten about me by now!"
Shut your mouth! I'd gladly forget about you if I could.
How can she act so overly familiar with someone she's talking to for the first time, anyway?
Oh, I know how. She must be a university student. A dirty, yellow slut that goes to mixers day after day.
I bet she's enjoying campus life to the fullest! Fuck!!
I was about to post the same thing. Good thing I refreshed the page before that.
GJ!!
GJ
gj
You sure don't go easy on girls you're not interested in.
GJ.
Right, OP did mention her. It had totally escaped me.
Quite impressive foreshadowing if you ask me.
I try to be cheerful too when I meet someone for the first time.
Leaves a better first impression.
You're a university student, you should try to be more like her too.
There, I fixed it for you.
You are too.
Oh shit!
GJ
Thanks in advance for the next thread.
I'll go make the new thread.
".......I'm sorry."
Miss Understanding apologizes all of a sudden. And my blood runs cold.
"No, don't get me wrong! I'm not holding anything against you!!"
"Huh, very interesting."
What's so interesting, you bitch...
Only a few minutes had passed since she joined us and I was already so annoyed at the Kansai girl I could scream. Well, she's not really from Kansai though.
I just can't get along with people like her. Even back when I still had friends, I used to dislike this type of girls.
I bet she was class representative in grade school and said stuff like "Teacher! Molester is scribbling in a library book!!".
Fuck!
You had me rolling thereww
I wanna chase after that girl... (*´Д`) pant pant
You know, you're really rotten to the core. But that's what I like about you.
At that time, I still thought Kansai was just passing our table out of curiosity.
I figured if I quickly got to the main topic, Kansai would leave the scene. But it was a big mistake.
"Ahh! That's right!"
Shut the fuck up. I didn't ask you.
"Come on, Miss Understanding. You want Mr. Molester's advice, right?"
"Yeah... Mr. Molester, umm... but I wouldn't want to trouble you..."
"No, don't worry, you're not. I wouldn't have come all the way here if I found it troubling."
I tried to say it in my most soothing voice.
Pant pant.
Oh God, what happens next!? WHAT HAPPENS NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEXT
I'd pee my pants.
She said she doesn't want to trouble him... I think we can rule that one out.
Ahh, you're right...
I bet 3000 Gavas on it.
Thanks!
"Alright... Where to start..."
And so she started talking.
I can't write everything she said, so let me sum it up briefly...
It seems like Miss Understanding has been the victim of severe stalking for more than half a year(?) now.
Maybe it was because Kansai was sitting right next to her, but unlike last time, Miss Understanding told me about it all in great detail.
Frankly speaking, some of it made me so frisky it gave me a raging bon- Err... I mean it made me rage with anger.
And about two months(?) ago, she decided to ask the police for help.
At first, the police didn't really believe her and were hesitant to act, but when she'd overcome her embarrassment and gave them a detailed description of what the stalker had done to her,
they reluctantly started patrolling the area and keeping watch on her residence.
As soon as the police got involved, the stalker made himself scarce, lulling her into a false sense of security.
They have a threesome in the family restaurant.
An unexpected twist!! Miss Undie is moe!
Whoa, she let you in on all that? That means, you must have gained her trust, man.
Therefore, she asks Molester to act like her boyfriend to make him give up.
She's had it tough.
I feel like you're not the only one in this thread with that ID.
is her excuse, huh!?
Also, 1000.
＿ -─__ﾆﾆ, ￣ , ─; / ///
＿. --─__￢ ,ﾆﾆ､ -‐ / ￣ __/ / /__ ,-─ ' _ノノ/
/,.-‐─ ￣ // // /‐ 7 / /￣ ＿/＿'-- ; ///´
. //_. -─￢ // // / / / ￣/ / / ﾉ / ///
'-‐, r‐￢_/ // // / / /__ ,-‐' / ＿ 二´ / ///
// ´ ノ '-─'/ /厂 //＿__ノ / / '--‐'//
_// ,-‐ ´_, ,-─' //--_－ニ´--- ─ ' ´￣￣´
. //~ //￣ // ノ,/￣
// // / '--‐_´／
/ --‐_'ノ ￣￣
´￣ NO FUCKING WAY
Also, could it be that the stalker returned around the time when Glasses got involved in this...?
〒 ! + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
+ 。 | |
＊ + / / Yeeeeeehaaaaaawwww!
∧＿∧ / /
（´∀｀ / / + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
,- ｆ
/ ｭﾍ | ＊ + 。 + 。 + This thread has reached 1000 posts.
〈＿｝ ） | The next thread too will have... VIP QUALITY!!
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./ ,ﾍ |
bang ||| j / | | |||
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