The other day, I was totally mistaken for a molester.
And I don't mean it as a joke, I was actually mistaken for one in the blink of an eye.
Like "FUCK YOU! WHY IS EVERYONE MESSING WITH ME! IMMA MURDER EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU AHHHHHHHHHH
>I was rubbing my swollen meat against...
Did you think it's okay to touch a girl if it's with the back of your hand?
I don't know for how long we'd been walking along the same road, but when I casually looked ahead, there was this rather short woman walking in front of me.
Of course, I didn't particularly care and just kept on walking, but the woman in front of me kept glancing back over her shoulder nervously. Again and again.
I still didn't care until she took out her cell phone in a hurry.
Absentmindedly, I thought to myself "Does she have a stalker problem or something..?".
Now who would have thought that I was the "stalker"...
Sue her!
Even at that point, I was still calmly thinking stuff like "Ah... If some stalker attacked her now and I protected her like a gentleman, would I get my own happy ending like Train Man?".
Thinking back now, I was such an idiot it's embarrassing.
And then, it started raining.
I've suddenly lost all my interest.
(I forgot to mention that we were walking along one of those broad alleys and we had only taken a turn twice or three times until then.)
I didn't have an umbrella with me and seeing how she started running as soon as it started raining, she didn't seem to have one either.
But she was totally looking in my direction.
It was like her eyes were fixed on me.
I mean, she was even running while looking back over her shoulder! That was when I noticed something. What appeared to me as her leisurely trotting away was actually her sprinting at full speed...
Like she was running away from something, breathing heavily.
I was thinking "Don't tell me her stalker actually appeared!! This is bad... What if he thinks I'm her boyfriend and goes after me...".
That's when she screamed
"HELP!!"
at the top of her lungs.
You're to blame because you're a creep. Why don't you just die on the spot?
I seriously didn't get what was going on. I looked back several times, but there didn't seem to be anyone behind us.
I even asked myself, "Is she seeing things?".
But now that I had seen her, if I ignored her and something were to happen to her afterwards, I'd obviously be the one to blame and I'd feel bad for not helping her, so I ran after her to catch up to her.
And to be honest, I was getting a little scared myself.
"She must have mistaken me for a stalker...", I thought to myself.
At the same time, I remembered the special they had on TV about male passengers on crowded trains falsely accused of molesting.
Women are always in a superior position in that kind of cases and the police doesn't listen no matter what the guy says... or so I heard.
"This is yakui".
Unable to think anything else, I ran as fast as I could and caught up to her.
"Excuse me..."
"ASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM?!!!"
She collapsed and started crying with her legs kicking wildly.
There was no doubt about it. I was totally getting mistaken.
I don't know how many minutes passed, but I was starting to panic because if someone were to see us like that, it'd be game over for me.
So I grabbed hold of her shoulders tightly and strongly insisted "Would you quit screaming like that!? Come on, I'm begging you!!".
But of course, she didn't stop with just that. Thinking about it now, I feel like it would have been better if I had said something like "Shut the fuck up or I'll fuck you up!" instead.
"Hey, hey you!! What are you doing to her!?".
and roughly pulled me away from her.
"What's going on here? What's going on here?"
The glasses guy first asked me and then her, his eyes moving between her and me, trying to assess the situation.
Shut up already, asshole, I bet you already figured out who the criminal is, Sherlock, so quit asking. I'm sorry. Please try to understand.
I had gone from "I gotta do something! I gotta do something!" to "I'm done for." in a few seconds and wasn't able to say anything but "Ah... uh..." anymore.
Glasses didn't seem like the type that knows how to deal with such a situation and was raising a lot of dust without accomplishing anything.
After a while, a group of salaryman that seemed to be on their way home from a drinking party came along blabbering all kinds of things.
The most important-looking one out of the bunch who was obviously also the most experienced in life directly grasped the situation with one look (he was so wrong though) and said stuff like
"You... Are you even aware of what you've done!?"
or
"Go to the police and everything will be alright. You didn't do anything wrong."
or
"Are you alright, Mister, you're not injured or something?"
and was like the man of the situation. I remember thinking "That's the role I wanted to play".
http://life6.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/mental/1099399795
Her chest is as flat as her ass is! She's got a loli body with the round tummy and everything!
But this bishoujo looks like Mikitty with her fox/cat eyes.
Her personality takes after Mikitty too as she's very whimsical and moody, so treat her with care!
Let's make her drop her panties tonight!
http://life6.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/mental/1099233638 Archive
http://life6.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/utu/1099352666 Shelter
I just went with the flow and followed the group.
And soon I found myself on the way to the nearest police station together with Glasses, that woman and one of the salarymen.
The guy that looked like the leader had told him
"Go with them and tell the police what happened.".
The woman had calmed down by now and the police interviewed her in a separate room.
And me? As the suspect, I got special treatment too.
Just as I had feared, they didn't believe a word I said.
When I had finally calmed down and told them my side of the story as far as I remembered, I could tell from the look on the policeman's face that he was thinking it was just something I came up with on the spot.
He looked at me like "Spare me with all that and fess up already.".
Seeing the woman in the well-lit room I noticed she's pretty cute. At least she was before she cried her eyes out. Because of me. Although I didn't do anything wrong.
Glasses was like a completely different person now compared to before when he was all flustered and shook up.
He told them what happened crisply and clearly. I wouldn't go as far as calling him handsome, but he's the type of young man that looks good with stylish designer glasses.
As for me, I had no choice but to keep repeating what I had already said in the first interview. I mean, what was I supposed to do? It was the truth.
"I was on my way home when she suddenly started running and I ran after her because something seemed off, but she got it all wrong."
Of course, I told them about it in more detail, but it boils down to this.
Though this guy's story seems like it's made up.
You know, when you're waiting for a train and happen to stand behind one of those women and they keep looking at you weird like you're suspicious or something until they walk away?
I hate it when they do that, I haaaateeee ittt, they should just die die die dieeeeeeeee
"When I arrived at the scene, she was on her knees crying, while he was holding her by the shoulders and saying something to her..."
But I know what comes after the "...". It was so obvious that he wanted to say
"Well, if you ask me, I'm 80 to 90% sure that he's a stalker, molester and/or rapist!!"
After a while, the woman started talking with a teary voice. It seems, she's been the victim of a really bad stalker case that left her traumatized.
Which is why she panicked when I, although unintentionally, kept following her even though she tried to shake me off many times (only a few times actually).
Seeing that, I started running as fast as I could too thinking "I must run away from the molester!". But she was like "No, man, you are the molester.". And then I was a molester.
In the meantime, a woman, probably a good friend of hers, arrived. The police decided to call it a day and continue on some other day.
Glasses kept worrying about the woman until the end. They were just like Train Man and Hermes while I was like the drunk old guy.
The salaryman had already left before I noticed.
For starters, give us a description of what you look like.
OP gon get arrested.
This time, the woman and I both had calmed down, so we got straight to the point.
In cases like this, women often refuse to admit their fault and instead try to lay the blame on the male suspects with lies and false accusations, or so I had heard.
However, she was different.
"You didn't really do anything to me, but I can't be sure that you're not a stalker just yet".
is what she told me.
In return, I explained to her what actually happened in an easy-to-understand way.
Glasses' presence wasn't needed.
Since I hadn't touched her private parts or anything, for the time being, she wasn't going to sue me, I guess? (I'm not sure myself)
In the end, the police decided to let us, the people involved, talk it out and come to an agreement amongst ourselves.
Your sparkling silhouette slowly comes to a halt in front of me
Actually, I was supposed to be pissed off at her, but with such a cute woman in front of me, I started sweating like a pig.
I was nervous as fuck. Yeah, I'm creepy. I guess, it's only natural that I get mistaken for a molester.
Because she, too, is someone very special.
Make her come out of that monitor if you can! AHAHAHAHAHA
You should've known that running after her would only get you into trouble.
I, for one, am honored to be able to take part in your first thread that marks the beginning of your love story.
Then he said something to her. It was probably something like "Why don't you talk to your lawyer and come up with a plan for next time?".
With nothing left to say to each other, we gladly accepted the suggestion. I had to give her my phone number (I wonder what she needs it for?), then we both headed home.
Let her think of you what she wants, but don't encourage her in her delusions.
I too run into overly precautious women on the streets at night and in elevators from time to time.
But look at the world we're living in. I'd be paranoid too if I was a woman.
Anyways, I think you have only yourself to blame for running after her, man.
"Let's meet in Harajuku...".
During the phone call I kept saying "Yes." to everything she said like a Yes Man, but it was only afterwards that I realized it.
We're not meeting up at the police station!?
And would you normally go out with the guy you suspect is a molester!?
I mean, that policeman gave her the opportunity to talk to her lawyer... Did she not do that!?
Eh? Is she stupid?
I kept wondering, but since brooding over it wasn't going to get me anywhere, I decided I'd prepare myself for tomorrow.
Needless to say, I went all dressed up expecting something awesome to happen.
http://news13.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news/1099572952/
619 VIPPER 04/11/05(Fri) 20:43:17 ID:j/3d8zOd
If this thread has 800 posts by 9pm today, I'll post my tits.
Thanks for all the replies. Btw, I'm sure you would have done the same and run after her too.
First of all, I didn't even have the faintest idea that she was running away from me. And if some crazy guy had really been after her, I wouldn't have known what to do.
Hey, what's with this strange turn of events?
Were you able to clear up her suspicion?
So you could say you got a date out of it. Right?
I fucking lol'd.
THE STORY OF ROAD MAN TO BE TURNED INTO A MOVIE!!
The casual Uniqlo + Levi's outfit I had settled on was far from what is considered fashionable these days.
After a while, she arrived. Afterwards, I realized that she was probably only late because she was watching from a safe distance at first and only appeared after making sure it's safe to come out.
She was extremely cute in her casual wear. Enough to give me a boner. If I get found guilty now, I'm 100% sure I'll regret all my life that I didn't at least grab her tits while I was at it.
The next time a woman gets scared of me and runs away, I'm running after her at full speed.
He's a real chaser.
Really? If I was walking along a street at night and a woman in front of me kept looking back, the first thing that'd come to my mind is
"She thinks I'm a molester! ･ﾟ･(ﾉД`;)･ﾟ･".
And? How did it go? Did you meet her today?
>>The casual Uniqlo + Levi's outfit I had settled on
At least make it Muji ＿|￣|○
The end.
For someone like me who used to think that wired communication is the only acceptable form of communication, it's enough to start panicking.
Still, it felt like a date and I was getting my hopes up until she opened her mouth and crushed them in an instant.
But she didn't say anything about taking responsibility or lawsuits. She simply wanted to hear my take on the matter.
My guess is that she wanted to make sure if I'm really a molester or not before passing judgment on me.
That was my opportunity to present myself in a good light.
Well, shit.
|1/ |1/
／￣￣￣｀ヽ、
/ ヽ
/ ⌒ ⌒ |
| （●） （●） | >>1 Hey, OP.
/ |
/ |
（ ＿ |
（ヽ、 / ）|
| ｀`ー――‐''"| ヽ|
ゝ ノ ヽ ノ
￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
|1/ |1/
／￣￣￣｀ヽ、
/ ヽ
/ ⌒ ⌒ |
| へ へ | Hehe, just felt like calling you♪
/ |
/ |
（ ＿ |
（ヽ、 / ）|
| ｀`ー――‐''"| ヽ|
ゝ ノ ヽ ノ
￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
Me: "What's wrong?"
M: "..."
Me: "?"
As she didn't answer, I got up and turned away from her to go the restroom.
What I saw then was...
Glasses missing his head.
I panicked and tried to turn around, but felt a strong blow to my head.
With the last of my fading consciousness, I understood everything.
(I see, so it was you.)
I was desperately making excuses. I think I was so desperate spit was flying everywhere.
She kept her responses to a minimum, it was me talking all the time. While sweating like a pig.
I smell an indictment.
"Are you done?"
I could feel my blood run cold.
"...I'm done."
What kind of question is that? Made me feel like a middle-schooler trying to crack a joke and failing at it miserably.
No one said anything for a while.
Get off your high horse, bitch!!!
You felt sincerity in my words!? I felt presumptuousness in your words, you insect-poo-leaf-beetle!! And you know what, you're cute like Ogura Yuuko, idiot!!
All of a sudden, I could feel anger building up inside me. Yesterday, she was a real mess and now she's acting all high and mighty.
Besides, if you look at it my way, I'm totally the victim, not her.
She seemed to go on telling me that she's forgiven me or something, but her words didn't reach my ears at all.
Miss Understandings like her should be going home by train.
How old are you?
"AHH!?"
I was so busy being pissed off that when I suddenly replied, I ended up sounding like some delinquent.
"No, uh... only if you're free, of course..."
"Huh? What if I am?"
"I'd like to invite you to lunch..."
I didn't get what was going on in her head. I really didn't get it. But I liked where things were going.
Insect-Poo-Leaf-Beetle or Chlamisus spilotus (Baly)
The name says it all. In the left picture, it's sitting on a white nettle leaf, but you usually find it on young leaves of Quercus serrata like in the right picture. You also find it in many illustrated insect encyclopedia.
Despite it's looks, it can fly properly.
http://www2.wbs.ne.jp/~musi/xkoham40.htm
I sure didn't expect that.
I'll curse you! (ﾟдﾟ)PTOOEY
I'll congratulate you! RUB IT!
I guess, my irritation showed on my face and she felt like she had to make up for it.
The fact that she had not really planned on having lunch with me was painfully obvious, ARI ARI ARRIVEDERCI.
Imagine a guy with a plastic bag in a supermarket that keeps glancing over to the security cameras. You'd start suspecting him too. That's how he must have looked to her.
Honestly, I've grown tired of it.
I wonder if a creepy virgin otaku like me is better off staying away from crowded trains...
To be honest, I was a tad disappointed. The difference in chicness between the family restaurant and the coffee lounge from earlier was huge. Like Ayers Rock huge.
But the same could be said about her attitude. She had stepped off her high horse.
And as if to humor me (?), she kept talking to me with a smile on her face. I wanted to answer with a smile too, but the only topic to come to mind was the video of Koda Shosei.
I couldn't possibly mention a decapitation video, so I talked about the Iraq War instead.
↓
Molesterman wakes up on a hospital bed!
↓
W-Why won't my body move!? Molester was strapped to the bed!
↓
Miss Understanding: "You'll now become an organ donor!"
↓
Wha-What did you say!?
I wonder what would happen if an extremely ugly landwhale accused an extremely handsome guy of molesting her in a crowded train.
Is that Booking Life?
I always grip the hanging straps with both hands.
I think that it's the least people with a creepy face like me should do.
Go, Molester Man! Make her your sex slave!
"I see, I'm going home then."
and directly left.
Like they say, treat them mean and keep them keen.
Don't kill yourself (´・ω・`)
http://www.geocities.co.jp/Milkyway-Aquarius/7075/trainman.html
It might take a day to read, but do it now!
There was no awesome turn of events like going to the movies together afterwards.
"Sorry again for everything."
"No, no, I have to apologize for all the trouble I've caused you."
"No, no."
"No, no."
Then we went our separate ways.
Foreign Teacher
In b4 incoming phone call
Me: "What's wrong?"
M: "..."
Me: "?"
As she didn't answer, I got up and turned away from her to go the restroom.
What I saw then was...
Teacher T missing his head.
I panicked and tried to turn around, but felt a strong blow to my head.
With the last of my fading consciousness, I understood everything.
(I see, so it was you.)
I see... Sometimes I envy handsome guys so much it hurts.
I can't stop wondering how my life would be if I was handsome and had a girlfriend.
Ohh, looks interesting. Thanks.
It was her asking "Hello, what do we do about the report to the police?".
Huh? Report to the police? Do you have to do that kind of thing?
What I saw then was...
a woman missing her head.
No, it was just her and if you think about it, it's only natural that she would be on the same platform since she lives in the same direction as me.
For some stupid reason, seeing her took me by surprise and got my hopes up again.
I wonder about the same thing once every month, but then I convince myself that handsome guys have their own problems, problems only handsome guys have.
Thinking like that helps.
>>58
Just a troll, I guess..?
M and Teacher T are characters from this story:
Foreign teacher
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1098296585/l50
Foreign teacher 2
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1098450480/l50
【◆V3RRDLWSag】I finally understand my foreign teacher【Working Adult Arc】
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1098542600/l50
"I won't see her ever again if we go now!!"
is what I thought, so I made up some random excuse and told her I'm busy today.
I suggested
"How about I give you a call when I'm free?"
while making a face like saying "So give me your phone number or e-mail addy!!!".
"I don't know about that...",
but caught herself and instead said
"Sure, here's my number."
Then she drew closer to me to show her cell phone screen. I was sweating like a pig. I couldn't take it, it was too much, too much for me to handle.
But then again, even if I had been totally calm, I would still have had no idea how to add new contacts because I have zero friends.
I was busy for minutes frantically trying to add her phone number. (In the end, I just started a new e-mail and wrote her number into the text field.)
"Okay, thank you."
"I'll be waiting then."
"Yes, let's go to the police station when we're both free."
"I must be imagining things..."
The moment Molesterman looked ahead to keep on walking, he was petrified.
A tall woman with long hair was pushing a baby carriage right in front of him.
In the baby carriage, however, was not a baby, but a jizou.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"
Suddenly, the woman started screaming and beating the jizou with her bare hands.
I feared that she'd had enough of the topic, but she seemed surprisingly interested, so maybe it wasn't such a bad move after all.
Thank you, Mr. Koda.
When I got off the train at my train station, she did too.
I knew that she'd get off at the same station, but it somehow felt like I was taking her home with me.
So I carefully asked her
"We live in the same direction, right? Are you going home now too?".
Huh? Should I be worried about something?
Wondering what she meant, I started walking.
When we got to that alley, I suddenly realized it. Perhaps, she wants to see if I'll really go along that route on my way home.
So this is the final test.
With that on my mind, I perfectly retraced the route I took that evening and I arrived at my place without any complications.
Behold. This is the house I live in. Take a good look at it. But please don't look at my room.
I said and promised to contact her soon. She left soon after.
And that was a few hours ago.
What should I do now?
Contact her!
I'm disappointed in you.
Hell if I know!
Post the rest of that story of yours!
Asshole.
Then you proceed to slowly take control of her private life as a molester slash advisor. What do you think?
You could make use of this fact.
How?
>>176
Why?
>>177
Come on, help me out, bro.
Thanks for the fun little story.
Oh yeah, go to your local bookstore and look for a book called "Train Man". Read it.
If you keep clinging to her too much, you're gonna get indicted for realw
Become a stalker.
Nothing. You seem to have already missed your chance anyway.
And carve this as a bitter memory deep in your heart forever.
Send her an e-mail! Something like "Will you go to the movies with me? As a token of apology, it'll be on me." will do!!
Sue her for slander...
"Do you have any idea how much trouble your little misunderstanding has caused me?"
and make her feel bad.
And if it is, it's definitely the last chance I'll ever get.
As for the report, it should be enough to give the policeman in charge a call, you don't have to go to the police station for that.
She seems a little slow though, so I guess she hasn't even thought of that possibility.
"I got two leftover movie tickets and I thought I'd ask you if you want to join me." is more effective.
Women seem to find it hard to accept such offers unless there's a good excuse to.
Tell us your specs please.
Make her apologize!
Don't worry, if you think about it calmly you'll realize it's not really a chance at all.
"Thank you for treating me to lunch today.".
Every time I see that line, I wonder if there really are idiots out there who buy too many movie tickets.
Guys, guys.... this is turning into a Train Man kind of thread!
Shut up! I still want to believe!!
>>199
How cool!!
>>200
That's it!!
Let me directly send her an e-mail.
You could get the tickets as a gift or someone you wanted to go to the movies with calls it off etc.
In that case, go to the police station with her sometime before noon!
Then, when you leave the police station, ask her out like
"Ah, it's almost noon. Would you like to have lunch with me?"
And when she turns you down, and she will, you'll finally realize your true feelings.
If she's really interested in you, she'll surely contact you herself.
She seems like the type of strong-willed woman to do that.
Then tell me one, just one valid reason why you should believe in it!
You can't. Because it's all in your head, man.
I see...
I've never preordered movie tickets, so I wouldn't know.
Now No one's that stupid, but the idea is, if you ask her like that, she might think
"Hey, he got two leftover tickets... I guess, it'd be a waste not to use them.".
That's not bad either.
>>206
No, well, this might sound mean, but I think she's a little slow in the head. But not in a screws loose way.
You know, sometimes you see these really dumb high school girls in talk shows and the like. Dunno if it's just an act, but here's my theory.
Girls like that aren't any gyaru or delinquents as you'd expect, but actually properly brought-up girls from normal families instead.
"So he WAS stalking me that evening...".
Maybe.
You must be stupid to buy that shit.
What would you think if you got an e-mail from the suspicious guy you mistook for a molester?
She'll regret telling you her e-mail addy.
"He was a molester after all!"
and you'll be in an even tighter position.
Tell us about your specs already.
Depending on your looks, you might not even deserve talking about having a chance.
And his publisher sent him here because they want to make more money.
Believe me, women see right through stuff like that.
In the end, it depends on the woman and whether she thinks that way of asking someone out is annoying or cute.
Hey, I cried like a little girl when Train Man confessed his love to her.
Height: 163cm
Weight: 50kg
Looks: In the "Rate my face" thread, I was told I look normal. I frequently get mistaken for a middle-schooler because of my babyface.
Hobbies: Anime, games, tropical fish, reptiles
All in all, I'm a typical semi-shut-in. I don't go out unless it's absolutely necessary.
If she thought of you as a potential molester, she would never meet up with you alone.
So if she had still been suspecting you, she'd have brought someone else with her, don't you think?
You're free of suspicion now!
Now hurry up and write an e-mail to her already.
Even if they see through it, and they definitely do, asking her out like that gives them the excuse
"Well, even if he bought the tickets to ask me out, the tickets would go to waste if I said no now.".
I heard, women prefer being asked out like that.
It's okay if they see through it (´・ω・`)
What counts in the end is not something superficial like whether she believes that your tickets are really leftover tickets or not ＿|￣|○
Post a picture of yourself!!!!!!1
I like how you like reptiles.
Let me guess, you got neon tetras and cardinal tetras, right?
Subject: You're welcome
"You're welcome. I'm sorry for taking up your time when you're busy.
I've caused Mr. Arima (pseudonym for the police officer) a lot of trouble and I figured it would be best if I apologized to him in person. That's why I made such a selfish request.
I have already made sure to contact Mr. Ken (pseudonym for Glasses)."
Ah! I see!! It's to give the woman an excuse not to refuse!!!
Now I get it!! I learned something new, thanks! ＿〆(。。) taking notes
Hobbies: tropical fish
You can use this. RUB IT!!
Hobbies: anime
Don't mention this.
Hobbies: games
You can talk about this, but tone it down.
Hobbies: reptiles
There are girls that like them too, so try to find out if she likes them first.
The path that leads from here to coitus is a very long one...
Wait, does that mean you're not going to go to the police station with her?
Do you have leopard geckos?
Yeah, well, I only have a few snakes right now because I'm a poorfag. If I ever get to have a decent income, I wanna try keeping lizards.
>>230
Sorry, I'm not interested in having a pretty aquarium with clean water and pretty fish. Not interested in plecos and the like either.
You don't have a choice but to launch an all-out war. Ask her out in a clever way and make her decide between Glasses and you.
Wait a second! What's that about contacting Glasses?
She didn't know Glasses before >>23 happened, right?
Does that mean they're already close enough to be in contact with each other?
We need to know what role Glasses plays and what he means to her.
Sometimes, they're like "Meh, I'm wasted anyway, so why not."
or "My boyfriend cheated on me too, so why not.".
Asking out like that works in many cases! RUB IT!!
A pretty aquarium with pretty fish will attract a lot more attention from guests though!!
Just in case she comes to your place, remodel your aquarium now!!
That's the kind of guy Glasses is!!
So think about what to reply!!!!!!1111111111111
You shouldn't make any clumsy advances on her as long as Glasses is still around.
Being caring and being plain persistent are two different things.
How old are you?
No, I don't because crickets are too damn loud... This house has very thin walls.
>>239
Well, since he's one of the people involved in this case, he got called to the police too every time.
We haven't talked much though because well, if I'm a molester, he's like the hero.
>>241
I guess, that's true. I just can't muster any interest for water plants to decorate my aquarium with.
So, when will you be free?
If she doesn't answer the call, your call will land in her call history, but you can still change your mind and turn back when she calls back.
But you can't take back an e-mail once you've sent it.
"I... I'm sorry... The truth is that the guy with the glasses and I have been acquaintances for quite some time already.
He came to me yesterday and said there's a woman he likes. He told me to act like a stalker so he can save you from me."
Write this to her and ruin the good impression he made on her!
"Thank you very much. I have caused Mr. Glasses trouble too. It somehow doesn't feel right for me to apologize though.
I hope you understand."
My sides hurt.
Sounds like an annoying woman to be with. I bet she's an attention whore.
But if you have an aquarium full of unusual fish, the only reaction, if you ever get one, is "What's this weird-looking fish?" at best.
Anyways, just quickly settle on a day for the police visit and decide depending on the mood of that day whether to ask her out or not.
It's an unknown number, hold on
Dude, if you justify yourself in such a casual manner, it makes you look like a guy that always makes excuses.
Quit making excuses and concentrate on your mission to meet her again.
Keep in mind though, your mission this time is just a losing battle.
It's either an invitation to an online dating site or a false billing scam phone call.
You both live in the same town, so you're bound to run into her someday.
Just hold out until then.
And the next time you meet her, ask her how she's been doing and ask her out for dinner or something.
The point is that she doesn't trust you yet. Make sure to let some time pass before you attack.
Rack your brains for me and think about what I should do next while I'm talking to my mom
I think there was a thread like that on the board for loser men.
Yeah, crickets can be a real problem.
The admin of a website about reptiles I learned a lot from said the first thing he does after buying crickets is cut off their wings.
Well, when you can afford to buy more reptiles, start off with buying a leopard gecko. They might be a bit too casual for your taste, but they're really easy to keep.
I wanna keep snakes again...
Albino Striped California King Snakes (;´Д`)pant pant
I fucking lost it
Maybe it's better to let some time pass before you try something after all.
I like that.
Molester Man's love for Miss Understanding eventually turns into hatred and he starts leaving messages like "Allahu Akbar!" on her answering machine
until the secret police busts his ass.
"No, no, please don't worry about that, I've already told him that it was just one big misunderstanding.
My misunderstanding has caused you two so much trouble..."
／ , ＼ UnderageB&(16) ◆9Xm6zmxuk
. / ,.ｨ /ヽ ｉ､ ヽ
ｉ ,ｲ+|/ ヽl'ヽﾄ､ .i Height = 150cm
. ｉ /!r;=. r ;=:.､ヽ l
| l { h;」 ｈ;;} ! | .| Weight = 45kg
|. } ､ | |
| ヽ. ｰ-‐' | | B-W-H: gulp...
| ` ､. ___,. '´| │
| | ﾄ、 } .| .|
The part between my solar plexus and right below my belly button is loose and convex-shaped.
I was unfortunately born with a very small bust. I remember how my classmates mocked me in the bathroom during the school trip in ninth grade because I have a body of a little girl. *sob sob*
http://life6.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/mental/1099233638 Archive
http://life6.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/utu/1099352666 Shelter
I'm sending it, okay?
Yeah, I wouldn't have sent an e-mail like that either.
How about this as a reply?
"To be honest, you can't even begin to imagine how much trouble it was. I didn't tell you anything today because I didn't want to worry you,
but because of you mistaking me for a molester, my girlfriend broke up with me when she found out about it.
How are you going to make it up to me?"
Just make up a girlfriend in your head!
Good luck with the rest.
"No, no, please don't feel bad about it. I mean, I got treated to delicious lunch too.
I told you I'd contact you about when to go to the police, but you probably work on weekdays, right, Miss Understanding? Should it be on a weekend then?"
Am I going to flunk it?（つД｀）
('A`) Benoist
The question is what Glasses will make out of this e-mail now.
And make it look like you're a normal person.
Thus, Molester Man is the one who gets stalked in the end.
Look outside your window. Glasses Man might be peeking inside.
Then follow up with "From now on, I'll protect you like a Guardian Angel Getten!!!!"
Trip up already!
Are you planning on going to that college if you should pass the exam? In that case, go to bed now.
If you're taking the exam just to see what an entrance exam is like.... go to bed now anyway.
>>1 (ﾟДﾟ) Hang in there!
Shugogetten much?w
Woman: "Really?"
Glasses: "Yeah, really! That's how stalkers are! (`･ω･´)"
Even so, I think this thread is great.
Nah... I had a 7 hours afternoon nap (I skipped school).
I think I'll pull an all-nighter and watch this thread all nightw
But I guess, depending on your living circumstances, calling her isn't always an option.
>>1 Do you live alone?
Tell us in short what happened until Molester comes back.
He's a formidable opponent, so make sure not to misinterpret his message.
It'd be even funnier if Miss Understanding had started a thread about this in Lounge and Glasses was a tripfag there.
Yesterday evening, my girlfriend says she wants to break up with me because of a small argument we had.
↓
This morning, she sends me an e-mail saying that she was only testing my feelings when she said she wants to break up. I snap and we have a fight.
↓
This evening, I call my girlfriend and we make up. Our relationship is reinstated on more solid foundations and based on a greater trust than ever.
↓
After the call, we write each other lovey-dovey e-mails like "I love you.", "I love you too.", "Let's live together one day.", "Yeah, let's!" and so on.
↓
I get carried away and send an extremely vulgar e-mail that goes like "If you wanna have sex, just say so." to my girlfriend who's not too fond of dirty jokes and sex in general.
↓
She doesn't reply.
↓
I wander around VIP until I find this thread. ← (This is where I am right now)
Send her more creepy e-mails!!!1
AHAHAHAHA
Go ahead and cry if you feel like it.
All you can do now is write more creepy e-mails.
I'm sorry, but I got a good laugh out of itw
You sure she isn't just busy trying to come up with an extremely indecent reply?
Don't worry, everything will have gone back to normal tomorrow morning.
Mr. Glasses Man and I have started going out.
We fell in love with each other at first sight!
It was just like in the TV soaps.
In fact, Mr. Glasses Man is lying next to me right now. ♥
It was thanks to you, Mr. Molester Man, that I was able to meet Mr. Glasses Man.
Thank you very much for that!
P.S.
Please don't send any e-mails to me again.
You're creeping me out.（＾＾）
If you open your entrance door now, you might find a woman wearing nothing but a coat standing there.
Thanks for the details.
Your story is a lot more interesting than this one.
It's Glasses guy we're talking about here. He wouldn't come up with a shoddy e-mail like that...
Look, don't underestimate the Glasses guy!
Reading "If you open your entrance door..." made me think of Zashiki Onna.
That was a great manga.
↓
>Starting to get worried, I quickened my pace further until I was running pretty fast, while looking over my shoulder trying to see what she was running away from.
↓
>Unable to think something else, I ran as fast as I could and caught up to her.
If you run after her, you can't complain about getting mistaken for a molester.
Jihad.
Target thread: I got totally mistaken for a molester
Keyword: Molester Man
Number of hits: 17
Molester Man mindw
Dude, she likes you so much that she wanted to test your feelings for her.
There's no way she'd stop liking you because of something like "If you wanna have sex, just say so.".
I'm sure she just doesn't know what to reply to your e-mail.
Just write her a new one and change the topic to something else.
Get yourself a trip, it's annoying having to look for your ID all the time.
dinnerwhere help
So many people replied to my post while I was gone downloading H-manga off the NSFW 2D board. Thank you very much!!
Here's how our e-mail exchange went until she stopped replying:
Me: "(My full name) loves (my gf's full name) more than anyone in the world."
Gf: "I like you too!! I like you so so so much♪I love you!(^_-)-☆ Let's stay together forever!"
Me: "Yeah, I'll be with you forever. One day, we'll live together too!"
Gf: "Yeah! I can't wait to see you tomorrow!"
Me: "Alright, I'm going to bed early tonight!"
Gf: "Already..? No, don't get me wrong, go to bed if you want to! I'm not going to bed yet though."
Me: "Okay, as long as you're awake, I'll stay up too! You don't mind, do you?"
Gf: "Of course not! I'd be really happy! Thanks! I love you!"
Me: "I'm glad. (My brain stopped working here.) Look. If you ever feel like having sex, I'd like you to just say so."
And 12 minutes later
I realized I fucked it up orz
Hang in there.
This part is relevant to my interests.
Alright, how about you send her something like this?
"To be honest, it really turns me on to hear the words "Ravage me!" and I always wanted hear these words from your mouth.
I'm sorry, I didn't really mean it... well, maybe I did mean it a little. Sorry."
This will change the topic and everything should be fine again.
I see, you didn't really mean to send her a creepy e-mail.
How does that change the topic?w
Ahh, this is hilariousw
I'm sure she's just a very shy girl. You need to guide her slowly and carefully.
I got totally mistaken for a molester
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099651701/
ID:w8ZHuVTS Lame('A`)
↑ That's just like the way my girlfriend writes... down to that damn smiley... my girlfriend uses it a lot...
Shit, I'm starting to get depressed now. You reminded me that I'll be busy this year with exams and she'll be busy next year with her college entrance exam.
We won't be able to see each other a lot in the next few years. We're 8 years apart by the way...
I just sent her another apology e-mail (the second one in the last few hours).
And all I really wanted was to hear the words "Hey, let's have sex..." from a girl once in my lifetime.
Sorry, but what do you guys mean with creepy e-mail?
You guys have gotten a bit tired of this type of threads, haven't you?
Even the way he writes is the same.
Anyone would notice.
Just write her what you wrote in that second line!
You're too stupid to even qualify as a troll.
Is your girlfriend the clingy type too?
You know, when you're with her, she's always clinging to you and she doesn't like it when you don't reply to an e-mail right away.
Not good, huh... Then how about this?
"Sorry about my last e-mail. I got a little excited because we made up, is all. So I'll just say it instead.
Ravage me!! I want to be fucked senseless by you..."
Is it better now?
Nope, not better. It's actually gotten worse.
send her a set of Hermes cups.
According to my girlfriend, it's not that she dislikes sex, she just doesn't know much about it and it doesn't really interest her either.
As for me, I love sex! I know a lot about it and it's the most interesting thing in the world!
I don't think that what you want to hear from her is something only sex-hungry women would say. It's a pretty normal thing to say.
Your girlfriend probably thinks men don't like women that admit they like sex.
On the other hand, when women like her do have sex, it's like something inside their head that was holding them back gets released and they turn into sex beasts... or so the guy that lives inside my head said.
>>1 got mistaken for a molester, but managed to clear up the suspicion and is now trying to become the second coming of Train Man.
>>320 got carried away after making up with his girlfriend and sent her some creepy e-mail and is now fighting a glorious battle for his relationship.
Maybe she's taking a shower or something.
I sent the e-mail 1 hour and 40 minutes ago... I beg you, please go to bed before you read my creepy e-mails!!
No, wait a second. What if my girlfriend is a 2channer, no, a vipper?? What if she's watching this thread right now!?
Have you never done it with your girlfriend?
Thanksw
＼＿＿＿＿ ＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
Ｖ ｜ Glasses: "...................."
＼＿＿＿_ ＿＿＿＿＿
＿＿＿＿||-||-||＿_Ｖ＿_
| | / . ||/||/|| // | |
| | . ||/||/|| | |
| | ∧∧ ||=||=|| ∧＿∧
／／| （ ,,） ||=||=|| （ ）＼
／／ |ニ/,, ⊃二||=||=||二⊂ ﾉ ＼＼
...／／ ／ ~て )_) ||_.||._|| (⌒ 〇 ＼＼
／ （/ ∪＿＿＿＿＿＿し￣ ＼
／ ／ ＼ ＼
／ ／ ＼ ＼
************************The End************************
She's your first girlfriend, right?
We had our first "experience" when we stayed in a love hotel for a few hours.
In that case, counter it with this.
"You like teasing, huh? If you keep teasing me like that, I'll end up stalking you, missy!"
That should do it.
She's the first girl I've dated for as long as a month.
I'll go take a bath!
Worry not, friend, there are virgin girls out there that give you head on the first day. I know because I experienced it first hand.
What's wrong? Weren't you laughing in >>322?
that this has totally turned into >>320's thread.
Give her a call at least once a day, e.g. in the evening.
"Do you like me or my body? Which is it?".
After I started dating her, my cell phone bill quadrupled and my telephone bill increased sevenfold, which was very tough on someone like me who had been a semi-shut-in only a month earlier...
I'm just glad I switched to a packet flatrate service this month.
Btw, I finally got a reply from my girlfriend.
It says, I quote, "I was sleeping.".
I mean, she ignored two of your e-mails already.
If she's really mad at you, nothing you do now will help, it'll just make things worse.
If she's in a better mood tomorrow, give her a call tomorrow evening.
A 10 minute phone call will make her happier than one hour of text messaging.
She asked me exactly that last sunday IIRC.
>>395
E-mails <<<<<<<< phone calls <<<<< (unclimbable wall) <<<<<< face-to-face conversations
I'll go see her tomorrow.
I missed your post by a second...
I think you shouldn't get stingy after only a month of dating.
I know, I know it in my head, but...
The Zashiki Onna...
- The day after we first had sex
- The day after she spent the night at my place for the first time
- The day after she came over to my place and we cooked together, had a lot of fun together etc.
- Less than an hour after we passionately loved each other and exchanged words of love
Why is it always like this...
I'd blame the egg yolk for it.
I'm sure it's because you get careless as soon as you spent the night with her.
It's a big thing for her, so until she gets used to it, you better put more effort into it.
Look at it this way. Between all those times you had a fight with her, you got along with her just fine, isn't that good enough?
"No, I don't work full time.
I'm what you call a freelance part-timer. I'm nowhere as cool as it sounds though."
Just as I was about to post her reply, my whole family came over to my place and only left just now.
My girlfriend told me she got dumped by her ex-boyfriend in a pretty mean way (he told her he found someone he likes more than her).
Which is why she easily gets paranoid because of small things. In addition, she suffers from a lack of self-confidence.
She's just a cute, normal high school girl if you were to see her though.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to make it look like it's all her fault.
>>406
I guess, you're right.
"I'm sure that's not true.
Well, I'm going to contact you again when I'm free.
Let's go on a day that works for us both."
After that, she replied something like "Okay, I'll be waiting." and that was it.
Welcome back, OP.
Sorry for turning your thread into a relationship advice thread...
Please continue your report.
And my dad didn't go easy on me either.
What did he say?
Just to make things easier for the future, get yourself a trip.
You might not believe me, but I'm OP and I'll post with a tripcode from now on.
>>413
I didn't want to make a big deal out of it, so I told my family
"I got mistaken for a molester, can you believe it? Haha"
like it was nothing, but my whole family ganged up on me and cross-examined me.
And since they came out of the blue, I didn't have any time to hide my posters and stuff, so dad kept ranting on and on about my hobbies.
There was a time when I used to think like too.
I'm sick of you.
You got no talent!
And your story is too unrealistic.
I'm really sorry.
I know it's suspicious that I came back right after the IDs changed, but it was because I had to send my family away with the excuse that the rerun of "SAKUSAKU" is about to begin soon.
Of course, what I really wanted to watch was To Heart that comes right before it.
>>419
I don't know about talent, but if this isn't realistic enough for you, go complain to reality.
Grappler Baki is here!
Woot━━━━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━━━━!!!
Vippers have... trips too.
No, but let me summarize it to sort things out for myself too.
- it seems like the misunderstanding has been cleared up
- it's still unclear what kind of relation she has with Glasses (all we know is that they're in contact with each other)
- she's a freelance part-timer
- by no stretch of the imagination could you say that she's smart
Once I know when I have time go to the police station, I'll write her an e-mail about it.
I'm still contemplating on when and what kind of e-mail to send.
"No, it wasn't a mistake. He must be a real molester."
But well, it makes for a fun thread.
What are your plans with that woman?
She doesn't suspect me anymore, but she doesn't really trust me either, I guess?
>>428
To be blunt, I wanna seicross her.
My nutcase alarm would be ringing all the time telling me to get away from her.
Someone please share your knowledge with me.
Truer words were never spoken.
>>1
Don't get your hopes up too much.
Whatever you do, you'll never be like Train Man.
If anything, you're the old fart that was harassing Hermes in the train.
I predict that the next time you go to the police station, Miss Understanding will arrive in Glasses' car.
So instead of looking a girlfriend, look for a job!!
I'm sick of you.
You got no talent!
And you got no literary skills whatsoever.
You need more information if you wanna "seicross" her!
First of all, find out where she lives!
I'm thinking of following the plan someone in this thread set up for me that goes like this:
I arrange the time so that we're done with the police report shortly before noon and I ask her out for lunch afterwards.
It was quite good, I can tell you spent a lot of time on it.
You passed and I'll be looking forward to your next work.
By the way, I advise you not to stretch it out any further, it'd get dull quickly.
I'd say it's best you come out clean now.
This shit is so fucking boring!
Come back when you've overhauled the whole thing, especially the story.
What a waste of time.
Your story went to shit at this point.
If you don't get why, you're just a talentless hack.
Yeah, that's the best I can think of too...
Get to know her better during lunch.
Don't write her any e-mails, instead wait for her to write you one.
When she does, give her a reply like "It's a fucking pain in the ass, but if you insist...".
And then tell her that you can only go in the morning.
Now you're ready to commence the mission >>205 prepared for you.
Come on...
Can you make it more obvious that you just wanna ride the Train Man wave?
It hurts to watch, man.
Then how about something like this?
"About going to the police station, are you free on the XXth? We could meet in front of the station at 11am.
If the day isn't good for you, please don't hesitate to say so."
I don't want to make her wait too long, so I'm thinking of sending this e-mail tomorrow and going to the police station the day after.
>>442's suggestion seems like a safe bet.
So come up with a counter-measure against Glasses first!
If you know your enemies and know yourself, you can win a hundred battles without a single loss.
Give me a break! This may be my final struggle!!
>>446
No, as I posted a few minutes ago, I wrote her I'd contact her and ended the e-mail exchange for today.
>>444
Give me a break! This may be my final struggle!!
Is it really necessary to continue when everyone already knows it's fake?
Back out before it's too late.
Since you seem to be trying hard, let me give you some serious advice for a change.
I think 11 am is a very unusual time to meet up for a normal working member of society.
Just in case you didn't know because you don't have the slightest bit of common sense.
True that.
Looks like we have to find out more about her first.
Someone sneak into her house!
There's plot holes everywhere!
I guess when you stay a shut-in for too long you make up stuff like this in your head and end up believing them yourself.
I pity you to be honest.
You're nowhere near as skilled as Train Man was.
Even if you don't believe me, I'm thankful that you're expecting much from me.
I'll be counting on your advice.
>>452
Dude, she's a freelance part-timer and I'm unemployed.
I'm sure she'll just say no if it's not a good time for her.
Google it.
I don't know her age.
But since she said she's been a part-timer since she graduated from high school, I'm guessing she's in her early twenties.
Sorry, didn't see it orz...
In that case, definitely this. >>445
That means, you're in your mid-twenties, I assume.
I guess, that explains why you don't know how unusual a time 11 am is for a meeting.
I can't be assed to explain it to you, so I'll let this one slide.
Why don't you tell her when you're free and make her decide the meeting time?
I'm still a university student, mind you.
ttp://www.geocities.co.jp/Milkyway-Aquarius/7075/trainman.html
Sorry, it got a bit confusing.
I'm a university student, but I haven't gotten very far yet. I might even drop out.
She's a freelance part-timer, probably in her twenties.
Have you fapped to that woman already?
If this kind of thing happened to you, what would be the best way to deal with it?
Is there no way to make a woman like Miss Understanding shut up?
Sorry, it got confusing because I kept going on and on about the meeting time. Please forget what I said.
Though I still think that you shouldn't suggest meeting at 11 am to someone you're not even friends with.
It's probably best to get away from a woman as soon as you feel like she's behaving strangely, even it's just a guess.
Even in a train, move away as soon a woman gets near you.
A wise man keeps away from danger. Call me a coward if you will. Nothing gained, but nothing lost either! Long live the cold-hearted Japanese people! Live and let live, man!
>>471
But she expects me to choose the time and there's no way to guess when a freelance part-timer works, is there?
In any case, as an unpopular guy, I'd like to try the asking-her-out-for-lunch plan.
I won't say anything if you wanna go all out and try your luck, but if you bet everything on that 11 am plan, what will you do if she suggests a different time?
You won't even get to ask her out for tea then.
What's wrong? Did something happen?
If someone's as talentless as >>1, you already notice after about 200 posts that their story is fake.
Well, since we can't predict what she'll say either way, this discussion is moot.
try to take advantage of the Train Man boom?
I must also admit Train Man's story is on a whole another level compared to >>1's story...
"Molester Man".
I read everything so far and I think...
First of all, >>1 should post a picture of himself. (・∀・)
It's not worth shit if it's not at least a MARCH university.
Letting yourself get trolled knowing it's a troll and devouring every shit that is served to you is VIP QUALITY, isn't it?
What's with you all pointing out the obvious and going all "It's fake! I can tell!" for? Shut up and play along.
If Glasses is still single, he'll probably think of it as his chance and try to get closer to her.
>>1 doesn't stand a chance if he goes about it the Train Man way...
I feel like he doesn't have a choice but to use some kind of trick or cheat to get her.
It just shows that >>1 doesn't have any talent for story writing.
In any case, he doesn't have a future as a writer.
Truth is often stranger than fiction.
Or would you prefer a thread called "Just as I thought, nothing interesting happened part 1" with a first post like this?
1 VIPPER 04/11/05 19:48:21 ID:w8ZHuVTS
Everyone in VIP, no, in 2ch, please hear me out.
The other day, I got totally mistaken for a molester.
The moment I realized it, I made a detour and went home saving myself a lot of trouble.
Guess that's reality for ya!!
I don't see anything interesting about a thread like that. Hmm... It might make for a few good laughs as a joke thread though.
I'm grateful for any kind of response I get. Without your posts, I can't figure out by myself what to do next.
Be it a troll or whatever, I want to hear all your opinions and suggestions.
Because if I don't do anything now, I'll definitely end up a magician and I'd like to prevent it at any cost.
You got my support, that's for sure.
I have high hopes for what's to come.
The whole thing feels way too unnatural to be true.
It just shows that >>1 doesn't have any talent for story writing.
In any case, he doesn't have a future as a writer.
No one gives a fuck. Solve your problems by yourself.
When I wrote >>483, I was just reading a summary of the original threads and was already moved, but now I found out it was even turned into a book.
I'm sure nighttime VIP will be a lot more helpful.
I was carrying a backpack with me and it somehow hit a woman's ass behind me.
When I turned around, she gave me like the meanest glare.
I, of course, countered with a "The fuck you want? Want me to rape you!?".
...in my mind.
I was in downtown with a friend. We wanted to watch a movie, but the movie theater had closed at that time of night. (Yeah, I know, we were stupid.)
And well, we were on our way back to the deserted street where we had left our bicycles.
There was a group of 4 girls walking ahead of us. 3 normal girls, plus one that looked like a gyaru.
I don't think she was a real gyaru though, it seemed like she just wanted to try it out for a night or something. They were headed in the same direction as us for some reason.
We thought it'd be weird to be too close and let them gain some distance, but they started whispering to each other as if they were talking about us.
We smiled it off and just kept walking. The gyaru suddenly started throwing glares at us though.
The other girls seemed to be trying to stop her or something. I felt like disappearing into thin air.
The gyaru suddenly started running, then slowed down to come closer etc. We didn't get what she was trying to do...
Every time we made a turn, they did too. I guess it was by chance and they were actually trying to run away from us...
In the end, they stopped in front of a vending machine all of a sudden to glare at us.
And we just passed them and the vending machine like they were invisible, wondering why life sucks so much.
Same thing happened to me too. My bag hit a middle-aged woman in the butt and she thought it was my hand.
The only difference is that she seemed to like it.
Women can be scary, man.
Heya, Miyuki-tan!＾＾
Nah, I figured 6 pm would be a good time.
Subject: Okay.
"Tomorrow? Tomorrow is my day off, so it works for me. I'll contact Mr. Glasses about it too."
ＯＴＬ
Threesome! Threesome!!
Oh, wait a second.
Did you fall for that woman?
Then what are you waiting for? Tell her you love her!
I don't know if it's love. Maybe it's just that I'm on cloud nine because it was the first time I got to talk to such a cute girl.
But why does Glasses have to come with us... What do I reply to her now?
Guys! Hurry up and tell me what to write!!
But no word about Glasses or she'll know that you have ulterior motives.
If you're in a better university than MARCH, I'll give serious replies to your posts.
"You're not working tomorrow? It doesn't have to be tomorrow, you know?"
Ahh, this isn't ending well.
OP keeps trying to avoid Glasses which makes him suspicious → OP is guilty after all
I can see it already happening.
"Yes, tomorrow is fine. Like I already mentioned yesterday, I have pretty flexible working hours and since I usually don't take any days off, it's not a problem for me.
But is tomorrow alright for you, Mr. Molester?"
Ever since I started this thread, I had a bad feeling about this, but now it's like I don't see how this is supposed to work out.
"I took a day off from work because I wanted to see you sooner!"
I take my hat off to >>1's lack of talent.
The problem is that the police matter is my only connection with her so far...
Which is why I figured that, as soon as the police matter is dealt with tomorrow, I'd somehow try to find something else that connects us. I still don't know how though.
>>538
I'm willing to go see her directly after a sleepless night as I'll be working night shift tonight. That's gotta count for something, right?
"Tomorrow is perfectly fine for me. You said you work in a family restaurant, Miss Understanding?"
"Yes, a family restaurant.
Mr. Glasses hasn't replied yet. I will let you know when he does."
Did she just... cut me off? OTL
I'm posting with a trip just in case this gets turned into a short story or something.
＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
／━━━━━━━━━ ＼
|┃|￣￣| 〇 〇 Ootsuki┃|
|┃|￣￣||￣￣￣￣￣￣|┃| VOOOM!!!
|┃|＿＿||＿＿＿＿＿＿|┃|
|┃ ＪＲ ┃|
|┗━━━━━━━━━┛| ＼('A`)／ ミ
| ━━ ━━ ━━. | （ ） ミ
| [Train Man] | └└ミ
| ＼＿／. |
| 〇 ━━━ 〇 |
|＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿|
│ │[=.=］｜ |
└─────────┘
I won't tell anyone, I promise.
Let me join you and post with a trip I'd thrown away a long time ago...
>>545
What if she comes to the police station with her boyfriend? (>з＜)=з Pfff
Alright, it's time for a break then. At least, until the meeting day/time is decided.
And when you meet up, decide if you wanna give up or not depending on how close Miss Understanding and Glasses seem to be.
If they don't seem to be that close, ask her flat out in an e-mail like "What kind of relation do you have with Mr. Glasses?"
It's a double-edged sword though as asking her that might awaken her interest in Glasses.
Anyhow, there's nothing you can do until then.
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099731471/
Tell her "You and Mr. Glasses are a good match, don't you think?" and make her think of Glasses that way.
Men and women normally come closer to each other slowly and gradually, but if people around them try to glue them together, when they're not ready for it yet, it has the opposite effect and they tend to drift away from each other again.
I believe in you, man!
When this turns into a novel, I'll definitely buy it!
"Quit the chit-chat, midget, and stay put until I contact you about the meeting time.", huh...
"It's so lame to be still wearing glasses at this time and age, don't you think?
Besides, he smells, YO!"
That sounds like something Hammer would sayw
Though if you're in the services sector, you can check e-mails during working hours.
I sure hope he replies before I have to go to my part-time job at 10 pm.
I've been wanting to say this while reading the thread... You with the ID:gMTLICo, get a fucking clue.
You're the one that's desperate.
>>1
All I can say to you for now is: Hang in there, man.
Even in the services sector, you can't just check your e-mails during working hours, unless you work outside.
BUT WHAT DO I KNOW, I DON'T HAVE A JOB.
I don't know how others think about it, but for me, an e-mail exchange is like playing catch.
If she were to write the next e-mail, she'd have tossed the ball twice in succession, now wouldn't she?
So, why don't you write something back like "Alright. I'll be waiting for your reply then."?
Otherwise it wouldn't be playing catch anymore.
Yeah! I'll see what I can do!!
>>561
My dad does office work and he always finds the time to play with his cell phone during work.
Also, there's always the option to check your e-mails on the toilet. But it depends on your job, I guess.
>>563
I-Is that right?
I didn't reply because I thought she might get annoyed if I send too many e-mails.
And it's too late now anyway, I don't have a choice but to wait.
Well, it's probably just me, but I'm convinced that playing catch is the way to go.
You did take a bit long, but it's not like it's an e-mail from yesterday or something, it should be okay to reply now.
And sometimes e-mails get stuck at the e-mail center and you get them a lot later too.
By the way, my wife and I got to know each other through e-mails.
I'm not trying to boast, but I only managed to make her mine because I kept playing catch with her.
It's like you're desperately hanging on to it as if your life depended on it and it shows in your e-mails.
She's bound to notice it, so if you're careless, she'll start distancing herself from you, you know?
I understand how you feel, I really do, but know that only fools allow themselves to be ruled by emotions.
Subject: Contact
"I just got a reply from Mr. Glasses. It seems he's booked for tomorrow.
What shall we do?"
There's only one thing we can do, right? Right?
"Ahh, I see.
Mr. Glasses has a full-time job, right? I'd feel bad making the police wait too long,
so how about we go by ourselves?"
This is okay, right? Right?
Let's think about it carefully first.
This might be the chance you've been waiting for though.
Calm down and wait a little longer.
Give us time to think about it.
But today's friday, that means, it'd have to be next week, you know?
■ ■■■ . ／ ＿ノ ,＿ノ＼ .+ ☆ . ■ ■
■■■■ ■ ■ / / iﾆ)ヽ, /rj:ヽヽ ヽ ■ ■
■ ■ ■ ■■■■■■■l::::::::: ;〈 !:::::::c! ' {.::::::;､! 〉 .|■■■■■■■■ ■ ■
.■■■■ ■ ■■ |:::::::::: (つ`''" `'ｰ''(つ | ■ ■
■ ■ +. ☆ 。. . |::::::::::::::::: ＼＿＿_／ | ☆ . * +.
■ ■ ヽ:::::::::::::::::::. ＼／ ノ . . . +☆ .● ●
I don't think I'll be of any help as I'm a guy who strongly believes that in a dialog with the opposite sex, there's always exactly three possible answers to every question.
Please let me hear your opinions.
100% not this.
Option B: "I see, I guess we can't do anything about it... How about we make it another time?"
Broadly speaking, I think we only have these two options (if we ignore the wording for now).
I wonder which is better...
The police won't care about him missing as long as the two people that were involved in the case are there.
I'm for going there with just the two of you.
My vote goes to option A!!
The question is how to suggest that in an unsuspicious way.
In that case, I'd like option A plz.
Or rather, what was wrong with what I wrote in >>570?
"You'd feel better about it if Glasses went with us, right?".
Then, since I'll be very busy starting next week, how about we go by ourselves?
Of course, only if you don't mind, Miss Understanding.
But if you do mind, we can just go on a different day.
And if she replies that she'd prefer a different day, it probably means that she's a no-go...
But if she replies "Okay", you'll know there's still hope, get it?
That's it!!
I'm going to copy it and send it!!
I said wait.
We haven't come to a conclusion yet.
>since I'll be very busy starting next week
This isn't true.
>Of course, only if you don't mind, Miss Understanding.
This part (ﾟ⊿ﾟ) is unnecessary.
If we don't go now, it'd have to be next week, but since I'd feel bad making the police wait too long, how about we go by ourselves?
Of course, only if you don't mind, Miss Understanding.
But if you do mind, we can just go on a different day.".
How's this?
Wait just a little longer before you reply.
Hardly anyone would say no if you ask like that.
I think it's better to take care of the matter as soon as possible.
Besides, I don't think the police will mind as long as they get a report from the two people directly involved with the case."
How's this sound?
Miss Understanding, if you don't mind, how about we go by ourselves?
But if you do mind, we can just go on a different day."
And this?
Hypocrite.
There's no need for stupid excuses.
It's okay, just wait a little longer.
And don't panic.
(Says the one that's panicking the most.)
Make her decide.
Although I'm in no position to say something like this as the suspect of the case, this one's kinda nasty.
>>597
I think this one incorporates the good parts from all suggestions well.
I also like how the humble part prevents it from appearing too aggressive.
Yeah. I fully agree.
This one it is.
A few of the suggestions were from me, but what really counts in the end is the "Then how about we go by ourselves?" part.
It might be even enough to send only that.
Don't you copy-paste the "And this?" part too!
Don't you do it!
"I'm not keeping you from something, am I?
You're right, I'd feel bad making Mr. Glasses go to the police for the third time anyway.
Shall we then meet up at the time you suggested in your earlier e-mail?"
What does she mean with keeping me from something?
"Yes, let's meet up at the station at 11 am.
By the way, why did you think you were keeping me from something?"
She probably meant to ask if you're really free tomorrow.
The thread was longer than I thought.
In many ways, I'm rooting for you, >>1!
Of course, I'll try to help too.
You'll never become famous like that.
I think she asked because you took so long to reply.
But I guess it's to be expected...
From a guy of your level...
Don't ask any unnecessary things, idiot!!
She said yes, now don't go and mess it up!
She's just being considerate wondering if you're taking so long to reply because you're busy with something .
You're coming on too strongly, man.
"No, I just thought that you might be busy because you took some time to reply.
Yesterday, you told me that you work part-time and I wouldn't want to keep you from work."
I didn't get what she meant at all.
So, what do I write her now?
Well, aren't you happy that you get to be alone with her?
Act more like you don't want to see her and just want to get it over with instead.
And make her feel bad for the whole thing.
She seems like a good girl.
In retrospect, maybe it was a good thing that you didn't reply directly.
Although it did make her worry about keeping you from something.
Anyways, things are looking pretty good now.
That's it! l^l^l^l９`Д´) POINT!
No, thanks, that sounds like something from an ero-guro gamew
"Sorry, I was on the phone and couldn't answer right away... (This is a lie.)
See you tomorrow at 11 am then."
OP is like, you know, a darker version of him.
In this case, Glasses is the one in the Train Man position.
Thus, >>1 should try to get his girl in a darker way.
To be frank, it took so long because I was wondering what to reply...
I'm not busy at all right now, so please don't worry about it.
When something bad happens to you, it's better to deal with it quickly and forget about it, don't you think?
I also regret doing something that caused such a misunderstanding.
Let's take care of it as soon as possible."
What do you think?
"I see. I'm sorry I took so long to reply.
I'm not especially busy right now.
Well then, see you tomorrow."
I like that... But I just sent her a reply. orz
"To be frank, it took so long because I was wondering what to reply...".
You have to stress that it was her fault and make her ask you out like
"I'm sorry for the misunderstanding. Let me treat you to dinner as a token of apology.".
And during that dinner, convince her that you're a much better person than she thought you'd be.
This is the only way I can think of for you to win her heart.
Oh, you already replied on your own...
Dude, do you even want our advice?w
"Alright. It's a bit early, but I wish you a good night.
Let's have lunch tomorrow after going to the police if you like."
I can't take it anymore, I'm gonna... I'm gonna!!
"When something bad happens to you, it's better to deal with it quickly and forget about it, don't you think?
I also regret doing something that caused such a misunderstanding.
Let's take care of it as soon as possible.
Good night."
I forgot to add this:
"I gladly accept. I'll be looking forward to lunch tomorrow."
If someone wishes you "Good night.", wouldn't you reply with "Good night."?
- ・ -
' ヽ
|∧∧
( 'A`)
） ）～
（ へ
/
Please accept my creepy powers, >>1!
Hey, it's kinda annoying to have to call you 1 or OP, so can I call you Molester Man from now on?
I just reread all my e-mails and as many have already pointed out, it seems I really was coming on too strongly.
Anyways, tomorrow I'll dress up and go all out.
Looks like Shinchousha Publishing Co. sent someone again as a successor of Train Man.
Or are you from some other publisher?
At any rate, it seems they realized they can use 2ch to make money.
Fuck them.
Yeah. You really are coming on a bit too strong.
Well, do your best.
Since the last e-mail is from her, she's going to keep wondering if he'll reply. That's exactly why he shouldn't reply because it'll make her think about him all day.
I don't know... Sorry if I'm being stubborn, but I think it's normal to at least reply "Good night" if someone wishes you a good night.
Much more so if someone asked you out for lunch, you have yet to say okay to that.
Who cares? If it gets famous, you can boast that you were part of it.
I take my hat off to >>1's lack of talent.
If you don't say okay to her treating you to lunch, she'll keep wondering
"Ah, maybe I shouldn't have asked him about lunch.".
I think you should at least write her something like "I gladly accept.".
Personally, I found >>651 to be pretty cool, so I don't think I'll reply.
Luckily, she spared me the trouble of having to ask her out for lunch, but what do I talk to her about during lunch?
I can't keep bringing up Iraq every time, can I?
Come on, at least write her "Good night".
Let's give him a little more time.
Haven't read everything yet, but I'm already envious that OP got to know someone that looks like Oguro Yuuko.
Better come up with some pretext for meeting her again after tomorrow like asking her if she wants to go to the movies with you or something.
Also, I too think that you should at least wish her a good night.
I don't know, she seems kinda indifferent about things like that. I'm sure she doesn't know anything about computers either.
Which reminds me, I don't know anything about her hobbies and interests.
You don't know each other for very long and since you're primarily meeting up tomorrow because of the police report,
I guess you can't really expect to have a friendly chat with her. Try something like
"That night... I must admit I was very surprised toow"
"I'm really sorry. ^^;;"
"No, please don't be. Everything's fine now that the misunderstanding's been cleared upw"
"But you were running after me with such a scary look in your eyesw"
"Did I look that scary..?"
"You didw"
and go on from there.
There should be a book and a motion picture of it now. I haven't checked them out yet though.
She should've at least heard about it. Besides, it's a nice story.
It'd be very interesting to see how she reacts when you bring up Train Man and 2ch.
|1/ |1/
／￣￣￣｀ヽ、
/ ヽ
/ ⌒ ⌒ |
| へ へ | But you were running after me with such a scary look in your eyes♪
/ |
/ |
（ ＿ |
（ヽ、 / ）|
| ｀`ー――‐''"| ヽ|
ゝ ノ ヽ ノ
￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
The whole thing feels way too unnatural to be true.
It just shows that >>1 doesn't have any talent for story writing.
In any case, he doesn't have a future as a writer.
Even if you put in a lot of work into it, shit like this won't survive longer than three threadsw
I like that.
However, she seemed to be quite prejudiced(?) against molesters, so that might be a taboo topic.
>>668
Hmm... Well, I'll try asking her when the mood is right.
This is VIP. All this shithole ever produces is shit after all.
This.
For now, I need to come up with an excuse to meet her again or I'll never see her again once the police matter is taken care of tomorrow.
That his character is different than Train Man is part of the trap.
Don't let yourself get fooled.
Don't let yourself get fooled.
Don't let yourself get fooooled.
"Being in a police station makes you nervous for some reason. Even if you haven't done anything wrong"
or
"All this because of a simple misunderstanding. I'm sorry."
or
"I'll only ask this once. Wanna do it?"
etc.
I might be able to use the first two tomorrow.
As for the third... Uho!
What happened to this guy?
Please use the same title for the next thread, so I can directly find it when I'm home, okay?
They talked about him on TV today at noon.
confessing his love to her tomorrow might just end up confirming her suspicion...
This is difficult...
Confessing his love? It's not even clear if he'll see her ever again after tomorrow.
And the story is way too forced and amateurish.
>>110
I lost my interest at this point.
Even if it was just a misunderstanding, you still scared the living daylights out of her, you know? I don't think you should act like nothing happened.
Just my two cents.
Just run into her "by accident" in that alley again!!!!
You know, like "Hey, what a coincidence!".
Nah, I'll be off to work in a few and I don't think I'll be able to post again until after meeting her tomorrow.
If someone doesn't keep this thread alive, it won't even live long enough for a second thread.
I hate to make someone else do the work, but could one of you guys post from time to time to keep it alive?
>>691
I honestly have no idea what she thinks of me.
All I know is that she feels bad for her misunderstanding.
It's possible she's trying to make up for it by asking me out for lunch.
And the story is way too forced and amateurish.
>>110
I lost my interest at this point.
- ・ -
' ヽ
|∧∧
( 'A`) Hang in there, Molester Man!
） ）～
（ へ
/
( ﾟ∀ﾟ)彡 Molester! Molester!
⊂彡
I think I'll go molest someone too tomorrow.
Title of the next thread:
[Molester Man] First time in VIP! Let's watch over the growth of a love part 2 [Miss Understanding]
Molester Man got mistaken for a molester by Miss Understanding!!
The battle for love between Molester Man and Glasses Man begins!!
Will Molester Man be able to lose his virginity?
How's this sound?
"Well, I'm so glad the police matter was resolved. I would have never thought that I'd get involved with the police...
Thank you for the wonderful experience, Miss Understanding.
...Even so, does something like this happen often to you, Miss Understanding? I guess it's not surprising since you're so cute.
You're so cute you sent me straight to the police station with one misunderstanding.
I almost felt like molesting you for real when that happened. Hahaha."
_ ∩
( ﾟ∀ﾟ)彡 To jail with you! To jail with you!
⊂彡
Then she'd be like "What's so funny about that?w"
And I'd be like "You little... Hahaha... Hahaha."
That way, you could show off your intellectual side. For example, when you're walking around town or having lunch with her, tell her whatever you know about anything you catch sight of.
This can buy you more time than you'd think.
And since the topic will keep constantly changing, you can avoid awkward silences in most cases.
"I'm sorry for suggesting such an unusual time to meet up.
I'm pretty flexible because I'm a university student. Was it really okay for you to meet up at 11 am?
I know you said it's okay yesterday, but if it did cause inconvenience for you, I'm sorry.
Ah, right, which reminds me, I heard in a lecture yesterday that having a tampon inside doesn't really turn on women even though they can get so thick. Is it true?"
etc.
And the story is way too forced and amateurish.
>>110
I lost my interest at this point.
Molester: "Ah, there's a Green General over there on the side of the road."
Miss Understanding: "Eh? A snake?"
Molester: "That's right. The Green General is a species of the genus Elaphe.
It's one of the famous and well-known species of snakes in Japan, but not many know that it's also widely known as an Asian snake species in America under the name "Japanese Rat Snake".
They prefer flat habitats close to human settlements to mountainous ones.
In mountainous places, you're more likely to find its relatives, the Japanese Striped Snake or the Tiger Keelback.
The Green General eats pretty much everything, but mostly small rodents, hence the name "rat snake".
Its color may look very plain, but that's because many breeders in Japan prefer to breed olive green ones.
It's one of the most common species of snakes in Japan after all.
The winter came suddenly this year, so we might get to see different hibernation patterns this year."
And I'm in the business administration department.
Truth is often stranger than fiction.
I'm sure things even stranger than this happen around us all the time.
Nice story, Reptile Man.
If I was Miss Understanding, I don't think I'd want to talk to you again.
You're standing out too much, tripfag.
The victim of my misunderstanding is my wife now.
Dude, that's your hobby you're talking about, not something you learned about in universityw
I wonder what women think of men who are into reptiles. Could be quite a gamble.
If I was Miss Understanding, I'd be swooning over you.
Isn't it easier to talk about the food in the restaurant and stuff..?
Miss Understanding: "Eh? Yamashita Kiyoshi?"
She didn't happen to be wearing a goth-loli outfit, did she?
Please elaborate.
Now I'm curious.
Hmm... I can't say much about her besides her calm manner and the hip coffee lounge she dragged me to.
Well, I know that I can't talk to her about reptiles.
If she asks me about my hobbies, I'll only mention the tropical fish. Not a word about computers and anime.
What about the color of her clothes? The material? The color of her (under)pants? The material?
If you keep telling careless lies like that, it'll come back to bite you in the ass later.
Never underestimate Glasses.
( ﾟ∀ﾟ)彡 Tits! Tits!
⊂彡
>>732
You sure post a lot for someone who doesn't have anything constructive to say, dumbass.
You make the next thread, got it!?
When this thread is at about 960 posts, start a new thread with >>702 as the first post!!
I can't start a thread, I have only restricted access right now, fuck!!
Let's see... She was wearing a light-green dress(?). The color was like that of an actias artemis.
And she was wearing a cute light brown shirt (a cardigan?) on top, I think...
Dunno about the material.
>>728
Don't worry, I won't tell any lies.
>>730
N-No way!!
then you obviously don't stand a chance.
http://tosakah-web.hp.infoseek.co.jp/photo00/0006/003327.jpg
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What kind of color would that be?w
thx
There's even the possibility that she's forwarding every e-mail from >>1 to Glasses.
I think so too.
Whoa, that's exactly the same thing an old classmate did to me.
"Miss Understanding, tell Molester that I can't come with you to the police station tomorrow.
I'll be watching Molester from the shadows tomorrow.
If he tries anything stupid, I'll come running to stop him and we can directly hand him over to the police."
So you better keep an eye out for what's behind you tomorrow.
Okay, I'll try to keep it short, but it's a bit complicated.
My car gets hit from behind. -> The culprit pulls a hit-and-run on me.
I lose sight of the culprit. -> I pass by a car that looks just like the car from the accident. (My future wife was driving it.)
I drag her to the police.
And well, they found out that I got the wrong person, I sent her a present as a token of apology later, she saw my phone number on the delivery slip and called me, I asked her out for dinner.
Now we're a married couple.
That... is possible.
I don't think she forwards all of my e-mails, but she might be telling him roughly what I write.
In that case, Glasses and Miss Understanding are well on their way of becoming the new Train Man and Hermes. Yeah.
>>744
That seems too far-fetched.
I mean, even if he came up with a plan like that, she doesn't seem to have the brains to grasp it and to execute it.
I don't think she's smart enough.
That's a great way to get to know your wife, good job!
What a nice way to get to know each other.
Even if she's as you say, beware of Glasses.
He's going out of his way to do all this for her even though the whole thing doesn't have anything to do with him.
What would you do if you were him? Would you still help her this much if she was an ugly landwhale?
Right.
Glasses will steal her from you like a thief at the scene of a fire.
I'm sure she asked Glasses Man to lunch too.
The probability is 120%.
"I was a little pissed at first when I got mistaken for a molester and even dragged to the police, but I really wanted to see you again. I like you."
she might even believe you and take you seriously.
Then it's all up to her to decide...
Glasses: "Miss Understanding, that man may not be a molester, but he obviously set his sights on you.
Listen carefully, Miss Understanding. If he sends you any e-mails, forward them directly to me.
I'll tell you what to do then. And you, Watari, please keep observing >>1
to make sure that he isn't thinking of Miss Understanding when masturbating.
But don't let him catch you."
As a matter of fact, you can't even deny the possibility that all e-mails from her today were written by Glasses.
Assuming that everything goes well, when we're about to say goodbye, I wonder if I should ask her something like
"Is it okay if we stay in contact?".
Or do I leave without saying anything about it and just keep sending her e-mails?
>"Is it okay if we stay in contact?"
That really depends on how well everything goes tomorrow though...
In the worst case, she'll get herself a new phone number.
Yeah, better ask that.
During the lunch tomorrow,
Miss Understanding's boyfriend joins her as her bodyguard.
The probability is 60%.
Nah, I think that's rather unlikely.
The first time she asked me out for lunch, it seemed like something she came up with on the spot too.
Well, this time, she might be planning on using me just to get on close terms with Glasses though.
>>755
Wha-What did you say!?
>>756
Wha-What did you say!? ΩΩΩ
>"Is it okay if we stay in contact?"
Don't. It's too straightforward.
Make it something like this:
"I know this great restaurant downtown. Let's go there together."
Yeah, maybe you're right and the lunch yesterday was Miss Understanding's own idea...
She might not be the type of person to plan ahead.
But that, on the other hand, would imply that every time she seems to have planned something beforehand, there was Glasses behind it.
Hey, why'd you stop posting altogether?
No need to take my post >>733 too seriously, manw
Your posts help lighten the mood in the thread, so come out and post again every once in a while.
If I hurt your feelings, I apologize.
I'm sorry!! ＿○／|＿ DOGEZA
>I'll try to not let it show, of course. And I'll try not to come on too strongly either.
Then this:
>I wonder if I should ask her something like
>"Is it okay if we stay in contact?"
Reading shit like this gives me a headache.
Be it a troll or whatever, this is sloppy work.
I'm surprised the thread got this many posts.
Dude, you don't have to be so hard on him.
Remember that half of nighttime VIP is made of kindness.
What's the other half made of?
(*´д｀*) pant pant
The attitude she showed Molester Man this time was pretty extreme. Even if Molester Man managed to get together with her, she might fucking stab him if he should ever try to break up with her in a clumsy way.
Might make for a funny story though.
I wouldn't want to get near a woman like her.
If this thread is still alive sometime between tomorrow afternoon and evening, I'll report back what happened.
I might post from my cell phone too if I get the chance to.
In that case, she'll have already smashed Glasses' glasses by the time she stabs Molester.
|1/ |1/
／￣￣￣｀ヽ、
/ ヽ
/ ⌒ ⌒ |
| （●） （●） | Do your best,
/ | Mr. Molester ♥
/ |
（ ＿ |
（ヽ、 / ）|
| ｀`ー――‐''"| ヽ|
ゝ ノ ヽ ノ
￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
:::::::,-‐､,‐､ヽ. ∠＿::::::::
:::::_|/ ｡|｡ヽ|-i､ ,-､ヽ|:::::::::
／. ` ' ● ' ﾆ ､ |・ | |, -､::
ニ ＿_ｌ＿_＿ノ ﾟr ｰ' 6 |::
/￣ ＿ | i i '-
|(￣`' ）/ / ,.. ヽ 、
`ー---―' / '（__ ） ,/ﾆニニ
====（ i）==::::／ /;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
:/ ヽ:::i /;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;
／(
／￣￣￣￣￣￣ ￣￣＼
|（ ＾＾ ）| < I'm going to bed!（＾＾）
|＼⌒⌒⌒＼
＼ |⌒⌒⌒~| Yamazaki Wataru
~￣￣￣￣
Posting to keep the thread alive.
If you get the opportunity to, you could say something like
"I caused Mr. Glasses a lot of trouble too and would like to apologize to him for everything, but I haven't been able to reach him."
to find out something about Miss Understanding's relationship with Glasses.
Afterwards, go home without saying anything about when or whether to see each other again. When you're home, send her an e-mail and thank her for the lunch. It should spark off a conversation which might lead to the next date if you're lucky.
Here's a little warning for your own good. My impression of Miss Understanding from your reports is that she's a bit mentally unstable.
You know, the type that loses herself in her own delusions and ends up cutting her wrists.
What's it got to do with him?
Another possibility is that Glasses is a 2channer...
In fact, he might be getting advice in some thread in 2ch like >>1 does.
Which would make this into some kind of proxy war.
Do your best, Mr. Molester Man.
foo
it'd be a complete rehash of Train Man...
I'd laugh my ass off if Glasses had his own thread though.
and Molester Man that of the drunk old man in the train.
.└┤│
.ﾉ 丶ハヽ
（ ( ) ) 。‘) <Good morning ♥
│| | |と ）
（ ( ) ）ﾉ
￣￣
Well, not like I mind as it won't interfere with the meeting today.
Anyways, I think I better try to get some sleep now.
This was a shameless self-bump disguised as a report.
| |. ∧＿∧
|＿＿＿| (･ω･` )
| Gloom | 〃/J J
|￣￣￣| し―-J
"""""""""""""
| |
| |. ∧＿∧
|＿＿＿| (´･ω･`) < Well, hang in there.
| Gloom | /J J
|￣￣￣| し―-J
"""""""""""""
foo
Miss Understanding wanted Glasses to come along to the police station today too.
Glasses doesn't have anything to do with this case anymore, yet he seemed willing to come along (he just didn't have the time to today).
Then why did she want Glasses to come along?
Was it really because she wanted to apologize for all the trouble she caused him?
And why is Glasses willing to come along?
Isn't it because he wants to see her again?
I'm sure Glasses and Miss Understanding have already agreed to meet up on a different occasion.
It's basically thanks to Molester Man insisting on meeting her alone that Glasses will get to meet her alone too even though he didn't do shit to make it happen.
I'm sure she'll tell Glasses later about her meeting with Molester today.
And they'll have plenty of opportunities to go on dates from now on.
It's like Glasses had this chance fall into his lap without doing anything for it.
He's going to be very grateful to Molester Man later.
Gets called every time even though his job is already done.
This is how the mind of a popular guy works:
"Why is she still asking me to come along? The case is closed, they shouldn't need me anymore"
↓
"Hmm... Maybe she wants to see me."
↓
"But even if that was the case, I already have a girlfriend. Guess it'll have to be an affair then.
In any case, let's say no and see what happens."
I'm not a popular guy.
Here's what I'd think:
"In any case, let's meet up with her and see what happens."
You sure that's what a popular guy would think? Sounds more like something a Mis(ter) Understanding would think if you ask me.
Or should I write all of it tonight?
You might find some of the following hard to believe, but well, just ignore those parts.
Let's start with when I got home after my night shift.
I posted in the thread, read the few posts I had missed and quickly went to bed.
Then at about 10 am, my phone rang.
When I picked up the receiver after crawling through my whole room, I saw that the call was from Miss Understanding.
I seriously wasn't prepared for it.
"Hello? (Falsetto)"
"Eh... Umm... Is that you, Mr. Molester?"
"Yes, yes, yes! (Soprano)"
"Umm... We said we'd meet up at 11 am, right?"
"Yes, in front of the station..."
"Are you still at home?"
"Yeah, well, there's still time... lol ← (Not a normal laugh like Haha, but the creepy kind like Hihi)"
By the way, it only takes me about 15 minutes to get to the station we promised to meet up at.
Last time, she just headed home on foot from my place, so her apartment shouldn't be very far either.
"Huh?"
"Well, your house is on the way to the station anyway and I didn't want to make you wait for me every time."
"Ahh..."
"Is it okay if I come over now? The police station should be open now, right?"
"Ah... hmm... probably..."
"Okay, I think, I will be there in about ten minutes then."
Suddenly I realized things were heading in a bad direction.
"Sorry, but I'm not quite ready yet! Could you wait like ten minutes before you head out?"
"Eh? Ah... Then I'll be there in 20 minutes, okay?"
"Yes, please!"
Meanwhile, I was trying to think about what just happened, but my still drowsy mind was going all kinds of places.
"Could it be that she's interested in me? Woohoo! Is this for real!?"
Her attitude towards me and everything about her behavior I hadn't been able to figure out so far was getting converted to something positive in my head by boundless optimism.
In short, I was getting completely carried away.
I got dressed in a hurry and was waiting for her, ready to leave, when the doorbell rang.
Ker-chak.
"Ah, good morning."
"Ah, good morning."
She was wearing different clothes this time (of course) and she looked extremely cute... Or it was just my hormones making her seem that way?
Looking back, I'm embarrassed I got my hopes up like that.
"Shall we go then?"
"Okay."
I went out feeling awfully cheerful. I'm just glad I didn't forget to lock my door.
At this point, I was seriously seeing the world through rose-colored glasses. What a fool I was.
"Have you had something to eat?"
"? You mean, for breakfast? I had curry with rice."
Since she somehow misunderstood the meaning behind my question, I said
"No... I mean, if you wanna have lunch later..."
"Ahh! That's right! Sure. Where should we go?"
"There's this place close to the police station..."
Props to me for casually talking to a girl like it's nothing.
My plan to wear only light clothes to avoid sweating was a great success! I was a little cold though... No, actually, I was freezing my butt off.
"Ah, there's something I forgot to mention. Mr. Glasses can come with us after all."
"HUH?"
I'm sure, this easily ranks in the top 10 biggest surprises in my life. In fact, I was so surprised I let out a voice like a 12-year-old boy that hasn't hit puberty yet.
I quickly regained my composure.
"Eh? But you said that Mr. Glasses is busy today..."
"Yes, but he called right after I sent you that e-mail yesterday to tell me that he had decided to join us after all.
I wanted to write you an e-mail about it yesterday, but it was quite late and I figured that you had gone to bed already."
"Oh... Really..."
I imagined myself opening up my 2ch browser and posting "How did you guys know? You guys are amazing." in my head.
Did you find out something about that, 1?
At the end of the stairs to the station, there was Glass-... But he wasn't wearing any glasses!! That bastard!! He had actually switched to contacts!!!
And he was wearing really stylish casual clothes too.
I don't know what it's called. Was it high-fashion? All I know is that it looked extremely stylish.
It was obvious I didn't stand a chance with my Uniqlo & Jusco outfit.
To be honest, I had already given up there.
I guess I shouldn't have kept pressing my dick against her body all the time. (´･ω･｀)
Like seriously apologized with a bow of 45 degrees and all. And not only once, but several times.
Seeing him act like that made me wonder if he's a salesman or something.
As for me, I was starting to feel stupid for getting carried away like that after a sleepless night.
"Let's just quickly go to the police, grab something to eat and be done with it..."
is about all that was going through my head at that moment.
About ten minutes later, there were no traces left of Glasses' humble and apologetic attitude.
And instead, he started talking to Miss Understanding frequently. Me? I was chopped liver.
I was reminded of the time when I had just started my part-time job and my co-workers were all having fun talking amongst each other while completely ignoring me. I remember feeling like running away.
Every once in a while, Glasses would turn around and ask me
"Mr. Molester, what about you?",
as if out of pity, but I'd rather he didn't and ignored me altogether.
The two started talking to the woman at the counter as if they were used to it.
That's when I suddenly realized that the police was still thinking of me as a suspect.
There seemed to be like two policemen that were in charge of my case and I'm sure they even went as far as running a background check on me and stuff.
For some reason, it was the police that were apologizing for all the trouble, not us.
To me, they didn't look like they really meant it though.
Maybe I was just seeing things because I was tired, but I felt like they were actually thinking
"Seems like you managed to talk yourself out of it this time, but you're actually a molester, aren't you? You fucking midget.".
I was thinking we'd just tell the police that everything's fine now and be done, but apparently there were a few more formalities left after all, so Miss Understanding went somewhere to take care of them.
So, there I was, all alone with Glasses.
I sweat a lot today and I really need to take a shower before I head out. You know, so I can feel like a human being again.
VIPPERs don't care if it's an impostor or the real thing.
This might be a clue Molester Man left us.
Let's try to figure out what he meant until 11 pm.
You're a genius.
M E G A N E S H
I think we can rule out the possibility that he sweat a lot because he had sex.
Meganesh.
But I can't help but hope for a late-inning come-from-behind victory.
Hang in there, Molester Man!
http://white.jpg-gif.net/bbsx/1/img/128797.jpg
ttp://www.uploda.org/file/uporg15894.jpg
Molester worked up a lot of sweat playing catch with Meganesh
Clash on the Glasses Bridge
How old is Glasses? Many women are attracted to older men, you know?
We already lost interest, don't you get it, >>1?
I bet it was cold sweat because they almost found out that he's a real molester.
We don't need another thread of this.
－－－－－－－－－－－－－Thread over－－－－－－－－－－－－－
In order to become the next Train Man, you have to respect the people in your thread...
I don't feel a shred of earnestness in your posts though.
Ohh! I'm glad you're back.
>>830
Shut up, pig.
_, ,_ POW
（ ‘д‘） ⌒ヽﾌ
⊂彡☆))ω´）WEE WEE =З
So Glasses came just as we'd expected, huh...
Here's what happens next:
While the three are having lunch together, Glasses and Miss Understanding announce that they started dating.
Then they tell him "You are our love cupid, Mr. Molester!".
And that's the end for this threadw
That'd be a surprisingly orthodox turn of events...
I already expect Miss Understanding and Glasses to hook up, so I'd prefer a more dramatic turn of events.
We don't need another thread of this.
－－－－－－－－－－－－－Thread over－－－－－－－－－－－－－
To be continued.
>>1 and Glasses and a policeman.
but now that I've caught up, the story's unfolding in real-time!
I was getting tired of waiting for you.
Welcome back!
With just the two of us left, we naturally didn't have anything to talk about.
I was interviewed or rather cross-examined by the police quite a few times with Miss Understanding around, but I had no idea where Glasses got interviewed and what kind of questions he was asked.
In other words, there was practically nothing directly connecting us.
Glasses was the first to break the awfully awkward silence.
is what he said IIRC. But I was too busy being heartbroken and could only give half-hearted responses.
Like "You're right...", "Yes." and "No.".
Yet it didn't keep Glasses from trying to talk to me. He seemed to be under the impression that I was extremely mad at him.
Well, I wasn't, but I guess it wouldn't have been strange if I was, under these circumstances.
If you look at it from his point of view, all he wanted was help out a woman out of good will, but it turned out it was actually one big misunderstanding and he was just throwing hostile and scornful glances at some innocent otaku.
Anyways, it felt like he was begging me for forgiveness.
Feeling bad for him and feeling annoyed at the same time, I finally told him
"Look, there's no need to try so hard. It's not like I'm mad at you, you know?".
His eyes popped out in surprise and he was like "I'm so sorry!". Then he started telling me his side of the story.
"I got off work early that day, you see? But then I suddenly heard someone scream and..."
Would you please shut up? Talking to people I don't know well makes me nervous, so please quit talking to me,
is what I thought while pretending I was listening.
Then after a while, Miss Understanding returned.
Fixed.
1 VIPPER 04/11/07 21:09:17 ID:Eu/zxK/m
Applications General Thread 8
http://tmp4.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/download/1099410418/105
105 Great_King_Naobayashi NANASHISAN 04/11/05 01:09:05 ID:19966145
I didn't copy the content of his post because it was something illegal.
Get over there and post in a thread that will go down in history!
"Eh, ah..."
Miss Understanding glanced over to me and turned silent.
Apparently it was something she didn't want to say in front of me. I'm guessing it was something like canceling her request for official documents needed in case she wanted to file a lawsuit.
Although we got to the police station earlier than planned thanks to Miss Understanding picking me up bright and early,
we had to stay a lot longer than expected because of the formalities and the clock had passed 12 when we left.
"Oh boy, all that's left now is having lunch with these two lovebirds, huh..."
is what I thought, but the two lovebirds seemed to be talking past each other for some reason.
As I was tagging along, I noticed how we were heading towards the train station.
"Huh? Are we going somewhere for lunch by train?"
I got suddenly worried, but since I felt like it'd be a mistake to ask where we're going, I kept my cool and quietly followed them.
As I was listening to their mindless chatter, we soon arrived at the station.
>"I sweat a lot today"
This is the key point here.
Glasses kept bowing his head in apology even after passing the ticket gate.
Huh?
"You're not in a hurry, are you? Shall we go have lunch?"
"Eh? Isn't Mr. Glasses coming with us?"
"Didn't I tell you? He has an appointment today."
"You did, but didn't he cancel it to join us..?"
"Ahh... I'm sorry, I guess I didn't put it clearly. Mr. Glasses delayed his appointment just to come with us today.
He felt he had to apologize properly to you, Mr. Molester."
Sorry, Glasses. I have misjudged you.
what to do what to do what to do
"Where are we having lunch? How about some place inside the station?"
Actually, I was planning on suggesting a pretty hip pasta place close to the police station (or rather somewhere between the police station and the train station),
but since going all the way back wasn't really an option, I didn't get to say the cool phrase I had prepared,
"I know this good pasta place. Wanna go with me?",
and instead said "Ah, sounds good to me. Then let's head to the restaurant floor.".
I'm such a loser.
Adios, Substitution Man!
I bet I'd say the same thing...
There were about ten restaurants, a family restaurant, a traditional Japanese one, a Sushi one, an omelet one etc.
I've been living in Tokyo for many years now, but as I practically never eat out, I didn't know there was such a big restaurant center there.
"I like this place. Can we have lunch here?"
she said pointing to a omelet restaurant.
Since I didn't have a particle of reason to decline, I went along with it.
What's there to say against a nice voluminous omelet?
but then I suddenly remembered how my old man used to say
"Real men don't take long to decide what to buy, they make up their mind in an instant and stick to it.".
So I directly gave my order to the waitress who came to serve us cold water.
But nowadays, such behavior is probably not considered "assertive" anymore, just "overly impatient and self-centered".
As a result, Miss Understanding was forced to order rather hastily.
I felt kinda bad about it.
What's with this sudden turn of events..? A joke?
In the middle of wondering about dumb stuff like that, I realized we had both gone silent for a while.
Crap, I have to start a conversation.
"There's no need to talk, I will never get bored just looking at you."
While this may be true for me, it's a completely different case if you look at it from her point of view. I can't imagine how anyone would enjoy staring at my face.
Though it might be kind of fun looking at my face and thinking "Urgh... His face is so asymmetrical. It's like the result of a Fukuwarai game.".
That's when she opened her mouth to say something and interrupted me in my thoughts.
This is what a reverse-troll does.
Such an ordinary thing to ask. But since Miss Understanding is probably a high school graduate, I could see why she's interested.
"There's circles, volunteer clubs and plenty of friends to make. It's a lot of fun."
is what I'd have loved to say, but as a resident of the "Thread for lonely guys who don't have any friends at university",
I couldn't say anything good about university life.
For me, it's just a horribly boring place I have to go to for the credits.
So, instead of campus life, I told her mainly about the education system and how it works. What in the world was I doing..?
Keep it up, Molester Man!
She's twenty years old, lives alone and is not the active outdoor type.
The more I heard about her, the more I realized that she's my ideal girl and I kept getting more and more excited and carried away by myself.
So I just kept bringing up all the topics I had prepared, one by one.
I don't know if it was all an act, but Miss Understanding seemed to be enjoying herself.
And me? I was having the time of my life.
Mine was HUGE.
Considering how filling egg dishes are, it was madness.
I understood why Miss Understanding had ordered the smallest size.
But as it isn't very becoming of a man to leave something on his plate (Dad's manly man theory), I prepared for the worst
and started chowing it all down.
If I had been a cooler guy, I'd have casually had some light conversation with her while eating my meal, but it was impossible for me.
The only thing to come out of my mouth was the mixture of saliva and omelet pieces flying everywhere.
All my attention went to pretending to drink water while using my sleeves to sweep all the pieces under the table.
MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH
While shoveling it in like a machine, I calmly thought about what to ask her next.
First, I wanted to find out what was going on between her and Glasses.
If he was my rival in this, I honestly don't think I'd stand a chance.
Even if he wasn't, if she had a boyfriend, it'd still be game over for me.
I decided to ask her about it once I was finished eating.
But I couldn't finish it.
Seeing the painful look on my face and the one fifth of the omelet that was left on my plate,
Miss Understanding said "There's no need to force yourself...".
I did as she said and gave up just like that. So uncool.
Where do you live?
Where is all this happening?
It's okay if you only roughly tell us where you are, like in the east or southwest.
My fucking sides.
So much for your manliness, huh... I'm disappointed in you and I'm disappointed in myself because I'm not much better myself...
"Miss Understanding, are you seeing someone right now?"
"Ehh? I'm not."
I pumped my fists (in my mind).
"Eh? But you're cute. Every guy must be after you."
"No, that's not..."
"But you've been the victim of stalking, right? It just shows how popular you are with guys, you see?"
"...............................................................I guess. (in a very small voice)."
OHHHHHHHHHHH FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK
You did it on purpose, tell me you did it on purposew
M E G A N E S H I S A G O O D G U Y
But whenever I emptied the glass, it got filled again. I drank it up in an instant, but the waitress was already on her way to fill it up. The waitress was a pro.
"Ahh... but you know, even Mr. Glasses is interested in you, isn't he?"
I somehow managed to avoid going over the cliff with a quick, sharp turn. Nice handling if I do say so myself.
But her answer was not what I expected at all.
"Ah... Mr. Glasses, huh?"
"Is something the matter?"
"I don't know what to think of him..."
??? I didn't get what she meant.
THIS IS STARTING TO GET INTERESTING
You never disappoint me, Molester Man.
Glasses is the guy that used to stalk her.
Do you really think that was nice handling?
Your handling was so nice you went right over the cliff.
That's it!!
Then his thread should be finished now too.
but it seemed like she didn't have a good impression of Glasses. Without any ulterior motives in mind, I got simply curious and asked
"Eh? Did something happen?"
"Nothing really happened, but..."
According to what Miss Understanding told me after that, Glasses keeps calling her and messaging her rather persistently.
I don't know if you can really call it persistent, but he kept contacting her even after she told him that it was all a misunderstanding and that she'd be fine now...
Or so she said.
Well, here's my two cents. I'm guessing, Glasses is just a very meddlesome person.
Maybe he does want to get on her good side too while he's at it, but more than that, I think he's the type that doesn't do a half-assed job once he's involved in something. The committee chairman type.
And Miss Understanding... She's just paranoid. Her trauma from the stalker incident must run very deep.
We don't need another thread of this.
－－－－－－－－－－－－－Thread over－－－－－－－－－－－－－
You can predict what will happen from a mile away.
They're all dumbasses, no exception.
So, Glasses was desperately trying to become Train Man.
They make a nice combinationw
I found myself defending Glasses for some reason. I said stuff like
"I'm sure he was just worried." and "You suspected me too, it just shows you're a very careful person." etc.
Our conversation was drifting into a strange direction.
With Miss Understanding talking to me about her stalker problem and stuff, I started feeling like a counselor or something.
But someone like me who's never been in a relationship outside of dating sims couldn't possibly be qualified as a counselor...
I still tried to give some more or less adequate answers though.
We're counting on you.
Lmao
I can't, I already made too many shitty threads today.
Here we go!
It was time for the finishing blow I had been working on since yesterday!
If I could pull it off, my likability factor would rise to the heavens.
All I needed to do was stress that I'm not mad at her at all.
Roar! Boomerang!!
"No, you see, it was just a bad coincidence that we were walking the same street. It's only natural to get scared in such a situation. There wasn't anything you could do about, no one really was at fault. You could say we just had bad luck."
K.O.
I could hear the sound of Miss Understanding's body hitting the mat.
Glasses had a serious case of premature ejaculation too, huh...
If you really wanna become Train Man, you have to be more of a coward.
Spend at least a whole day with your finger on the send button of your cell phone without actually pushing it.
Next thread is up.
That boomerang you just threw will come back to stab you in the end.
Thanks.
It's your own fault because you ran after her, >>1. (`･ω･´)
"You really aren't mad at all? How come!?"
No, how come you're still on your feet!? My blow must have hit all your pressure points...
Miss Understanding was getting completely carried away. She asked me what I think of relationships, overly considerate partners and so on.
She didn't leave me any time to think, let alone make the smart remarks I had come up with yesterday.
Time passed just with me answering all questions Miss Understanding kept throwing at me.
Thanks.
Thanks!
If this goes on for more than two threads, we'll know it's the real thing.
We don't need another thread of this.
－－－－－－－－－－－－－Thread over－－－－－－－－－－－－－
Why is she so annoying...
That can only mean one thing! Miss Understanding is Thouzer!
>>958
>Thanks!
>If this goes on for more than two threads, we'll know it's the real thing.
↑Samefag
Do you have any idea how many threads it took until Train Man was finished..?
You can't call it the real thing until it goes on for at least five threads.
Shit thread.
If >>1 is patient enough, he can win her over.
Just when I wanted to watch Gaki no Tsukai...
No need to get mad just because you're envious!
I mean I'm envious too...
>>1, hang in there! I'm rooting for you! (`･ω･´)
You're not a VIPPER, are you? Anything that manages to last longer in VIP than two threads is fucking great.
But well, if you feel like arguing with me, let me apologize beforehand.
I'm sorry I hurt your feelings.
Thanks.
Once she had calmed down, I had a look at the clock. It was almost 3 pm, time to go to work.
I had no choice but to excuse myself.
"I'm sorry, but I have to go to my part-time job now..."
"Eh? Really? When does your shift start?"
"Well, at 5 pm today..."
"I see..."
She looked somewhat disappointed. I decided to give another one of my cool phrases a try.
The situation was completely different than I'd imagined in my futon yesterday night though...
"Why don't we continue talking some other time? Don't hesitate to give me a call, I'm usually free anyway."
I seriously thought I got her this time. It was probably the second coolest thing I ever said in my life.
Hang in there!
That's kinda (･∀･) cool!!
WHAT THE FLYING FUCK!!!!????
Nice cliffhanger for the next thread, OP!
LOL
Made me laugh like crazy.
Nice end, isn't it?w
What is the meaning of her response?
"I guess" isn't really good, is it...
〒 ! + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
+ 。 | |
＊ + / / Yeeeeeehaaaaaawwww!
∧＿∧ / /
（´∀｀ / / + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
,- ｆ
/ ｭﾍ | ＊ + 。 + 。 + This thread has reached 1000 posts.
〈＿｝ ） | The next thread too will have... VIP QUALITY!!
/ ! + 。 + + ＊ http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
./ ,ﾍ |
bang ||| j / | | |||
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