Everyone in VIP, no, in 2ch, please hear me out.
The other day, I was totally mistaken for a molester.
And I don't mean it as a joke, I was actually mistaken for one in the blink of an eye.
It all started with this...
Previous thread:
I got totally mistaken for a molester part 10
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100517688/
Templates omitted.
http://tikanotoko.nobody.jp/index.html
↑ Go here for a summary of the threads.
and was spending a happy time with Kansai later that day,
Pork Cutlet and Coffee Lounge were enjoying themselves too.
But it just so happens that a miracle occured to me too on that day.
Since Molester Man is ignoring us right now, let me use this opportunity to tell you what happened.
On that fated day, I was out drinking with a good friend from university.
He suddenly asked
"Why don't we call some girls over?".
I was already pretty drunk, so I said
"I know one that lives around these parts."
and called a girl I'd exchanged phone numbers with as a formality a few years ago...
That phone call turned out to be the key to the miracle.
She sounded cheerful even though I called her out of the blue.
Me: "I'm drinking with a friend at ○○. Wanna join us for a drink?"
(My heart was pounding really hard as I hadn't talked to a girl for many years.)
She: "Eh!? That's like really close!"
Me: "Is that a yes?"
A short silence followed... And I thought to myself,
"I knew it, she's not coming... orz",
but she said something I'd never expected!!!!!!
She: "I don't want to go out, it's too cold out. Why don't we drink at my place?"
Me: "Really!? We'll be right there!",
I replied in a split second.
My friend and I bought some booze from a nearby convenience store and headed to her place.
I hadn't seen her in a long time, but she seemed to have cut her hair shorter and looked more grown-up to me.
She: "It's been such a long time!"
Me: "Sorry for the sudden call. I hope I didn't interrupt anything."
She: "No, it's cool. I wasn't doing much anyway."
We'd never talked much when we were at university, but we still hit it off.
Friend: "That lecture was so incredibly boring."
She: "I'd rather die than listen to one of his lectures again."
Me: "My sentiments exactly."
Our lively conversation was accompanied by heavy drinking, and since I've never been able to hold my liquor, I was soon completely wasted...
(My head hurts... I shouldn't have had so much to drink. What time is it?)
As if I wasn't confused and disoriented enough, I realized I was gripping something in my hand when I tried to get up.
I was holding her hand in mine!
And she had fallen asleep on top of my hand holding her hand!
(How the hell did this happen? Oh God, oh God.)
I tried to let go of her hand without waking her up.
AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Holy shit, the moment I let go of her hand, she moved in her sleep
and now her chest was pressed against my hand!!!!
This is bad, this is really bad, Mr. Tamori.
I have to get my hand away from her chest before she wakes up!
But hey, her boobs feel nice and soft.
That's when she woke up and our eyes met...
It's over... Or that's what I was thinking when she said
"You perv."
That's all she said.
Before I realized, I was already fondling her boobs.
First, from over her clothes.
Then I let my hand slowly wander under her clothes.
She blushed a little and said
"No, they're gonna wake up." in a small voice.
Her words sent what little reason I had left flying to my grandpa in heaven.
I started rubbing her boobs thoroughly and pinched her nipples.
Every time I touched her, she'd moan quietly as not to wake up the others.
I can't take it anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just when I was about to lose my mind, she suddenly grabbed my hand!
I figured I'd gone too far and wanted to pull my hand back.
But she guided my hand down to her crotch and whispered
"Look how wet you've gotten me."
into my ear.
She kept moaning quietly.
I inserted a finger and moved it in and out slowly.
Her moans became louder and louder.
I moved my finger faster and faster.
Her moans became even louder.
"Oh God! I'm gonna come!",
she shouted and stopped moving for a while.
"I came."
she then said with a smile on her face.
After a while, my friend and that other woman woke up and went home.
I, however, decided to stay at her place.
To have seicross with her, obviously.
"Great. You're making me want to do it again.".
She really said it.
Whoawwwwwwwwww OKwwwwwwwww
Mission accepted!
I used every trick in the book to get her off.
(Not that a virgin like me knows many tricks. I only know what I've learned from porn.)
She came again.
Mission accomplished! The next mission is insertion!
Or so I thought.
"Ah! I gotta go to work! Let me go take a shower."
she said...
Skip forward to the present, and all I've got left is the Pretty Cure ED playing on the TV,
an e-mail from my friend that says
"What the hell are you doing?",
and my lonely boner.
〒 ! + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
+ 。 | |
＊ + / / Yeeeeeehaaaaaawwww!
∧＿∧ / /
（´∀｀ / / + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
,- ｆ
/ ｭﾍ | ＊ + 。 + 。 +
〈＿｝ ） | That is VIP QUALITY.
/ ! + 。 + + ＊ http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
./ ,ﾍ |
bang ||| j / | | |||
〒＝! + 。 + 。 ＊
+ 。 | ﾟ|
＊ + / / Yeeeeeehaaaaaawwww!
∧＿∧ / /
（´∀｀ / / + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
,∠ヽ/＞ f
/=ｭﾍヽ. | ＊ + 。 + 。 +
〈＿｝ ）=o==ﾐ|
/:::::《:::::::(! + 。 + + ＊
./:::::::,ﾍ:::::::|
bang ||| j::::::::/ |::::::| ||| That is VIP QUALITY.
―――――――――――― http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
Fuck you, man, now I've got a boner too. GJ!!
That's amazing, mate! What happened then??
Let's keep this thread for side stories like that.
But Fingerfucker is a horrible nickname to havew
Then, when we were e-mailing later, she told me that she has a boyfriend.
However, she sent me an e-mail that said
"Do it to me again.".
Today, at work, I got an e-mail from her saying
"I'm free tomorrow and the day after tomorrow. Wanna come to my place?",
but I haven't gotten around to replying yet because I was at work all day.
Plus, I can't go tomorrow or the day after tomorrow because I have to work on both days.
orz
I wonder why.
Not that it matters as no one's going to read this anyway.
GJ!!!!!
Hang in there and try not to get caught by her boyfriend.
But man, the main thread is so ('A`) boring right now.
Let's call Pork Cutlet and Coffee Lounge over here too.
I can get behind this.
Pork Cutlet, Coffee Lounge, get in here.
Pork Cutlet: While recharging his cell phone, he got to know a fujoshi and had pork cutlets with her → ～Stuff happened～ → He scored with her seven times in two days
Fingerfucker: Went out for a drink with a buddy on the day Molester went to Shinjuku → ～Stuff happened～ → Made a girl cum with his fingers
A long time ago, when I used to work part-time at a certain supermarket, there was this girl who was the same age as me among the full-time employees.
One day, the girl told me and the other workers that she'd been getting weird phone calls lately and it was creeping her out.
According to her, it was some guy who kept calling her to ask
"It's you, Miss A, right? My name is K. We were classmates at S middle school. Do you remember me?".
Having grown up in the area, I obviously knew about S middle school. It was actually the middle school I went to.
She, however, was originally from a different prefecture, and her apartment wasn't anywhere near the school either.
The name A the guy mentioned was indeed her family name, but the first name was a bit different than hers.
But he wasn't completely off as the kanji in her name could be read like that.
>My name is K. We were classmates at S middle school.
K was one of those names you don't see often. If he claims to be classmates with Miss A, then he must have been classmates with me. After all, I went to S middle school too.
And there was actually a guy called K in my class back then. Could it be that the guy calling her was my classmate K?
So I told her
"The next time he calls, try asking him if he's KK (K's full name)."
And it actually turned out to be him... OTL
His number was on her caller ID, so I called him up with a friend from work and told him to leave her alone.
He never called her again.
I wonder where he got her name and number from. And how did he manage to get her first name wrong...?
The end.
No, I just suck at explaining.
To sum it up, a co-worker (girl) at my part-time job who was the same age as me kept getting creepy phone calls.
The strange caller claimed to be her old classmate, but actually turned out to be my classmate from middle school. That's the gist of it.
For some reason, he knew her cell phone number, family name, and age, but had her first name wrong.
He wasn't completely off though as it was possible to read her first name like that too.
Maybe he stalked her a little and got his hands on a cell phone bill of hers or so,
but then it doesn't make sense that he got her first name wrong because you can usually find furigana of names on documents like that.
Even if he got her number from some directory, he should have noticed from her address that she couldn't have possibly attended that school...
Come here if you don't want to get shit on for posting～
I'll be waiting for you!
I feel like something good will happen.
Or are we using that new thread?
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100761778/6-105
I think this one is next.
I think I better refrain from posting in the main thread from now on...
1 told me about the Beaujolais Nouveau Day.
1 replied "Like I care!".
2 were like "Hey, it's been a long time" which led to some small talk.
1 was sick in bed with a cold.
6 haven't replied.
1 has changed her e-mail address.
The conversation about the Beaujolais Nouveau Day ended instantly because wine doesn't interest me.
Thanks, I got it now.
THIS IS GOING TO BE RECYCLED AS PART 13 FROM THIS POINT ON
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Agreed.
>If this is 1000, Kansai suffers a bone fracture in an accident.
Molester, go save her!
It's hereーーーーーーーーーーーーーー
You gotta go to her, man.
(ﾉ∀`) Oh boy.
Hang in there, Molester.
If you guys really need a side-stories thread, you should start a new thread with an appropriate title.
>If this is 1000, Kansai suffers a bone fracture in an accident.
My bad, Molester.
Hurry up and finish your report so I can put my pants back on.
And you should post the rest of your report.
That wasn't all you had to report, was it!?
A man can dream.
I think everyone's still busy trying to figure out which thread is next.
I suppose he's not going to pick her up, is he?
"I was never after her, I'm serious."
"Even though you got turned down indirectly... You're a nice guy, Molester."
"You're making me blush."
"I'm doing it on purpose."
Moe.
"But I'm really grateful."
"What for?"
"I was afraid you wouldn't feel like helping Miss Understanding anymore."
"Don't worry, I'm not that cold-hearted."
They'll find this thread when it gets more posts.
I can't believe he decided not to pick her up after all she said...
ﾉｼ
The mood is rightｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰ
Dude, you're pretty good this time.
I did.
you're trying to clear yourself of the suspicion that you switched from Miss Undie to Kansai, aren't you?
I must admit, that's pretty clever.
"With everyone? We're not talking about shopping for clothes here. The other girls would be bored."
"Where were you going to buy them from?"
"Akihabara."
"...........................they sell them there?"
"Yeah, they sell a wide range of that stuff there."
"How come you know that anyway?"
OHHHHHHHHHHH SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP
He stepped on a landmineｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰ
This isn't good for my heart.
What's there to go OHHH SNAAAP about?
Even I know they sell stuff like that in Akiba and I never go to Akiba.
Molester: "Because I'm an otaku."
Kansai: "Creep."
Nice, very nice.
That's the kind of hijinks I expect from you.
Glad you're going back to being funny.
Guess someone like you can't really use the "I saw it on TV" excuse, huh?
You're so entertaining.
m9(＾Д＾) Pfffhahaha
"What kind of stores?"
"Maid cafes."
Depends on how Kansai sees it.
Akiba otaku detected.
IIRC she even said she doesn't find him creepy...
"Well, I told you I'm quite the otaku myself. I often go there to buy parts for my PC and stuff."
T-This is bad, this is really baaaaad!
I was in a complete state of panic when I answered her question. Just me being awesome as always.
"Ah, you did mention that. Akihabara is quite a ways though. Do you go there a lot?"
"No, no that often. Once a month maybe."
"Hmm. Is it true that Akiba is full of otaku?"
"Well, yeah..."
"So everyone there is like you, Molester, huh!?"
"You could say that, I guess..."
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
>You could say that, I guess...
What the fuck, no!
There are more posters of half-naked women there than in Kabukicho.
Just by the family name without any honorifics?
Why would you admit all that?wwwww
You really like that one, don't you?w
Will they ever go shopping for self-defense products or not?
Bad puns like that wheelie grind my gears.
Oh, I'm curious about that too.
Yeah, we all thought nothing new was going to happen today,
but then we used up an entire thread in a few hours.
"Huh? Did you arrive somewhere?"
"Hm? What do you mean?"
"I mean, I can't hear the rain anymore. You said you didn't have any lectures anymore, didn't you?"
"Yeah, I just entered the parking lot."
Oh crap. She's going to hang up on me soon. I still haven't found an excuse to see her agai-
"Okay, gotta hang up now. Thanks for helping me kill some time."
"Our conversation was just killing time to you?"
"Yeah, just killing time."
"You're cruel, sis."
Hurry, hurry, hurry, it's the Nanjing Lily.
Our hopes and dreams have been crushed. orz
That's just normies spouting their bullshit opinions.
A true VIPPER does not give a fuck.
But maybe it was a good thing that he didn't do it.
The End.
I bet I won't be able to keep up with the thread.
It sounded like she was taking her cell phone away from her ear to hang up.
"Ah, hold on!"
"What?"
"It's really dangerous to ride a bike in the rain, so be careful on your way home."
"............................................."
↑ I still don't get this pause here. I first thought the connection cut off for a moment, but I'm certain it wasn't that...
"Huh? Hello? Are you there?"
"Yeah, I'm here."
"Ah, okay. Well, just be careful on your way home."
"...thanks."
"See you."
"Yeah."
So here I am, having accomplished practically nothing in the end.
One of them will always be too busy or something.
Whoaw
It's over, man.
Why do I feel so lonely? The last time I felt like this was after watching the last episode of Tokyo Love Story...
We're putting you through the wringer in our review meeting tonight.
And it feels really nice being wrapped in Kangaroo skin.
ttp://ranobe.sakura.ne.jp/futaba/src/1094911940514.jpg
I don't think it's that she doesn't want it. Maybe she thinks it wouldn't be fair to Miss Undie?
In other words, something is keeping her from accepting her true feelings, I think. It's what I want to believe, at least.
I know what I'm talking about because I'm still experiencing after-effects from getting knocked off a scooter once.
Yeah, I mean, he asked Kansai out,
and she suggested going with the others.
In other words, she doesn't want to be alone with himwww
I know. I ride a bike too.
That's why you should have picked her up, no?
Tell me about that.
I tried to ride over a manhole cover on a rainy day once, but got totally mistaken for a molester,
no, totally lost control of my bike, and injured myself badly.
What are you trying to do? What is your goal anyway?
Isn't that being a little too optimistic?
／": : : : : : : : ＼
/-─-,,,_: : : : : : : : :＼
/ '''-,,,: : : : : : : :i
/、 /: : : : : : : : i ＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
r-、 ,,,,,,,,,,、 /: : : : : : : : : :i ／
L_, , 、 ＼: : : : : : : : :i ／ I think picking a girl up
/●) (●> |: :__,=-、: / ＜ is for losers.
l ｲ '- |:/ tbﾉﾉ ＼
l ,`-=-'＼ `l ι';/ ＼ Molester (24, male)
ヽﾄｪ-ｪｪ-:） -r' ￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
ヾ＝-' ／ /
＿＿＿_ヽ::::... ／ ::::|
／￣ ::::::::::::::l `──'''' :::|
Wouldn't it be safer if she walked home?
Once, I was riding at 60 km/h,
and hit the brakes to stop at a red light,
but I just slid right into the junction...
There's nothing you can do to prevent something like that, even if you have handling skills like Molester.
Maybe so, but it's the only explanation I have for her "............................................." reaction.
Like I said, it's what I want to believe.
"It's really dangerous to ride a bike in the rain, so be careful on your way home."
"............................................."
(I should have just asked him to pick me up instead of lying about the bike...)
"Huh? Hello? Are you there?"
The only explanation I have is that she was annoyed with him.
Same here.
No idea what was really going through her head though.
She said she's going to ride her bike home. What's the point of picking her up if you don't even have a car?
Even if she went home by train, she'd have to take the train again the next time she goes to work.
And she'd have to leave her bike at university for at least one night, you know?
Do you really expect Molester to go pick her up despite all that?
Anyways, you'd have to be stupid to make her wait for Molester just so he can pick her up when she could be home by the time he gets there.
Well, she did say "...thanks" after the pause.
Whatever was going through her head, let's hope it was something positive.
But wouldn't that be too sad?
Or rather, isn't that being a bit too pessimistic?
This so much.
Am I the only one who imagined Kansai removing her cell from her ear to look at the screen and make a "Eww, what a creep!" face?
He IS annoying though.
Who cares if he walks or takes a train to pick her up?
If I was OP, I'd have done it. And I wouldn't have cared if it rained or not.
I'd have taken a shower, dressed up, and picked her up.
There's no way an attractive woman like her doesn't have a boyfriend.
You have no idea how women tick.
When it comes to love, women stop caring about stuff like their bike or how to get to work the next time.
And I like to think that Kansai was in that kind of mood just now.
The real reason was probably something insignificant like
she had to put her cell phone away to do something,
or got distracted by something else for a moment or so.
Isn't that just the Kansai in your imagination?
"What?"
"It's really dangerous to ride a bike in the rain, so be careful on your way home."
"......(Wow, this guy is getting on my nerves.)"
"Huh? Hello? Are you there?"
Pattern 2:
"What?"
"It's really dangerous to ride a bike in the rain, so be careful on your way home."
"......(Wow, Molester is such a nice guy... Huh, what is this feeling?)"
"Huh? Hello? Are you there?"
You seriously sound like a stalker.
2 is out of the question.
Maybe not annoyed, but she's probably be like "What do I do with this guy...".
I wouldn't go if she told me not to, obviously.
But she said "......thanks" right after that, so she must have heard him.
then take a train to the nearest station to Kansai's place, so he can accompany her from the station to her place.
And somewhere on the way, he can have dinner with her.
>How do I get rid of this guy...
FTFY
It's fine to be worried about someone, but there's no need to wave it around and shove in that person's face.
OP's made it more than clear that he's worried about her.
That "..."thanks" was in response to
"Ah, okay. Well, just be careful on your way home."
though.
Guess I'm the only one who thinks Kansai is starting to fall for Molester...... orz
"Molesters at Waseda University"
http://www.tanteifile.com/diary/index2.html
Would you call someone after e-mailing with them for an hour if you didn't like them?
If I'd been Kansai, I wouldn't even have e-mailed with him that long.
And then there's the silence in >>128.
Molester's line must have hit her like a body blow.
From now on, make sure to focus on Miss Understanding's stalker problem.
The point is to make Kansai wish you'd care more about her.
In other words, play hard to get.
I know you can do it, OP.
I can almost see it.
The moment you knock Kansai out.
What's with the meaningless line breaks?
Would you please refrain from inserting a blank line after every line when your post isn't even that interesting?
It sounded like she was taking her cell phone away from her ear to hang up. (She's busy shouldering her bag.)
"Ah, hold on!"
"What?"
"It's really dangerous to ride a bike in the rain, so be careful on your way home."
"......(I can't answer right now.)"
"Huh? Hello? Are you there?"
"Yeah, I'm here." (Jesus Christ!)
"Ah, okay. Well, just be careful on your way home."
"...thanks." (Ahh, what a pain. Guess I'll play it safe and thank him.)
"See you."
"Yeah." (Sigh. Fucking finally.)
I kept looking for some hidden message in your post, but couldn't find one. You're not trolling, are you?
Do you really mean it?
Too many line breaks.
In that case, her parents must have told her to be careful so many times that her ears hurt from hearing it.
So, when Molester said it too, she felt like screaming "I know!!" at first, but swallowed it and went "..............." instead,
and then said "...thanks.".
>Would you call someone after e-mailing with them for an hour if you didn't like them?
I agree with this part, but I doubt that she's starting to fall in love with him.
It's more like she's just happy she found someone interesting to chat with.
At the moment, I'd say she neither finds him annoying, nor does she like him romantically.
They're somewhere between acquaintances and friends right now.
Absolutely.
Ignore the VIPPERs, they're just jelly.
You might want to take my opinion with a grain of salt though. I'm just a virgin.
but I would suspect it was just the formal kind of "thanks" you say out of politeness.
Aren't you just projecting your ideal girlfriend onto Kansai?
Are you from the Jeans thread?
What are your thoughts on that silence, Molester?
I don't get why she'd go out of her way to call him if she already found him to be annoying when they were e-mailing.
It's not like Molester asked her to call him. She did it of her own accord.
Quit using so much space in your posts. They're not even that interesting.
Shall we move on to the review of the e-mail conversation now?
Molester, could you answer the question in >>109 please?
When I checked the thread before heading home, it was still at part 12 with 20 or 30 posts.
Now it's part 13 already!!
That's some insane growth there.
Well, realistically speaking, it was probably just the connection going fuzzy for a moment,
or her looking for her keys or something.
Maybe Kansai got annoyed sometime during the call?
She even said "Okay, gotta hang up now." near the end.
The truth is often sadder than we think.
Me → Kansai = Family name without honorifics
Kansai → Me = First name without honorifics
Oh, okay, if you say so. You're the one who talked to her, after all.
What about the "......" in "......thanks" though? What are your thoughts on that?
Why don't you send an "Did you get home safely?" e-mail later?
Oh wow.
ITT: We analyze the meaning of the "......".
This is a no-brainer.
"Kansai is starting to fall in love with Molester in the heat of the moment now,
but give her a moment to think about it calmly, and she'll realize that you switched awfully fast from Miss Undie to her."
Keep this in mind when you go after her.
She calls you by your first name? There's still hope, I'd say!
Make it a short e-mail though.
I wish a girl would call me by my first name too.
That's exactly the kind of thing that would make OP annoying!
I know it's a nice gesture, but if you overdo it, it'll just come off as very annoying.
I'M NOT EVEN JELLY
If Kansai feels like continuing the e-mails tonight,
she might send something like "I'm home now." later anyway.
I am jelly.
She was about to get on her bike, man. Of course, she said "Okay, gotta hang up now.".
Most people say that before hanging up to check if the other person has something else to say.
She's probably called him by his first name from the start though.
In any case, try calling her by her first name too, Molester.
I believe it's his Mr. Nice Guy act.
He should hide his kindness somewhere no one can see it.
Well, she's probably going to be fine. But if she does have an accident tonight,
OP's going to be sorry he didn't go pick her up for the rest of his life.
Man, you're stubborn.
If she answers the phone, just say "Ah, I see you got home safely. I'm glad. That's all I wanted to know. Good night." and hang up.
Stop jinxing himw
To me, it looked like Molester was just trying to hide his embarrassment because he's not used to getting compliments.
I don't think it's annoying... Am I just weird?
That's because you're both still kids.
But if Molester were to hide his kindness, he'd just come off as an asshole.
But if she doesn't, it means all hope is los-
I don't care if he was trying to hide his embarrassment or not. To her, it's just annoying as all hell.
He should wait for her to write an e-mail when she's home.
OP, send an e-mail and give her a call.
She has no interest in him as a guy, or else she'd act more like a woman around him.
She would already be so nervous she couldn't even talk to him properly.
Molester has been friendzoned by Kansai a long time ago.
I know this, mind you, because I know a woman who's a lot like her...
One does not care to acknowledge the mistakes of his own youth...
Where is the hidden message in your post? I can't find it.
// |:!
//,. -/r‐- ､| !
/,/ ./ | _」 ﾄ､
/.＼`/ |二...-┘ ヽ
. i ,.>､;／ｰ- ､ l
! ∠..＿;'＿＿＿_＼ |
,!ｲ く二>,.、 <二＞｀＼.､ヽ. Damn it! Is that Molester a monster!?
／'´レ--‐'ﾉ. `ｰ---- ､ |＼ ヽ、
＼ `l (!" Jfヽ! `''-;ゝ
`‐､jヽ ヾﾆﾆ> ﾞｲ" }_,,. ‐''´
`´＼ ｰ ／ ,ィ_}
. |_ `ー ''´ ＿｣'
＿,.| ~||｢ ￣ 人|､.＿
,r=＝;"´ ヽ ﾐ|||彡 ／ ` ｰ`＝=､-､
. ///,ｲ ＿＿_ ヽ|||_,,. ‐''´＿＿＿ | | | |ヽ
Ah, there you are.
So, what are you going to do now?
E-mail her? Call her? Do nothing?
Kansai
has
already
friendzoned
you
Kansai has already friendzoned you.
Goddammit, get off me! I can't even type in peace!
He told her to be careful on the phone several times already.
Plus, Kansai will contact him sooner or later if she cares enough about him.
Some of them were even created by Kansai herself.
SO WHY WHYYYY
Because he's still a kid.
I've been waiting for a chance to post this.
That was ages ago.
talking to her about Akiba, anime, and shadow seicross with 2D girls
won't change a thing now, will it?
I guess everything we had agreed on got resetted when the Miss Undie route died.
They want him to protect her when she's in danger.
I really like the expression "shadow seicross". Has a cool ring to it.
I mean, if she did, wouldn't she have asked them for help too?
Or am I just stupid?
Maybe they wanted the expert opinion of another criminal?
Kansai does have other male friends, doesn't she? I remember OP posting something to that effect in one of the past threads.
Miss Undie, however, doesn't have any male friends.
That's why Kansai wants OP to help Miss Undie cure her androphobia.
I posted this yesterday night too.
Or is... my imagination getting out of control?
That's because you're reading his posts with the Substitution filter on.
○ Molester
Japanese people are said to think that it's smart to not show their feelings openly.
Don't worry, friend, I too think that Kansai is starting to feel attracted to Molester.
Well, we'll find out if we're right or not soon enough anyway.
That's because you've been playing too many eroge.
Sounds like a cool name for a racehorse.
Is Molester having shadow seicross with Charlene again?
Crabs, aim at the most intense molesters...! Hit them!
Playing eroge after my wife's gone too bed is the only pleasure I have left in life!
Wait, do you use Charlene every time you masturbate?
They were boring.
I hope you turned off the silent mode this time!!
Why don't you e-mail her?
OP IS NOW TAKING A ONE-HOUR BREAK
--------------------------------------------------
It's time to prepare for the next one.
A rough estimate would be enough.
Do you think she's gotten home by now?
It's been an hour and a half since she hung up. She must be home now......... orz
Wouldn't it be a waste not to?
We need to review today's e-mails first though.
Remember how he told us they're going shopping in Shinjuku to mislead us when they actually went to Harajuku?
He's a pretty careful guy, so I doubt Yamaoka is her real name.
Well, not that I mind because it means more fun for us.
http://news13.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news/1100643012/l50
I got startled for a moment there, but Kansai should be a bit younger than 23.
I've never asked her about her age though.
Btw, I find Futakoi pretty interesting. It has this old-school moe anime vibe going on.
This is the first time I see someone saying it's interesting. I think it's shit.
You seem to have yet to watch an anime that's really shit. Try watching "Kakyusei 2" and "To Heart" this season.
You'll start to think Futakoi is a masterpiece after that.
Reading about him makes me a lot more jelly than reading about Pork Cutlet and the others.
It's my honest opinion.
But well, don't count your chickens before they hatchw
But damn, so many new posts.
I don't think he's in love though...
He just wants to have seicross with her if possible.
Of fucking course.
Don't even try to compare Futakoi with them though.
Me saying Futakoi is interesting is like praising an ace in Little League,
while Rozen Maiden and Mai-HiME are like top aces in Major League.
The guys over in the Live board seem to think
Kakyusei 2 (because bad voice acting) ≧ To Heart >>> Futakoi
though. Though there's also Horie Yui in Futakoi...
Oh okay...
A pity because seicross is just an added bonus to a relationship though.
What do you know about me?
Btw, aren't you going to join an anime club in university like in Genshiken?
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
Still no e-mail or call from Kansai?
Was an atomic bomb dropped there? Are their parents Vietnam veterans or why are there only twins?
After rereading the whole conversation calmly, I must admit Molester's e-mails and phone call were a bit annoying to say the least.
Be grateful that Kansai kept you company this long, but this is the end of it...... I advise you not to get your hopes up if you don't want to end up hurt.
Especially if you haven't had a girlfriend for a very long time.
and checked my cell phone expecting hundreds of new posts,
but it was only thirty something and I've just read them all. What now?
Ahhh! My sweet Kansai! Fuck.
but I realized I still don't know shit about her.
Do we even know what Kansai's hobbies and interests are?
[Pork] Recharger Man [Cutlet]
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100786403/
What did you make that thread for?
while there's nothing but antlion pits around me... ＿|￣|○
There's one in your imagination.
Raise her with all your love.
"About the self-defense products, why don't you get yourself one too?"
and see how Kansai reacts.
I'm only a freshman in high school, but I bet she'll be either like
"I don't need one!" or like
"What? Are you worried about me?".
Btw, I've only skimmed through the old threads, so someone might have already suggested the same thing before me.
Wait, were you planning on buying one for Kansai anyway? I'm getting confused.
Kansai: "Good idea. I'll need it when you start stalking me, Molester."
Go reread the threads 50,000 times before you come back.
by Mizuki Ichirou.
(`･ω･´) toss
（つ と彡 ./
／ ./
／ ./
／ /
／ /
／ /// / ﾂﾂｰ
／ ● /
／ ./
↓
Summon me again later, okay!?
Yeah, many of them air in the same timeslot too, so I'd miss half of them if I didn't have two recorders.
Today, for instance, I have to record Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha and Rozen Maiden.
Tell her you love her and get some results already.
Unless this thread is your blog or something.
But this is the blog of Molester Man and his Merry Friends.
I wouldn't be so relaxed if there were any new e-mails, man.
I'd still be watching anime though.
It can't be helped then.
Normally, I jerk off before going to bed, but I guess it can't hurt to snuggle up to my wife every once in a while.
I fear things are going to be calm for a while.
Do people seriously enjoy watching this?
Sorry... I just don't see the appeal of it.
orz
Molester's next move will be on Saturday. Until then, it's going to be e-mails only.
Mai-HIME? I looked it up and it looks like I missed it... orz
I'll check it out next week!
Thanks for the recommendation.
Kansai calls you by your first name?
THAT MAKES ME HARD AND PISSED AT THE SAME TIME
Btw, I've got a test tomorrow. Uh-oh.
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
but the Kansai in my imagination has transformed into the character in Mai-HiME that is voiced by Tamura Yukari.
and because she's just sociable like that, huh? But what if it's more than that?
Provided that your reports depicted Kansai's words and actions accurately,
she's probably in love with you.
T-True story?
What happened to cramming for the test?
I think so too. What are we waiting for anyway...?
Tell her you love her. You do love her, right?
A simple "Sorry, but I love you."
worked on the Kansai in my imagination.
I was cramming for it while watching anime, but then I remembered I have an assignment too,
which made me lose what little motivation I had left, so I just started browsing 2ch instead.
Now I'm too tired. I'm giving up on the test. The assignment too.
Yeah, don't worry about that. I feel like, if I give up on her now, I'll have given up on the meaning of my existence as a male lifeform for the rest of my life.
But even disregarding that, I simply don't want to give up on her.
Well then, for a better tomorrow... I'm going to bed!!
All that's left is to pull the trigger. Don't get the timing wrong though.
To me, it looks like you're just desperate for a woman's touch.
As long as you get some, you don't really care with whom, do you? Just save up some cash and visit a brothel.
Read >>387 one more time.
If that doesn't help, go back and reread everything from part 1.
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
as that couple that robbed a bank the other day.
I bet OP is going
"Fuck, I haven't studied for the test at all!!"
right now. He won't get much sleep either. I think we're cut from the same cloth.
Hope something good happens today too.
You can say that again.
>>395
Fuck, I haven't studied for the test or finished my assignment!!
>>396
Aquarius was the 6th luckiest sign in the weekend horoscope. Neither lucky nor unlucky.
>>397
I don't mind if I do, but I don't have anything to e-mail her about.
If I were to seriously do that, I'd be just some weirdo and she'd be like "What is wrong with you?".
The question is, should OP push harder now, or take a step back and wait for Kansai to come on to him...
Nah, nothing wrong with sending something short like
"I got a test today. Wish me luck! ｐ('A`)ｑ".
With that said, good morning, everyone. ﾉｼ
Target subject: Molester
Measurement date: 2004/11/18
Call the police Creep Acquaintance Friend Love
├──────┼──────┼──────┼──────┤
↑
Here
Caution: Watch out for the hidden flag that turns "Love" into "Creepy otaku"!!
Kansai: "Huh? You had a muffler?"
Molester: "Yeah, I bought one because it's getting cold."
Kansai: "From Uniqlo again? Is it warm?"
Molester: "Warm enough."
Kansai: "Oh okay......... But I was knitting one for you. (in a very small voice)"
is what happened in my dream last night. Good morning, guys.
All of America cried.
Not that it makes a difference to any of us.
That's the Kansai meter seen through Molester's rose-tinted glasses.
Kansai meter
Target subject: Molester
Measurement date: 2004/11/18
Creep Acquaintance Friend
├───────┼───────┤
↑
Here
The truth is probably more like this.
I see what you did there. Your Kansai meter doesn't even go up to "Love".
I fucking lol'd.
You can't just get rid of the "Love" rank!
The best OP can do is become a friend? That's harshw
Man, I wish I had a friend like her.
But that is only because he wanted to help Miss Undie even though she turned him down.
OP's relationship with Kansai will be over as soon as OP starts to ignore Miss Undie.
Wouldn't it be better to e-mail Loli and Miss Undie too?
You're a pretty good guy.
If only Molester was a bit more... ahhh...
But now that Kansai and Loli were added, I'm honestly starting to envy him... Lucky bastard.
That means, you're in love with Molester.
I wonder if Molester is taking his test now.
He really needs to take studying a bit more seriously,
and become a better person in general before Kansai gives up on him.
No, I'm in love with Kansai.
I only know about her from Molester's posts on 2ch, but she seems like a keeper...
This thread could really need a new event though. When OP was falsely accused of being a stalker, Molester was a pretty important person in the girls' lives,
but now, I feel like he's just an acquaintance like any other. I know it's better than being a stalker in their eyes, but still.
There is a new event, or at least something new, almost everyday though.
The only problem is that I can only check this thread at work and on my way home after work,
so I'm never here when it happens... orz
Agreed.
Btw, Molester could have gotten so much more out of the e-mail conversation yesterday.
Even though Kansai made it really easy for him, he never even once tried to expand the conversation.
If only he was a little better at conversing, I believe he could easily go from acquaintance level to friend level...
That's why he needs us, his friends he's connected to via electronic wires.
Oh yeah, he suddenly decided that we're his friends, didn't he?w
Well, if he really thinks that we're his friends, he should listen to us more. Seriously.
I lost count on how many times he made me facepalm in front of the monitor.
So many times we've given him advice and he fucked it up anyway by going berserk.
>I don't know much about bikes though. I just got it as a present.
But then again, she said this, so maybe it wouldn't have helped.
And we love Molester for it.
asks the thread for advice → does what the thread thinks is right → gets stuck →
thinks about what to do by himself again because asking the thread didn't help → does what he thinks is right → gets stuck → rinse and repeat
I said we'd leave conversations with Kansai to Molester because I thought he's better at them than us,
but I had so much to complain about in his e-mails yesterday.
I wonder how many times I posted stuff like ask her what model her bike is, ask her out for dinner, go pick her up, switch places with me, etc.
Oh, you're that guyw
If things look good, we root for OP, if things go well, we're happy for OP,
if OP goes berserk, we enjoy it. This flexibility is VIP QUALIT-
But it was good that he didn't go pick her up yesterday, wasn't it?
Because she had her bike with her.
Otherwise, it would have been a good idea.
We say OP's going berserk whenever he doesn't do what we want him to do. I prefer to just sit back and watch him do his thing. You guys should try it too, it's nice.
I hate it when Molester goes berserk because I can't relate to him anymore.
Those who want something funny to happen and those who actually give serious advice.
I'm sure the latter is a dwindling minority.
High enough that they can make a few mistakes but still make it to the finish line.
You guys have to keep in mind though that Molester is just a Honda Super Cub, in bike terms.
The smallest mistake can be fatal for him.
If Molester can keep this up, he's going to have a fun Christmas party this year.
Speaking of which, have we VIPPERs ever accomplished anything with our advice?
You're probably rightw
So far, every abrupt story development was caused by OP. I want us BIPPERs to be responsible for the next one!
Good luck with your test.
>The smallest mistake can be fatal for him.
I bet, if it had been anyone else than Kansai, he would have long been blown off by now.
Which is why I want Molester to go for a homerun at the risk of a strikeout.
Fuck infield hits to second base.
(Btw. this only applies to Kansai.)
Only one month left. I need to do something.
30 minutes left until the test!!
>>444
Yeah, I feel like the only losers on 2ch are the guys in the anime and otaku boards.
Everyone else seems quite well-adjusted.
219 VIPPER sage New! 04/12/24 19:22:08 ID:KIyo4KO+
You better get going now, Molester. The girls are already waiting for you, aren't they?
224 Molester Man ◆FYqCtG1B42 New! 04/12/24 19:24:11 ID:HoLyniTE
>>219
Yeah, I'm about to head out.
>>221
I know. I'm going to tell her everything today.
Okay, guys, I'll be off then. ﾉｼ
227 VIPPER New! 04/12/24 19:24:30 ID:3Ta96+Su
Kill yourself.
232 VIPPER sage New! 04/12/24 19:24:41 ID:tO7KAi/3
>>224
Hang in there! I wish you a wonderful holy... no, horny nightwww
We'll be waiting for your report! (`･ω･´)ﾉｼ
Good luck with your test.
And then I go:
451 Molester Man ◆FYqCtG1B42 New! 04/12/24 19:24:11 ID:HoLyniTE
Chicken! We're having chicken!!
652 Molester Man ◆FYqCtG1B42 New! 04/12/24 19:54:54 ID:HoLyniTE
Everything's going perfect so far...
I'm posting from the toilet right now. I'll try to keep you guys updated...
758 Molester Man ◆FYqCtG1B42 New! 04/12/24 20:45:51 ID:HoLyniTE
Guys, I'm gonna do it.
Thanks for all your help so far!!
986 Molester Man ◆FYqCtG1B42 New! 04/12/24 22:01:00 ID:HoLyniTE
The Kansai route is over.
Fuck it. They expect me to know about sigmas and shit now?
The last time I had to deal with math was is in my first year of high school.
I blame the more relaxed education policy in Japan in recent decades.
It's my school's fault that I can't even have a normal e-mail conversation.
They always talk about how modern youth is so used to indirect communication like e-mails that they can't communicate face to face anymore,
but forget about face-to-face communication, I can't even into indirect communication.
>>456
You want me to write cute e-mails? How would they look like?
Hope dies last .
You can do it if you try etc.
Hang in there.
Holy shit, your words have woken me up...
Even if it might be too late now, I'm going to study as hard as I can!!
So OP was invited to their Christmas party?w
No happy end?wwww
Let's make it a Christmas to remember.
Just a thought I had.
I lost it at "Kill yourself.".
If you get too greedy, you might lose her as a friend too, you know?w
Why don't you ask Kansai to introduce you to a girl instead?
Well, they're not even lovers yet.
That's not what I meant.
ttp://bb-guide.tv/syosai/2002/08/01/photo/105-1.jpg
ttp://www.tv-asahi.co.jp/roomnumber/030405/matsumoto/800.jpg
ttp://www.tv-asahi.co.jp/roomnumber/030802/409_matsumoto/800.jpg
ttp://www.apsylus.com/art/rpgfanart/rikku.shtml
ttp://www.andrew.cmu.edu/user/jjchiang/images/rikku.jpg
ttp://006.tenkuu.net/006/art/oldart/rikku.jpg
ttp://www.h3.dion.ne.jp/~splan/gallry/rikku.jpg
ttp://www.h3.dion.ne.jp/~splan/gallry/rikku.jpg
ttp://connerieland.free.fr/Download/Wallpapers/16%20A%2020/FFX-Rikku.JPG
ttp://homepage2.nifty.com/t-tamutake/cg/marika.gif
ttp://www.kikki.co.jp/2004cl/img/04cl104o1a.jpg
ttp://kakuchan-web.hp.infoseek.co.jp/marika_03.jpg
Gonna be on family duty?
Let's organize a party to comfort him! We could all post something like "Congrats on flunking the test!" when he comes back.
Are you going to be working?
Molester, you're not going to have to repeat the year, are you?
Anything but that, please.
I just hope he doesn't start touching his reptiles... That'd be inhumane.
Wow.
OP's ID is perfectw
I didn't even notice until you said it.
You're really perceptivew
I'm a little disappointed there aren't that many new posts to read since I posted at the beginnning of my lunch break.
>>480
Whoa, I totally missed thatw
And I've finally caught up with the thread.
Anyways, is an event going down tomorrow?
Let's try to come up with a plan.
How long is your lunch break!?
From 1 pm to 4 pmw
What kind of company do you work at...?
How does your company survive?w
I run an orthopedic clinic.
Ahh, I see now...
Wait, you're a private clinician!?
What are you doing on 2ch if your lunch break is over!?
Yeah, I have to be really careful that my patients don't noticew
Like right now.
I wish my job was like that.
It was a serious question, you know?w
You can do whatever you want during your lunch break, but how can you be still here after your lunch break?
I'd hate to have you as my doctorw
What? You don't browse 2ch during working hours?ww
Well, I'm usually doing home visits during lunch breakw
I'd given up on it because I thought I had to memorize all my notes, but the questions were all about practical knowledge.
I think I got almost all of them right!!
I guess miracles do happen.
Also, my new goal in life is to become a private clinician now.
Dude... It's nice that you're happily telling us about your test,
but you really need more real-life friends than just Kansai.
You know something isn't right when you're posting on 2ch like you're talking to your friends.
You would have flunked it if it was about theoretical knowledge, but you aced it because it was about practical knowledge?w
Isn't it normally the other way round?
Did you just call out everyone in this thread?
Add "I had a test today..." at the beginning though.
Ever since grade school, I was really bad at tests where you had to study and memorize stuff, no matter how simple they were.
Like math tests. Even if I put some effort into it, my grades were never any good.
But I was always pretty good at tests in subjects you can't really prepare for like Japanese.
>>499
This. Aren't we all friends in here?
No, that wasn't my intention.
What I meant was, and sorry if I offended you, Molester, but
>>496 sounded to me like you're talking to your classmates or something.
Did you get home safe yesterday?
By the way, I had a test today, and it was really easyw
I'd given up on it because I thought I had to memorize all my notes, but the questions were all about practical knowledge.
I think I got almost all of them right!!
I guess miracles do happen.
My new goal in life is to become a private clinician now. Just joking."
E-mail her this.
Rektw
I'm on my way home right now, so please make sure something interesting has happened by the time I get there!
orz
My e-mails are usually about that long......
Okay, send only the first two lines then.
Keep in mind that I e-mail her from my cell phone, not my PC.
I'm not sure if it'll fit in the character limit...
Send a snake pic!
It's like a greeting to start a conversation. You decide which pic to send.
Nah, that's nowhere near the character limitw
The first two lines should fit just fine.
If a pic of a snake is enough to creep her out, I'd think twice before inviting her over to your place.
Don't you know anything? Pfffhahaha
I wouldn't send a pic of them if they're huge.
Do you have an example pic?
Post pics of your snakes, OP. Let's see them snakes.
How about this? OP posts pics of his snakes here, and we VIPPERs decide
whether it's okay to send them to Kansai or not.
Though I have to admit it'd be pretty cool to have a corn snake.
I can give you one if I get a successful breed next year.
Snakes have big, round, cute eyes, after all.
It'd only look creepy if you can see their whole body in the pic imo.
As for the e-mail, I'd add the line
"This guy is my only friend."
to make it even creepier than it already is.
I only wish corn snakes stayed small.
If you want to send Kansai a pic, make it a close-up of a snake's head.
I tried googling for "corn snake breed", but didn't get much...
ttp://plaza.rakuten.co.jp/gerud02
I wish they were about this big.
I don't think OP meant a different species when he said "breed".
No wonder I only got pics of insects.
Molester, what kind of snakes do you have?
He obviously meant breeding. Thanks.
A western hognose snake
A cream silk corn snake
↑ These two are adults
An anery stripe corn snake
↑ This one is still a baby
I sometimes play with the adult corn snake when it's in the mood for it.
They talk about "breeders" a lot in TV commercials, for example.
Aren't you glad you learned something new again?w Not to mention on VIP of all places.
How did you get rid of them?
Did you throw them away?
you mainly keep corn snakes, huh?
It's nice of you that you'd even give one to me.
I'd of course pay you if it came to that though.
Corn snakes even change color, huh? Very intriguing. There's only one problem though.
I'm keeping rabbits right now. orz
So, what are their names?
Are you crazy?w
I couldn't afford to keep them all, so I auctioned some of them off.
You heartless otaku!
I was afraid you'd thrown them away.
Even so, selling off living beings doesn't feel right to me...
I guess it is better than throwing them away.
I used to keep a lizard once, but I don't know anything about snakes. What do you feed your snakes?
| | | : : : : │: ::|: : : ｜ /ニニ ,,lﾞ: ::,!: ../ │ :|: ﾞl
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.| .| | : : _,,-'"｀ ￣ﾞ:i/: .,／: ./:: : lﾞ
│: : |: 丶 'ﾞl、 : ｀i､／ : : :/:::: :lﾞ
'|｀｀'-|: : 丶 ﾞi､''ﾞ,,ﾆﾆﾆﾐ' / ,ﾆﾆﾆ､、 |: : :_,,／.:: :│ Did you call me?
│､: : ＼、:ゝ ﾞlﾞ（、 ◎ ,） ｜ （ ◎ ）' ￣i'‐ : : : : :lﾞ
lﾞ │: : ＼、: :/ ￣￣" : 、 '￣￣" ／: : : : : :lﾞ
.| .":|: : : |ﾞl::`￣' l .／: : ::: : : : :,
.| lﾞ │ﾞl::: : : .､,,_ _,,i､ ＼::::::::::::: : :,|
I only sold them because I couldn't afford the feed and the light/heat/electricity bills anymore.
I basically gave them away at a dirt-cheap price.
But well, they weren't very rare or expensive to begin with, so I probably couldn't have sold them for much more anyway.
Everything adds up if you think about it like this.
Where is this? Who am I?♪
I just... can't......... nope...
But well, I'm a guy who jumps at the sight of a snake 20m away from me.
OP seems to be holding back for some reason.
Aren't you going to e-mail one of the girls today?
Get the fuck out of VIP.
Reading this blog made me want to get a snake too. orz
Do people really think you're creepy when you have a snake...?
Get out of here before I end you, normalfag.
Send her this first.
Then, send "Sorry, wrong person." right after it.
That should get a conversation going.
Hilarious.
That's a good one.
That's it!
"Huh?w Wrong person? You don't have anyone else you could write an e-mail tow Was it on purpose?"
Raise your hand when you've e-mailed the "wrong" person on purpose before!
It's probably funnier if you make it obvious that you did it on purpose.
Just make sure your e-mail is easy to reply to.
"Huh?w Wrong person? You don't have anyone else you could write an e-mail tow Was it on purpose?"
If this is her reply, chances are good she likes you.
Pattern B:
"Okay."
If it's this, it's pretty much hopeless.
Something like this should be easier for her to reply to:
"Just got out of a test. I think I guessed 80% of it right."
Maybe I should have some ramen on my way home. Haven't had a sumptuous dinner in a while.
So you guys think I should send an e-mail?
I don't mind, but don't blame me if nothing interesting comes out of it.
Send the first half of this post and scrap the second half.
Target subject: Molester
Measurement date: 2004/11/18
Love Friend Acquaintance Creep Call the police
├──────┼──────┼──────┼──────┤
↑
Here ♥
Molester, let's try to get close enough to her that you can e-mail her everyday.
I'm sure there are women who find guys e-mailing them everyday annoying, but I doubt Kansai is one of them.
What do you think, Molester? Do you think she'd be annoyed?
I know, send it to the whole family restaurant squad!
No ulterior motives involved, just good old playfulness.
That's it.
Can you take pics with your cell phone?
If yes, send a close-up of a body part of one of your snakes with the caption "Guess what this is.".
Then talk to her about your hobbies and interests.
Good idea.
To keep it going, he could ask her if she got home safe yesterday, and then tell her about his test today.
>ramen
I feel bad for OP now...
that OP only takes our advice into consideration in his first e-mail of the conversation.
So yeah, guys, the first e-mail is our time to shine.
If she doesn't reply... oh well...
Like "Wanna have some extravagant ramen with me?".
Train Man was like a romance novel,
while this is more like a dating sim.
Someone please confirm.
"This is the fanciest dinner I can afford.
......please treat me to something better sometime!
By the way, are you free on Christmas Eve?"
What do you guys think?
Don't do it.
Btw, if Molester were to send an e-mail now, he'd be the one to send the first e-mail again (yesterday and today).
Which is something we should try to avoid at any cost.
I doubt OP will get an e-mail from Kansai though.
That's coming on too strong, I think.
I don't see anything wrong with e-mailing her to tell her his test is over.
Yeah, I doubt it too.
I know Molester has to make a move, but I just don't know if it should be tonight.
After all, she only e-mailed him back yesterday because her friends had skipped the lecture and she was all alone.
I guess we can't expect him to have so much luck again today, can we?
It was a different situation then.
Now, stop complaining and send "SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP" to Loli Jugs!
I guess not.
Even if she does reply back, Molester's e-mail skills are so lacking it won't last...
I did a quick check and it looks like he never said his cell phone had no camera...
Sorry for the confusion.
You asked that question a few times before, didn't you?w
And OP ignored you every time.
I think you're mistaking me for someone else.
Ohh, cool.
Not the first time I see this bug, but I'm impressed you found it.
Nice find!! And >>570 made me crack up so hard.
What did he do to my Kansai meter...
I replied to the post just in case and got lucky.
I was wondering why the "Love" and "Call the police" labels were mirrored when I saw his post.
Now I know why.
I don't know... I posted it 2 or 3 times... I guess it IS me you're talking about then, huh?w
No. OP calls her Kansai because she seemed like she's from Kansai at first.
We can't rule out the possibility that her parents are actually from Kansai though.
Thank you for the kind warning. I'll be careful from now on.
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
We believe he's having a sumptuous ramen dinner at the food section of Jusco.
Or did something happen to him?
Guess I'll head home then.
Laters. ﾉｼ
Do you seriously think that that e-mail conversation was an indication for Kansai's feelings for Molester?
It was a normal conversation, nothing more... Idiots like you are the reason women think men always misread signals.
only to realize it's one of those days when nothing happens in the thread...
I heard Kimura was surprisingly okay.
Apparently, the voice acting for young Sophie was much worse.
My older sister went to watch it yesterday.
Please elaborate.
Or did he already send an e-mail?
Aren't you going to e-mail her today? Mononoke Hime is on right now,
so why don't you send "Mononoke is so good." as an opener and then ask her out with "Wanna watch Howl's tomorrow?"?
The soup wasn't too strong in taste, had a consistently light flavor, and came with straight noodles,
which are getting harder to come by these days. I don't think I need to tell you how well straight noodles go with lightly-spiced soup.
Personally, if I had to complain about something, it would be the thickness of the noodles as I prefer my straight noodles thinner.
However, the overall taste and the equally good aftertaste more than made up for it.
When I took my first sip, I was like "Huh? Isn't the taste a bit too strong?" for a moment, but with the second and third sip, my tongue gradually got used to it,
and the pungent smell characteristic to seafood broth quickly changed into a delicious flavor that made my mouth water.
All in all, it was neither too oily nor too heavy, and before I knew it, I had sipped the soup all up down to the last drop.
If Kansai should ever get annoyed by your e-mails, tell her you got carried away because you haven't had a friend in ages.
Send that as an e-mail to Kansai.
I've been meaning to tell you this. You're really good at writing food reviews.
"Eww, you were serious when you said you don't have any friends!? What a creep!!"
If the last e-mail from her is something like this, I'll hang myself.
I'd say the first one resembles her face the most.
I myself prefer Laputa.
Miss Undie doesn't have many friends → She doesn't get many e-mails → Her inbox is full of Molester's e-mails → She gets annoyed, right?
In Kansai's case, however, Molester's e-mails only make up a tiny fraction of the vast amount of e-mails she gets everyday.
You lack playfulness.
Dude, Howl's going to premiere tomorrow. Ask her out, man.
They're showing Mononoke Hime on TV right now. The timing is perfect.
he just... wouldn't be the Molester I know... and love anymore.
What do you think about this, Molester?
topa-ma
topa-ma
OPA=MA
Meh, I don't know about that...
Your attitude towards Kansai has changed so much compared to last weekend...
Ohh, that's what I was thinking too!
I completely agree with you, bro.
But OP keeps ignoring us...
、ゝし刈'/／r-
＼ﾍYY/／
(ヽ))/) ∩
,. --─ '彡=ﾟ∀ﾟミ 彡 ＜ Riding my bike, I'm on my way to you
/ ｼシ ⊂彡
|〈 （ ミミﾐ彡彡
| ,） /｀ー--ミミﾐ彡`
/〈,,,,// {,,,ﾉ,,ﾉ
）LL ）LL
"What? He's going after you next, Kansai? Doesn't he have any integrity?w He must be getting desperate because he's still a virgin." "I wonder if I look like an easy woman to him..." "Well, he asked you out for the weekend." "I'm going to passw He's not any fun to be with and I don't want him to get the wrong idea either."
But well, it's just my imagination, so please ignore me and keep going.
Holy crap, your post is hard to read!
It's because you're posting from a cell phone, isn't it?
Are you that addicted to 2ch or what?
You're one to talk. I saw you spamming in that abandoned thread earlierww
But well, I did too.
Target subject: Molester Man
Measurement date: 2004/11/18
Love Friend Acquaintance Creep Call the police
├──────┼──────┼──────┼──────┤
∩＿＿＿∩ /)
| ノ ヽ ( i )))
/ ● ● | / /
| ( _●_) |ﾉ / Here right now bear
彡､ |∪| ,/
／ ヽノ /´
Here's how this post shows up in the mouseover post preview of a 2ch browser:
Kansai meter:
Target subject: Molester Man
Measurement date: 2004/11/18
Love Friend Acquaintance Creep Call the police
├──────┼──────┼──────┼──────┤
∩＿＿＿∩ /)
| ノ ヽ ( i )))
/ ● ● | / /
| ( _●_) |ﾉ / Here right now bear
彡､ |∪| ,/
／ ヽノ /´
I'm sure everyone here with common sense realizes it. Though I doubt the girls talk like your average 2channer thoughw
The ones who keep going about how Kansai is in love with OP just want to see him get him rejected.
In your dreams. ＾＾
Teehee.
Kansai meter:
Target subject: Molester Man
Measurement date: 2004/11/18
Love Friend Acquaintance Creep Call the police
├──────┼──────┼──────┼──────┤
∩＿＿＿∩ /)
| ノ ヽ ( i )))
/ ● ● | / /
| ( _●_) |ﾉ / Here right now bear
彡､ |∪| ,/
ヽノ /´
He should know it best, right?
Look carefully.
↓
>>669
Sorry, I'm in a toilet stall of a karaoke bar browsing 2ch on my cell phone because karaoke is a pain in the ass.
I guess I'll go back to lurking then.
Maybe Kansai actually feels annoyed by OP and his e-mails,
and maybe the inconspicuous Miss Yamaoka fell in love with OP at first sight and we will never know.
That's just how it is. The only way to find out how Kansai feels is asking her about it in a serious tone.
Though I doubt that Molester has the balls to do something like that.
Give it up. There are no hidden messages in this post.
Samefag detected.
Learn to use a specialized 2ch browser.
Oh, come on!
Wrong thread.
Ignore my post. orz
Kansai: "So I'm your partner?"
Molester: "But of course. It can only be you, Kansai!!"
Kansai: "Because we're the only friends you have, right?w Why don't you ask Loli to become your partner?"
Molester: "I told you I have countless friends... And out of them all, I chose you, sis."
Kansai: "You're making me blush."
Molester: "I know."
Made my heart skip a beat. I want to believe it made the needle of the Kansai meter shoot up too.
>>669
>>669
>>669
>>669
>>669
Before you go after Kansai, become friends with everyone in the family restaurant squad first.
Try to come up with an e-mail brimming with playfulness that you can send to all of them at once.
I'm one of the people who seriously think that Kansai is falling in love with Molester,
but I've never even once wished for Molester to get rejected.
Love can't be rationalized, you know?
Is it really fun to love someone with your head?
Are you really that scared of getting hurt, Molester?
All my life, I've tried to keep a cool head and stayed in my comfort zone.
And now I regret it all.
To all of them at once...?
SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP
But I'm sure they do tell each other when they get an e-mail from OP.
Miss Undie is friends with Kansai, so if you change your attitude too suddenly,
you can't expect Kansai to trust you anymore.
I've never confessed my love to a woman in my life either.
Thinking back now, I had the chance to 4 or 5 times. OTL
But what's past is past. The next time I fall in love with someone, I'll be sure to tell them how I feel.
Molester, thinking won't get you anywhere. Do what your heart says.
Man, that's an awful lot of P's in your ID.
Gasp!
You mean they're laughing at me and discussing how to get rid of me behind my back?
It even says 3P at the end... orz
Kansai is still under the impression that Molester likes Miss Understanding, so the worst thing he could do now is make a move on Kansai. It's too early.
You say love can't be rationalized, but it'd just make her think that Molester is desperate for a girlfriend and would go after any girl.
I've always confessed my love too early and got rejected everytime though...
You should only confess when you know for sure that she loves you. I had to learn it the hard way.
And the only reason I did something embarrassing like that is because I'd heard that women are more likely to divorce if you don't propose to them...
I guess not from the looks of it.
Please read >>687 carefully.
I'm not samefagging.
If you don't want to become a 25+ year old guy without a girlfriend like me,
then you better take those words of advice to heart.
But I was talking about those guys who always say no to everything, you know?
Guys that are too phlegmatic and big-headed.
I'm just saying it wouldn't hurt if OP was a bit more passionate about this.
read >>694.
>>694
Ignore them, they're just jealous.
I am too. This is like a real-life version of Strawberry 100%...
No, I'm not jealous. All I'm saying is that you can't just follow your heart blindly.
But first, would you care to explain how Molester's situation is anything like that manga?w
It's a shitty manga. No idea if it's still shit since I stopped reading Jump a while ago.
You might like it if you're into dating sims though.
Yeah, that wouldn't hurt... if Kansai and OP were middle-schoolersw
But they're both adults, and love between adults is all about mind games.
And I dare say that the most enjoyable thing about a relationship is the time building up to it.
Molester is somewhat prone to going berserk and has made his share of mistakes, but he can be pretty smooth like in >>682 too.
I know OP taking it nice and slow can be a bit frustrating to watch for us bystanders, but this is a very crucial phase, wouldn't you agree?
Oh, shut up, your chin is sticking out.
There's the fact that he's got his own harem of cute girls. I wish I had one too.
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100873151/
OP's taking it nice and slow? Isn't he trying to settle it as quickly as possible now?
Not that I mind if that's what he really wants. It's more entertaining for usw
If he really wanted to take it nice and slow, he'd have stayed in contact with Miss Undie instead of dropping her like that.
It's like she only serves as an excuse to get closer to Kansai now.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying OP should throw caution out of the window and go for it now.
Some people in this thread keep saying it's out of the question that Kansai likes OP.
All I want to say is, how do you know? You don't.
How do I put this... On one hand, you have OP who doesn't have any experience in love, and on the other, you have Kansai who's serious about love,
I don't think either of them really cares for mind games when it comes to love.
Take the Kansai in my imagination, for instance.
She likes Molester, but doesn't think of him as a love interest. If he were to confess to her now, she'd start feeling awkward hanging out with Molester, and wouldn't be able to talk to him so casually anymore.
If Molester wants to date Kansai, he should try to maintain the status quo until Kansai comes to the realization
"Ah, maybe I like Molester...".
Damn, since when I did I start writing such long posts... I must be getting old.
All we can do is show OP his options and comfort him if he picks the wrong one.
The Kansai meter is just a guess of the poster, so there's no need to take it apart every time.
Whether Molester should go for it now or not is not up to us to decide.
Only Molester himself can decide if he wants to regret trying or regret not trying.
In any case, let's just watch over him and see if Molester Man can cause a miracle and lose the "Molester" to become a "Man".
Look at all these VIPPERs seriously racking their brains for you.
I'm so happy for you I almost shed a tear of joy, little bro. (´Д⊂
As a VIPPER, you have to be able to... express your thoughts in short and simple language.
I bet we're more worked up about this than him even though we're strangers.
Meanwhile, Molester is ignoring his wonderful friends to have shadow seicross.
Now that's something I can reply to in short and simple language.
"He's just a lazy bum."
Really? When I post my opinion, the people here usually ignore the first AND second half of my post.
I've never seen Molester join us when we're discussing something seriously.
Even if he does, he only replies to completely unrelated posts.
I agree with the second half of your post.
I've said this before, but I don't think the Miss Undie route is as hopeless as Molester makes it out to be.
She seemed interested enough during their phone calls.
I think, it's just Molester making it look like that with his reports that are obviously biased towards Kansai.
he doesn't think that he ignores them
because he reads every single one of them.
At least, I hope he does.
But well, Molester's feelings are already leaning toward Kansai.
In any case, it's better if he's only got one target.
I think it's too early to limit himself to only one girl.
He should hang out with all of them until Miss Undie's stalker problem is taken care of.
I fear OP will completely ignore Miss Undie if he decides to go after Kansai.
And if that happens, he might lose access to all routes...
Wouldn't it be awesome if we VIPPERs could all enter Molester's mind together and control him?
We'd fuck up Molester's life in five minutes.
ttp://www.ent-club.co.jp/tigermas.htm
I want OP to ask Kansai out to this movie shoot, so they can be all lovey-dovey by the time the movie comes out.
And then I want them to go watch it together.
Sounds like fun.
Or else we won't be able to help him at all.
Does he want to make Kansai fall in love with him or not?
Because our advice will be completely different depending on that.
The same thing can be said about the other girls though...
It's Molester we're talking about here. He might end up pushing her off the cliff.
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
Unless the stalker makes a move soon because then we'd have our new event.
or before he knows it, they'll be like
"Oh right, there was a guy called Molester, wasn't there?".
He needs to become a part of the family restaurant squad.
leave one fifth of it on our plates.
Oh well, the only question is if there is an unexpected side to Molester that could win Kansai over.
Why didn't you e-mail her today...?
>Oh well, Molester can ignore us all he wants, it'll never change the fact that he himself is getting ignored by Miss Understanding.
>Oh well, the only question is if there is an unexpected side to Molester that could win Kansai over.
But well, I'd still prefer it if Molester got stabbed by the stalker instead.
I feel like he would actually get his harem end.
"I'll draw whatever the second post requests thread"
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1099321524/468
"I'm a 20-year-old waitress, and my nickname is 'Loli Jugs'. Please draw me."
ttp://news4vip.ath.cx/up/vip1523.gif
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
I couldn't be arsed to until now, but just now, I finally brought myself to binge read it from start to finish.
At the end, I was very moved like pretty much everyone else who read it before me.
But to be honest, Train Man's last few posts about how he almost had sex with Hermes made me cringe...
When I'd finished reading, I was like "Whew... Haven't read something this good in a while.",
but I regained my composure after a while, and figured "I bet many think it's made up though.",
Having checked out a few Train Man verification sites, I am now convinced that a lot of it is definitely made up.
Whatever actually happened, if any of it actually happened, must have been dramatized and spiced up a lot. It's really creepy if you think about it...
what I'm trying to say is,
Molester Man's story seems a lot more realistic to me compared to Train Man's.
Maybe it's just because I'm following it in real-time though.
And,
provided Molester isn't making this all up, and he doesn't get tired of reporting back to us,
this is probably going to continue for about as long as Train Man.
In short, hang in there, Molester! Hang in there!
Princess Sayako announced her marriage
Russia to return two islands to China
Yokota Megumi's photos turned out to be photoshopped
Chinese submarine entered Japanese waters
Hanshin Tigers signed a 15-year-old
First-grade student killed in Nara
I tried to act cool at work and ended up acting cold towards the girl I have a crush on again...
Morning, downer.
Tomorrow is another day.
Dude, looking up Train Man verification sites after reading Train Man is like
googling for photos of a manga artist after fapping to his H-manga.
and I bet he himself couldn't even tell you if all of it is true.
After all, a person's memories are prone to distortion.
If it's unintentional modification like that, I'm sure Molester Man is no exception.
But that's what good about stories like that.
I'm not a downer... I'm normally a cheerful guy...
But when I'm in front of her, I can't help but put on this cool mature act to hide my feelings...
She happens to be pretty witty too, which is why we end up arguing all the time. Guess we resemble Molester x Kansai in that aspect...
I assume OP didn't e-mail anyone yesterday, huh?
Oh well, not that it's a bad thing since a tactical retreat can be important too sometimes.
As a VIPPER though, I wish OP kept on pushing forward.
>>769
pant pant
First things first, check your e-mails.
Have fun and hang in there. Try not to go berserk or to come on too strong.
"Are you already up, Molester?
Did you get the rice and Lipovitan I sent you? Please reply."
is what it said. I'm going to reply "I got them, thank you, mom".
I'm in love.
I guess mothers are the same everywhere.
http://www.iris.dti.ne.jp/~minzu/ripoD.jpg
Is that a Lipovitan cell phone charm? DO WANT.
I'll be back around noon.
Mom...... How am I supposed to wake up in time for school?
She said she'd love to wake me up every morning,
but then I'd never learn to wake up on my own.
She said it was a tough decision.
She said "I'm sorry".
Even though I'm the one at fault.
You're a horrible son!!
How hard can it be to wake up on your own?w
Yeah.
More importantly, weren't you going to go shopping for self-defense products today, OP?
Nah, Molester's story is just as fishy as Train Man's.
You don't have anything planned anyway, do you?
Kansai must have a BFF outside of that group.
Well, it's entertaining, so I'm not complaining.
Molester, has Kansai replied yet?
Or did you get another call?
"Pork chops 100g 65 yen!!"
And I just got back from the supermarket. I couldn't pass up on it.
Are you going to make miso soup with pork or something?
Of course not!!
You expect me to e-mail her when I don't even know what to write!?
Plus, it's a 65 yen pork chops! 65 yen only!!
There was a long line in the meat section when I arrived!!
If I'd arrived half an hour later, it would have been sold out. No doubt about it.
>>817
Soup is a pain to preserve, so I'll probably just fry it.
Like >>818 said, why don't you become buddies with Glasses?
I don't think I will. I mean, why should I?
>>819
No, SATY is a lot cheaper when it comes to food.
and add "...that's when I woke up. Good morning." at the end.
If she complains about how long it is, reply with "But you said my e-mails were too short!".
"I bought some really cheap pork today!!"
Like that? Great idea. Will do.
But you posted in >>807 that you'll maybe send an e-mail.
Desperate like "If Miss Undie doesn't like me, then I'll just go after Kansai instead!".
But guess what, Kansai doesn't like guys without integrity.
And if that doesn't work either, this thread is over.
This thread would have to go on for ages for thatw
If Miss Yamaoka doesn't like him back either, OP ends it all by sending one last creepy e-mail to all of them.
It's not like that...
So, what are you going to do today?
Are you going to make a move or not? Please just tell us that.
>>Molester
>>825 So, did you send it?
An e-mail about pork...
She doesn't care much for Molester.
You're supposed to become friends with the whole family restaurant squad first. And stop neglecting Miss Understanding.
He stopped e-mailing Miss Undie since he heard she's annoyed by his e-mails, didn't he?
Please elaborate.
Did you send >>825 just like that?
Or did you add something?
"Just bought some super cheap pork at SATY.
Guess I'm having fried pork with ginger the next few daysw"
is what I sent.
I wouldn't know what to reply.
What makes you think this time will be different?
If she replies, that is.
I bet she's like
"So what?" right now.
No one told you to send an e-mail about pork.
Don't blame your lack of common sense on us!
Hurry upーーー!!!
Don't lose to her, Molester! Go have shadow seicross now!!
Your post made me want to go back to my hometown in Hokkaido. Haven't been there in a long time.
This is VIP. I say, deal with it.
>>859
I can't win! How am I supposed to compete with the real deal!?
Shadow seicross can only get him so far.
He should spar with Loli Jugs.
Or... were you talked into subscribing? (;´Д｀)
What are you talking about!?
Don't you get that you're embarrassing yourself!?!?
Apologize to Mr. >>855 already!!!
.........don't remind me.
I move into this apartment → I'm tired, but some newspaper salesman tries to convince me for almost two hours to subscribe → I somehow manage to get him to leave, but a different newspaper salesman arrives five minutes later
→ He tries to convince me for another hour → I'm totally worn out, when an Asahi guy rings the bell next. I'm so exhausted that I accept immediately and subscribe
→ I tell myself it was worth it because now I can say "Sorry, but I'm already subscribed to another newspaper..."
→ Three months later, I realize it doesn't make a difference. Newspaper salesmen never give up.
Anyways, that's why I'm subscribed to Asahi till March next year!!
This is how you get rid of newspaper salesmen.
"Nevermind that, and listen to what I'm about to tell you. It doesn't have anything to do with what you just said though.
I went to Yoshinoya the other day. You know Yoshinoya, right?"
(and continue to tell him the whole copypasta)
I used to get visits from newspaper salesmen too, but here's what I told them:
"What? You're selling newspaper? At this time and age? You're so behind the times, man.
Have you heard of the Internet? You can read news for free on it.
You should try it out sometime. It'll make you feel stupid for still trying to sell newspapers."
And none of them ever came back.
They must have been so mad that they got rekt by someone younger than themw
"What? You're selling newspaper? At this time and age? You're so behind the times, man.
Have you heard of the radio?" etc.
What if he turns out to be a nutjob and says something crazy like "By the way, I can use the spell Kaboom from Dragon Quest in real life..."?w
>>869
Nope, I could never do that. The most frightening/depressing/spine-chilling one out of the three salesmen
was the second one who tried to convince me for an hour.
He didn't give up no matter what I said, so I just kept repeating
"Sorry, but I really don't need it.", "No, I do get that reading newspapers is important...",
but he just kept repeating "You should subscribe then!!". Nothing I said helped.
At the end, he said "Let's make it only three months, okay!?" and started filling out the subscription form for me.
When I said "No, I really can't. I'm sorry, but please leave. I don't have time for this!",
he suddenly stopped smiling and said
"Oh, is that right. Then throw this away for me, will you?".
Then he crumpled up the unfinished subscription form, shoved it into my hands with this cold look in his eyes before he shut the door in my face and left.
It was scary as fuck.
Radio doesn't have a TV listings section though.
Since the kitchen is usually close to the entrance, it'll just look like you were in the middle of cooking.
If it had been me, I'd have given that guy's boss a call.
Yeah, I've seen my share of door-to-door salesmen who act like that.
As soon as they realize that you're serious about not buying anything, their attitude changes like night and day.
Some of them slam your door shut and leave while making as much noise as possible.
If it had been me, I'd have given that guy's boss a call.
I'd have told him "One of your men broke my door. I want it fixed."
Though, writing about it in the Internet is easy. Now that I'm sitting in my comfortable chair, I can think of all kinds of ways to deal with them,
but I couldn't do shit when it actually mattered. I don't have the balls to put it into practice.
That's because you're still a kid.
In fact, I was like that too when I was young.
But as you get older, you gain more and more courage to speak your mind.
It probably varies from person to person, but for me, it was when I reached 30.
You see, middle-aged guys have their privileges too.
One of them being authority.
Even if a youngster is saying the truth, he'll never come off as convincing as an older guy lying through his teeth.
Just don't open the door.
"Hello?" "Hello, I'm from ○○ newspaper." "Not interested."
And that's it.
they're just some geezers who won't shut up, aren't they?
"Please hear me out first."
"Want me to call the police? Which newspaper sent you? Mainichi? Yomiuri?"
It's usually Yomiuri.
Guess Kansai thinks OP is annoying after all.
If you're not having any friends over, all you have to do is pretend you're not at home.
Yeah, well, perhaps I didn't explain myself correctly.
I don't know if it's authority, but when you're older, you understand the difference between being the seller and the buyer better,
and you realize that as the buyer, you can pretty much say anything you want...
That's what I meant to say.
I prefer a mouth actually.
But yeah, still no e-mail from her. I've been worried sick since I got up.
To make matters worse, I fell asleep too early yesterday and now I'm going to have a hard time staying awake during late shift tonight. I should try to get some sleep.
Guess I'll have to record today's Gundam episode.
Sleep well, Molester.
I think you could use some beauty sleep.
I'm heading out for a bit.
They all think your e-mails are annoyingww
Shows how clueless you are because I look like an angel when I'm sleeping.
There's a 50% chance that I fall asleep on my bus home from university, and a pretty good chance that I'm still asleep when the bus pulls up to my station.
So far, I got waken up by a woman more than ten times.
In b4 "So what?".
So what?
"Just bought some super cheap pork at SATY.
Guess I'm having fried pork with ginger the next few daysw",
you wouldn't know what to reply either, would you?
If you got this e-mail, OP, would you know what to reply?
Kansai: "So what?"
"Ehh, I wanna have some too! Say, can I come to your place, Molester?
I love me some of your yummy pork!! <3"
"Let's have a hot pot together if you have too much porkw"
Ideal reply #2:
"So what?w You just needed an excuse to e-mail me, didn't you? Didn't you?w"
Reality:
You have no new e-mails.
ttp://hp.vector.co.jp/authors/VA022293/
Can someone please tell me how to beat the boss in the labyrinth?
Why would Kansai who lives with her family care about a sale?w
Guess I'm having fried pork with ginger the next few daysw"
( ´Д｀) What a creep.
"Sorry, lil bro."
"Ah, hold on!"
"What?"
"It's really dangerous to ride a bike in the rain, so be careful on your way home."
"............................................."
"Huh? Hello? Are you there?"
"Yeah, I'm here."
"Ah, okay. Well, just be careful on your way home."
"...thanks."
"See you."
"Yeah."
↑
OP didn't contact her for two days after this.
"Just bought some super cheap pork at SATY.
Guess I'm having fried pork with ginger the next few daysw"
↑
And then he suddenly sends this?
(#´ﾟДﾟ`) What was he thinking!!?
Lol. I'd forgotten about that.
Remember the phone call from Kansai a few days ago?
It was the day after Molester left her a voicemail message.
Remember how she seemed really curious about whether Miss Undie had told him something?
At first, I too thought she simply didn't want OP to know what she had gone through that day...
But what if Kansai was on the verge of falling in love with Molester and
had told Miss Undie about it...?
What if that was what she was afraid Miss Undie had told him about?
For some reason, I'm convinced that this was the real reason.
OP's creepy pork e-mail might have made her change her mind about him though.
because she's at my place right now.
----Kansai----
But I guess you can't really expect her to reply to an e-mail about porkw
Molester seems to be the type of guy who can't get anything done when he plans ahead.
The impulsive type who gets stuck easily.
Hey.
If he stopped planning ahead, wouldn't this thread become obsolete?w
Thanks, brain.
━━━━
And no, Molester, there was no seicross scene.
That she meant exactly what she said.
>>922
Too bad, today was Lunamaria's turn.
>>923
What did you say!?
The Black Tri-Stars were referenced, Athrun used kick attacks in what looked like Char's Zaku, there was an entering-the-atmosphere scene, the whole story is a reference to Delaz' Fleet,
but again, no seicross scene this week.
>>925
Oh, alright. I was afraid I'd missed a seicross scene because I tuned in a few minutes late.
It's gonna make it so hard to e-mail her again if she doesn't reply...
I feel like "Let's hang out if you're free, sis."
would have been better.
Seriously???
"We want to go shopping with you tomorrow.".
Tomorrow? Are they coming to your place tomorrow?
When are they coming?
I'm cursorily cleaning up my room three times faster than normal.
I hate you so much... ･ﾟ･(つД`)･ﾟ･
I have to agree this time.
Just when I'd finished reading this and was hungry for more true love stories,
this happens. Perfect timing.
Eh, wait a second.
Are they on their way to your place right now!?
I got an e-mail → "Don't you have to work today?" → I replied almost immediately → "My shift starts at 10 pm tonight" →
She called me to say
"We're on our way home and thought we'd drop by." → I started cleaning up three times faster than normal
Hurry up and take down all your posters!!
Make sure to remove your anime posters.
You start the next thread.
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
Thanks in advance.
Shouldn't you clean up thoroughly instead of cursorily?
I'm sorry to bother you when you're busy,
but you'll have to start the next thread.
Nah, make a new one.
Is your desktop clean?
In case you lost count, the next thread is the 14th one.
Get in here!
It sounded like they just wanted to talk a little.
- Remove the posters
- Switch to a normal PC wallpaper
- Get rid of anything that suggests you're a VIPPER
- Molester's shift starts at 10pm tonight
- The three of you will go shopping tomorrow
Did I miss anything?
Crabs.
Hide all anime DVDs and stuff if you have any.
- I rolled my posters up into beam sabers super carefully and hid them in my closet
- My wallpaper is always normal because my parents check up on me from time to time
- That's impossible.
>>971
It's not decided that we'll go shopping tomorrow yet.
For starters, you could treat them to fried pork with ginger.
Alright! What do I do? Where do I go?
What about underwear??? Should I put on my lucky underwear?
Looks like you still haven't learned your lesson from last time when Kansai wanted to go up to your room and you didn't let her.
If you clean up your room and they don't come up to your room, it's alright.
But if you don't clean up and they come up, you're in deep shit.
See? You don't have a choice but to clean up.
Get rid of the smell of reptiles and sperm.
Make sure to ventilate too.
Don't forget the condom!!
Ahh, I meant to write "a threesome with Kansai and Miss Understanding".
Molester has to play two roles, huh?
Wanna do it?
〒 ! + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
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＊ + / / Yeeeeeehaaaaaawwww!
∧＿∧ / /
（´∀｀ / / + 。 + 。 ＊ 。
,- ｆ
/ ｭﾍ | ＊ + 。 + 。 + This thread has reached 1000 posts.
〈＿｝ ） | The next thread too will have... VIP QUALITY!!
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./ ,ﾍ |
bang ||| j / | | |||
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