Everyone in VIP, no, in 2ch, please hear me out.
The other day, I was totally mistaken for a molester.
And I don't mean it as a joke, I was actually mistaken for one in the blink of an eye.
It all started with this...
Previous thread:
I got totally mistaken for a molester part 9
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100428147/
Templates omitted.
http://tikanotoko.nobody.jp/index.html
↑ Go here for a summary of the threads.
Registrations will start at 19:00, but someone needs to go and register VIP as a kingdom first.
Anyways, everyone just get in here.
"Let's play conquest if you're free!"
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100514039/
Thx.
Crabs to you.
Let me post "Good job!" here too.
You've done an extraordinarily good job!
Crabs.
FLAAAAASH
ノし八丿 丿ノへ 丿ノノ ）ﾉノし八丿 ＿＿ 八丿＿＿
――＝ニ二ヘ ＼＿, ,＿／＿＿ ￣＿＿―――丶
＿＿＿＿__,＼_ノ〃 ぐ＼／ ､＿￣＿＿＿＿,,,
／￣γ０｡ヽ￣＼ミミ ／￣γ〇oヽ￣ ＼"
丶 ﾟ ノ ミ ミミミ ヽ ゜ ノ "
″ヽ ＿ ＿_ノ ミ ミミ ヽ ＿ ＿＿ノ"
￣彡 ミミ ￣ 彡
彡彡彡 彡 彡 ミミ
Sorry, but 1000 is mine!
1002 Name:1001[] Date:Over 1000 Thread
1001
I lol'd at the 1002 posts .
Did everyone get tired of this thread? Are they all preoccupied with something else?
I lol'dwww
Thanks again.
Continued:
"Miss Yamaoka even bought coats, remember? She said she got into trouble with her parents because she spent too much money!"
"She bought two coats, didn't she? I remember thinking to myself that she's spending way too muchw"
"Loli said she spent so much she doesn't have any money left for food!"
"Huh? Does Miss Jugs live on her own?"
"Didn't I tell you? It's usually girls living on their own that come to work at our restaurant because the pay is so good."
"Oh, I see."
I didn't know.
"After all the running around on Saturday, we were so tired at work the next dayw"
"You had to work? I had switched shifts with someone else so I could rest on the next day. You should have too."
"Well, we somehow managed because it was an evening shift. But Kansai seemed especially exhausted."
Crab sticks.
Why? Was she on her period?
When I have a conversation with a woman, it usually ends after one e-mail. Whoawwwwwwwwww
Plus, she hung out with me all night... Why'd she do that if she knew she had to work on the next day...
"Yeah. And she had an early morning shift too."
"Huh!? Eh? How early?"
"She had to help prepare the store for business, so it must have been around 9 am."
Are you for real?
I couldn't believe it. I was in shock. But I couldn't tell Miss Understanding. Wasn't her business anyway.
"Wow, tough luck."
"And she broke a plate and got told off by the manager. She seemed frustrated since she hadn't broken any plates this month."
Don't kill yourself.
>28
So exciting!
She's so fucking cute!!!!! Whoawwwww
Actually, I wanted to talk to her about self-defense products too,
but it didn't feel right to bring up such a serious topic after a fun chat,
so I ended the call without mentioning it.
Then, after giving it a lot of thought, and eating the rest of the beef pot, I posted about the call here.
Call Kansai!
Oh wait, maybe she's sleeping now.
YOUR STORY IS SO FAKEーーーーーーーーーー!!!!!!!!!!!!
YOU PULLED IT OUT OF YOUR ASSーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーー!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But meh, I'll read it anyway......
"Slow down, Kansai. You're gonna work yourself to death."
Send her this.
Now that you know about her sacrifice, there's only one thing you can do now. Run to Kansai's place.
"Why didn't you tell me anything?"
"I was just worried about you, Molester..."
"You idiot."
We held each other tight.
Before we noticed, we were humming a jazz tune.
And so on.
Yeah, right?
I've been thinking and thinking, yet I'm still unsure what to do...
Even your average best friend or girlfriend wouldn't waste a good night's sleep on some loser who's dumb enough to lose his house keys.
And tell her something like
"Hehehe. I heard you broke a plate! [Insert more stuff here] But thank you, Kansai."
Call her if you're a human being!
Why don't you just pick a route after you've become friends with them?
Even Miss Undie. It's not like she said she hates you or something.
Do all your posts end that way?
And what happened between you and Lady!?
"Is it true that you had to work right after that? And yet you stayed with me all night?
Tell me. Why did you do that?"
I wouldn't try to hide it from her though.
If it'd been me, I'm sure I'd have directly called Kansai right after talking to Miss Undie.
should be the last sentence.
But if you're extra nice to her, I'm sure she'll notice on her own.
Show your appreciation with gestures instead of words.
I'll post about it when Molester isn't around.
Or else, he won't have a reason to thank her on the phone anymore.
But I also think I shouldn't tell her that I heard about it from Miss Understanding.
She must have felt very bad to go that far to make up for it... Isn't it better to act like I don't know about it?
Really?
You think so?
Maybe, you're right.
I'm not sure.
Kansai = Mitsuki
Ah, would it make OP sound like he only called because he heard about it?
to forcefully advance the stagnating story.
Well, that's where our opinions differ and that's okay. To each his own.
I'm just saying I wouldn't be wise and farsighted enough to hear about something like that and do nothing.
You should tell her.
What if Miss Undie tells Kansai tomorrow that you talked about it on the phone?
You know you're an asshole if you can't bother to thank a girl for keeping you company all night even after finding out she had to go to work right after that.
Thank Kansai briefly.
I say briefly because if you overdo it, Kansai might end up feeling bad again...
Like "You have to tell me when you're having a tough time... I'll gladly lend you an ear."
or "Tell me when you need someone to talk to." etc....
Alright then! Express your opinions!!
"Thanks for keeping me company till the morning even though you had to work after that."
All you have to do is tell her this on the phone. It's that simple.
...but I guess Molester is Molester because it's not that simple for himwww
Kansai: "Huh? What are you talking about?"
Molester: "Isn't that why you dropped it yesterday?"
Kansai: "Ahh, hahaha, you're so funny, Molester (lol)"
I'll be looking forward to it. Man, today gets better and better.
Sorry I made you keep me company until the morning. And thanks."
should be enough.
Brb watching Beat Takeshi's TV Tackle.
Wouldn't this do too?
That's creepy.
>>75
Call her now. Now that you know the truth, it's time to show her you're a good guy.
Don't get all careful now even though you're usually so careless.
You didn't have anyone to begin with. Why get scared of losing her now?
Even if you should lose her, you still have the Loli Jugs route waiting for you!!
Miss Undie will probably tell Kansai about your call anyway.
But don't mention the broken plate.
Just thank her for keeping you company all night.
Molester: "Are you free right now?"
Kansai: "What is it?"
Molester: "Wanna grab a bite to eat? I'm starving."
Then, once you're alone in a restaurant,
tell her this:
Molester: "Thanks for keeping me company the other day."
"But please don't do something like that again."
Follow this pattern.
I'm sure Kansai's going to hear about it from Miss Undie anyway.
Show her that you're a man! (And I don't mean show her your penis.)
Then, during the meal, tell her
"I heard you had to work an early morning shift the next day. I really owe you one."
[Insert more stuff here]
"But don't blame me for the plate you broke. That one's on you. *grin*"
With this, even OP will get to be like KimuTaku.
I'll try harder next time. (´;ω;`)
VIP is loading so slow today...
Something nice to say to Kansai.........
"Btw, I bought a T-shirt that goes well with the clothes you picked out for me."
"Good for you."
"But then I realized I have something way better to wrap myself in than a simple piece of cloth."
"Huh. What's that?"
"I'm talking about your kindness... Baby!!"
"So cool!!"
OTL
That's just how guys get when they try to score with a woman.
Koshiki was too direct and creepy about it, is all.
A robe of kindness, eh? Sorry to disappoint you, but two shiny balls and a stick are enough to tear it apart.
Are you saying Molester isn't direct or creepy?
>>95
Act according to your manly man philosophy.
What do you want to tell her when you think about how she kept you company all night?
Create a new save game every time you have to make a choice and you should be fine.
Kansai, I'm in love with you. → Kansai!! Please go out with me!! I can't take it anymore!! → I love you, Kansai!!
Stuff like this.
Bawww... I thought we had something going... I believed you, Kansai...
I hate you now, Kansai!!!
And it ends with:
Yuuka!! Yuuka-chan!!
Obviously.
"Any girl would do for you, huh......" Game over!!
She might actually react like that. Scary.
Miss Understanding wasn't interested in OP, so he switched to Kansai, but she'll obviously turn him down too.
Who's gonna be next?
I heard about it from Miss Undie.
I wanted to say thank you."
All you gotta do is send this one e-mail. It's so easy.
So everyone thinks I should call her?
Yeah. (´･ω･`)
"Eh? No, it's alright."
"Weren't you tired the next day?"
"Not really. I'd taken the day off."
--You idiot...
Before I noticed, I'd pulled her into my arms.
"H-Hey!"
"There's no need to try so hard."
"Eh..."
"Don't try so hard for someone like me."
"B-But..."
"...you're gonna... make me fall for you."
Do you have an attention seeking disorder or something?
It's boring because OP keeps dragging something out that should have only taken a few minutes.
>Molester
I hope it was worth spending this much time on.
Don't tell her you heard about it from Miss Understanding though.
"Sorry for making you keep me company all night even though you had to work the next day!
I'll treat you to domestic beef next time!"
Something along these lines should be good enough.
Good luck. (´･д･`)p
I wouldn't mention the broken plate.
Boasting about how you know everything about it is just creepy.
Try to calm down a little! Send her an e-mail first like you always do!
You're too excited for your own good right now, Molester. Stand firm like a mountain!
Let her get some rest, you egocentric prick.
"Err... Hello, it's me, Molester.
Thank you very much for going out of your way to keep me company all night.
Please try not to overexert yourself at work."
Why so formal...? OTL
AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!
WHY DO ANSWERING MACHINES NOT HAVE AN OPTION TO DELETE YOUR MESSAGE AND RECORD A NEW ONE!!?
I HEARD NOWADAYS EVEN PURIKURA BOOTHS HAVE A RETAKE OPTION!!!
Let's just wait for him to come back for now.
You're so fucking useless.
HE'S GONE BERSERKｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰｰ
WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!!?
but as soon as he does, they all go "What are you doing!?".
Well, I don't think it's that bad.
Just tell her you switched to formal speech because you're not used to leaving messages on answering machines.
But "Please try not to overexert yourself at work." makes it seem like you know about the broken plate which is kinda creepy.
Molester: "Hello, thanks for keeping me company all night."
Kansai: "....clack. Ah, hello, yeah, no, thanks. Eh? No, no, don't mention it."
(Her voice starts to sound somewhat muffled towards the end.)
Kansai: "No, no, yeah, everything's okay at work, yeah, I'll call you again... Hey, stop it... Mmmh..." clack.
PERVERTED BERSERKER THOMAS
from now on!
"Hello, either my cell phone is out of range or the battery is dead. Please leave a message after the beep..."
in formal speech. Wouldn't you answer in formal speech too?
He's out of control againw
Beep.
"Err... Hi, it's me, Molester.
Thank you very much for going out of your way to keep me company all night.
Please try not to overexert yourself at work."
Beep.
"Err... It's me again, Molester.
Let me treat you to lunch some time.
It's to thank you for last time. Good night."
It can still be fixed.
Well, if you want a serious reply, it's just a message on her answering machine. It won't change anythingw
I wouldn't.
>1
Just hope Kansai replies something like "Why is your message so formal!? (lol)".
40 DAYS LEFT UNTIL CHRISTMAS ('A`)
It's okay to hang up when you get the answering machine. She'd have seen a missed call and known that you called.
Then she'd have called you back later and you could have talked to her directly.
You're not really single, are you?
annoying.
Not me.
Sorry, I did. (´･д･`)
You got thirty minutes then. Try to come up with interesting things to talk about till then.
It's going to take some time until Kansai replies. We need you to fill the time until then.
Guess I'll watch the SAKUSAKU episodes I recorded to kill time...
I won't be back until she calls back, so whoever wanted to report about himself, go ahead.
So suddenly...
What do I talk about?
About Lady.
Also, I asked her if she's a VIPPER, but she said no.
Apparently, she's usually over in the news board for women... Guess she's usually just lurking?
She said she's a D cup.
Sorry, but I'm not allowed to post anything about her without asking her permission first...
And she gave you permission to post about her cup size?wwww
Post pics of her face and boobs then, goddammit.
Apparently, when VIP went down yesterday and we started the shelter over in News Flash, she happened to be there too.
That's how she found Molester's thread and read the old threads...
Whoawwwww OKwwwww Good luck with your 2channer girlfriendww
Then she knows you were lying when you said you only visit mobile-only websitesw
When I asked her if I could post pics of her, she told me with a serious face that she'll break my cell phone in half if I do... shake shake
>1
Stop watching SAKUSAKU and think about what to talk to her on the phone about...
My girlfriend doesn't even allow me to browse 2ch... (´･д･`)
I hope you'll become happy with her.
When I apologized to her on the phone for lying to her, she was ready to blow her top;
Oh, okay, I guess there's no use asking for pics then...
Sounds like she knows pretty much everything about you by now.
In other words, you can post pics of her if you sacrifice your cell phone for it.
...I'm just joking though. Don't do it.
Thank you...
>169
By the way, she basically forced me to promise her to send an e-mail whenever I want to post something about her. (´;ω;`)
Just the simple fact that they have a PC makes them a lot tougher to handle...
To check what you're going to post about her, huh.... You're like an editor getting chewed out by his editor-in-chief. I get a boner when I think about it like that.
Wait, does that mean she's watching this thread right now?
Please suck my dick!!
Someone tell me what happened since the servers went down yesterday.
...
No, I don't wanna! つ´Д`)つ〃bang bang
>175
She said she's going to check the archive later... shake shake
Who cares about that? Tell us what happened to you first!!
Let me sum up the events that transpired since yesterday night.
Molester Man, after a lot of hesitating and reading/ignoring our opinions, jumped the gun and called Miss Undie.
Then he left 2 messages on Kansai's answering machine and is now waiting for a reply.
Coffee Lounge, on the other hand, found out that the lady he met offline, Lady, is a 2channer. As if that wasn't enough, she knows about this thread too.
He somehow managed to calm her down, and is now posting about what happened, but she checks every single one of his posts. He's the only winner in this thread so far.
And me? I'm sitting here not flying into space like I wish I was.
Can I post it here?
I only left one message!!
This thread was getting stale anyway.
So yeah, go on.
Oh, I thought you'd already left a second message.
But damn, you replied quicklyw
We still have time until something new happens in our problem child's story.
So yeah, go on.
Ohh! I was getting bored because you'd stopped coming. Please go ahead.
Thanks.
Ohh, so much happened.
I lol'd at Coffee Lounge.
And GJw
I'm going to post it then.
ba-dump ba-dump
ba-dump ba-dump
If you've ever seen it, you'll know that it's not really made for two people to ride on.
Anyhow, I made Fujoshi buy a cheap full-face helmet, sit her behind me and headed straight to Yokohama,
but it was quickly getting dark out, and cold too.
Fujoshi must have been freezing her butt off, but she seemed to be thoroughly enjoying the first bike ride in her life.
I, on the other hand, wasn't having as much fun as my whole body was slowly turning into a block of ice.
Yep, you guessed it right. I'd left home lightly dressed because I thought I'd go home as soon as I was finished stalking Molester.
To be honest, at this point, if I could have chosen between going home right away and having seicross with Fujoshi, I'd have picked the former... orz
(Whoaw It's cold as fuckwww Will I make it to Yokohama alive!?)
(Chances are I won't be able to get her to have seicross with me anyway, so maybe I should just come up with some excuse to drop her off and ride home...)
(But if I do get lucky and I hit it off with her... Oh babyw)
In the end, I decided to just ride a little faster.
Fujoshi: Uhh... S-S-So cold...
Me: I told you it'd get cold! But there you go, Yokohama beach. Wanna go for a swim?
Fujoshi: I-I-I'll pass. Y-Y-You go for a swim... Uhh... (She seemed to be freezing)
Me: I doubt I'd survive itw
Fujoshi: Y-Y-Yeah... shake shake...
There's not much you can do on a beach on a cold winter's night.
All we did was sit there drinking canned coffee and having a chat.
Actually, it was just me listening to Fujoshi talk on and on...
Your timing sucks, as alwaysw
but her boyfriend didn't come. Instead, he dumped her in an e-mail.
In order to distract herself from getting dumped all of a sudden, she went shopping until she ran into me.
And God knows why, but she liked me and felt like spending more time with me.
Pretty much all she talked about was stuff that doesn't interest me like anime and otaku events.
But I noticed how she got quiet and lost her usual energy whenever the topic changed to her boyfriend.
It was understandable since they'd apparently been a lovey-dovey couple until only yesterday.
So I asked her out of curiosity without thinking:
Me: Why did he dump you? All of a sudden too.
Fujoshi: .........
Fujoshi: I don't know...
Fujoshi: I immediately called to ask him why, but... he didn't answer the phone...
As soon as she'd finished the sentence, she looked down and stopped talking.
(Oh crap! Did I just step on a landmine!? Am I even more tactless than Molester!?)
(Please don't break out in tears now... I wouldn't know how to deal with it...)
I didn't know what to do and got all flustered,
but then placed one of my hands on Fujoshi's head and said
Me: I'm sorry about what happened to you, but cheer up...
Fujoshi: ....yeah, sorry...
Then she suddenly hugged me. (Whoaw I won't say no thatwww)
I too put my arms around her back and hugged her back.
Unable to do anything else, we stayed like that for a while.
(I have to say something... Say something... Umm... umm...)
(...('A`) MMM～MMM～MMHMMHMMM～MMM～MMM～MMHMMM (ﾟ∀ﾟ) RUB IT!!)
No, no, what am I going RUB IT!! for at a time like this...
Frankly, my mind had gone blank... orz
That's when Fujoshi suddenly raised her face and said
Fujoshi: Sorry... I'm alright now...
Whoaw She looks so cute when she's cryingwww
I couldn't help myself and kissed her right then and there...
I couldn't help myself and kissed her right then and there...
I couldn't help myself and kissed her right then and there...
I couldn't help myself and kissed her right then and there...
I couldn't help myself and kissed her right then and there...
But Fujoshi didn't pull away.
I'm sure the kiss only lasted an instant, but it felt like an eternity to me.
If I'd been a popular guy, I bet I could have had seicross with her right then,
but I don't have any skills in that department.
Plus, I was starting to feel cold again, so I said
Me: Let's head back.
Fujoshi: Okay... But let's stop by somewhere on the way and warm ourselves up first.
Fujoshi: We'll freeze to death if we ride all the way back without stopping now.
Me: You're right. Shall we stop by at a family restaurant or something?
Fujoshi: Yeah!
And so we were back on the road again.
We passed several family restaurants on the way, but she kept saying
Fujoshi: Let's go a little further!
for some reason...
After quite a while, Fujoshi finally pointed at a building.
It was, no matter how you looked at it,
A LOVE HOTEL
(Whoaww Is she serious?wwww)
I lol'd.
I was eternally grateful for Molester when it happened.
If I'd had Molester's e-mail address, I would have sent him a thank-you e-mail.
But I seriously panicked since it was my first time in a love hotel, not to mention that it took me by surprise since I'd already given up on seicross today.
She said I was acting pretty suspiciously as I kept looking around nervously in the love hotel.
As soon as we'd entered our room, she wouldn't stop laughing... orz
Fujoshi must have realized that I'm inexperienced because she took the lead when we did it the first time.
It must have helped as I wasn't nervous at all anymore.
And then...
I got to do it with her three more times after that. m(_ _)m
＿＿＿＿＿ peｰpepo peｰpepo pepepopopeｰ♪
|Playground|
￣￣￣￣￣ ('A`)
ﾍ⑩ ﾉ( ﾉ )
('ω` ) < ）～
U U U U
MISSON CLEAR!!
>three more times after that
>three more times after that
('A`)
Molester<<<<<<<<<<<<<Pork Cutlet
No complaints from my side.
But man, I wish something like that would happen to me.
I especially liked the build-up to the kiss!
Sharp observation, my friendw
I'll continue dumping then.
Fujoshi: Ah! It's time for Dr. Koto's Clinic!!
Me: Huh!?
Fujoshi: Gotta turn the TV on!!
Me: What the hell... (´･ω･`)
Fujoshi: This is why I suggested a love hotel!!
Me: What's that supposed to mean?ww Hey, you're not even listening!!
Fujoshi: Isn't it obvious? I wouldn't have made it back home in time and you can't watch TV in a family restaurant. Going to a love hotel was the only option.
Me: Okay, okay, I get itw
That meant we had to extend the time of our stay, but I didn't really mind and decided to watch Dr. Koto's Clinic with her.
But then I remembered I didn't find it interesting, and went on VIP to check how Molester Man's doing.
While replying to the posts adressed to me, I asked her
Me: Are you going to watch all of it?
Fujoshi: Of course.
Me: Then we'll have to extend the time, you know?
Fujoshi: That's okay, I'll pay.
Me: What are you, rich?
Fujoshi: Yes, in fact, I am rich.
Me: Σ（´Д｀！？
Fujoshi: (goes back to watching TV)
Me: I'll pay half of it then.
Fujoshi: Okay, whatever, just shush now!
Me: (´･ω･`) SAD
Wonder if my wife will allow it...
Fuck you!!
Hope you get gonorrhea, syphillis and AIDS all at once!
What happened after that?
Since it'd gotten late, I decided to drop her off near her home.
Me: Where do you live?
Fujoshi: ○○○○○ < A certain upper-class residential area
Me: Huh!? Seriously now!?
Fujoshi: I told you, didn't I? I'm richw
Me: Ugh, I can't stand it when people call themselves rich...
Fujoshi: Hehehe～
I rode us all the way back and dropped her off someplace near her home (or so she claimed).
Unprotected sex → Pregnancy → Marriage ('A`)人(･∀･)
is how the story goes.
You lucky dick!
Me: Ah, right.
Fujoshi: (while adding my e-mail) Are you free tomorrow?
Me: Eh?
Fujoshi: Tomorrow evening would be perfect.
Me: Huh!? ...yeah, I don't have anything planned...
Fujoshi: I'll treat you to something as a thanks for hanging out with me today.
Me: No, no, you don't have to. I mean I enjoyed myself too.
And she's rich too!
。 ◇◎｡ｏ.:O☆οo.
。:゜ ◎::O☆∧_∧☆｡∂:o゜
／。○。 ∂（´∀｀）O◇。☆
／ ◎|￣￣∪￣∪￣￣￣|:◎:
／ ☆｡|. Congrats!!! .|☆
▼ 。○..ｉｏ.｡◇.☆＿＿＿＿| 。.:
∠▲―――――☆ :∂ｉo☆ ゜◎∂:.
＿|￣|○～
Me: Like what?ww But well, sure...
Fujoshi: I'll show you my favorite cosplay costume!
Me: Ah, okay, I'll be looking forward it.
Fujoshi: Okay, how about a goodbye kiss?
Me: (Whoaw She's so weirdw) S-Sure...
～～～Please wait a moment～～～
Fujoshi: Okay, I'll e-mail you!
Me: Sure, see you tomorrow.
Fujoshi: Yeah! Get home safe! Bye-bye!
Whew... I'd enjoyed myself quite a lot, but in return, it'd left me totally spent...
Back at home, I reported back in Molester's thread while exchanging e-mails with Fujoshi.
She asked me to pick the costume I wanted to seew
It was a difficult question for someone like me who knows absolutely nothing about anime.
How am I supposed to pick one if I don't know any of the characters... orz
In the end, I randomly picked the one called "MariMite".
Fujoshi said she'd bring her "MariMite" costume plus her own favorite on the next day.
I was going to stay awake and keep continuing my report until Molester came back,
but sleepiness hit me like a brick wall, so I said good night to the VIPPERs and went to bed.
I think it was almost 5 am.
｜＼ Christmas!
∴∴∴
(´･ω･`)
(;;つ□O;
L,,,,[：],,｣
(＿_)＿)
。:゜ ◎::O☆∧_∧☆｡∂:o゜
／。○。 ∂('A`)O◇。☆
／ ◎|￣￣∪￣∪￣￣￣|:◎:
／ ☆｡|. Congrats!!! .|☆
▼ 。○..ｉｏ.｡◇.☆＿＿＿＿| 。.:
∠▲―――――☆ :∂ｉo☆ ゜◎∂:.
either histrionic personality disorder or borderline personality disorder or dissociative disorder.
He doesn't remember what he's done.
I knew directly it was from Fujoshi since I don't have any friends to exchange e-mails with.
"I hope I didn't wake you up.
Sorry for basically forcing you to hang out with me yesterday...
And sorry you had to go home so late too.
As a thanks, I'll treat you to lots of good food today, so you better come on an empty stomach! (lol)
Let's do lots of fun things after that! (<3)
Ah, there's no need to bring your wallet with you today!!
See ya later then. (kiss)"
I'm not used to receiving extremely upbeat e-mails first thing in the morning...
When she says "fun things"... she means seicross, right...? Whoaw
She even said "lots of fun things"www
After I'd let my imagination run wild for a while, a surge of skepticism hit me.
She's too perfect. This doesn't seem to be a dream, but where's the catch?
One thing's for sure. Fujoshi must have a few screws loose in her head...
Or is it some kind of a trap?
What if she's a huge trap set up by VIPPERs?
Nah, they wouldn't do that.
Σ（´Д｀Is it the Loungers!?
Nah, this is way too elaborate for a trap made by 2channers.
In that case... is it a badger game...? (((( ；ﾟДﾟ))) shake shake
But when I said hello in Molester's thread like I always do,
it seemed like I'd showed up at a bad time, so I decided to come back later.
It was understandable. After all, the thread was made for Molester, not for me.
It was only natural that they'd get annoyed with me... orz
Besides, all I ever post about is stuff that's happened to me, stuff you'd normally write in your blog.
The "THIS ISN'T YOUR BLOG" AA popped up in my head for a secondw
But on the other hand, there seemed to be people who were looking forward to my posts too.
In the end, I decided to type it all out in Notepad and give it another try this evening.
I opened Notepad, and started writing down everything that happened to me yesterday.
When I got to the part where we went into a love hotel, I couldn't take it anymore and squeezed one off.
Whew... Seicross is such a nice thing...
I was going to decide what to do with Fujoshi... orz
Do I see her today, or do I stop seeing her...?
I was deep in thoughts, unable to make up my mind, when my cell phone rang.
Almost gave me a heart attack. (;´Д｀)
Whoa! Oh shit! I still haven't made up my mind!
Still, I answered the call right away.
Fujoshi: Ah, sorry, did I wake you up?
Me: Ahh... Eh, well, no, I'd just gotten up and I was reading your e-mail.
Fujoshi: You were sleeping till late afternoon!?
Me: Yeah. Sorry, sorry.
Fujoshi: You were taking so long to reply that I got tired of waiting and called you.
Me: Ahh, my bad. Are you outside right now?
Fujoshi: Yeah, I'm on my way back from shopping!
Me: Did you buy cosplay stuff again?w
Fujoshi: I did! Wow! How did you know!?
Me: Σ（´Д｀
(I didn't. It was supposed to be a joke... orz)
Me: I see. Be careful out there.
Fujoshi: I will! You better come flying to me if something should happen to me!!
Me: Yeah, I'll come "flying" to you by foot.
Fujoshi: What's that supposed to mean!? Ah! Right! How do we do it today?
Fujoshi: I mean, when and where are we meeting up?
Me: Ah, right...
Fujoshi: How about 6 pm? Right where we said bye-bye yesterday!
Me: Ah, sure, sounds good.
Fujoshi: Are you coming on your bike again?
Me: You like my bike, don't you?
Fujoshi: No, it's too cold on your bike!! Don't you have a car?
Me: Nope. Unlike you, I'm not richw
Fujoshi: Hmm, I've got a lot to carry with me though...
Me: Ahh, I see. Then I'll borrow my parents' car today.
Fujoshi: Then it's decided!!
Me: Great. Ah... But it might take a bit longer because I have to go to my parents place first to borrow their car.
Fujoshi: Okay! Call me when you're there!
Me: Okay.
Fujoshi: See ya later then! Bye-bye!
Me: Okay, bye-bye.
Post her list of cosplays pls.
And post pictures of her wearing them!!
It feels like melting.
I just can't turn her down if she asks like that.
But it's too late for regrets now!
I decided to get pumped for some serious seicross action.
Since I didn't have any time to lose, I quickly took a shower and headed to my parents' place to borrow their car.
Dad: It's rare for you to go out in a car. Did you get yourself a girlfriend? Try not to stain the seats too muchw
Dad was clearly enjoying teasing me, but he let me borrow his Toyota Crown anyway.
I somehow made it to our meeting place before 6 pm.
Fujoshi arrived on time too and we decided to get something to eat first.
Once in the car, Fujoshi gave me directions from the passenger's seat.
Not that it kept her from talking on and on, like always.
What's more, all she ever talked about was fujoshi stuff, her own field of expertise... orz
Fujoshi: There it is! There!
Me: Eh?
Fujoshi: Oh, look, there's a parking spot too!
Me: ...here!? A hotel!?
Fujoshi: Don't worry! Didn't I say it's my treat?
Me: Yeah, but it looks like it costs a fortune...
Fujoshi: Don't worry about the money!!
Me: ...okay...
This is my first time in a restaurant that does that for youw
As I was busy trying to pick my jaw off the floor, Fujoshi was smiling happily the whole time.
Once we'd finished our meals, she asked
Fujoshi: Want me to order more?
Me: Whew～ No, I'm as full as can bew
Me: Ah, are you sure it's okay!?
Fujoshi: Hm?
Me: You know, the money...
Fujoshi: Not again～!!
Me: Ah, okay, okay..
Fujoshi: Let's get going then. You go ahead, I'll be right with you.
Me: Eh? Ahh, yeah, okay.
I guess she thought I'd feel bad if I saw the check.
It feels fucking amazing. I've never done it though.
No, you can't stop now. Dump it to the end.
Fujoshi: Okay, let's go!!
Me: Eh!? Where to??
Fujoshi: A love hotel!! You pick the hotel.
Me: Ah, okay, but... don't you want to go watch the skyline at night?
Fujoshi: Hmm... Doesn't interest me...
Fujoshi: You don't want to go to a love hotel?
Me: Ah, fuck it. Let's go! Let's hit a love hotel!
Fujoshi: Yeah, let's!!
So we got in the car and looked for a love hotel.
It goes without saying that Fujoshi talked like a waterfall during the drive.
She told me everything about the costumes she's been working on lately.
Fujoshi: Ah! I like that one!!
Me: Alright.
Since it was my second time in a love hotel, I didn't look around nervously anymore.
I still got laughed at once we were in a room though. Only this time, it was because I acted too much like a regular love hotel visitor... orz
It was, of course, a cosplay of Sachiko-sama, right?
I wasn't allowed to look until she was finishedw
When she said she was finished and I peeked at her, she was wearing a green sailor uniform.
I suppose it was the "MariMite" cosplay she'd been speaking of.
It wasn't anything like the one someone posted in Molester's thread!! ヽ(`Д´)ﾉ
Anyways, we did it once with her in that costume.
She got really mad when I tried to undress her. (´･ω･`) SAD
I guess she wanted to do it at least once in full cosplay.
I didn't complain because it was extremely arousing to do it fully clothed. (;´Д｀) pant pant
When we did it a second time, I only took off the upper part of her costume.
The third time was in the bath, and she got changed into a different costume for the fourth time.
It was Chun-Li, one of her favorites.
Even I knew this onew
Fujoshi: How do I look?
Me: (･∀･) GOOD!!
After that, we were spent and satisfied, so we decided to leave the hotel.
During the drive to Fujoshi's place, she got suddenly quiet even though she'd been talking non-stop moments ago.
No, Molester should always be the main topic of this thread.
I'm just filler.
You son of a......
AHHHHーーーーー I WANNA HAVE SEICROSS TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Hope you don't get stabbed to death when you cheat on her.
She can pull off both a MariMite character and Chun-Li...? Then the MariMite character she cosplayed, was it the Rosa Foetida en bouton!?
I've only had older women lately...
Me: Hey! We're at your place!
Fujoshi: Mmmh～, Ah, sorry, was I sleeping?
Me: Like a babyw
Fujoshi: Sorry, sorry.
Me: Are you okay?
Fujoshi: Yeah! I'm going home then!
Me: Alright. Thanks for today.
She suddenly kissed me.
Fujoshi: Today was fun too! I'll e-mail you again! See ya!
Me: Okay, bye-bye.
7 times in 2 days!!
I wish I was young again...
It must be so hot to do it with a cosplayer.
Why aren't there any girls like that in my life!?
Though I guess if I met a girl like that, I'd just think she's a slut and stay away...
Keep posting!!
That is Molester QUALITY.
That's because you ARE a total scrub.
>>278 Molester Man, I really owe you one.
I don't give a damn about Pork Cutlet. You're the only one I'm interested in.
You go polish your phone until it gleams or until Kansai calls, whichever comes first.
I lol'd. My sides hurt.
Milk her until she's dry.
>>279
Lol.
GJ
>1
It's hilarious how everyone's picking on OP now.
This is a wonderful thread that gives hope, and encourages people like me.
I think I'll try going to a mixer this weekend.
I WANNA HAVE SEICROSS TOOーーーーーーーーーー
Molester Man = God
It was nice... until my wife found out. Now she wants to divorce me.
Molester, Pork Cutlet, never chase after two rabbits.
Are you going to go out with them seriously?
Otherwise, I'm just too pathetic compared to you because all I do is sit here and fap to Aida Yua while you're out there living the life.
(´･ω･`) ○ (´･ω･`) 。 Ｏ
○ 。
Let's fly SAD bubbles～♪ (´･ω･`) ○ 。
∧＿∧ 。 ｏ ○
(*´･ω･)ｙ━o (´･ω･`)
( つ□ﾉ
し' し' That is VIP QUALITY.
http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
I fucking lol'dww
Yeah... She asked me out and I said okay, so yeah, I'm going to go out with her seriously.
GJ
but I'm not sure if I should actually go out with Fujoshi or not.
If you think about it calmly, doesn't she strike you as really odd?
>>301
>>301
>>301
>>301
For starters, post Fujoshi's specs. Or have you already posted them before?
Hang in there...
In Pork Cutlet's case, I doubt Fujoshi would mind if he kept their relationship casual. But on the other hand, there's no guarantee that she won't dump him all of a sudden.
I live in the Kansai region. Where should I go if I want to get laid?
Where are Hokkaido people like me supposed to go to get laid?
Be careful when you're walking around at night.
Also, you might catch Fujoshi calling someone from time to time. Don't ask her who it is.
Well, there must have been a reason why she was dumped by her ex-boyfriend that suddenly.
Just saying.
I can see why you're having doubts...
But shouldn't you get your blood checked at a health care center first?
You're getting hesitant now after you've done it with her 7 fucking times?w
Break up with her immediately. Change your phone number too.
There should be a girl like Kansai around every corner in Kansai. Just go to that place called Umeda in Osaka or something.
>>306
I'm stuck in Hokkaido too. Guess I'll go hang out in the Oodoori subway station.
The question is, does Fujoshi really like you, Pork Cutlet?
If all she wanted is distract herself from getting dumped and have sex with the next best guy, and that happened to be you, I'd stay away from her...
ttp://www.yuimediainc.com/av_images/ryoko_fukada_title.jpg
She looks like a 75% version of this.
I'm in Hakodate though...
You're not officially dating her, are you?
With Christmas right around the corner, why don't you try asking her to be your girlfriend? If you're lucky, you might get to marry a rich woman.
And come Christmas Eve, she might let you have seicross with her in a Santa costume...
Pork Cutlet, which religion do I have to join to be blessed by the gods like you!?
Then she's perfectly fine.
Die. Please just die.
You can walk around in Umeda as much as you want, you'll never get to know a girlwww
I'm so tired of this life.
Santa costume sounds (・∀・) GOOD!!
When I broke up with my old friend with benefits, it went like this:
We stopped calling each other and wrote e-mails instead.
↓
We stopped seeing each other because neither of us had time for the other.
↓
Our e-mails got shorter, and more time went by between them.
↓
We drifted apart just like that.
It took us about half a year.
She was a lot like your cosplay girl, personality-wise.
Don't make any hasty decisions before you've seen what her place looks like.
Okay.
I'll bear it in mind.
>>308>>310
So I'm not the only one who thought she was weird...
>>309
I'll try asking her if she wants to go to a health care center with mew
>>312
I feel like that's all I am to her...
Go after tourists on Mount Hakodate.
The hiking trail was closed for good today though. From now on, the ropeway is the only way to get to the top of Mount Hakodate.
What if it was some eloquent trap or what if she had a venereal disease!?
Shut the fuck up, I'm not jealous!
Ohh! I love the Santa costume ideaw
>>317
I doubt my luck will continue though.
>>318
Yeah, she's quite my type.
>>320
Okay.
>>323
I'll use your post as a reference when it should come to that.
If not, I think I'm going to take a bath in a bit.
Ah, I know that picture. I saw it the first time you posted it.
I'm gonna put a curse on you.
Well, I hope you have a nice bath...
I'll be holding a fashion show by myself while waiting for a call.
I wonder what's taking her so long...
Oh come on, Hakodate is full of sightseeing spots.
Okay.
I'll be careful.
>>328
Yeah, I guess she's too easy.
Then how about that bridge, what was it called, Ebisubashi?
Also, don't kill yourself.
What if Kansai, Loli Jugs and co. are finished with work and talking about you right now, Molester?
What if she let them all listen to your message on her answering machine...? shake shake
Ebisubashi is not a dating spot!
It's just an urban legend!
Sorry.
You're getting too carried away! Get yourself back down to earth before you hurt yourself!
That's what you get for leaving weird messages on her answering machine...
If there's still no call from her after 11 pm, why don't you try calling her again?
Tell her you wanted to thank her personally.
>>336
Confess your love to Fujoshi via e-mail or phone before Molester gets a call from Kansai!
Prove you're a VIPPER!
I know people call it Pick-Up bridge, but there are rarely any girls to pick up there.
When I'm reading threads like this, I get all excited and everything,
but the more excited I feel, the more depressed I get when I finish reading and go back to my lonely self.
I should really take a bath now.
Ask her how she feels about you.
Do it before you seriously fall in love with her.
You fall for her, you lose. (´･д･`)
I do care about Molester and his future,
but I'm more curious about Pork Cutlet now.
There's something weird about the way she interacts with him.
Not bad considering how I came up with it on the spot.
>>345
So all I believed in was just an urban legend? il||li _|￣|● il||li
But as you can see, you can get laid just by heading to Shinjuku to look for someone.
There must be some place in Osaka where you can do the same thing. Not that I've ever been in Osaka.
What? Now!?
Let me ponder on it a bit more.
>>346
I wanted to ask her how she feels about me a few times already,
but firstly, I don't know how to bring it up, and secondly, I'm easily overwhelmed by Fujoshi's incessant chatter... orz
>>348
A mental case, huh...
She could be dangerous...
Not a chance.
You've got a much better chance waiting to get picked up by a girl than picking up one.
Until then, enjoy slurping up her delicious juices.
Hang in there, Molester!
I'd head there instantly.
Thank you.
I'll treasure the name you've given me, Father.
>>353
Thanks for rooting for me.
It'd be great if you could give me advice too. (;´Д｀)
Just ask her in an e-mail.
"What do you think about me?"
You should ask her straight out.
You could ask her on the phone too, but she might just dodge the question. (´･д･`)
I don't want to spoil the party, but do it elsewhere.
Heck, start your own thread and the people who care can move there.
Don't confess your love to her if you're not sure about it.
You'll wish you hadn't.
I can relate to Molester more.
Pork Cutlet should just start his own thread.
To be honest, I think she's just using you as a distraction from her ex-boyfriend. As soon as she finds a new love, she'll dump y-
Is that right～?
You can't pick up any girls there?
>358
It used to be Ikebukuro west gate park.
Now it's... Shinjuku Nichoumew
Really?
I can ask her via e-mail?
Thanks for the advice.
The only people I can rely on right now are you guys in Molester's thread. ･ﾟ･(ﾉД`)･ﾟ･｡
And when you see a group of women ordering something cheap and having a chat, smile and wave to them. That's all it takes.
He's a perfect filler for inbetween Molester's posts.
There's no need to reply to every post though, Pork Cutlet.
Also, don't confess your love to her yet.
It'll only make me feel more miserable than I already am.
You can forget about picking up girls in the Minami shopping district as a whole.
I think nowadays it's more likely to get picked up by a girl .
× Pork Cutlet → Filler for inbetween Molester's posts
〇 Molester → Filler for inbetween Pork Cutlet's posts
Call her unprepared and you'll just end up shooting yourself in the knee like Molester did.
Hence, I've come to the conclusion that it's best to ask her in an e-mail.
You're not in a position to be talking about feeling miserable, you lucky bastard.
Lol.
I feel like crying after reading your post. ･ﾟ･(つД`)･ﾟ･
I heard there's a so-called Pick-up Street in Osaka. Is it another urban legend?
(´-`).｡oO( Though if I were to pick up girls, I'd want to do it in a shopping district full of cute girls. )
Okay.
I'd lost my composure for a bit there.
Sorry.
I'll give it a bit more thought before I decide whether to confess my love to her or not.
You're miserable without Pork Cutlet.
Oops. I meant to write
You're miserable already without Pork Cutlet.
Thank you. ･ﾟ･(ﾉД`)･ﾟ･｡
I'll try asking her casually in an e-mail.
Pork Cutlet, try not to get too deeply involved with her yet.
I feel like Fujoshi will use it to her advantage if you confess your love to her first.
Wait until she brings it up.
Well, back in high school when I still had friends, I used to supply them with CD-ROMs full of wonderful opportunities to meet cute 2D girls.
Hang in there.
I need to step up my game too... Lady just asked me if I can do it four times in one day too...
(´-`).｡oO( She's watching this thread... Or rather, I'm being watched. )
I'll take all of your opinions into consideration and give it a lot of thought.
I'll make sure to report back when something new happens.
For now, I'm going to go back to being an Anonymous.
Sorry for derailing the thread.
ﾉｼ
Do you mean the area around Shinsaibashi OPA?
Hmm... I've never tried it there.
My sides are in orbitw
Still no calls?
Don't post too much about her or it'll backfire on you.
We'll summon you again when the thread's come to a standstill.
Hey, Lady, watch me too! Watch every single one of my nooks and crannies!
Uh-oh. (((´･ω･`)))
(;´-`).｡oO( I'm sorry, Lady... I'll be more careful from now on. )
Tell her your sexual prowess will rise threefold if she cosplays for you.
Thanks, man, I've calmed down a bit now.
I envy you, man. Things seem to be going so well for you and Lady... orz
Here's some friendly advice: don't do anything today. It'd just make her think you're annoying. Though I bet she already thinks you're annoying.
Read >>47!
Can you believe Coffee Lounge said something like that?
Get yourself a tripcode.
Let's just hang in there together. (ﾉД`)ヽ(ﾟДﾟ )
You hang in there too, Molester.
She's still not returning my callswwwwwwwww I guess it's overwwwwwwwww
Molester Man is here.
>>47
>>47
>>47
Hurry up and give her a call!
You're one slippery guy, Molester. It's hard to get hold of you.
You're at a crucial point. Keep your calm.
I think it'd be better to write her an e-mail.
Or do you want to call her, Molester?
Why don't you set an example and go first?
You guys... snitched on me...
Sorry, everyone, but I'll have to derail the thread a bit.
I love you.
And it won't happen again.
(PД`q)ﾟ.
ヾ( ﾟдﾟ)ﾉﾞ Dumbass!
Ahh...
You seem to be having so much fun...
I'm in my twenties, but I just started using a hair loss remedy called RiUP.
Does Lady really read the thread? Did she say anything about it?
I went to Shinjuku on that day too... _|￣|○
Goddammit...
(ﾉД`)ヽ(ﾟДﾟ ) May your hair roots do their best. pat pat
She says pretty much the same thing as you guys.
Like Molester is way too unpredictable and...
that he shouldn't do stuff without consulting the thread first... Stuff like that.
Reminds me of that time at my coming-of-age ceremony when I saw one of my classmates from middle school again.
I couldn't believe my eyes.
Please make us laugh like you always do. (´人`)
I seriously cried when I checked my hairline a few days ago.
>>432
Lady's comments are especially valuable since she's one of the few women in this thread.
Whether Molester will listen to her or not is a different question though.
Then no one will know that you're new because we all get new IDs, so please take part in this thread.
We could really use the opinions of a woman.
Coffee Lounge's posts are so useless.
I wish Lady would just start posting here.
Or has she simply not noticed my message yet?
I said I left my message on her answering machine, but on second thought, it must have been her voicemail... Maybe she's somewhere with no reception...
Wait... Did she buy those fashionable clothes on Saturday for a trip with her boyfriend!?
What? I thought she had no boyfriend.
She's probably sleeping because she's tired. Give her some time.
I'm sure she just hasn't checked yet.
She hasn't noticed it yet. Wait until she contacts you.
You really don't want her to think you're clingy.
>>438
You sure about that? (´･ω･`)
The package insert doesn't say anything about it......
Molester Man, have you ever done something right?
You can't expect Kansai to be thinking about you 24/7!
Fact is, you're just an acquaintance for her.
She must have a mountain of things that take precedence over returning your call, Molester. The fact that she hasn't replied yet doesn't mean shit.
Agreed.
OP's been out of control lately.
No, I don't know for sure.
But I think I read on the Baldness & Hairpieces board that it only works on the crown of your skull.
You ED victim!
Pork Cutlet headed straight to the beach with the cosplayer Fujoshi he met during the hunt for Molester. Then they went to a family restaurant and then a hotel where they did it three times.
The next day too, they met up, hurried to a hotel and did it 4 times, only this time she was in cosplay. In any case, Pork Cutlet's had his fill.
And me? I'm flying past the Milky Way in my imagination right now.
Thanks. ｡･ﾟ･(ﾉ∀`)･ﾟ･｡
How do I turn them back to normal?
Am I the only one?w
Change your resolution.
Here I go!
We can't expect anything new to happen today, can we?
>>451
I see.
Well, I have a receding hairline in the front.
I basically look like Vegeta now.
Right click on desktop → Properties → Settings → Increase resolution
Not sure if joke or bait.
Meh, who cares. Right-click anywhere on the desktop → Properties → Settings tab → Get frisky
That's the best thing about the second chapter. Isn't he cute? Our problem child.
But you guys answered my question anyway... (つД｀)
I have really thin hair, so I'm likely to go bald... orz
Don't worry, your hair is your life-long friend.
After all, the kanji for "hair" 髪 contains the kanji for "long" 長 and "friend" 友.
Shut up, baldy.
So I'm going to go bald too, huh... orz
What did you just say?
You too, baldy.
Let me ask just in case... You did turn off silent mode, right?
I get all nervous when I suddenly have to talk to some machine. Don't you?"
Send this to Kansai.
Sorry. I mean, thank you.
>>457 is an e-mail I got from a friend. I told him to come here and thank you guys once he's solved his problem.
Thanks from me too.
Umm... Nope.
Okay.
Don't worry, no harm done.
And that's how OP turned into Stalker Man.
Any more messages or calls now would be crossing the line.
A normal e-mail would have been so much better than that damn answering machine message.
Then stalk her.
Is he sulking?
Maybe she just hasn't noticed OP's message yet...?
A conventional answering machine would show a notification on its display.
How does a cell phone voicemail (?) do it?
I don't know because I don't have a cell phone contract... I guess it's different for every provider?
Cell phones show an icon saying that there's a message in your voicemail.
And you call yourself a VIPPER?
You can tell us VIPPERs anything, my friend. Maybe we can help you.
>>493
Interesting. And it works like that with all providers?w
THAT'S OKAY, WE'RE ALREADY BORED.
I'm so glad I finally caught up with the thread.
I don't know if anyone remembers, but I'm the one who asked for a summary site quite a long time ago.
To think someone took the time to actually make one!!
As a thanks, I'll make sure the admin of the site gets the South Korean seaweed packs I swiped from the hotel breakfast.
Your ID says ED...
Come on, tell us. I'm sure we can figure out somethingw
Oh shit, everyone get away from him!
That would be moe, wouldn't it?
Now I get it. Your post helped me understand why you guys like Kansai so much.
Ahh, now I see... Kansai is cute!
That is moe indeed.
Incidents related to Molester only occur when Molester isn't posting.
Since he's taking this long to post something, he must be busy with something.
Even if he were to post this, something tells me that we wouldn't lose our shit like we used to before.
That's it!
He's watching the rerun of SAKUSAKU.
Damn, my heart is beating so fast right now (;´Д｀)
Post it.
It's here━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━( ﾟ∀)━( ﾟ)━( )━( )━(ﾟ )━(∀ﾟ )━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━!!
It's here━━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━━!!
You better ask her about what we talked about earlier.
I'm copying it all into Notepad.
Sorry.
Get yourself a trip.
Coffee Lounge, you're not sulking because someone called you annoying, are you? Where are you?
Ignore the haters. Come out.
it was the contents of her e-mail that made your heart beat faster?
Me too, man. Me too.
Testing my new tripcode...
Me: Saturday would be fine. I don't have to work on Saturday.
Fujoshi: Let's meet up on Saturday then!!
Me: Okay, Saturday it is then. By the way, how do you feel about me, Fujoshi?
Fujoshi: I like you!! It's fun to hang out with you and I think we're sexually compatible too!! Sorry, I gotta go to bed now. Work is early tomorrow. Good night. (kiss)
Me: Good night. (kiss)
You sure about that? I had disastrously bad seicross with an actually mentally unstable woman the other day and it wasn't fun at all...
SHE'S GOT YOU NOW
>>537
Please elaborate.
Please elaborate.
How can you be so casual with her...?
Was Mr. >>1 really mistaken for a molester?
Come back after you've read the summary site.
You're not Kansai, are you?
Go out with her already.
Don't worry, she's just a bit mentally unstable, likes to jump to conclusions and is generally a bit out of control. Other than that, she's fine.
Thanks, everyone.
There's no turning back now.
Accept your fate.
>>540
It's nothing worth talking about really...
Besides, it's Pork Cutlet's turn right now. I don't want to disturb it...
I don't know what to do... orz
Is this a joke or a bait?
Oh well, fuck it. People get mistaken for molesters all the time,
but this is a success story that starts with such a misunderstanding. And we can't get enough of it.
Ahh...
Sorry... orz
What's there to hesitate about?
Are you one of Molester's acquaintances or associates?
Looks like he managed to fix his desktop thanks to you guys.
Huh, no, I'm not from Kansai.
Why does everyone talk about Kansai lately? Please stop...
You should just go out with her.
If she really is a nutcase, all you have to do is dump her like her ex-boyfriend did.
In that case, it'd be interesting to just prepare for the worst and go out with her.
However, it's probably better if you don't show her too much affection for now, even if you'd like to.
I don't see the problem thenw
They say if you find a woman you truly love, hurry up and get her pregnant...
Or is it the other way around in your case?
Think about it hard before you make up your mind.
You see, there are too many spoiled girls among fujoshi.
But they both said they like each other. What more do you want?
Then you should already know what to do.
Fujoshi loves you.
You love Fujoshi.
Result: Lots of seicross
Maybe it's your turn now to make up your mind, Pork Cutlet.
I'm so nervous right now.
Thank you for all the advice, guys!!!
I think I'll confess my feelings to her even though it's a bit early. (;´Д｀)
But I'll make sure to think it over carefully until Fujoshi sends me an e-mail tomorrow evening.
This thread is about the following three stories:
Molester Man and Miss Undie/Kansai/Loli Jugs/Miss Yamaoka/Glasses/Crab
Pork Cutlet and Fujoshi
Coffee Lounge and Lady
SHE'S GOT THE DOUGH TO FINANCIALLY SUPPORT YOU
But just look at her e-mails, man...
Seeing how her ex-boyfriend dumped her all of a sudden, she must be quite the pain in the ass.
And I'm not being biased, just saying it as I see it.
It's reassuring to hear all your opinons.
I'm really sorry for derailing the thread repeatedly.
I'm going back to being anonymous.
ﾉｼ
Twisted minds think alike～
What they truly love and devote their lives for = 2D
What makes them horny and gets them off = 3D
All he'd have to is put up with her.
To me, it sounded like "Tsk, didn't think he was the type to ask annoying questions like that. Guess I'll just say I like him, and pretend I'm going to bed.".
There's no need to confess your love to her. What's it gonna change? You're basically dating her already. Minus the drama.
Eh? What's wrong with them?
Please explain.
You don't wanna risk getting involved with weird people.
Come back when you find yourself at a crossroad of life again and can't make up your mind～
What am I saying? It's your duty as a VIPPER to report back until the end!!
Wasn't it suggested that she was just born into a rich family?
She's the kind of girl to say "Yeah! I like you!" like it was no big deal after only 3 days of meeting, you know?
It's great that she can be so honest about her feelings, but that honesty is what scares me...
Well, they've already gotten physically intimate with each other... I don't see how her saying she likes him makes a difference now.
Besides, it'd have been weird if she'd had seicross with him even though she didn't like him.
I'm just wondering if Fujoshi's answer to Pork Cutlet's unexpected question was serious or not.
I can't shake off this feeling that she doesn't like him in the romantic sense...
There are still some posts about me.
I swear I'll give the matter a lot of thought while rereading all your advice.
But it's late now, I'll just lurk a little longer and then go offline.
Sigh... My heart's still beating like crazy. (;´Д｀)
ﾉｼ Good night, everyone.
It's safest and best if your partner has an average job with an average salary.
It won't change the fact that it'll be an interesting experience for him.
I'm here to read about Molester, not Pork Cutlet.
I envy you guys. Once you're married and got kids, you can't have crazy adventures like that anymore.
It makes for a good opportunity for a fresh new start.
(・∀・)人(・∀・)
What's the problem with Pork Cutlet reporting from time to time? It's not like there's always something happening on Molester's side.
If Molester was the only one allowed to report in this thread, we'd just end up forcing him to do something stupid to keep the thread alive.
Let me tell you a nice little story about that.
Men don't say "I'll love you forever." easily.
It's because they know there's no guarantee that they'll always be in love with her.
Women, on the other hand, say "I'll love you forever" easily.
It's because at that moment in time they feel like they'll be in love with him forever.
But at the same time, they fall out of love as easily.
The reason is simple: "Back then, I really thought I'd be in love with you forever, but I'm not anymore."
They fall in love easily and fall out of love easily.
That's what women are like.
Get stabbed by someone and die.
I'm just worried she might suddenly go
"I slept with someone else because we had a fight and I was still irritated." or
"I realized I love someone else more. Let's break up. Bye bye."
for example.
We need characters like Pork Cutlet to emphasize how miserable Molester is in comparisonw
Maybe I should go to bed.
it ignores my posts too.
Good night━━━━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━━━━!!
I bet he's just lurking.
I'll off myself!
I know what women are like, but she's a bit too easy...
Something similar happened to me once and it didn't work out at all.
I'm just worried about Pork Cutlet, is all...
but don't forget to console the other guys who were out there looking for Molester on that day and had to go home empty-handed...
Give this man a medal!
He speaks the truth.
Are you guys watching TV? Did the Ungirls' unfunniness leave you all speechless or what?
What am I talking about, I'm already married.
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
Or is he practicing his snake charming skills?
Ihihihihi.
Really? The way I imagine it, it'd be more funny than cool.
It'd make him look like one hell of a snake charmer.
Don't post with a name a minute after you said you'd return to being anonymous.
Apologizing for derailing the thread doesn't mean you can do it again and again.
Also, don't use a tripcode. You'll be welcome here if you keep these points in mind.
But how are we supposed to know it's him without a tripcode?
I wanna hear his story from him, not some impostors trying to be funny.
Without a tripcode, there'll just be more impostors.
I don't give a fuck who it is. щ(ﾟДﾟщ) COME ON!
Dude, you're so Punk.
I wish I could tell this to my younger self and pat him on the back too.
Dude, you're so Rock.
It feels wrong to call her Fujoshi at this point.
Make it CosGirl or something.
Dude, you're so Pop.
Dude, you're so Techno.
Dude, you're so Muneo House.
Dude, you're the vocalist of WANDS, aren't you?
Dude, you're such a fried chicken.
Dude, you're so New Wave.
Dude, you're so Sonic Boom.
Dude, you're so ED.
Dude, you're so Jazz.
Dude, you're so mean.
ED = Endless Dreamer
Dude, you're such an endless dreamer.
Aren't we all?
Congrats. But try not to get too emotionally involved with her, okay?
Women like her tend to be extremely self-centered.
She'll just wear you out and only see you when she feels like it.
For her, men are like batteries that she can use to charge herself with and toss away when they're empty.
Living vibrators that only serve to fill the holes in her body and her soul.
Which is why I want to say the following to you:
Act out all your sexual fantasies on her! Fuck her like there's no tomorrow. Don't hold back.
But try not to catch a diseasew
Dude, you're such a hopeless romantic.
( ﾟ∀ﾟ)彡 Boobs! Boobs!
⊂彡
( ﾟ∀ﾟ)彡 Boobs! Boobs!
⊂彡
.∧__,,∧
（´・ω・`）
(つ夢と）
｀ｕ―ｕ´
That is VIP QUALITY.
http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
You can't stand being left alone and this is the system you chose...
Let's just hope it'll be someone who is good at heart.
Maybe it's just me, but I can feel from your post how hard-boiled you are, and it makes me hard.
Dude, you're so soft-boiled.
Have fun cutting yourself.
∧＿∧
（ill ´Д｀）
ﾉ つ!;:i;l ｡ﾟ・
と_＿）i:;l|;:;::;:::⊃
⊂;::;.,.';;;;'::.:.;::.⊃
but now even Tsukuyomi has finished airing.
I doubt she'll contact me today. I'm going to bed.
Good night.
I'll go to bed too.
Good night.
There's always tomorrow.
Don't be sad though. Kansai is sure to reply sooner or later. Hang in there, Molester.
Molester, tomorrow is another day and the sun will rise.
When tomorrow comes, the sun will shine on everyone because the sun doesn't discriminate...
That's right, the sun will shine on both you and Kansai...
Thank you, guys. I feel like the VIPPERs are a little kinder than normal today.
Exactly. The only difference is that the night is a bit longer for some. That's all there is to it.
Pork Cutlet → Winner
Molester Man → Loser
Can someone confirm this??
The chairman of the committee inside my head says it's not wise to celebrate a victory before the match is over!!
'`,､('∀`) '`,､
Let's just hope that Molester hasn't given up yet...
>>669 Correct.
Add Coffee Lounge to the list of winners while you're at it.
Molester, Pork Cutlet, Coffee Lounge → Winners
VIPPER → Losers
Hang in there, OP!
Your bodacity to not only call yourself a loser but everyone around you has given me a boner.
The only thing that counts here is whether you've had seicross or not.
Mr. Molester hasn't had seicross yet, has he?
I haven't either...
Molester >>>>> Pork Cutlet
Luck
Molester = Pork Cutlet
Life
Molester <<< (unclimbable wall) << Pork Cutlet
I can agree with that.
Pork Cutlet >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Molester
The store I was interested in had temporarily closed though, so I was standing around absentmindedly in front of its closed doors,
when a girl next to me seemed to be in the same situation as me. She was like "Ahaha, guess it's not our lucky day." and we laughed together.
She had short hair, was kinda plain but not boring and was more pretty than cute.
Just when I was thinking to myself that she's exactly my type of girl, she asked me,
"Umm, if you don't mind... would you like to go shopping somewhere else with me?"
I immediately replied yes.
She seemed to have the same interests as me and, what's more, she was fun to be around. I'd only met her a few hours ago, but I felt like I'd known her ages.
Even though I'm a coward who's never asked out a girl in his life,
I summoned all my courage and asked her "Can we meet again?", but then I woke up.
Good morning, guys.
Good morning.
The ghost Muneo that lives in my cell phone says "No.".
She's probably still in bed.
I don't mind posting a pic of Muneo, but he was bragging that he's invisible to idiots, so I can't guarantee that you'll be able to see him.
Muneo is a mischievous ghost that lives in my cell phone.
Even though I set an alarm before going to sleep, it doesn't go off the next morning because Muneo deactivated it.
When I flip my cell phone open, Muneo randomly turns it off.
When I want to call someone with three bars of reception and take too long to enter the phone number, Muneo makes the bars disappear one after another until I'm out of reception.
That's the kind of ghost he is.
>>693
Probably.
Besides, I can see him and I'm an idiot, so he must have been lying when he said idiots can't see him.
...though I guess it's not really early for normal people.
Well, I am a university student.
And I'm a SAKUSUCKER.
Is that a famous copypasta?
Are you going to university today?
Yeah, it's pretty famous.
Of fucking course.
>>700
EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!?
My late grandma used to often say "Guys who reply to copypasta will never get laid.".
Eh? >>700 is a copypasta!?
He got trolled so hard.
A pretty famous one.
Compared to them, I...
||
∧||∧
（ / ⌒ヽ
| | | Why is my life so shit...
∪ / ﾉ
| ｜|
∪∪
；
-━━-
Your life may be shit, but... don't kill yourself.
| ／＿＿＿__ ヽ〟 ＿＿＿_ ─────
|. |－ 、－､ヽ| ／-､ - ､ ＼ ￣￣￣
|. ｍn| ・|・ |- |/-| ・|・ |- ､ ヽ
し ヽ＿| －o －′/ `-●－′ ＼ _!
＼ヽ. ── （| ── | ── | （ __ ） ───
＼ ▽▽ | ── | ── |. / / ─────
| ヽ（＿__|＿＿＿ ﾉ/ / ─────
_|＿＿＿_| `━ ６━━━/ /
/￣j | |/ ──┐ヽ |
l⌒∨＼/￣￣|￣/⌒ヽヽ.＿ ノ i |＾ヽ
＼ / ＼|. |` ── ′ _ｊ. | ＿＿＿ That is VIP QUALITY.
` -′ ` － ´￣￣￣￣￣ `－′ ───── http://ex7.2ch.net/news4vip/
Now I'm at work and I've read everything I'd missed since then. Good morning, everyone.
Hope there'll be news from Kansai today.
I'll be following this thread at work today too.
I'm just afraid my boss might notice.
Don't worry.
You're not alone.
I'm doing the same thing. We're in this together.
I don't get along with the other students from my seminar anywaywww
So here I am sitting all alone in the computer lab.
Still nothing, Molester?
Don't tell me she's really come to hate you... nah, no way.
But hey, it's only been half a day so far.
Let's give her some more time.
What if she blocked your numbe-WHOA WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING? LET ME GOASDFGHJKLMNBVCXZQWERTYUIOP
That message he left on her answering machine, does it really require a reply?
but it's always been Kansai to send you an e-mail first so far.
Now, if she suddenly stops doing that, I don't see what you can do except wait.
Or do we send her a "SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP" e-mail?
133: Anonymous : 04/11/10 18:10:17
>There's a thread on a certain board in 2ch right now that might surpass Train Man.
>The OP of that thread
>- ignores other people's advice
>- doesn't even ask others for advice in the first place
>- and does whatever he wants all the time.
>What a wonderful guy.
>But then again, the inhabitants of the thread aren't any better. They
>- are irresponsible
>- just want to make noise
>- and don't care about anything as long as they're having fun.
>Most of the time, they don't even try to help him out.
>Despite all that, I think the thread surpassed Train Man yesterday.
>Make sure to look for the thread if you're interested.
>Newfags who only came here after reading the Train Man novel will have a hard time finding it though.
http://human5.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/male/1099099074/133
>- ignores other people's advice
>- doesn't even ask others for advice in the first place
>- and does whatever he wants all the time.
The inhabitants of this thread
>- are irresponsible
>- just want to make noise
>- and don't care about anything as long as they're having fun.
I lol'd.
Let me add "The thread inhabitants get laid, but not the OP." to the list.
I wish they wouldn't post about this thread elsewhere.
This thread is for VIPPERs only.
My "I want to have disastrous seicross with a cute mentally unstable woman" syndrome is showing its ugly head again.
Ahh, I need something to soothe my chest.
From what I see, quite a few of us actually care about OP and try to help him with all we have...
He really shouldn't have left that message on her answering machine, huh?
The problem is that he simply doesn't follow it.
If she doesn't reply today, maybe try e-mailing her one last time?
After all, you don't want to seem clingy.
You could send her a pic of your snakes or something. She wanted to see them, didn't she?
Please post a pic of them here too. I'd love to see them.
Agreed. If she really doesn't reply, then sending her an e-mail would be his last bet.
I think an e-mail with a pic of his snakes attached has the highest chance of getting a reply.
She might find them creepy though...
Or better yet, he could take a number of pics, and we tell him which one to send.
There's no reason at all why she'd stop being friends with him.
If only Kansai hadn't acted so prematurely and ruined the Miss Undie route...
Can Molester still become normal friends with Miss Undie?
When she kept Molester company that night, did she only want to do Molester one last favor? Or did she want to get closer to him?
Send her this creepy e-mail.
I bet she doesn't give a rat's ass about all that.
You guys are just being too self-conscious.
Dude, this thread wouldn't exist if that was true.
then she might be thinking she should put some distance between them, so he can cool off his head.
But if she could think that far ahead, she'd be pretty much the perfect woman.
The truth is probably that she simply doesn't think the message warrants an immediate reply.
From how things stand now, it'd take way too long to turn this around and get a happy end, so I'd rather OP just went straight for a bad end.
That's why she only cared about cheering up Molester that night and kept him company without hesitation.
But now she's realized what she's done and doesn't know what to reply because it's all so awkward.
Imagining her like this makes me hard.
This should solve all your problems.
You're a pretty cool guy.
Ever since Coffee Lounge posted that Lady is watching this thread,
I couldn't bring myself to post stuff like that anymore.
Some VIPPER I am.
I'd bet 3000000 seicrosses on it.
Dude, you're a VIPPER! Ignoring her should be child's play for you!
Don't sweat it. The trick is to convince yourself that even women enjoy that kind of posts!
Take me for an example. I sometimes post on 2ch even though my wife is right next to me.
Most of the time, I close the post window as soon as she looks in my direction though...
Right...... Yeah, you guys are so right.
Thanks for reminding me what VIP QUALITY is all about.
This thread is about Molester and nothing else.
Alright, Lady, hope we get along in this thread for as long as it lives!
Or maybe she's been posting anonymously all this time?
Ohh, this has got to be Lady!
Have seicross with me too! Please!
and if that wasn't enough, Molester's helplessness awakened her maternal instincts.
But despite her budding feelings for Molester,
she's decided to put some distance between them for now.
Kansai you so moe.
I don't even know where to start explaining.
He's talking about Nagao Kanji, a character from Tokyo Love Story, who happens to have the same nickname as our Miss Understanding (Kanchi).
↑ This post is probably by Lady.
Don't give up, Molester! I'm rooting for you.
Oh well, most people don't notice an answering machine message until they try to call someone else.
You know, actually it'd be better if she notices it in two or three days,
because then she might go "Ah, Molester left a message three days ago... Oh no... Why did I not notice it sooner...?".
That way, she'd feel more inclined to reply.
He's here━━━━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━━━━ !!
You should have told us that you called her!
Anyways, I didn't have any lessons in the computer lab today, unfortunately. Feeling lonelier than usual, I was just glad when lectures were over.
I wanted to quickly go home and browse 2ch, but just when I was sitting in the bus home fiddling with gikoNavi on my cell phone, the words
Incoming call
popped up on the screen along with a big picture of Hisui.
I managed to flip my cell phone shut without panicking or losing my shit. Someone might have seen Hisui though.
I'm just glad I'd turned on silent mode. Or everyone in the bus would have heard my ringtone.
But since I don't have any friends at my university, who cares what they think about me, right?
I had to google how to read the damn kanji for this.
You couldn't read it? It's Konjacw
It said "One missed call". I let my eyes wander to the next line timidly... "From Kansai"
She called meｰーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーー！！！
I wanted to call back on the spot, but I had enough common sense not to call her while on a bus.
"I wonder what she wanted to talk to me about..."
is what kept going through my head until I got to my station.
As soon as I'd gotten off the bus, I wanted to dial her number, but there was only one bar of charge left!
Of course. I'd been using it all day during the lectures to play Tetris and browse 2ch with i-mona (>>778 was a mistake, sorry)
because I didn't have access to the computer lab.
But when I thought about it, I realized there was no real reason for me to call back right away.
Having calmed down, I went to buy a book I'd been wanting to get for a while now before I headed home.
No, it's not Konjac. I know it's read Hisui now, but I have no idea what it means.
Molester isn't talking about a bird called Kingfisher, is he? Because that's what it normally stands for.
Is it something anime-related?
OP seems calmer and more composed than normal.
Very good.
Could it be that you don't have any friends at university because you're always fiddling around with your cell phone?
Be that as it may, please continue.
It's from Tsukihime.
"SukuRan starts in thirty minutes..."
The time limit was 30 minutes. It wasn't like I had anthing specific to talk about though.
I just wanted to thank her for the other day, so 30 minutes were more than enough time.
Click, click, clack―――ring ring KER-CHAK
"Are you at university?"
"Hm? No, I just got home."
I was worried she'd start apologizing again, but she seemed to have returned to her usual self.
I was relieved, albeit a little surprised.
Sorry. Tsukihime doesn't say much to me...
Are you talking about Kouyama Mitsuki from Full Moon wo Sagashite?
Is SukuRan really that important for you?w
But man, you seem to be having so much fun these days.
Just record it if you want to watch it so bad. Besides, SukuRan isn't even good.
Google for "Tsukihime Hisui". If you still don't get it then, ignore it.
"All manga in weekly magazines are shit."
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100597240/
But knowing the truth isn't everything!
／ ￣￣￣￣￣＼
／ ＼
/ ヽ
／￣＼ l ＼,, ,,／ |
,┤ ト.| （●） （●） ｜
| ＼＿／ ヽ ＼＿＿_／ |
| ＿_（￣ ｜ ＼／ ノ
| ＿_）＿ノ
ヽ＿＿＿） ノ
You linked to the wrong post again! How does it feel?
Is it embarrassing?
It's embarrassing, isn't it?
"No, four. Maybe lectures end a little later my university?"
"Hmm... At ours, they end at..."
We talked about stuff every student talks about at this time of the year like midterm exams, assignments and so on.
"Well, I do attend lectures, but I usually sleep through them. That's why I don't have any notes. In fact, I don't have a clue what the exams will cover."
"Same here. Why don't you just ask a friend to let you copy their notes?"
"I don't have any friends."
"I know."
"Don't make me say it then."
"No way, it's too fun."
Hmm... If I remember correctly, it was normal small talk up to this point.
I googled it, but there were hardly any pictures of it.
And I don't want to miss Molester's report, so I decided to ignore it.
OP sure knows how to create suspense.
Up to that point?
I see. It's the calm before the storm, huh?
I'm not the guy you're quoting and I'm not an expert either,
but Tsukihime seems to be a popular eroge which allows you to get it on with a vampire and even your little sister.
And Hisui seems to be one of the main protagonist's maids.
That's all I know.
There. Make sure to memorize it, VIPPERs.
It'll be on the test.
Listening to "LOVE LOVE SHOW" by The Yellow Monkey now.
, '´..:..: ..:.:.:..:.. ヽ、
／ ／..:.:/ , ::. ヽ.
/ 〃 〃 / ヽ i :. い.
/ // //! l! ヽ .:il .:/! .::! .:l. !
,' 1i .:::il_Li_{ l_,ﾑ_/__! ::l ::ｌ::: |
|.::/l !: ::;ｲ「i__ヾ` l//___ i`ﾒ､ :l::::: l
V |ﾊ:.:::liｨ下ヽ 'ｨ'i⌒ヽ/ｌ :/::::い
ヽ∧{ i ﾋノ ヒジ /／ ヽ::::ﾊ "No way, it's too fun."
/.:ヽﾑ w ' w ,.イﾉ ） /!:::::ﾊ
r=ﾍ＿/__,.ノ /ヽ 「｀7 ,ィー 7:l､ヽ､_:.＼
_,. ｸi. ',ヽ､_l /／ l::＼｀´ _,. ' {:::ﾄ:::::: l ヾ､ ￣
く / ,ﾙｨ ヽ }＼__,. -一 ' 丁 ヽ!_＼ | ヽ､
l i / /-っ_} / { ⌒ヽ ,. ～ ｀ヽ､
`{ / /// |/ ヽ ＼ ／ ＼
>but Tsukihime seems to be a popular eroge which allows you to get it on with a vampire and even your little sister.
So it's a game, not an anime.
I see. Thx.
I can't seem to memorize it, teacher.
My brain seems to be rejecting it.
Sorry to disappoint you, but I don't think it's embarrassing to correct a mistake you've made.
And his nice handling skills too.
Kansai is cute even when she's just having normal small talk.
But what if Kansai is ugly like Hanazawa from Sazae-san?
how I bought myself a T-shirt that goes well with the clothes she picked out for me...
"...and you know, I didn't have a T-shirt that looked good under that jacket. So I went to buy one."
"Ahh, yeah. I heard about it from Miss Understanding."
Her comment made even me, the Berserker Molester Train himself, a little uneasy. "Oh crap... That damned Miss Understanding... What else did she tell her?"
But well, if I wanted to thank her for last time, I had to talk switch to that topic sooner or later anyway. Bring it on!
"Ah, yeah, I called Miss Understanding the other day. I told her about it then."
"And I'm telling you that I already heard about it from her."
"Well..."
"Say, Molester."
I wanted to say "Well... I heard you had to work on that day. Thanks for keeping me company anyway."
but she interrupted me. I broke out in cold sweat.
Kansai's famous moe line:
Exercise 2
Please insert words into the brackets to complete Kansai's famous moe line.
( ), ( ).
Answer:
( NO WAY ), ( IT'S TOO FUN ).
>>794
( Hello ), ( I'm Doraemon ).
Answer:
( HELLO ), ( I'M DORAEMON ).
( Well ), ( I'm a girl ).
gafajflkdgaelaie;krhtje;t:el;gltualtokatiks
Oh Godwwwwwwww What is she trying to say?wwwwwwwwww
Is she telling him not to call her because of stuff she's already heard about?wwwwwwwww
>>815
Then no, sorry.
Not the correct answer, but I'll give you the points anyway.
Because Doraemon is moe.
This is yakui. Well, it wasn't really bad, but I was sweating bullets anyway.
Speaking of which, where does the expression "to sweat bullets" come from anyway? Does it suggest that your sweat drops are as big as bullets, or that your sweat drops fly off you at the speed of bullets?
While I was lost in thought, Kansai asked,
"What did Miss Understanding tell you?"
Oh shitｰーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーーー！！
This is bad! Really bad!! I should have asked the thread about how to answer this question before calling her!!
She'd caught me off guard.
I tried hard to remember the posts from yesterday.
"She did it to make up to you. I'm sure, she doesn't want you to know that she got into trouble because of it."
I remember reading a post like this...
"You could thank her for keeping you company without mentioning anything else. It'd be only natural to say thanks."
There were many posts like this too.
Damn, I have no idea which is better!
( Garlic ), ( it smells ).
Please tell me what exactly you find moe about Doraemon.
It's here━━━━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━━━━━!!!!!
You went berserk, huh!? You did, didn't you!!!???
Sorry. I lied when I said Doraemon is moe.
The voice actor, of course.
How come no one has posted this?
No, it's time for the "It will get me your sexual fluids." one.
I'd love to see what's normally going on in your headw
I hope you guys at least know that you're getting trolled! ｍ9(＾Д＾) Pfffhahaha
I doubt that...
VIPPERs love getting trolled, didn't you know? ｍ9(＾Д＾) Pfffhahaha
Yeah, I get that at least once a month.
1w1pGN6S is getting really annoying.
I said it! I actually said it!! I can't believe I chose to act clueless!!!!
It's as embarrassing as back when I was a child and my parents caught me pocketing a few thousand yen from grandpa's piggy bank,
and I chose to act like I didn't know what they mean even though they saw me!!
Nowadays, even grade schoolers don't use the "Eh? What do you mean?" act anymore.
"Eh!? Seriously? He's feigning ignorance!?"
"Only kindergarteners could get away with 'Eh? What do you mean?' nowadays!!"
"How lame!"
I was so flustered I heard high-pitched jeers in the back of my mind.
The members of the commitee inside my head were throwing eggs at me. No chicken eggs, but quail eggs. They hurt more because they're smaller and harder to break.
"I'm asking what Miss Understanding told you. She told you something, didn't she?"
Urk.
Guess, Molester is still Molester...... (´･ω･`)
The biggest loser there ever was.
AHHHHHHHH--------
Urk.
My heart can't take it. (´･ω･`)
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:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|( _●_) |:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
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:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::| ヽノ /|:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Just make sure to steer away from topics Kansai doesn't want to talk about.
Act clueless and say "I don't know, I don't remember." should the topic come up anyway.
Now, in this case, say "Heard you had to work on that day? Sorry. Let me treat you to something good. What do you want to eat?"
to switch topics and possibly avoid stepping on a landmine.
Thanking her and asking her out for dinner should be okay... But it's possible that there is a landmine somewhere close,
so try not to say anything unnecessary.
It's all over. Forget about thanking her.
All I can do now is continue the clueless act.
It's too late to turn back now!
It may be pathetic, but even if it's pathetic, even if this wasn't planned at all and just randomly turned out this way,
even so, I'm determined to......... feign ignorance!!
".........actually, Miss Understanding already told me what you talked about. On the phone. Yesterday."
"Yeah, sorry. She told me you had to work Sunday morning, broke a plate and got chewed out by the manager."
So much for my determination.
Kansai is Miss Understanding's co-worker at her part-time job.
She tried all kinds of things to mediate between Molester and Miss Understanding,
but Molester just wasn't Miss Understanding's type of guy.
Maybe it's because Kansai felt bad for Molester or it's just her personality, but she's continued to be helpful to him until now.
She is now Molester's new target of affection.
This isn't happening in real-time, you know?
I know.
You're such a hopeless guy. ｡･ﾟ･(ﾉД`)･ﾟ･｡
The phone call is already over and done with though.
That much I knew, but thanks.
".........actually, Miss Understanding already told me what you talked about. On the phone. Yesterday."
".........actually, Miss Understanding already told me what you talked about. On the phone. Yesterday."
".........actually, Miss Understanding already told me what you talked about. On the phone. Yesterday."
".........actually, Miss Understanding already told me what you talked about. On the phone. Yesterday."
".........yes."
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
I had no idea what was going through her head. She seemed mad at me for some reason.
I guess she didn't want me to know about it... Or is it because it took me so long to contact her...?
"Why did you act like you didn't know?"
"Well, you didn't tell me that you had to work on Sunday, so I thought maybe you didn't want me to know...?"
I'm so weak.
As weak as a newly adopted cat that lets itself get pushed around by the resident cats.
Yay! Yay!
"Kansai-tan! It's me! I want you to swallow my sperm in one big gulp!"
Did you make sure to tell her this?
I know exactly how long it lasted because I'd made sure I had a clock in sight since I didn't want to miss the beginning of SukuRan.
The silence lasted almost 30 seconds. So long.
"You're not feeling guilty now, are you?"
"Ueh!?"
I was completely flustered, unable to cope with the situation.
"What was that?"
"Nothing, I'm just a little nervous..."
"So?"
"Eh? What do you mean?"
I honestly had no idea what she meant.
What an irritating turn of events.
If it'd been me, I'd have long resorted to something like >>876.
Your priorities are messed up.
Seems like he's not only a loser, but insensitive too.
Plus, he's short. That's already a triple handicap. ｡･ﾟ･(ﾉД`)･ﾟ･｡
Y-Yeah, right?
To be honest, I was worried you guys were going to be weirded out when I posted it.
Reread it 10 more times.
No, it's not!
"No, no, no, it's not alright! It's probably my fault anyway, so tell me!"
For some reason, I'd directly assumed that I was at fault, but who cares.
"Nah, forget it."
"Come on, tell me. I can't apologize if I don't even know what I did wrong."
We'd gone silent again. Speaking of silent, I couldn't beat Silent Hill because it was too hard.
"................sigh... Why do you keep asking me about something I don't want to say?"
↑ I clearly remember how she said this. It was as if she'd given in like "Okay, fine, you win.".
It's here━━━━━━(ﾟ∀ﾟ)━━━━━━ !!!!! or is it?
No way! No fucking way!!
Kansai END???!!
Son, my dumb son! I told you a thousand times in VIP to learn to read the mood!
So what if girls are as fickle as April weather? Learn to read them anyway!
Goddammit! You should have just said "In any case, thank you for that." there!
Goddammit!
Well, what did she expect?
Anyone would react like "Eh? Eh? What? Tell me!" if you were told something like that. I would too.
She can't really blame him.
(ﾉ∀`) Oh boy.
Guess calling her was a mistake, huh?
Just one more 'l' and your ID could have been "loli".
I know what you mean, but still...
Well, whatever.
He really needs to work on his quick decision making.
"Now, listen here. I did all that to make up to you! Isn't it obvious that I wouldn't want you to know what I went through because of it?
Besides, it wasn't your business anyway."
So that's why she got mad... That guy in the thread who predicted this must be really smart.
"But I was really happy about it, so let me at least thank you for it."
"I wanted to be a cool woman that suffers for the sake of others without anyone knowing."
"What's so cool about a woman that breaks plates at work?"
"Shut up."
I somehow managed to clear the minefield.
∩＿∩ +
（0ﾟ・(ｪ)・） ba-dump ba-dump bear bear
（0ﾟつ旦O +
と＿_）__） +
Kansai is so cute.
Molester doesn't deserve her.
Kansai (*´Д`) pant pant
Such a good girl. I really wish I could............ marry her.
"I've fallen in love with you. Now let me drink your cum!"?
You stupid idiot! つД｀)･ﾟ･｡･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟ
Oh God... I'm starting to tear up.
Tell me where I have to go to meet Kansai.
Is that all you could come up with...?
Ain't nothing bad about sharing your embarrassing and shameful sides with each other.
Nah, Molester knows what he's doing. He's a lot better than us at teasing and stuff.
But only if it's Kansai he's talking to.
Count me in.
In other words, she's telling you that she loves you in a really roundabout way.
Kansai is a real keeper.
You're gravely mistaken if you think you would have managed to do it by yourself.
A woman like Miss Kansai who acts like everyone's older sister is perfect for a timid man like you, Mr. Molester.
Although Miss Kansai will be the one to call the shots in a relationship, she'll always make sure to bring out the best of you.
Return to the beginning
-----------------------------
The frequent use of abusive language and cynical comments is one of Molester's characteristics.
While it might turn off most people, Kansai doesn't seem to mind. On the contrary, it keeps their conversations going.
"Come on, you've already thanked me enough."
"But that was when I had no idea you were going so far just to keep me company.
That's why I thought I should thank you properly this time... Did you get my voicemail message?"
"What voicemail message?"
"You haven't heard it!? After hearing about what happened from Miss Understanding yesterday, I figured I'd thank you properly and
called your cell phone, but couldn't get through."
"Thank me properly...? Seriously, you don't need to worry about it so much."
"No, let me finish. I wasn't aware of it myself, but it seems like I was pretty down that night."
"Yeah! You were so down! The others were all worried about you on the train home!"
Umm... I'm pretty sure they were all just sleeping.
I'm just saying that one thoughtless remark can be enough to make you an inconsiderate asshole in women's eyes.
You won because of Kansai, not your own skills!
You're it.
http://ex7.2ch.net/test/read.cgi/news4vip/1100601103/
Make the new thread.
The next thread belongs to you.
Crabs.
Crabs.
Mr. Ramba Ral, please start the next thread.
Crab curry!
Crabses.
Crab paste.
"Anyone would have been worried! You had turned all pale. As pale as the giant cigarette man from the Nicorette commercial!"
"He's not pale, he's just plain white."
"You're right."
Ahh... I'm so glad we're back to normal... Oh shit!! Less than five minutes left till SukuRan starts!!
"Anyways, I didn't realize it then, but I'm sure it was thanks to you that I was able to cheer up."
"That's embarrassing."
"Don't say that."
"Well, I have an assignment to finish, so talk to you later."
"Oh okay, talk to you later."
"Bye bye."
So here I am, posting this while watching SukuRan and thinking to myself "As I thought, it's not nearly as funny as the manga.".
Slowpoke.
You didn't ask her out on a date to "thank her properly"...? Whoawwwwwww OKwwwwwwww
You picked SukuRan over Kansai!?
Let me say it again.
Your priorities are messed up.
Die. Why is SukuRan > Kansai for you!?
You should have talked to her longer. Fucking loser.
Why would you hang up there...?
SukuRan is lame.
In the end, you picked SukuRan over Kansai, huh?
I guess that's just the kind of guy you are.
No idea what SukuRan is though.
You had to choose between SukuRan and Kansai, and you picked SukuRan. I don't get it.
Hope this gets more media coverage than Train Man.
SukuRan >> Kansai >> Report back to this thread
I guess.
And should you forget to record it, there's always Winny.
Kansai is a nice girl.
She said "the others" to hide the fact that she was in fact the one who was worried about you.
It should be a lot easier now to call or e-mail her next time.
An odd manga where most of the plot revolves around the side-characters while the main character gets left behind.
Why couldn't you ask her out for lunch/dinner to thank her properly!?
You seriously make me wish you'd just kill yourself.
Are you fucking stupid?
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