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Summary of "I don't have anything to do, so I'll just send creepy e-mails to my buddy's little sister" 592899 views

2004/11/01 10:20 | Added by: Lewd Little Sister◆VcEpZgMo | Author: Anonymous
984 Name: ('A`) [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:15
It's a Friday night and I don't have anything to do. 

So I figured I'll try sending some creepy e-mails too. 
The target is my buddy's little sister. 

990 Name: 984 [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:19
I'm not sure what to write though. 
I got her e-mail addy when I once brought my wasted buddy to his place, 
but it's already been about 3 months since I last sent her an e-mail. 

997 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:23
Subject: I can't sleep and it's your fault...... 
Body: Kiss! Kiss me, baby, kiss me! My first kiss

I think I'll go with this for a start. 

9 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/03 22:24
1000 Name: ('A`) Anonymous Date:04/09/03 22:23 
If this is 1000, 984 will get punched by his buddy. 
1000 Name: ('A`) Anonymous Date:04/09/03 22:23 
If this is 1000, 984 will get punched by his buddy. 
1000 Name: ('A`) Anonymous Date:04/09/03 22:23 
If this is 1000, 984 will get punched by his buddy. 

16 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:29
Previous thread: >>996 
I'm just freelancer/part-timer trash. 
My buddy is the same. 
His little sister is a 20-year-old university student. 
My buddy still lives with his parents and he has this habit of ending up dead in front of my room every time he gets wasted. 
Once, when I was still in university, I dragged my wasted buddy to his place and handed him over to his little sister. 
We exchanged e-mail addies then because she said "Please contact me the next time my brother gets wasted.". 

Will this do? Or do you guys have any questions? 

20 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/03 22:30
>>16 
Thanks. 
So you don't have much contact with his little sister? 

25 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:31
>>20 
My buddy gets wasted → I e-mail her. 
I drag my buddy to his place → She receives us warmly. 
That's about it. 

30 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:37
Copy-pasted from my cell phone: 

[Subject] 
Re: I can't sleep and it's your fault...... 

[Body] 
Hey, Big Bro, it's been a while! 
Did big brother get wasted again? 
He's the one who wrote the e-mail, right? Kick him for me please. 


Ah, I forgot to mention that my buddy's little sister calls me "Big Bro" for some reason. 
It's weird considering how she calls her big brother just "big brother". 

36 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:39
Alright. 
I'm about to shit my pants. I think I'm already ready to quit! 

54 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:44
[Subject] 
××(← my buddy's name) is working today. 

[Body] 
While he's gone, I want to take you away like this
I'm serious. I might actually come take you away♪ 


Doesn't it sound like something some handsome guy would write? I'm biased against handsome guys. 

58 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/03 22:47
The songs you're referencing are so old. I'd say it's you who got wasted, "Big Bro". 

61 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:48
>>58 
Yeah, it does make me sound wasted. 

65 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/03 22:49
>My first kiss and I want to take you away like this 
You're in your mid-twenties, aren't you? 

68 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:50
>>65 
He said he's a university graduate and a freelancer/part-timer. 
Isn't it obvious? 

77 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:55
[Subject] 
Are you in a karaoke bar? 

[Body] 
I wish I had time for karaoke too. 
If it only wasn't for the report due on Monday... 


It's time to switch to sexual harassment, huh? 

82 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 22:58
I think I'll go with the "shower her with compliments just to make a dirty joke about cum" routine. 

Well, even if she were to cut ties with me, my buddy would never cut ties with me. 

91 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:00
[Subject] 
Re: Are you in a karaoke bar? 

[Body] 
But hey, you're so smart, ○○, you shouldn't have any problems with a report. 
I wish I was that smart. ×× and me were lucky to graduate from university, but we're still freelancer/part-timers because we're dumb as nails, ya know? 

85 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/03 22:59
>my buddy would never cut ties with me 

Reminds me of that comedy skit where that one guy goes "We're best friends, right?" and the other guy's like "Huh, hell no."w 

96 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:03
>>85 
No, what I mean is that my buddy and his little sister don't get along well and they try to stay out of each other's affairs. 
So even if his little sister was to get pissed at me, I don't think my buddy would really care. 
He didn't even seem to know that I exchanged e-mail addies with his little sister. 

93 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/03 23:01
Do people really use "ya know" in e-mails?w 

99 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:04
>>93 
Normal people don't, huh...... 
Does that mean, I was sending creepy e-mails all this time? 
_| ̄|○ 

101 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/03 23:05
>>99 
It's the kind of phrase women pretending to be men online use. 

107 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:10
[Subject] 
Re:Re: Are you in a karaoke bar? 

[Body] 
No, no, no. 
I'm not as smart as you think. 
I still feel terrible when I'm at university. Like a grade-schooler on the last day of summer holidays. 
Eep... 


Looks like I'm not complimenting her enough. 
It must be because I suck at making compliments. 
>>101 
Guess I'm a woman pretending to be a man online then........ 

113 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:15
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re: Are you in a karaoke bar? 

[Body] 
No, no, no, no. 
You must be really smart, ○○. 
You managed to get into ** university after all. 
I also hear your grades are great. 


I seriously suck at making compliments, ya know? Damn. 
That's right. I wouldn't be a creepy loser if I was good at it. 

122 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:21
[Subject] 
You're making me blush 

[Body] 
Flattery won't get you anything, y'know? 
I think you're pretty smart yourself, Big Bro. 
I know because I read your graduation thesis. 
Amazing stuff. 



Here I go━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 

129 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:23
[Subject] 
Re:You're making me blush 

[Body] 
Flattery won't get me anything? 
It'll get you to cum for me! 


I sent it. 
Ahahahahaha. 
Fuck, I actually sent it! 

138 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:24
_| ̄|○ 

148 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:25
No, she hasn't replied yet, 
but I really wish I could go back 5 minutes in time. 

162 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:30
[Subject] 
...huh? 

[Body] 
My big brother is there with you, isn't he? 
If he got drunk again, please just leave him by the roadside. 
Or feed him to the dogs, for all I care. 


.......should I give my buddy a call? 
Or should I give his little sister a call? 

163 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:30
I bet she's pissed at me now! 

168 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:31
[Subject] 
Re:You're making me blush 

[Body] 
Flattery won't get me anything? 
It'll get you to cum for me! 


I sent it again! 

173 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:32
[Subject] 
Re:You're making me blush 

[Body] 
Flattery won't get me anything? 
It'll get you to cum for me! 



I sent it a third time! 

176 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:32
[Subject] 
Re:You're making me blush 

[Body] 
Flattery won't get me anything? 
It'll get you to cum for me! 



A fourth time! 

182 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:33
I resent it three times in a row! 


;y=ー( ゚д゚)・∵. bang 

200 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:35
Ahhh. 
It's hard to control yourself when you're sending e-mails from a cell phone. 
Once you're finished writing the text, all you have to do is press the send button. 
And I'm the type of guy who'd press the button to launch a nuclear missile out of curiosity. Fuck. 

224 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:38
[Subject] 
I'm sorry 

[Body] 
Ahhh. 
It's hard to control yourself when you're sending e-mails from a cell phone. 
Once you're finished writing the text, all you have to do is press the send button. 
And I'm the type of guy who'd press the button to launch a nuclear missile out of curiosity. Fuck. 



She hasn't replied yet, but I'll take the initiative anyway. 

250 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:42
[Subject] 
...Big Bro 

[Body] 
My big brother is next to you, isn't he? He must be. 
He's making you send these e-mails, isn't he? 
Please punch him for me. 
You should just cut ties with that idiot while you're at it. 
Or else he'll turn you into an idiot too... 



Okay, so this is starting to hurt my buddy's relationship with his little sister too. 

259 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:43
Even if I were to call my buddy now, what am I supposed to tell him!? 

275 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:46
[Subject] 
Sorry 

[Body] 
I just sent a prank e-mail to ○○. 
And she thinks it's your fault. 
She might be quite mad at you now. 

280 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:46
Ah, I sent >>275 to my buddy. 

285 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:47
The question now is, what do I reply to his little sister. 
Plus, my buddy is at work right now...... 

290 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/03 23:47
>>9 
>>9 
>>9 

293 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:48
>>290 
I don't wanna get punched by him....... 

304 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:50
Oh crap. 
I still don't know what to reply to her! 

I almost sent the prank e-mail again by accident. 
Time to delete this fucker! 

315 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:52
No, calling her to apologize is like admitting that I was the one who sent it. 
What should I do? 

323 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:53
My buddy's little sister is seeing someone already. 
Besides, she's like a little sister to me too. 
I don't harbor any romantic feelings for her. But well, I do think she's kinda cute. Plus, I like how she doesn't wear any flashy clothes. 

340 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:55
[Subject] 
×× is at work 

[Body] 
I'm Big Bro, not your brother. 
I wanna know what color your cum is, ○○. 
Show me your cum. 



I don't give a fuck anymore. Sent. 

353 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/03 23:58
Does anyone here know a way to delete an e-mail before it arrives at its destination?

377 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:02
[Subject] 
...Big Bro... 

[Body] 
Looks like hanging out with my dumb big brother caused you to become weird too... 
I'm sorry for everything my dumb big brother did to you. 



She's already treating me like some pathetic weirdo. 
_| ̄|○ 

389 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:04
My buddy replied: 
[Subject] 
Re:Sorry 

[Body] 
Hey. You're sending strange e-mails to that idiot? 
Keep it up. 



I got permission from my buddy! 
ヽ(゚∀゚)ノ I won't let you down, buddy! 

403 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:06
[Subject] 
No. But.... 

[Body] 
I love you so much. 
That's why I don't want to strain our relationship any longer. 


Sent it to my buddy. 

411 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:08
I find it way harder to reply to his little sister. 

Guess I don't have a choice but to call her....... 

421 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:11
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Sorry 

[Body] 
Huh? That's the kind of e-mail you were sending to her? 
That idiot's already seeing someone, you know? 



Oh crap, he misunderstood━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 

430 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:12
It's more fun to send creepy e-mails to my buddy. 
Gets my adrenaline flowing. 

447 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:15
[Subject] 
I can't sleep and it's your fault...... 

[Body] 
Kiss! Kiss me, baby, kiss me! My first kiss


Let's try sending the same e-mail I sent to his little sister... 
...to my buddy. 

451 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:16
I don't want to make his little sister wait, but I can't be assed to come up with a new e-mail, 

so I just sent the "cum" e-mail again. 

467 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:19
[Subject] 
Re:I can't sleep and it's your fault...... 

[Body] 
Sorry, break is about to end. 
I'll come to your place after work. 

Wait, am I going to become one with my buddy tonight......? 

476 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:20
Just to be sure, I sent the "cum" e-mail to my buddy too. 

489 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:24
[Subject] 


[Body] 
Big Bro... You're making me sad. 


Looks like she just can't get enough of the "cum" e-mail. 
Sent it again. 

503 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:27
Okay. So I got a little excited after getting a reply from my buddy, 
but now that I've calmed down... 

I've done goofed, haven't I? 

517 Name:Deleted  : Deleted
Deleted

532 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:30
Let's see if I can still turn things around. 

[Subject] 
I'm sorry 

[Body] 
I think my cell phone was acting up. 
Looks like it sent the same e-mail again and again. 
I wasn't serious when I wrote that line about cum. 
I mean, I don't even know what cum is. 
Do you know what cum is? If you do, please teach me. 


It's about time I tried to save my sorry ass. 

576 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:37
I dug out a bottle of booze called "100 years of solitude" and it's still almost full. 
I have about 2 hours until my buddy comes here after work. 
Let's do this. 

586 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:40
Got a reply from his little sister: 

[Subject] 
I know! You're not really Big Bro, are you? 

[Subject] 
I can't take this anymore. I'm going to bed. 



Guess I'll send her the "cum" e-mail one last time. 

594 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 00:41
What did >>517 say? 
Anyone here who got what it said before it got deleted? 

597 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:42
>>594 
It was someone's e-mail address and it said something like "Send me an e-mail too". 

609 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:45
[Subject] 
I'm your one and only Big Bro...... 

[Subject] 
○○, be so kind and tell your Big Bru what color your cum is, okay? 


Sent. 

636 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:51
>Big Bru
This wasn't even on purpose. It was just a typo. 
_| ̄|○ 

650 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 00:55
SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP. 
You got all shy after I confessed my love to you! So moe! 
Your blushing face makes me rock hard! 
The magnum in my pants is gonna burst into flames and melt away into a pool of liquid. 
Mmhmmmm. Ahh! Splurt! Ugh...... 

Oh no, I made a sticky mess all over myself... 
I wanna make you lick me clean!☆ 

Send this one. 

666 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 00:58
[Subject] 
ヽ(`Д´)ノ 

[Body] 
It's sexual harassment to ask something like that even though you know the answer to it! 
...dumb Big Bro. 


I didn't know his little sister was a 2channer...... 

674 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:00
Wait a second. 
If she's a 2channer, I can send her as many creepy e-mails as I want and later say it was just a joke! 

Let's send more e-mails about cum. 

694 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:03
[Subject] 
Say hello to Big Bru! 

[Body] 
Oh my God. So you know what cum is, ○○? 
Does it come out when you do it with your boyfriend? 
Do you want to know what color my semen is? 


Yeah, this is sexual harassment, alright. 

718 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:08
[Subject] 


[Body] 
No, I don't want to know! 
What does Big Bru even mean? 
Big Bro is acting all weird.・゚・(ノД`)・゚・。 


She's definitely a 2channer. She should be able to take it. 

744 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:12
[Subject] 
I see. You want to know, huh...... 

[Body] 
Okay, Big Bru is going to teach you a practical skill. 
And in return, you're going to show me what color your cum is. 
It's give and take. I'll be on my way to your place now. 
Naked. 


Sent. 

761 Name: 984 ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:14
[Subject] 
Don't come! 

[Body] 
At least, put on some clothes! 



She replied within one minute! 

805 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:20
She didn't leave me a choice. 

I had to send >>650. 
Man, it's long. 

817 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:23
I'm drinking 100 years of solitude straight out of the bottle. 
Nothing can stop me now. 

840 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:28
[Subject] 
Re:SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP. 

[Body] 
...huh, it was a confession of love...? 
What a creepy confession. I'd say it was a complete failure. 


She called it creepy. 
_| ̄|○ 

862 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:31
[Subject] 
Re:Re:SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP. 

[Body] 
Fine, I got it. 
Big Bru will sleep all alone and lonely tonight. 
Ah, just one last thing. Could you say "Uyuu"? 


Alright, one hour until my buddy comes, so I guess I'll focus on drinking up courage until then.
 
890 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:38
[Subject] 
If it's just that, I don't mind 

[Body] 
Uyuu. 
Happy now? Then, good night. 


I am happy now! 

927 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:45
[Subject] 
Uyuu 

[Body] 
Thank you for bearing with an idiot like me. 
I'm sorry. Big Bru is just not himself right now. I'm even chugging booze as I'm writing this. 
I'll explain some other time. I'm really sorry. 
Would you go out with me? I'm serious. 
Love you, ○○. Uyuu. 


Okay, that's it for the little sister. 
The real problem is what to do with my buddy. 

950 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:48
[Subject] 
Re:Uyuu 

[Body] 
Now, now, I told you I have a boyfriend. 
See you, Big Bro. Uyuu. 


That was that. 

913 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 01:42
>>Big Bru 
Next time you meet his little sister, rap her. 

962 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 01:49
>>913 
What do you mean, rap her? Did you mean rape her? 

98 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 02:04
[Subject] 


[Body] 
Just got off work. 
I'm on my way now. 


My buddy's on his way. 
shake shake (((( ;゚Д゚)))) tremble tremble 

118 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 02:07
1000 Name: ('A`) Anonymous Date:04/09/03 22:23 
If this is 1000, 984 will get punched by his friend. 
1000 Name: ('A`) Anonymous Date:04/09/03 22:23 
If this is 1000, 984 will get punched by his friend. 
1000 Name: ('A`) Anonymous Date:04/09/03 22:23 
If this is 1000, 984 will get punched by his friend. 

120 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 02:07
>>118 
Don't jinx me. 

I'll be off then. Later. 

997 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:10
If this is 1000, I'll get to date Uyuu. 

14 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 17:11
Is this him? 

997 Name:Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date:04/09/04 17:10 
If this is 1000, I'll get to date Uyuu. 


21 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:12
>>14 
Yes, it was me. Uyuu. 

77 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:21
Nothing really worth reporting happened, but here you go anyway. 

At 2:30am → My buddy arrives. I show him the creepy e-mails I sent to his little sister. 
→ We have fun drinking booze while he makes fun of me and calls me names. We finish a bottle of whiskey in only half an hour. 
→ My buddy says "Let's send more creepy e-mails to her", but I shut him up with beer. 
→ We talk about being unemployed for some reason. We get depressed. 
→ We talk about being single for some reason. We get depressed. 
→ We drink more. We can't stop laughing at the live-action Sailor Moon. Creepiness is off the roof. 
→ We lose consciousness. 
I get up at 3pm → I drag my buddy to his place. 
→ I run into his little sister as she leaves the house. 
→ She gives me a karate chop and says "No sexual harassment". 
→ I get back home. 

That's about all that happened. Nothing out of the ordinary. 

78 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 17:22
>>Big Bru 

>997 Name:Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date:04/09/04 17:10 
>If this is 1000, I'll get to date Uyuu. 

I demand an explanation for this, at the very least. 


88 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:23
Ah, I also got her to say "Uyuu" and "Big Bru" to me in person. 

84 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 17:22
>>77 
> → I run into his little sister as she leaves the house. 
> → She gives me a karate chop and says "No sexual harassment". 

S-S-She's too much. pant pant 

99 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 17:24
>>88 
Hey, I asked you for an explanation for >>78! 

103 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:25
>>87 
I don't think I should push my luck twice in two days. 
In other words, I'm off to bed. 

114 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:26
>>78.>>99 

 WHO WOULDN'T WANT TO DATE A DITZY YOUNG GIRL? 

123 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 17:27
>>114 
Must be nice to be even a little popular with the ladies. 

140 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:29
>>123 
I'm not popular with the ladies though. 
The ladies at work avoid me like the plague. 

My only friends are my buddy and one other guy. 
And the only girl I can have a normal conversation with is my buddy's little sister. 
I have an older sister, but the last time I saw her was 5 years ago. 

163 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:32
( ;´・ω・`)人(´・ω・`)人(´・ω・`)人(@益@ .:;) 人(´・ω・`)人(´・ω・`; ) 人('A`)人(゚∀゚)ノ Are you me? 

168 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 17:33
Hold on, Big Bru has an older sister...? 

176 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:34
>>168 
I don't know her e-mail addy though. 
Too bad. 

182 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 17:35
>>176 
Ask your little sister. 

199 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:36
>>182 
She's not my little sister. 
She's my buddy's little sister. 

221 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 17:41
Raise your hand if you're unemployed. 












ノシ 

225 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 17:41
>>221 
ノシ 

44 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 20:03
Good morning, guys. 
Brb eating dinner. 

51 Name: Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk [sage] Date: 04/09/04 20:05
I changed my trip to 
◆r.T92KDmrc 
by the way.

758 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:30
Sent an e-mail to one of the girls at work. 
 
"What is it?" 


So short! 

767 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:31
Do I directly fire the big guns or do I use the "cum" routine again? 

775 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:32
"When was your shift tomorrow again?" 


Sent this. Hope she falls for my bait. 

798 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:35
"Tomorrow's a Sunday. I don't work on a Sunday." 


She took the bait━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 

817 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:37
"Oh right. You're busy playing with a vibrator on Sundays, right?" 


Oh yes. 

851 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:43
"Wtf? 
Anyways, could you switch shifts with me on Wednesday next week?" 


Hmm... Not exactly the reaction I wanted. She simply brushed it away. 

862 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:45
"I would if there was something for me to gain from it...." 


Baiting. 

884 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:52
"But there isn't anything I could do for you. 
I don't know who else to ask. Please switch shifts with me." 


She took the bait━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 


"You could help me masturbate!" 


Sent. 

929 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 22:59
"Wtf? 
What's with all these weird things you keep saying?" 


Hmm... She brushed it off again. In that case... 


"Hmm? Weird things? Do you mean 'vibrator' and 'masturbate'", milady? 


I'll send this. 

957 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:03
"Die, you pervert." 


How straightforward. 
Now, how do I keep this going? 

987 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:08
"Indeed, it is certainly immoral to use tools like vibrators for sexual pleasure and to indulge in masturbation. 
You are right about that, milady. So why don't you try experiencing real sexual pleasure with me?" 


Wish the character limit for cell phone e-mails was a bit higher. 

71 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:25
"Wtf?" 


She sent another one of these short replies, so in return 


"Sorry, sorry. 
I haven't had the chance to talk to you much, Miss **, so I didn't know what to say." 


I sent this. 


"So, what did you want?" 


was her reply. 

"I didn't want anything specific. I was just thinking how amazing you are, Miss **, and how fast you work." 


And this is what I just sent. 

77 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 23:27
>>71 
Hey, your replies aren't creepy at all. 
You've gone into apology mode again. 

84 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:28
>>77 
It's the "pretend I'm back to normal, then shower her with compliments just to make a dirty joke about cum" routine. 
I feel like more and more people in this thread fail because they come on too strong in the beginning. 

101 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 23:30
I wish I had as many female friends as you guys. 

116 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:32
>>101 
I don't have any female friends though. 
My buddy's little sister is the only one that's remotely like one. 
This woman I'm writing e-mails to right now, for example, is someone I've never had a real conversation with outside of work. 

141 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:36
"I'm not as fast as you make me out to be. You're just slow." 


She didn't take the bait. 


"But guys who are slow can satisfy a woman better than ones who cum quickly, can't they? 
You should know, you're a woman. I masturbated so much I turned into a slow cummer, you know?" 


Eat this. 

197 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:44
She isn't replying. 

201 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:45
Still no reply. 

Shall I use it......? 
The "cum" e-mail......! 


199 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/04 23:45
>>197 
You should respond to her request to switch shifts first. 

209 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:47
>>199 
Alright. 

"Ahh, sorry. 
I'll take over your shift on Wednesday. No problem." 



Sent. 

237 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:53
"Ah, thank you very much. I'm not going to do anything for you in return though." 



"You're going to masturbate as soon as you're alone though, aren't you?" 


I feel like we're going in circles here. 

249 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/04 23:57
"Could you please not e-mail me when you don't have anything to say?" 


_| ̄|○ 

266 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 00:00
"No, wait. There's something important I want to ask. 
What color is your cum, **?" 


Yeah, that's right. I'm the kind of guy who can't do anything by myself. 

287 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 00:05
"Die, you pervert." 


....a second time. 
_| ̄|○ 


"No, wait. That wasn't what I really wanted to say. 
I want our hearts to connect, is all. It'd be great if our bodies could connect too though." 

316 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 00:09
I think I'll do as I'm told and die for today.
 
890 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 01:41
I'm the only real virgin in this thread, aren't I? Oh boy. 

917 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 01:44
Can't decide if I should send an e-mail to my buddy's little sister. 

922 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 01:45
>>890 
I'm a real one too. 

923 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 01:45
>>917 
To Uyuu!? 

929 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 01:47
>>923 
Yeah. 
Though I'd prefer it if we called her "Su" instead of "Uyuu". 
In her e-mails, her "su" syllables are always in Katakana for some reason. 
The only other person I know who does something like that is Ikegami Ryouichi

984 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 01:56
I wanna suck Big Bru's pee pee! 

989 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 01:57
>>984 
No, thanks. 

8 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 01:58
But I wanna suck Big Bru's pee pee!☆ 
LET ME FUCKING SUCK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 

9 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 01:58
If this is 7, Uyuu will be mine. 

14 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 01:58
Say, Big Bru. 
Can I call you Big Bro? 

15 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 01:59
>>8 
Post your specs and I might consider it. 

18 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 01:59
>>14 
>>15 

27 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 02:01
[Subject] 
Let me drink.... 

[Body] 
your cum...... 



Sent. 

31 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 02:05
[Subject] 
What did I tell you? 

[Body] 
No sexual harassment! Karate chop! 



Maybe I should call it a night. 

43 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 02:07
[Subject] 
Re:What did I tell you? 

[Body] 
Sorry. I'm going to go to bed now. 
Say "Uyuu" one last time. 

54 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 02:11
[Subject] 
Re:Re:What did I tell you? 

[Body] 
And here I thought you'd say "Let's sleep together.". 
Glad you didn't. 
Good night. Uyuu♪ 

58 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 02:12
Ahh, I wanna write "Let's sleep together." now. 
But I gtg to bed. Uyuu. 

293 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 14:14
Just got back from work. Time to sexually harass my buddy's little sister. 

297 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 14:16
>>293 
And we keep telling you to quit harassing her already! 

300 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 14:24
>>297 
Welp. Guess I'll just switch to normal e-mails then. 

395 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 22:18
But if my buddy's little sister is out of question now, 

398 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 22:20
then I don't have anyone left to send creepy e-mails to. 

403 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 22:23
I'm too scared to mess with that girl from work again. 
The only other woman at work is my boss, the store manager. No way I could mess with her. 

408 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 22:29
Yes, I changed my tripcode. You only noticed now? 

It was in thread #17: 

 51 Big Bru ◆L0OpurxOrk sage 04/09/04 20:05 
 I changed my trip to  
 ◆r.T92KDmrc 
 by the way. 

Btw, my previous trip was 
#Uyuu 
I changed it because I was afraid someone might guess it. 
It was creepy as fuck anyway. 

413 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 22:30
>>408 
You make it sound like it was creepy to be into young ditzy girls! 

415 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 22:31
>>413 
It IS creepy to be into young ditzy girls. 

But I'm okay with that. 

418 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 22:32
>>415 
It's kinda late, but post her specs please. 

421 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 22:33
>>418 
She's a 20-year-old university student. 

427 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 22:37
>>421 
Thanks. 

429 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 22:39
Please don't make me send creepy e-mails to my boss. 

>>427 
She's already seeing someone though. 

453 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 23:00
http://strawberry.web-sv.com/cgi/up2/su/up0054.zip.html

Uploaded it. Get it while it's hot. 
I'm going to delete it in 30 minutes. 
It isn't password-protected. 

454 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 23:01
>>453 
Brb buying this eroge. 
ノシ 

460 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 23:05
I found a demo version. 
About to try it out now. Uyuu. 

463 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 23:06
I can't find the demo... 
Where do I have to click? 

465 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 23:07
>>463 
Open the link and click on the "NEWS" link on the upper left. It should get you to a page with the demo on it. 

500 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 23:26
Big Bru found the official homepage of the game for those of you who can't find the demo. 
http://tarte.deal.co.jp/

The game is called "Hinatabokko" and the main love interest's name is "Hayami Koharu". 
You can download the demo version from there. 

504 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 23:29
In b4 everyone begins to imagine your buddy's little sister to look like Koharu. 

506 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 23:30
>>504 
Looks-wise, she's more like Hiiragi Natsuki from the same game though. 

517 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/05 23:35
Natsuki-tan.......pant pant 

518 Name:Uyuu Senpai ◆CihyfranJw  : 04/09/05 23:36
Alright. 
This is revenge for getting dumped. 
Gonna spam Uyuu with creepy e-mails! 


I'm this close to turning into a stalker. 

520 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 23:37
>>517 
Don't. 

>>518 
Don't. 

541 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/05 23:49
Sent a normal e-mail to my buddy's little sister for a change. 

587 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:09
[Subject] 
It's an earthquake! 

[Body] 
Everything's shaking! 
Help me, Big Bru! 


Looks like I'm starting to rub off on my buddy's little sister. 

617 Name:Bad Bru490 ◆W3udHW8eaA  : 04/09/06 00:23
[Subject] 
Re:It's an earthquake! 

[Body] 
Even an earthquake won't be able to harm you when you're in Big Bru's embrace. 
So, come, jump into my arms. 
While screaming "Uyuu". 

[Subject] 
Re:Re:It's an earthquake! 

[Body] 
No, thank you. 
Uyuu! 


_| ̄|○ 

655 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:35
I'm not a troll! 
>>587 was me, but >>617 is someone else! 

659 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 00:36
>>655 
Don't worry, I know. 
I know you're too busy playing that eroge to post in this thread. 

662 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:37
>>659 
Hinata is so moe! 
Wait, how did you know I'm playing the game!? 

692 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:43
Gonna change my trip just in case. 
◆IQjpXkM9dA 
will be the new one. 

694 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:44
Changed. 

695 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 00:44
Yes, boobs! 

698 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:45
>>695 
Heh. I had that scene 15 minutes ago. 

700 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:46
By the way, my old trip was 
#bigbro 

701 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 00:46
>>698 Big Bru, are you a Nemo

702 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 00:47
>>698 
Can I be your little brother, Big Bru? 

704 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:48
>>701 
Would a Nemo be working a part-time job and playing an eroge demo on a Sunday night? 

>>702 
No way. 

707 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 00:50
>>704 
I have a question, Big Bru! 

 [Subject] 
 It's an earthquake! 

 [Body] 
 Everything's shaking! 
 Help me, Big Bru! 

Did you reply to this? 

709 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:50
>>707 
Not yet. 
I'm too busy being in love with Mizu-tan. 

712 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 00:52
>>709 
You dumbass! 

713 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:53
>>712 
I can't send any sexual harassment e-mails anymore. 
My conscience would kill me. 
Thing is though, I can't send any normal e-mails to a girl either because I'm a coward. 

725 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 00:59
>>713 
I still think you should send a normal reply. 
If she should break up with her current boyfriend, 
you could be a potential contender for the next! 

728 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 00:59
>>725 
"I'm busy playing an eroge." 


I just sent this. 

738 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 01:01
This game is pretty damn addictive. 
Uyuu. 

740 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:03
>>738 
It's addictive because it's so comfy. Uyuu. 
I only wished the music wouldn't stop when the game window loses focus. 

749 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:10
[Body] 
......are you sexually frustrated, Big Bro? 
Want me to introduce you to one of my friends? 



Here we go━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 

759 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:12
[Body] 
No, thanks. 
This eroge is my friend and lover. 



Oh boy, when I get drunk, I end up sexually harassing her anyway. 

757 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 01:12
Finally made it to 5/14. 

765 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:13
>>757 
I already beat the demo once. 

777 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:18
She's always used Katakana to write "su" for as long as I know her. 
I suppose it's just something she's very particular about. 
Kinda like how Ikegami Ryouichi always writes "n" in Katakana. 

781 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:20
IIRC, I've only seen her write "su" in Hiragana twice so far. 

788 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:25
She's not replying. 

794 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:27
Naw, I'm not worried. She did say she has to finish a report until tomorrow. 

799 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:30
[Body] 
Is it because I rejected your confession? 
......Big Bro? 


She replied! 

806 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:33
No, I won't reply with a sexual harassment e-mail. 

808 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:34
[Body] 
No, I simply enjoy playing eroge as a form of entertainment. 
Why don't you give eroge a try too, **? 

816 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:39
[Subject] 
I said, no sexual harassment! 

[Body] 
You're asking for another karate chop, aren't you? 



It's her anti-sexual harassment karate chop━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 

822 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:41
[Body] 
My report that's due tomorrow isn't getting anywhere.・゚・(ノД`)・゚・。 


She sent two e-mails. Is she telling me to stop bothering her? 

823 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:42
Ah, she wrote "su" in Hiragana. 

831 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:47
I've decided to stop bothering her for today. 

838 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:52
Guess sending creepy e-mails is a form of sexual harassment too, huh? 

845 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:57
People tell me I sexually harass them just by standing next to them! 

846 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 01:57
>>845 
How would that work...? 

851 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 01:59
>>846 
They probably feel sexually harassed when they think about how I inhale the air they exhaled every time I breathe in, 
or how the air that was in my mouth gets mixed with the air in the room every time I breathe out. 

855 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 02:03
Let's see if I can get my buddy's little sister to say "Uyuu" again. 

What do I have to lose? I've already lost the game of life anyway. 

861 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 02:05
Finally beat the demo. 
There were no sex scenes. 

863 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 02:07
>>861 
I fapped to Koharu's entrance scene three times. 

872 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 02:12
(´・ω・`) Guys... I'm scared of the earthquake. 

876 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 02:13
>>872 
Send a "Let's fuck before the earthquake kills us." e-mail to someone. 

888 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 02:24
I got an e-mail━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 


[Subject] Get to know high school girls on this website! 

898 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 02:29
>>888 
Only the subject? 

899 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 02:31
>>888 
Is it from Uyuu? 

900 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 02:33
>>898.>>899 
No, it's not from her. 
I'll never get an e-mail from Natsuki (Uyuu's new name) again. Ever. 

('A`) 

902 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 02:35
>>900 
It was just spam, huh? 
Why never? Does Uyuu hate you now? 

905 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 02:38
>>902 
Uyuu is the name of 184's target, so let's call my buddy's little sister Natsuki from now on. 

I'm letting Natsuki focus on her report. 

907 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 02:41
Just fapped to molester porn. 
My goal is to fap 16 times in one day! 

923 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 03:16
[Subject] 
I finished the report! 

[Body] 
Want me to keep you company now? 



What a pain. 
I think I'll just pretend I'm sleeping. 

924 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/06 03:19
>>923 
Oi. 
Don't tell me you lost interest in her after you fapped. 
That's like casting away a woman once you've done her! 

926 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 03:20
>>924 
I'm too busy playing an eroge(demo version). 

927 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 03:20
[Body] 
Will you keep me company in bed? 



This should do. 

934 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 03:25
[Subject] 
You dummy! 

[Body] 
Chop! Chop! Chop! 
Chop! Chop! 


She beat me up. 

943 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 03:31
Yeah. 
My life sucks. 

953 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 03:34
[Subject] 
I can't sleep and it's your fault 

[Body] 
You must be tired from working on your report. 
You don't have to stay up for me. 
Just give me a good night kiss. 
My first kiss


[Subject] 
Re:I can't sleep and it's your fault 

[Body] 
Kiss♪ 
Good night, Big Bro! 



My life fucking owns. 

973 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 03:41
Nah, I'm not going to bother her anymore this late. 

But damn, her last e-mail was kinda cute. 

Uyuu > Mizu >> Koharu >>> Hinata >>>>>> My buddy's little sister = Natsuki 

My ranking looks like this now. 

1000 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 03:48
If this is 1000, I'll go buy Hinatabokko tomorrow. 

47 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 14:21
Where I was all day? 

I was sleeping until just now. 

30 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 23:06
Just got back from work. 
Haven't bought that eroge yet. 

54 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 23:12
What should I do today? 
Mess with my buddy's little sister? 

281 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/06 23:47
Seems like she managed to finish the report in time btw. 


That is to say I got an e-mail from her━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 


But I'll wait until the thread's calmed down a bit. 

378 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:01
Oh crap! 
The golden routine worked━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 

432 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:06
I got her with the golden routine━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 

471 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:10
[Subject] 
Been to the university after a long time 

[Body] 
I'm spent. 
But the report is over and done with! 
Hang out with me, Big Bro! 


[Subject] 
Re:Been to the university after a long time 

[Body] 
Alright, come to Big Bru's room then. 
Let's play an eroge together. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Been to the university after a long time 

[Body] 
Chop! Chop! Chop! 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Been to the university after a long time 

[Body] 
Okay, let's play real-life eroge then 
We'll link our genitals and play together. 


[Subject] 
No sexual harassment! 

[Body] 
How many times do I have to tell you? 
Chop! Chop! Chop! 

476 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:11
[Subject] 
Re:No sexual harassment! 

[Body] 
Sorry, sorry. 
It's just too much fun to mess with you, **. 
Your reactions are always so cute. 


[Subject] 
(#´Д`#) 

[Body] 
Hehe... 
You're making me blush. 



[Subject] 
Re:(#´Д`#) 

[Body] 
No, I'm serious. I think you're cute. 
I envy your boyfriend, **. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:(#´Д`#) 

[Body] 
Flattery won't get you anything, you know? 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:(#´Д`#) 

[Body] 
It'll get you to cum for me! 


This, Ladies and Gents, is the golden routine! 

514 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:16
[Subject] 
( ・_・)ノ☆(*_ _) 

[Body] 
Give it a rest already! 



She got mad at me! 

531 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:18
To be honest, I'm starting to feel like I'm the one who's getting played by her. 

550 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 00:20
>>531 
You're so getting played by her. 




But there's nothing wrong with that. 

You're into that kind of thing anyway, aren't you? 

567 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:23
>>550 
Yeah. 
I love getting played with. 

I think I'll try to get an "Uyuu" and a kiss out of her and then call it a night. 

580 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 00:25
What's taking Big Bru so long? ting ting 

588 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:27
>>580 
I was busy trying to get an "Uyuu" and a kiss. 

603 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:29
[Subject] 
Re:( ・_・)ノ☆(*_ _) 

[Body] 
Right. I see your reactions are getting more and more extreme. 
I'll hang out with you some other time, so try to rest up today. 

Let me give you a good night kiss though. Smooch. 
Uyuu. 


[Subject] 
Uyuu♪ 

[Body] 
Ehehe. 
A good night kiss to you too, Big Bro. 

Good night. 

610 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 00:30
Big Bru is so lewd. 

612 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 00:30
>>603 
What's with you two? Are you newly-weds? 

619 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 00:32
>>610 
Hmm... My e-mails were supposed to be more creepy than lewd though. 

>>612 
If only she didn't already have a boyfriend. 

688 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 15:19
Aren't you guys an energetic bunch this early in the morning. Good morning btw. 

759 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 15:44
Uyuu. 

805 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 16:02
So, Big Bru, did you buy that eroge or not? 

824 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:08
>>805 
I couldn't find it in nearby stores, so I ordered it online. 
It's going to be my first eroge. 

845 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:16
I'm thinking of going to the movies. 
Which one should I watch? 
Van Helsing, House of Flying Daggers, or Fahrenheit 9/11? 

865 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:23
Do you even have to ask? Of course I'm going alone! 

875 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:26
Kimome and Tokimemo look kinda similar, aren't they? 

879 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:26
I have yet to play a Tokimemo game though. 

907 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:40
Sorry, I was taking a bath like I always do before I go out. 

914 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:44
I said I'm going alone! 
If I don't take a bath before going out, I smell terrible and get weird looks from everyone! 

927 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:50
Looks-wise, I'm a creepy loser. I even sport a fitting 5-o'clock shadow. 

928 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 16:50
>>927 
Then shave it off. 

930 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 16:52
>>Looks-wise 
Die. 

931 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 16:52
>>927 
Is there any celebrity you resemble? 

937 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 16:56
>>928 
Can't be assed to. 

>>930 
Looks-wise, I'm a creepy loser. Personality-wise, I'm a mental case. 

>>931 
Gatten Omi. 

954 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 17:02
>>937 
By the way, when you played that eroge, 

who did you find the most moe? 

Whose route are you going to beat first? 

959 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:03
>>954 
Uyuu or Hinata. 

970 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:07
Ah, yes, Mizu slipped my mind. 
Ditzy girls with glasses are moe. 

995 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:19
If this is 1000, I'll go back to being a good boy.

13 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 17:20
 995 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:19 
 If this is 1000, I'll go back to being a good boy. 

 995 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:19 
 If this is 1000, I'll go back to being a good boy. 

 995 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:19 
 If this is 1000, I'll go back to being a good boy. 

15 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:20
As for Koori... she's too depressing, so I choose Hinata. 

21 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 17:23
>>15 
Koori is earnest, courageous, has perfect looks, and is your classmate. 

What's not to like about her? 

24 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:23
>>21 
That's why she's so depressing. 

29 Name:21  : 04/09/07 17:25
>>24 
Ah, you mean Koori is depressing? 

Gotcha. 

30 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:26
>>29 
No, she makes me depressed because she's so perfect. 

32 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:27
Now that I had a nice bath, I think I'll grab a bite and then go to the movies. 

33 Name:21  : 04/09/07 17:28
>>30 
You're right. Now I'm depressed too. Let's end this conversation before I start crying. 

Keep up the good work and keep worshiping the Uyuu. 

34 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 17:29
>>33 
Uyuu. pant pant 

298 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 20:38
No, no, I'm about to head out to the movies. 

310 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 20:45
No, I simply couldn't get any tickets for a different time. 
I don't like it when there are too many people anyway. 

Maybe I'll ask my buddy's little sister along. 

320 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 20:48
[Subject] 
Re:Uyuu♪ 

[Body] 
Come watch a blue film with Big Bru at the movies! 


I asked her out. 

323 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/07 20:49
Blue film... First time I hear that termw 

329 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 20:52
>>323 
Guess kids nowadays don't know the term "blue film". 
Basically, it means porn. 

335 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 20:55
I doubt it's a real English term though. I think it's only used in Japan. 

345 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 20:59
She's not replying. 

351 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/07 21:01
Oh well, I guess I'll go watch Van Helsing all by my lonely. 

See you guys in three hours. 

648 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:18
I'm back. 

[Subject] 
Blue film? 

[Body] 
What's that? 
If you mean a movie, count me in♪ 


What an ordinary and boring reply. 

665 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:25
I may be a pervert, but I can't actually make my buddy's little sister watch a porn with me. 
It'd be sexual harassment and I wouldn't want that. 

[Subject] 
Re:Blue film? 

[Body] 
You see, a long time ago, when TVs weren't that common yet, they used to call porn on 8 millimeter film "blue film". 
The name comes from the fact that all pornographic film had to be marked blue according to the law. 


I decided to give her an honest and educational explanation. 

683 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:32
Still no reply from her. 

689 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:35
Oh shit. She seriously stopped replying! 

705 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:44
Oh okay, she replied. 

[Subject] 
You ask me something... 

[Body] 
and then reply three whole hours later!? 
I already took a bath and all. 

...and it was just sexual harassment again. 


I didn't get karate chopped this time. 

710 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:48
[Subject] 
Re:You ask me something... 

[Body] 
Sorry. I went to the movies alone. 


Sent her a normal reply for a change. 

715 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:51
Alright, I'm gonna ramp up the creepiness factor now! 

Everyone, share your creepiness with me! 

725 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:54
[Subject] 
Re:Re:You ask me something... 

[Body] 
Not fair! That's not fair! 
I thought you were asking me out, so I waited hours for your reply... 

Besides, you went to the movies alone...? That's kinda sad. 



......she thinks I'm a sad person. 

727 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 00:55
>>725 
Ask her out tomorrow thenww 

728 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:55
She even ignored my explanation of blue film. 

732 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:56
>>727 
I have to work tomorrow. 
Remember how I switched shifts with that girl at work? 

Ah, I could mess with the girl at work. 

743 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 00:58
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:You ask me something... 

[Body] 
Let's go to the movies tomorrow then. 
Or rather, let's record a movie. A blue film starring you, **. 


I'll go with this. 

754 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 01:01
>>743 
More like starring her and her boyfriend. 


761 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:03
[Subject] 
Too bad. 

[Body] 
I'm eating out with my boyfriend tomorrow. 
I'll have to decline the movie offer too. 


That's reality for ya....... 

771 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:05
>>754 
Let's go with that. 

[Subject] 
Re:Too bad. 

[Body] 
Then let's record a movie starring you and your boyfriend. 

792 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:10
[Subject] 
Too bad again. 

[Body] 
My current boyfriend and I don't do stuff like that. 
What happened to the no-sexual-harassment rule? 
Chop! Chop! 



She chopped me! Her karate chop is back! 

800 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:11
Is she still a virgin? 
I'll ask her. 

808 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:14
[Subject] 
Re:Too bad again. 

[Body] 
I see. In other words, you're a virgin? 
You still have your hymen? 

821 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:20
[Subject] 
ヽ(`Д´)ノ 

[Body] 
Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop! 


I wonder if she really is a virgn. 

829 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:22
Do I dig deeper or do I call it a night with the usual Uyuu/kiss combination...... I don't know what to do. 

832 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 01:22
>>821 
"Which is it? Are you a virgin or not? Are you still pure or not!? 
What am I supposed to do now!? Tell me what to do, Turtle Hermit!" 

Send this to her. 

844 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:26
[Subject] 
Re:ヽ(`Д´)ノ 

[Body] 
Which is it? Are you a virgin or not? Are you still pure or not!? 
What am I supposed to do now!? 
Tell me what to do, Turtle Hermit! 


Copy-pasted from >>832 

864 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:32
She replied. 

[Subject] 
Ewww 

[Body] 
Quit sticking your nose in my business already. 
No, quit sending me e-mails altogether. 

873 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:34
[Subject] 
Re:Ewww 

[Body] 
Okay, I'm going to stop sticking my nose in your business. 
Instead, I'd like to stick it into you, **. 


Here we GO! 

883 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 01:39
Big Bru, please keep spamming your buddy's little sister with creepy e-mails 
until she bursts into tears today. 

885 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 01:39
Seems like Big Bru is serious about becoming her next boyfriend. 

886 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:41
[Subject] 
Look, I'm serious. 

[Body] 
Enough of that already. 
I don't like to talk about that topic. 
Is it normal to talk about things like that for people your age, Big Bro? 


No, I don't think it's normal to talk about things like that even for people my age. 

891 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 01:42
>>886 
How old are you, Big Bru? And how old is she? 

893 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:44
>>883 
I bet I already made her cry on the first day I sent her creepy e-mails. 

>>885 
I'm not. 

>>891 
I'm a university graduate and freelancer/part-timer. You can figure the rest our yourself. 
My buddy's little sister is 20 years old. 

903 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:47
[Subject] 
It's normal even for people younger my age 

[Body] 
I'm sure it's the same for your boyfriend. It's all he ever thinks about. 
Let me teach you all about it so you don't embarrass yourself out there. 
I'm a virgin though. 
But then again, you're a virgin too, right, **? 


Oh boy, even I'm starting to find myself creepy. 

913 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:52
What I'm trying to accomplish? 
Stuff like confessing my love or getting a girlfriend doesn't belong in this thread, so... 

trolling my buddy's little sister, maybe? 

916 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:55
[Subject] 
Eww... 

[Body] 
Seriously...? 

...In any case, I'm not a virgin anymore. 



Whoa, looks like she's starting to get really nervous. 

923 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 01:57
>>916 
>Seriously...? 

I wonder which of the two things you said it refers to. 

931 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 01:58
Well, she's seeing someone after all. 
But seeing how she even forgot to write "su" in Katakana, I'd say she's quite nervous. So maybe it was just a lie. 
If she wasn't a virgin, she would have said so when I first asked her. 

Let's just hope she's lying. 

944 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 02:02
>>923 
I thought, 
it refers to "It's normal even for people younger my age" and "it's the same for your boyfriend.", 
but you're right. It's probably about me still being a virgin at my age......... 
_| ̄|○ 

[Subject] 
Re:Eww... 

[Body] 
So you're experienced in things like that, **. 
Will you take the lead and teach me then? 


This should be good. 

960 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 02:07
[Subject] 


[Body] 
Whoa, whoa! 
Wait a second here. 
I couldn't do that even if I wasn't a virgin anymore. 
Can we please just stop talking about this topic? 


She's panicking. 
It might be interesting to see how she reacts if I confess my love to her now. 

973 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 02:11
Okay, no confession of love for now. 

[Subject] 
Re: 

[Body] 
Why not? 
There's no reason to panic if you're experienced. 
You've seen a dick or two, haven't you? 



GO! 

977 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 02:12
If Big Bru can keep this up, I feel like he's going to get more and more attractive to her. 
Or is it just me? 

980 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 02:13
>>977 
I feel like I'm getting less and less attractive to her though. 

23 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 02:32
[Subject] 
Uhh... 

[Body] 
I'm sorry. 
...I'm a virgin. 
Can we stop talking about it now? 
Big Bro, you big dummy. 


[Subject] 
Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
My bad. 
I'll treat you to lunch next time, okay? 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
Chop! 
I'll forgive you if you treat me to a movie too. 
Also, no sexual harassment anymore. 
Or I'll cry. 


Looks like she was a virgin, after all. 

33 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 02:34
She seems close to tears, guys. Can I let her off for today? 

43 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 02:36
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
Alright, alright. 
Give me a good night kiss, okay? 
Smooch. 
Uyuu. 

There. 

53 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 02:41
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
No more kisses and Uyuu for you today! 
Dummy! 
I'm going to bed. 


Oh boy. I think I made her mad. 

696 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 21:58
I'm back, guys. 

710 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 22:04
Creepy e-mails to my buddy, huh? 
There's nothing fun about that. 

715 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:04
Number of times you've confessed your love: 
Number of times you've been confessed to: 
Number of female contacts in your cell phone: 
Number of people you've had sex with: 
Please tell us these things. 

728 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 22:07
>>715 
Number of times you've confessed your love:  0 (Not counting jokes and creepy e-mails) 
Number of times you've been confessed to:  0 
Number of female contacts in your cell phone:  5 
Number of people you've had sex with: 0 


By the way, are you sure you don't wanna know 
how many people I've dated? 

731 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:08
>>728 
Why? 
Don't tell me you've dated someone. 

735 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 22:09
>>731 
Of course not! 

744 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:11
Keep sending those Nemo e-mails, you Nemo

753 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 22:14
>>744 
I'm not a Nemo, but let me try sending a Nemo e-mail anyway. 

[Subject] 
Read this in Ootsuka Akio's voice: 

[Body] 
Damn, a barrier! 

761 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:16
>>753 
Who did you send it to? 

770 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 22:20
>>761 
To my buddy's little sister. 


But how come no one's commenting on my Nemo pun...? 
I guess I'm the only creepy otaku in this whole thread who's old enough to get it, huh........? 
_| ̄|○ 

785 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/08 22:26
A long time ago, there was an anime on air that made you wonder whether NHK had gone mad. 
It was long before CC Sakura. 
The title of the anime is "Nadia: The Secret of Blue Water". 
That's right. It's the anime that was said to be inspired by "Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea". 
The captain of the submarine Nautilus is called "Nemo". 
And he was voiced by Ootsuka Akio. 
Every time one of his attacks was fended off, he'd shout "Damn, a barrier!". 
That's why, back then, 
Nemo's trademark phrase was "Damn, a barrier!", 
much like Muska's was "Look! The people... They look like garbage."....... 

787 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:26
>much like Muska's was "Look! The people... They look like garbage." 

You just had to draw that comparison, didn't you? 

788 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:26
>>785 
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 
I DON'T WANT TO DIE YET!! 

You mean that? 

791 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:27
>>788 
I'm sure that episode was a traumatic experience for many. 

796 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:29
>>787 
Don't be like that. 
Even Yoshihiro Togashi referenced it in YuYu Hakusho back then. 

810 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:33
Meanwhile, she still hasn't replied. 

827 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:39
I sent the same e-mail to my buddy and he got it right away. 
[Subject] 
In Motomu Kiyokawa's voice: 

[Body] 
You're right about that, Nemo! 



Damn him. How did he get himself a girlfriend when he gets all my obscure references........ 

834 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:42
No, I don't really have a problem with her and her boyfriend having sex if they love each other. 
I said it before, but she's basically like a little sister to me anyway. 
Plus, they're both adults now, they're free to do whatever they want. 

836 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:42
Say, what does Uyuu even mean? 

839 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:43
>>836 
Koharu Hayami from the game Hinatabokko likes to say Uyuu. 

849 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:49
No, I'm not mature. I just know my place. 
I know that I'm a creepy otaku. 
And I was so sure that my buddy's little sister had long been deflowered too. 
You know, it's a miracle that she stayed a virgin this long. At least until yesterday, that is. 
Try to find a virgin girl in her 20's nowadays, it's almost impossible. 
Unless it's a fantasy world or a fairytale. 

854 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:51
I'll be honest, Big Bru. Your buddy's little sister seems to like you and you seem to like her. 
Which is why I don't understand why you would want to drive her to the brink of despair just to entertain 2ch. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm a 2channer and I don't want you to stop. I'm just curious. 

862 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:57
>>854 
I know, the virgin conversation yesterday was pretty bad, 
but I doubt she's at the brink of despair. 

863 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 22:58
[Subject] 
Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
Jean Reno 
Nicholas Cage 
Denzel Washington 
to me.

She replied. 

866 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 22:59
>>863 
Is it from the little sister? 

868 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 23:00
>>863 
She knows him!? I don't even know him... 

874 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:02
>>866 
Yes. 

>>868 
I don't think she knows about his role in Nadia though. 
Ootsuka Aiko has voiced many famous actors like 
Jean Reno, Nicholas Cage, Denzel Washington, Dolph Lundgren etc. 
So it's not really surprising that she knows him. 

879 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:06
[Subject] 
Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
Weren't you on a date today? 


I'm curious about how it went. 

885 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:11
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
We had lunch together, is all. 


So she says. 

892 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:13
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
Does that mean you're still a virgin? 


Sexual harassment, sexual harassment. 

905 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:19
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
I'm a little drunk, but I'm still a virgin! 
Wait, what are you making me say!? Chop! Chop! 


Looks like she got wasted. 

909 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:20
I can't believe she got wasted and is still a virgin. 
Her boyfriend must be a real gentleman. 

914 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:22
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
Show me your panties. 



She might actually do it since she's drunk. 

919 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 23:25
>>914 
Come on, give her a break already ... 
Use this if you like ↓ 


[Body] 
Sorry for always messing with you. 
It's just that I can't deal with the fact that you're seeing someone else. 

923 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:26
>>919 
I want to avoid any chance of us actually going out. Not like there was any chance of it happening in the first place. 
In any case, I'm not planning on confessing. 

930 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:30
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
I can't show you my panties! 
You've been acting like some old pervert lately, Big Bro! 


.......like some old pervert... _| ̄|○ 

932 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 23:31
>>930 
But she can show you her bra, right? 


933 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 23:31
>>I can't show you my panties! 
Does that mean she's fine with showing what's inside her panties? 

938 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:34
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
Okay, no panties. But you can show me what's inside your pantie or your bra, right? Like, your nipples? 


>>932-933 
I like where this is going. 
Here's to hoping she sends a sexy selfie! 

946 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 23:35
>>Big Bru 
Make sure to post the pic here if she does. 

951 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:37
>>946 
That would be a dick move, but I feel like I might actually post it if it doesn't show her face. I deserve to go to hell. 

958 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:40
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
No, I can't show you any of that! 
I haven't even shown them to my boyfriend yet. Uyuu. 


Finally! She said Uyuu of her own accord! 

962 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/08 23:41
"But I'm more important than your boyfriend, aren't I?" Send this plz. 

974 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:44
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will always be 

[Body] 
But I'm more important to you than your boyfriend, aren't I? 
You can show them to me. 


Let's give >>962 a try. 

996 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/08 23:49
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Ootsuka Aiko will 

[Body] 
My boyfriend is more important. 



_| ̄|○ 

16 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:02
>>1 
Thanks for the new thread. Uyuu. 

19 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/09 00:04
>>16 
Have you sent a reply to 
"My boyfriend is more important."? 

21 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:05
>>19 
Should I? 

24 Name: ('A`) Anonymous  : 04/09/09 00:06
>>21 
"I'm fine with being second most important. Just send me a pic please." 

29 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:10
[Subject] 


[Body] 
I'm fine with being second most important. Just show me something. 
Like, your panties. 


>>24, it is. 

36 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:16
[Subject] 
Re: 

[Body] 
Noo! 
I'm so tired! 


Apparently, she's tired, so I think I'll let her sleep now. 
I have to get up early too tomorrow. 

43 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:20
But then again, I can't actually be NICE to her. 
I guess I'll just pull back for now. 

[Subject] 
Re:Re: 

[Body] 
Right. Sorry for taking up your time. 
Rest up. 

How's this? 

45 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:21
I'm a man who doesn't know any kindness. I can't send any kind e-mails. 

47 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:22
[Subject] 
Re:Re: 

[Body] 
Here's half a Bufferin! 


Will this do? 
Sent. 

56 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:27
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re: 

[Body] 
How kind. 
Uyuu. 


Looks like it was the right choice. 

62 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA  : 04/09/09 00:29
I'd say that's it for my buddy's little sister. Not just for today, but forever. 
I just can't mess with her anymore. 

671 Name:Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date:04/09/09 23:42
When I wanted to head home after work, it was pouring rain. 
And when I got home, my buddy's little sister was standing in front of my room, completely soaked. 

687 Name: ('A`) Anonymous[sage] Date:04/09/09 23:45
 >>671 
 >◆r.T92KDmrc 
Don't get fooled by this impostor. It's his old ID. 

684 Name: ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date:04/09/09 23:44 
 >>671 
 Die. 

693 Name:Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date:04/09/09 23:46
Then my buddy's little sister said 
"You were right all along, Big Bro." 
and told me how she got almost raped by her boyfriend. 

694 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date:04/09/09 23:47
Move aside, guys, I'm gonna kill that guy. 

707 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date:04/09/09 23:50
Anyways, the real Big Bru just got home wasted. 

144 Name:Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date:04/09/10 01:37
No, I just had too much to drink. 
I'm totally wasted. 

777 Name:Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date:04/09/10 14:25:21
I want a yaoi end. 

790 Name:Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date:04/09/10 14:32:21
Dammit, why does this board have to display the seconds too. I can't samefag like this! 

184 Name: Big Bru ◆r.T92KDmrc [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:40:38
"......Uhh......Mmh..." 
 Protest against me. Suppression of emotions. Self-control. All these sentiments escape from her mouth in the form of gasps. 
"What's wrong?" 
 I ask her, but I already know the answer. For I am the cause of it. But I don't care. I extend my arm to her chest. Taking rough aim, I flick across what seems to be tip of her breast with my thumb. Bingo. 
"Ahh......" 
 A small quiver passes through her body. 
"No...... Don't......" 
"What do you mean?" 
 At the same time, I fondle her breast. Every time I do it, I feel her nipple harden a little more. 
"......I mean... don't touch me...... there......" 
 I move my right hand nonchalantly to her thighs. Then to the spot between her thighs. This spot, rarely ever exposed to sunlight, feels especially tender, slightly wet, and sticky on my palm. 
"......Mmmh..." 
 Her sexy cries feed my sadistic side. 
"Would you prefer it if I licked you there?" 
 As I ask her, I stop caressing her, but leave one hand on her breast. 
"...umm, I..." 
 Feeling shy and bashful, she doesn't seem to know what to answer. 
"If you really don't like it, I won't touch you anymore." 
 As I say this, my palms cover her breasts, but not in a rough manner. My hands touch her ever so slightly in a gentlemanly manner as I wait for her answer. 
"Do you want me to continue?" 
 I look up to her face. She looks away, blushing, with teary eyes, and says...

192 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:42:38
>>184 
Post the rest. 

219 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:50:45
Oh, there is no rest? 
Thanks anyway. 

221 Name: 180 ◆Rz9nn6fFWE [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:51:46
Well then. 

223 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:52:10
>>221 
Let's go! 

224 Name: ('A`) [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:52:19
Will we ever get to read Big Bru's moe e-mails again...?

228 Name: ('A`) [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:52:59
>>Big Bru 
Is Uyuu doing fine?? 

234 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:53:59
>>224 
I thought they were creepy e-mails....... 

>>228 
She's doing great. 

245 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:57:14
[Subject] 
Tomorrow 

[Body] 
Let's go to the movies together! 
We could watch "Taking Lives". 


I asked her out. 
My buddy's little sister, that is. 

247 Name: 180 ◆Rz9nn6fFWE [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:57:49
I'll report today's events tomorrow.

251 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 22:58:22
>>247 
What the hell!? 
I was looking forward to it. 

266 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:03:35
Okay, fine. 

[Subject] 
Re:Tomorrow 

[Body] 
I'd love to! 
By D. J. Caruso! 
None of my friends wanted to. They're all too busy watching Socrates in Love. 


I guess my buddy's little sister doesn't like Socrates in Love. 

274 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:06:34
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Tomorrow 

[Body] 
Yeah, I also like (Angelina) Jolie more than Milla (Jovovich). 


I left out the parts in parenthesis in my e-mail. 

281 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:09:11
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Tomorrow 

[Body] 
Tomb Raider vs. Resident Evil!? 


She likes talking about movies, doesn't she? 

286 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:12:27
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Tomorrow 

[Body] 
Don't worry, it's a (D. J.) Caruso movie this time, so it won't be as bad as Tomb Raider. 
Black Cat Run was the best! 

293 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:16:36
[Subject] 
Black Cat Run 

[Body] 
would have been better if (Frank) Darabont had directed it imo. 

296 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:18:55
[Subject] 
Re:Black Cat Run 

[Body] 
was just a rip-off of The Fugitive anyway. 

305 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:22:43
[Subject] 
Σ(゚□゚ ) 

[Body] 
But you just said it was the best! 

313 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:24:40
[Subject] 
Re:Σ(゚□゚ ) 

[Body] 
I'm a guy that's known for taking back his words! 

320 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:28:13
[Subject] 
What about going to the movies? 

[Body] 
If you take it back too, I'll cry! 

398 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:51:38
Huh? Yes, I went to a mixer once. 
We were 6 guys and 6 girls. We went to a karaoke bar and rented 3 rooms. 
But I somehow ended up alone in one room. 

417 Name: ('A`) [sage] Date: 04/09/10 23:59:03
What happened to the e-mails, Big Bru?

420 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:04:30
>>417 
I'm still sending normal e-mails back and forth. 

451 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:14:30
It got bit a long, but I think we're almost finished. 

453 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:15:13
[Subject] 
Re:What about going to the movies? 

[Body] 
I'm taking it back too. 
I forgot I have to work tomorrow. 


[Subject] 
Σ( ̄ロ ̄lll) SHOCK 

[Body] 
What!? 


[Subject] 
Re:Σ( ̄ロ ̄lll) SHOCK 

[Body] 
Maybe another time. 
Let's have a real date when I'm free. 


[Subject] 
Whoa. 

[Body] 
Are you asking me out on a real date, Big Bro? 

455 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:15:47
[Subject] 
Re:Whoa. 

[Body] 
Yeah. A real date. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Whoa. 

[Body] 
Ehehe. 
Ehehehe. 
But we're not going to do anything lewd, you know? 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Whoa. 

[Body] 
I'll try to hold back for once. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Whoa. 

[Body] 
Not once. Forever and always. 

[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Whoa. 

[Body] 
That's mean! 
By the way, is it okay to go on a date with me when you have a boyfriend? 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Whoa. 

[Body] 
It counts as volunteer work because you'll never get a date otherwise, Big Bro. 


[Subject] 
_| ̄|○ 

[Body] 
......I'm going to kill myself. 

457 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:16:46
[Subject] 
Now, now. 

[Body] 
You can't kill yourself! 


[Subject] 
Re:Now, now. 

[Body] 
I might change my mind if you show me your panties. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Now, now. 

[Body] 
Jeez... 
There you go saying lewd things again. 
No. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Now, now. 

[Body] 
Then I'm going to kill myself. 


[Subject] 
Hey! 

[Body] 
Don't! 
Jeez. What's fun about seeing the panties of a girl you don't even like? 

467 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:18:24
[Subject] 
Re:Hey! 

[Body] 
I do like you, **. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Hey! 

[Body] 
...huh? 
Eh? 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Hey! 

[Body] 
I like you. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Hey! 

[Body] 
Uh... 
Are you serious? 

470 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:19:04
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Hey! 

[Body] 
I'm serious. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Hey! 

[Body] 
And you're not just lying to get me to show you my panties? 
I won't show them to you, you know? 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Hey! 

[Body] 
I'll survive. 
I like you. 


[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Hey! 

[Body] 
Ahh... 
Uhh... 
Ehh... 


[Subject] 
SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP. 

[Body] 
You got all shy after I confessed my love to you! So moe! 
Your blushing face makes me rock hard! 
The magnum in my pants is gonna burst into flames and melt away into a pool of liquid. 
Mmhmmmm. Ahh! Splurt! Ugh...... 
 
Oh no, I made a sticky mess all over myself... 
I wanna make you lick me clean!☆ 


I'm still waiting for a reply. I'm going to get so much hate for this. 

496 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:23:17
[Subject] 
That again!ヽ(`Д´)ノ 

[Body] 
Big Bro, you dummy! 
Chop! Chop! 


Alright. It's apology time. 

511 Name: ('A`) [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:26:03
Big Bru may be an asshole, but at least he always keeps us entertained. 

519 Name: ('A`) [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:27:21
>>Big Bru 
I know the perfect apology e-mail. 

[Subject] I'm sorry. 
[Body] I'm sorry I send e-mails to you. I'm sorry I look forward to your reply. 
    I'm sorry I have a cell phone. I'm sorry I'm in the same class as you. 
    I'm sorry I'm alive. I'm sorry I was born into this world. 
    I'm sorry I even exist. 

>>511 
Agreed.

521 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:27:49
Right. 
I'm tired of messing with my buddy's little sister. 

Whoa, it's like I'm one of those handsome guys who get tired of a girl after sleeping with her once! 

559 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:39:03
Here goes my apology. 

[Subject] 
I'm sorry. 

[Body] 
I'm sorry I sent a sexual harassment e-mail to you every night. 
I'm sorry I have a cell phone. 
I'm sorry I live in the same town as you. 
I'm sorry I'm alive. 
I'm sorry I was born into this world. 
I'm sorry I even exist. 
I'm going to break my cell phone and then kill myself, so please forgive me. 

>>519 
Thanks. I used it as a reference. 

596 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:45:03
[Subject] 
Re:I'm sorry. 

[Body] 
Well, I don't mind forgiving you since you're always like this, 
but did you get dumped by your girlfriend or something? 
You've been acting strange lately, Big Bro. 


Note: I don't have a girlfriend. I've never had one. 

631 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:49:43
[Subject] 
Re:Re:I'm sorry. 

[Body] 
Yeah. To be honest, 
I think my girlfriend is going to dump me soon... 
My cute girlfriend who's always stayed by my side even though I spam her with sexual harassment e-mails every night. 
How did you know? 

674 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 00:55:47
[Subject] 
Ehehe 

[Body] 
It's the power of female intuition. 
Well, I'm a girl too, so I'm kinda sensitive to things like that. 
So you do have a girlfriend, Big Bro♪ 



She just proved that female intuition can't be trusted. 

709 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:01:06
[Subject] 
Re:Ehehe 

[Body] 
I see. So you're sensitive, huh? 
My girlfriend is sensitive too. 
By the way, which part of you is sensitive? Your nipples? 


This is my reply. 

737 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:07:17
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Ehehe 

[Body] 
Chop! Chop! 
I'm sure you get dumped because you always sexually harass her like that! 
You have to treat girls with care! 


Do I chase her further? 
Or do I go back to sending creepy e-mails? 
I'm not going to make a serious confession though. I want to stay in this thread forever. 

773 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:13:06
[Subject] 
One of my acquaintances 

[Body] 
told me to treat you with care. 
That's why I won't send any sexual harassment e-mails to you anymore. 
I won't do anything to make you feel sad anymore. 
I care about you the most. I love you. 



This is what happens if a virgin guy tries to chase a girl. 

806 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:16:33
The acquaintance is, of course, you guys. 

825 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:20:07
[Subject] 
Jeez... 

[Body] 
You sent it to the wrong person, Big Bro. 
You're making me blush... 
What's the point of sending it to me? 
Take good care of your girlfriend. 
Good night. Uyuu. 




I haven't even gotten started yet. 

863 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:25:46
[Subject] 
Re:Jeez... 

[Body] 
Wait, don't go to bed yet. 
I meant to send it to you, **. 
I'm jealous because I envy your boyfriend, **. 
I love you, **, goddammit! 

867 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:26:10
[Subject] 
Re:Jeez... 

[Body] 
Wait, don't go to bed yet. 
I meant to send it to you, **. 
I'm jealous because I envy your boyfriend, **. 
I love you, **, goddammit! 

876 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:27:41
Whoa, duplicate post! 

887 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:31:14
[Subject] 
I won't fall for that! 

[Body] 
You just want to sexually harass me again! 
Preventive chop! 

896 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:32:07
You guys want me chase her further? 

917 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:35:13
[Subject] 
Re:I won't fall for that! 

[Body] 
I can't blame you for doubting me. After all, I've always only messed around so far. 
But let me ask you seriously this time. 
Please just say no if you don't like me, **. 

I love you. Please go out with me. 

943 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:38:59
I'm a creepy loser. Please don't make me give her a call. 

992 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:45:12 
[Subject] 
Uhh... 

[Body] 
I'm... already seeing someone... 

29 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:49:30
[Subject] 
Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
I see. 
So you don't like me, huh? 
I won't write you any e-mails anymore. 
Sorry for everything so far. 

69 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:55:20
[Subject] 
Uhh... 

[Body] 
But the movie... 

79 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 01:56:24
You guys still want me to carry on? 

124 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 02:01:42
[Subject] 
Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
Oh, the movie. 
Sorry, I shouldn't have asked you out to the movies. 
It wouldn't be fair to your boyfriend. 

152 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 02:06:41
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
Can't we just stay the way we were? 
I like you, Big Bro. 

210 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 02:15:25
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
That's what women often say, but men just can't go back to the way things were once they've confessed their love. 
Men want to love the woman they love forever and always. 
Their lust and desire won't leave them alone. They get sensitive and regretful. 
So if she says no, he doesn't have a choice but to get as far away from her as possible or he'll start hating himself. 
In the end, he'll even start hating the woman who made him hate himself. 
I don't want to start hating you too, **. 
Sorry about the movie. 

258 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 02:21:22
[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
I don't want to lose you, Big Bro. 
But I have a boyfriend... 
Would it be unfair... to ask you to give me some time? 

273 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 02:23:10
Hmm... What should I do now? 

366 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 02:33:51
Inhabitants of the creepy losers board, I'm sorry. I've decided to give it a serious try. 

[Subject] 
Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Uhh... 

[Body] 
I can't take it any longer. 
I know I'm forcing you to make an extremely difficult decision, **. 
But I think that waiting for your feelings to change would be a very unfair thing to do to your boyfriend. 
That's why I'm going to seriously tell you how I feel about you, **. 
And I want you to answer my feelings honestly, **. 

I love you, **. 

517 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 02:48:30
[Subject] 
How I seriously feel 

[Body] 
The first time you brought my big brother home, I thought you were such a nice person. 
You seemed like a mature grown-up man to me. 
Compared to my childish big brother, you looked so cool to me and since I was still just a high-school student, I couldn't help but feel attracted to you. 
I thought to myself that all university students must be adults like you. 
Then I got into university and started going out with my boyfriend. 
He was actually my very first boyfriend, by the way. 
But once I started dating him, I realized he wasn't like you at all even though he was a university student too. 
It made me think that Big Bro must be a special kind of adult. 
I'll write the rest in my next e-mail. 


I'm waiting for her next e-mail right now. 

649 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 02:56:51
Damn... 
I'm so nervous... 

She still hasn't sent the rest yet. 

711 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 03:00:36
It's here━━━━━━(゚∀゚)━━━━━━ !! 


Give me a minute, guys. 

737 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 03:01:45
[Subject] 
How I seriously feel 

[Body] 
And, when you sent me that e-mail last week, I thought "Ahh, Big Bro isn't any different. He's just a child too.". 
But after a while, I realized that you're not acting like a child because you're a child but because you're an adult who wants to act like a child every once in a while. 
You were showing me a childish side that you wouldn't show to anyone. 
Having seen a side of you that you normally don't show, I felt like I was somehow special to you. 
And when you confessed your love to me today, I realized it. 
I wasn't just attracted to grown-up men in general. It was you I was attracted to, Big Bro. 
Please give me time until Monday. 
I'll settle everything with my boyfriend! 

I've always liked you, ××(my name). 
It's a bit early, but I'd be happy to go out with you! 

822 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 03:04:34
So, umm, do I send the SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP SLURP e-mail now? 

853 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 03:05:36
I'll call her. 

24 Name: Big Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 03:16:02
I'm back. 

We were both too embarrassed to have a real conversation. 
I think all she said was 
"Yeah", "Sorry", "Ehehe", "Once I've settled things with my boyfriend.", "I'll be in your care.", "Chop!". 
Also, I got her to call me by my name at the end of the call. 
It sounded so awkward it made me hard. 

100 Name: Anonymous ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 03:21:57
[Subject] 
×× 

[Body] 
Ehehe. 

Good night. 
Uyuu. 


This is the last e-mail I'll post. 
Sorry, guys. 

258 Name: ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/11 03:41:17
I'm just posting to say 

my buddy's little sister is a sophomore. 

288 Name: Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/13 22:58:23
Reporting in. 
I haven't heard whether my buddy's little sister has settled things with her boyfriend or not. 
I'm not planning on asking her about it either, so there's that. 
But I've settled things with a few people, and that's what I'm here to report. 

The first person I went to 
was her current boyfriend. 
I was expecting to get punched in the face.

313 Name: Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/13 23:11:51
First, I apologized to him for the NTR. 

According to him, 

he was the one to ask my buddy's little sister out and initiate the relationship. 
But after a while, he too started thinking 
"Something's off." 
and feeling uncomfortable. 
He had a crush on a girl back in his home town, but he moved here before he could confess. 
After moving here, he ran into my buddy's little sister and asked her out because she resembled his crush. 
But after a few dates, he noticed that she seemed to feel similarly uncomfortable around him. 
"I think she couldn't turn me down because she's a kind girl." 
is what he told me. 
He, on the other hand, couldn't bring himself to dump her 
since he was the one who asked her out in the first place. 
"I'm sure we would have been in for a bad breakup if we had continued dating. 
You see, you actually helped us move on. Thank you very much." 
He also said he's planning on confessing his feelings to his real crush when he goes home for New Years. 
"I'm glad you're the person she really likes." 
I replied that I'm glad he's the ex-boyfriend of my buddy's little sister too. 
I was really happy about meeting him. 


Next up is the second person. 

326 Name: Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/13 23:17:16
Then I told my buddy everything. 

He said 
"You surrendered to my little sister's army, huh? You damn traitor! 
We're enemies from today on! 
I can't believe you're doing this to me even though you sent me this e-mail! (the "cum" e-mail) 
So you were just playing with my feelings, huh!?" 

He was acting retarded like he always does, so his little sister and I made him shut up with a double chop. 

I helped them make up and we had lunch together. 
She finally called him "Big Bro" and that was it. 

Only one person left.

349 Name: Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/13 23:26:45
Lastly, I settled things with my buddy's little sister. 

In the beginning, she was like a little sister to me. 
But from now on, I'll have to treat her like a girlfriend, like a woman. 
I wonder when my desire to simply mess with her turned into love. 
I couldn't pinpoint a time and it doesn't really matter either because I told her about my feelings for her now. 
She told me the same thing and we talked about it some more. 
I don't recall the exact conversation, but it was similar to the e-mail conversation I posted here last time. 

She also said 
"Please don't call me 'Big Bro' anymore, ××." 
I'll kinda miss getting called that though. 


All that's left now is to give the people in this thread my final report. 
I don't want you guys to hold back at the very end. It wouldn't be befitting of the nature of this board. 
So please, go ahead and call me names and insult me as much as you like. 

Here goes my final report. A shocking report to remember me by.

376 Name: Bru ◆IQjpXkM9dA [sage] Date: 04/09/13 23:33:06
This happened when I was driving my buddy's little sister home. 
She suddenly asked me: 

"Now we're officially boyfriend and girlfriend, right? 
 And we're officially in love with each other, right?" 

I, of course, replied "Of course.". What else is there to say? 

"Okay. It's a bit too early to kiss, but I can do this for you instead." 

What comes after a confession and before a kiss? 
I couldn't figure it out. 





"××, do you still want to see my panties?" 


Of course, I did. 
And she showed me her panties right then and there! 

I'm off now. Farewell, guys!